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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25035910">don't make a fuss</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/nights/pseuds/nights'>nights</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ambassador Sokka (Avatar), Bisexual Sokka (Avatar), Bisexual Zuko (Avatar), Coming Out, Drinking, Drugs, Eventual Fluff, Firsts, Fluff and Smut, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Multi, Period-Typical Homophobia, Post-Canon, Protective Zuko (Avatar), Sharing a Bed, Sokka is a bi disaster, Southern Water Tribe, Threesome - F/M/M, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, all aboard the zukka train, and they were sparring partners, author makes up economics as she goes along, some light pining for added flavor, they smoke weed that is not weed but is definitely just weed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 08:55:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>94,734</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25035910</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/nights/pseuds/nights</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko needs a little administrative help, so Sokka clears his schedule, and accidentally falls in love.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aang/Katara (Avatar), Sokka/Suki/Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Suki/Ty Lee (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>285</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>713</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. You've Got Mail</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Just a run of the mill, self-indulgent post-canon fic. This takes place leading up to the five-year anniversary of Sozin's Comet.</p><p>Title taken from the song "I'm Not In Love", originally by 10cc, but I've been obsessed with Kelsey Lu's haunting cover. I'd highly recommend a listen.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p2">
  <span class="s1"> <em>What a disaster.</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">His coronation felt like a dream, now. Years ago, all those cheers, echoes in the face of the stack of papers looming on Zuko’s desk. He wondered how he could have been so optimistic. So naive. He picked up the parchment again, the sweet letter from Iroh.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“My nephew, ascending the throne is the easiest part. It will not be easy, guiding our nation into the future… you will meet those who wish to see your failure. It pains me that I cannot be with you through this time in your life, but you must be seen as a Fire Lord in your own right; I fear that my presence would suggest that you were something of a puppet. Zuko, you must trust your judgement. Your struggles have taught you well, you would do well to trust those insights. And know, that I will always be here, a messenger hawk away. It’s so lovely here in Ba Sing Se. My tea shop has really bounced back! Why, just the other day I had a customer tell me she…”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">It continued, delving into the specifics of steeping. Zuko let the letter flutter down onto the desk again. He understood why is uncle kept his distance for now, but here in the palace he felt alone, and surrounded. Ozai had never deigned to teach him how to govern; then again, any teachings Ozai might have had were moot.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko massaged his temples. He felt the paranoia closing in on him. Is this how Azula felt? No. That train of thought led to nowhere productive.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The cracks in their victory had started to show. Zuko’s ascension had been heralded by many, but a hundred years of propaganda does not die quietly. Loyalist cells were simmering in the homeland, distributing materials romanticizing the old days, the days the Fire Nation loomed large. The economy was brittle; after a hundred years, industry was inextricable from the war, and was hungry for a new market. On top of it all, the issue of the colonists threatened to destroy already tenuous relationships with Earth Kingdom leaders. Some were so new, relocation was the obvious solution. But what to do with the others? The very oldest were almost a hundred years old, with generations of colonists knowing only Earth Kingdom shores as their homes. Many had intermarried, children had grown up and grown old with two heritages. They wanted to integrate with the Earth Kingdom, but with a century of bad blood running freely, the Earth Kingdom demanded relocation.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">A few deep breaths. Aang had left for the Earth Kingdom to smooth things over, and taken Katara with him. Zuko hoped the Avatar, of all people, could find a middle ground. Zuko certainly couldn’t. Where is the middle ground between staying and not staying? A few more deep breaths. Aang is handling it.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The others had scattered to the wind, visiting occasionally, each visit feeling shorter and shorter. Toph was healing her family. Suki and Ty Lee were tending to Kyoshi Island. And Mai… after her release from prison, she said she needed time alone. Zuko didn’t know how much time was too little, or too much. He had written a letter, only to crumple it in his fist. The last letter hadn’t gone over too well.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Some Fire Lord I am,” he whispered to himself. The papers on his desk mocked him. It was easy to talk about restoring his nation’s honor, but it was looking like Zuko would have to drag his nation to it kicking and screaming.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">He started another letter to Iroh. They all flowed freely from him, lately, a stream of worry smearing itself onto the page. Pages of fears, only to get thrown out every time. He didn’t want to worry his uncle. He was finally content with his cups of hot jasmine tea. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stood, and went to the door. He spotted a servant, and waved a hand.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Could you bring me some jasmine tea? In my office, please.” She nodded and disappeared.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">His office seemed especially cavernous at night. Lanterns glowed softly in the corners, but the ceilings stretched up into the dark. It seemed ironic to Zuko, the grand scale of the palace. What was supposed to make the royalty untouchable left him feeling small and fragile. He settled in his chair again, facing the empty chairs set across the desk from him. During the day they’d been filled with minister after minister, but now they watched Zuko silently.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The servant returned, carrying a tray of steaming tea. She set the tray gingerly on the desk, eyes downcast.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Ah, thank you,” Zuko said. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">She dipped her head, bowing slightly, and turned to leave.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What’s your name?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Lai, my lord.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Thank you, Lai. And — just Zuko is fine.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, my lord,” she repeated, not looking up. She left quickly. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko sighed, cupping his tea with both hands. He cast his eyes over his work again. His homeland was a tangled mess, and what if he didn’t have the vision to untangle it? </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">He picked up his brush to write another letter.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s nose was numb from the cold. It was an almost pleasant feeling, familiar. It meant he was home. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">He squinted against the sun, gleaming off all the snow and ice of the South Pole. A small fleet of ships was pulling in, lashing themselves to the makeshift docks the southerners had put in place while construction was underway. The new front plaza was going along well, slower than expected. After all, the North had sent fewer waterbenders than expected, and waterbenders were pretty crucial to the, you know. Bending of ice. He held up his plans in front of him, tilting it slightly. He really should work on improving his penmanship; even he had trouble reading his chicken scratch sometimes.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Hakoda came up behind Sokka and clapped him on the shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Looking good, son. Before you know it, we’ll be the ones procrastinating on helping the North, and not the other way around.” </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, there’s not a lot we can do about it now,” Sokka replied.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Oh I know, I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t give them a hard time. Remind me what this part’s going to be, again?” He pointed to a circle on the plans with a cartoon inside it.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I told you, an ice statue. Of an otter penguin.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, right. Why?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What do you mean, why? It’s decorative! It adds to the ambience.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“No, I mean, why an otter penguin?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, the first thing that Aang did when Katara and I busted him out of the iceberg was go penguin sledding. I thought it would be nice to commemorate that. Also, they’re cute.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Huh.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">A sailor from one of the recently docked ships approached them, several scrolls in hand.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Greetings, Chief Hakoda. Sokka. Before we cast off from Whaletail Island, we received some letters for each of you. Hakoda, I believe these are from the Northern tribe, and one from your daughter. Sokka, these are for you.” He handed each of them their letters.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What, did Katara not send me one?” Sokka pouted.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Sokka, Katara sends you letters all the time, I’m sure she just didn’t have anything new to update you on.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“She’s traveling across the world with Aang, how could there not be something new,” he grumbled, peeling open the seal of one scroll. Toph, with a rant about her family. You wouldn’t know she loved them but for the fact that she was still there with them, trying. Another scroll, this one from Suki. Sokka couldn’t help but smile. He missed her, the smell of her hair and her sense of humor, but he knew she hated the cold. He knew she had to rebuild her home, just like he did.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The last scroll was very fancy, and Sokka did appreciate fancy things. It had a thick, sturdy covering, a gold seal, fine silk ties, the works. He slid the letter out, unfurling it. Unsurprisingly, from Zuko. Sokka smirked. Zuko always did have a flair for the dramatic.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">As he read the letter, his smirk fell, and Sokka chewed on his lip. All of a sudden, he was worried. Zuko, asking for help? Something must have gone horribly wrong to prompt this. Sokka rushed to his hut, scrolls and plans in his arms. He set them down messily, pacing back and forth by the fire still smoldering from the morning.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1"> <em>What do I say? I’ve never run a fire nation before. Why would he write to me, of all people? Isn’t this what Aang is for?</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka sat down to write back. <em>Why wouldn’t he write Iroh? Iroh was supposed to be Fire Lord in the first place, he’s bound to have some advice on this kind of stuff. </em>He paused, brush dripping splatters of ink onto the empty page. Sokka wasn’t good with the written word. He wished he could just talk to Zuko, face to face. <em>A visit? No, Zuko couldn’t leave, who knows when a coup could boil over. But I could. Could I? My plans…</em></span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka looked at his sheaves of paper, outlining his vision in detail. He had workshopped the shit out of it, spent gallons of seal fat keeping his candles lit late into the night. He was loathe to let it out of his sight.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Then again, he had all those detailed plans. Surely Hakoda would be able to follow them? <em>Better give Dad another run-through of the color-coding system. Just to be sure.</em></span>
</p><hr/><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m here, Zuzu! At your beck and call!” Sokka crowed, bursting into the royal chambers with a trio of distraught servants following just behind.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Mmphh, huh?” Zuko jerked awake, reaching a hand to his forehead.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s me, Sokka, or have you forgotten already? Your buddy, remember?” Sokka jumped onto the bed, and Zuko was fully awake now. One of the servants looked like she was about to faint.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s so early — what’s going on. You’re in the South Pole. Why am I awake right now?” Zuko groaned, voice thick with sleep.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I got your letter,” Sokka said matter-of-factly. “You know I’m not very good at expressing myself in the written word, so I decided to come to you.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Okay. Just — give me a second.” Zuko laid back, running his fingers through his hair. “Please, it’s okay,” he sighed, waving away the horrified servants. He pulled a blanket over his face, and asked, muffled, “So, you left the South Pole?” </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, I’m here, so I’m not in the South Pole, yes. Unless you moved the Fire Nation capital to the South Pole when I wasn’t looking.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko groaned again. “You know you didn’t need to make such a long journey. I’m doing fine.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“That’s not what your letter said!” Sokka chirped, poking Zuko’s side softly.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I know.” He was quiet for a beat. “I shouldn’t have made you come all this way.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, it’s very self-absorbed of you to think that you can make me do anything. I decided to come myself, so I did. My dad’s holding down the fort while I’m gone, so don’t worry your princely little head about that.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not ‘princely’.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“When have you ever not been princely? You’re a prince.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m the Fire Lord now. Kind of.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I think a little more than kind of.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko mumbled something into the blanket. “What’s that, your princeliness?” Sokka teased.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Nothing. Sokka, it’s barely light outside. Why did you have to wake me up so early?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I came straight here after getting into port. What else was I supposed to do, pick my nose?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Sleep.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, sorry to disturb you. I guess I’ll just get back on my ship again, since this was such a nuisance,” Sokka sighed dramatically, a smile tugging at the edge of his mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“No —” Zuko blurted. Sokka grinned, victorious. “I <em>am </em>glad you came. It’s just. Let’s wake up at normal people hours.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Okay, fine. That sounds like a fair compromise. I’ll let you sleep, Zuzu.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t call me that.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">When Zuko woke up the second time, he was alone. Was it a dream, seeing one of his friends again? He rose from the bed and dressed in a rush. It would make sense, after all, he’d been missing them and no wonder —</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">But he <em>was </em>there, sprawled across a chaise in the adjoining anteroom, sipping a cup of pitch black tea. Sokka perked up.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Hey, you’re finally awake, jerkbender. I was worried you were gonna sleep the day away.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko rubbed at the sleep-crust still at the corners of his eyes. “It’s my day off.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, that’s good because I have a whole day planned for us. I haven’t been away from the South Pole in months, I have a very long to-do list.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“… To-do list?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, to-do list. But first, and more importantly, it’s time for breakfast.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka gestured to the spread in front of him. There were several different dishes set out, with two bowls full of steaming jook. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Uncle used to make this for me in Ba Sing Se,” Zuko murmured, sitting down.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I know, you’ve mentioned it. A couple of times, now.” Sokka grinned.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The jook was thick, with ginger and cilantro sprinkled across the top. Zuko hadn’t had it in so long, as he was usually served dishes considered more “refined” by the palace cooks. The hot porridge was comforting. Sokka’s smile was comforting. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“So, back to my to-do list,” Sokka said between slurps. “First, shopping. Back home, we don’t yet have the bustling trade that I’m planning on, and I do miss stuff. I need new outfits, wearing the same old same old is getting boring. Then, we’re going to the beach. It’s so cold in the South, I haven’t been swimming in so long —”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko zoned out, enjoying his hot breakfast and Sokka’s rambling. He was so animated, and Zuko was happy to just go with wherever Sokka’s day took them. He had missed his high-energy friend, so different than the stiff servants and somber ministers.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The palace guards tried to insist on Zuko taking the palanquin, but finally listened when Zuko used his fire-lord-voice with them. Usually he tried not to be terse; today, Zuko wanted to forget his responsibilities as much as possible. And besides, with his dual dao strapped to his back, he could defend himself just fine.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stood back as he watched Sokka gush over a particularly pretty knife at the blacksmith’s.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Look, I know it’s not practical. I have plenty of <em>practical</em> knives. Maybe I shouldn’t get it.” He looked up at Zuko. “You think I shouldn’t get it. Zuko, look at it, it’s so pretty! Look at the hilt.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m looking at it, Sokka,” Zuko said, amused.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I shouldn’t get it. Should I? No.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“You should get it.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Okay, I’m getting it.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka left their spree laden with his new knife, a historical atlas, and a myriad of trinkets to give as gifts once he got back home. By the end, Zuko was wondering if they should have dragged a guard along with them just to help carry everything.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I guess you really missed stuff, huh,” Zuko mused.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Look, don’t blame me. You don’t have to carve it yourself every time you want a new royal headpiece.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">They dropped Sokka’s spoils off in his ship’s cabin at the docks. It was a smaller sloop, and stuck out like a sore thumb surrounded by the metal ships of the Fire Nation, blue sails fluttering proudly. The cabin itself smelled warm and smoky, animal skin hammocks hanging from the ceiling.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“My dad’s going to love his new tools. Bone does the trick, has for generations, but metal really helps get the job done faster, you know.” Sokka packed the gifts, excited. “And the spices will really add some kick to stewed sea prunes.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll never understand why you and Katara like them so much.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s familiar, you know.” Sokka shrugged. “We grew up eating it.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Still.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka turned to Zuko and clasped his arm, smiling mischievously. “Maybe I’ll make it for you sometime.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stuck out his tongue and grimaced. “I think I’m good. I’ve tried it before, and once was enough for me.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Katara doesn’t make it like I do!”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko chuckled. Both men were silent for a beat.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“You know, Sokka —” Zuko started, then paused.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yes? You’re changing your mind about the sea prunes?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko barked a surprised laugh. “Ha, no. I just mean, I’m uh. Really glad you’re here.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t get mushy on me now.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not being mushy. I just appreciate you coming all the way here. It’s a long trip.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Not that long.” Sokka smiled at Zuko. The Fire Lord blushed. He felt twisted up inside, like he was exposing his soft underbelly and honestly, he just wanted to curl back up again and pretend like it didn’t matter all that much to him.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“You’re all alone out here,” Sokka said, softer. “I’m sorry we left you.” He pulled Zuko into a hug, which Zuko was grateful for. This way, he could hide his red cheeks in Sokka’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, you had to go home,” Zuko mumbled into the thick, plush cloth of Sokka’s Water Tribe tunic, woven warm for the icy South.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I did, but now I’m back.” Sokka pulled away, hands grasping Zuko’s shoulders. “And now it’s time for the beach!” he declared, whisking Zuko out of the cabin and back off the ship.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka burst up from the water, waving to Zuko back on the shore.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Why don’t you come in, jerkbender? You’re never gonna get a tan if you sit under that umbrella all day.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s hot,” Zuko complained, gesturing up at the sun, beating down from overhead.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“That’s what the water’s <em>for</em>!”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Fine.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stood, bending under the lip of the low beach umbrella. Sokka watched him gingerly enter the water, wincing at the chill. He made a mental note to ask Zuko if he’d changed his training regimen recently, he was looking great. Ahem. Sokka dipped under the water again. He’d had trouble toning up, okay? Sokka wanted to look <em>like</em> that, not <em>at </em>it.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">When Sokka came up for air again, Zuko had swum up to him, his black hair plastered to his face.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Okay, I’m in the water now,” Zuko grumbled.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“See? Don’t you feel cooler now?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah. It is nice.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’m always right.” Zuko splashed him. “Hey!”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka retaliated, and Zuko fled, swimming back toward the shore. Zuko stood in the shallows, and took a fighting stance.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“You’re lucky I’m not a waterbender,” Sokka quipped, lunging at him.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">They sparred clumsily, weighed down by their feet in the sand and the splashing waves. One foot slipped and then another, and they both fell, black sand billowing up in the water around them as they untangled from each other.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">After he caught his breath, Sokka blurted, “Zuko, do you —” Wait. Sokka suddenly became aware of how close Zuko was to him. A bit awkward to ask now. He’d ask later.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What?” Zuko said, panting from the exertion. He looked at Sokka expectantly.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Nothing.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What is it?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka swallowed and pulled himself up. “Nothing! I forgot what I was gonna say.” Sokka splashed out of the water and spread out on one of the towels they’d laid out. He bit his lip, then spotted the small boxes they’d brought with them. “Oh. I was gonna say, do you think we brought enough snacks?” He opened a small package and popped a few fire flakes in his mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stood with his hands on his hips. “I think so. You brought practically the whole palace larder.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Snacks are an important part of a beach day, Zuzu.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I really need you to stop calling me that.” Zuko sat down on the adjacent towel.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Whatever you say.” Sokka watched him from the corner of his eye. “Zuzu.” </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko gave Sokka’s arm a soft punch, but grabbed a few fire flakes from the box Sokka’s hand was in, fingers brushing.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Hey!”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Sokka, they’re <em>my</em> fire flakes.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“You could have asked nicely.” And given Sokka fair warning.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">They ate lunch, chewing in silence for a while. Neither one realized how hungry they actually were, and the palace cooks really knew how to season their meats. Sokka loved his tribe’s food, but man did he miss the variety of seasonings the other nations had available to them.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“The cooks did a great job,” Sokka said through a mouthful of spicy komodo chicken.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“They always do.” Zuko was picking at his food now, prodding it with his chopsticks.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What’s on your mind?” Sokka asked, swallowing.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Nothing.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka gave him a look.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Fire Lord stuff. There’s just a lot going on.” Zuko sighed and set down his chopsticks. “It just seems like as soon as I put one fire out, another starts.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Well, you are the… <em>Fire</em> Lord.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko pretended to be exasperated, but Sokka caught the small smile Zuko let escape.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s overwhelming. And I feel so guilty, because we won. I got what I wanted, I’m the person I was meant to be. But every morning I wake up and my jaw is clenched. I’m always exhausted, even with a good night’s rest.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka considered him for a moment. “You need a hobby.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Or something. Something to distract you from Fire Lording. It’s all you do, all day, so you can’t turn your brain off when you need to.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Maybe.” Zuko looked thoughtful.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1"><em>Maybe I am helping,</em> Sokka hoped. “We’ll figure it out later. For now, the beach is your distraction,” he said brightly, lying back down on the towel.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko stared down at him, brow furrowed. “Yeah.” He cast his eyes out to the sea again. From his viewpoint lying down, Sokka couldn’t see his face, just his arm propping him up and his back. His broad back. Sokka trained his eyes on the underside of the umbrella. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">They stayed there, safe, chatting about their globetrotting friends and listening to the seabirds. It seemed like all of a sudden, the sun dipped behind the lip of the caldera and sent the beach into twilight. The breeze across Sokka’s chest made him shiver.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“It’s getting late,” Zuko remarked when he noticed Sokka’s shiver. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I guess it might be time to head back.” Sokka sat up and pulled his tunic on, stealing a glance at Zuko. “This was nice, though, wasn’t it?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“A nice break from Fire Lording?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, Sokka, it was.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Good.” Sokka was pleased with himself. Mission accomplished. On to the last item of the day.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had flopped down on one of Zuko’s plush couches. He couldn’t blame him, they were quite comfy. One of the few real perks of being responsible for a nation, he supposed.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Now, we have one more thing to do before we call it a day, my lord.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko bristled. He felt color rising in his cheeks. “Okay, even ‘Zuzu’ is better than ‘my lord’. Do you have a problem with my name?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“No I do not, your princeliness. As I was saying. Tonight, we’re gonna get you drunk!”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko rubbed his temples. With the early morning wake-up and walking around all day, his “day off” had just left him tired and achy.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Sokka, do we have to?” he groaned.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Yes,” Sokka declared, “we have to. Now what kind of liquor do you Fire Nation pansies have around here?” He rubbed his hands together.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t know, the regular kind?” Are there different kinds? Zuko hadn’t branched out very much, it seemed.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Zuko, that’s cute.” Sokka bounded up, peeking out of the door of the anteroom and into the hallway. “Hello?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko could overhear something between Sokka and the door guard, and before long a tray of two tiny cups and bottle of liquor arrived. Sokka popped the cork open and poured two cups with glee. Zuko regarded him skeptically. Maybe Sokka had gone stir-crazy, cooped up in all that ice. Sokka handed him a cup, full to the brim with the aromatic liquor. It burned in Zuko’s nose.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Cheers,” Sokka said, clinking his glass with Zuko’s and downing the whole thing at once. Zuko tried to do the same and gagged, coughing on the spiced alcohol. It tasted like herbs, after the burning had gone down.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka laughed and patted Zuko on the back. “There we go. You guys brew tasty stuff. I like the spices.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko grimaced. “I don’t. How did you not gag on that?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“This is nothing compared to Water Tribe stuff.” Sokka winked. “I’ll have to bring you some from my ship’s stores.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Before Zuko really knew what was happening, Sokka had goaded him into drinking another glass, and then another. He lost track of counting. What did it matter, anyways? It made his limbs feel nice and heavy.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">He was laying on one of the chaise lounges, head thrown back to look at Sokka upside down.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I have meetings tomorrow.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Just cancel them.” Sokka waved his hand, eyes closed. “You’re the Fire Lord, you’re whole point of the meetings anyways.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Nooo, I can’t,” Zuko whined, covering his face with his hand. “They’ll all think I’m a mess.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“No, they won’t.” Sokka moved over, leaning above Zuko so he was within his eyesight. “No one thinks you’re a mess.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Mmph. Yes they do. The loyalists do…” Zuko’s hand worried at a loose thread in the cushion. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Have you ever considered that the loyalists are absolute idiots?” Sokka was grinning so wide. Zuko stared up at him, vision swimming. The Water Tribe people really did have such blue eyes. But Zuko had always known that. Right?</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I mean. About my father, yes. He—”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka interrupted, “— he sucked.” Sokka’s hand reached out to stop Zuko’s pulling at the loose thread. “Would you stop worrying for, like, thirty seconds?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s hand was warm, and Zuko’s chest felt tight. He thinks that maybe he should shy away from the touch, but lets Sokka clasp his hand anyways. His fingers felt warm, the skin roughened in places from working and fighting. </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I like sparring with you,” Zuko blurted, his train of thought barreling through his mouth unbidden. Maybe he didn’t make sense. Zuko wasn’t sure if he was making sense even to himself.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“What?” Sokka said, bemused. His fingers stayed where they were, so Zuko gripped them tighter. He didn’t know if he was going to let go, now that his friend was finally here. Yes, his friend. Sokka was a dear friend.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Uhm, I was just thinking. My guards are afraid.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Of who?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Me. They’re afraid of sparring with me, so I haven’t been getting any practice.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Zuzu, I’m not a firebender.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I know.” The name didn’t bother him, not right now. “I mean with swords. And without.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll fight you sometime, then. Not now, we’re both drunk. I’d hurt you.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko gasped, indignant. “You think you could hurt the Fire Lord?”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka laughed. “Zuko, I took down a whole fleet of Fire Nation airships. I think I can take on one measly jerkbender.” </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko huffed, and smoke spiraled up from his nostrils. “Oh, that’s new,” he noted, blowing a small puff of flame. Sokka pulled back from the fire.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">“Watch it!” </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Suddenly Zuko realized how close to his face Sokka had been. “Sorry. Just never really been drunk before. Least, not like this.”</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Sokka hummed in response. His hand had left Zuko’s, and now Zuko’s hand felt empty. His fingersfound the loose thread again.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">The candles burned low, so the pair said goodnight. Zuko couldn’t help but pull Sokka into a clumsy hug, arms thrown around his shoulders. Had Sokka gotten taller when Zuko wasn’t watching? Had the years made him broader? He smelled like something.</span>
</p><p class="p2">
  <span class="s1">Zuko thought about it as he laid in bed, surrounded by empty space and a plethora of pillows. A campfire, he decided. That’s what Sokka smelled like. Zuko liked campfires.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I love comments, if you liked it please leave one! :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Edge of... Something</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko and Sokka, realizing things.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko woke up with bleary eyes and a throbbing head, and the sun was blindingly bright. He shouldn’t have let Sokka keep handing him cups of liquor.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A servant poked her head into the room and called to him softly. Zuko peeled an eye open to look at her. “Lai.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“My lord, you have your education council meeting soon.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please let them know I won’t be in attendance.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“My lord?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not feeling well this morning.” She stayed in the door frame, waiting. “Must be a cold or something. I’m fine, Lai, just need more sleep.” He pulled a pillow over his head to block out the light.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Very well, my lord.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The next person to disturb Zuko was Sokka, who was annoyingly chirpy.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“How are we doing this morning, your princeliness?” Zuko felt the mattress dip where Sokka sat down. Sokka dragged the blankets off of Zuko’s face. How rude of him. “I heard you canceled on the education council.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko groaned and covered his face with his hands. “Yes. I feel like death.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well, you can’t die yet, you still have things on your to-do list.” Sokka handed him a cup of water. “Drink it, you’ll feel better.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko obeyed, hauling himself into a sitting position against his mound of pillows. The headache had subsided with a few more hours of sleep, but only just. His stomach complained of a missed breakfast.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why did you make me drink so much last night?” Zuko grimaced.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I didn’t <em>make</em> you do anything. You got drunk all on your own,” Sokka said, poking him. How was Sokka so upbeat? They drank the same amount.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko asked him as much.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“<em>I </em>was smart enough to drink water <em>before</em> bed. A little food will help you, too.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka was right, of course, but the rest of the day ended up being a lost cause anyways. Zuko made a mental note to never drink the night before he had important things to do. The last thing he wanted to be remembered as was the most hungover Fire Lord.</span>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko was pulling up his hair into a topknot as he hurried toward the council chambers. Why did they have to make the palace hallways so damned long? Sokka took long strides alongside him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You know, a warrior’s wolf tail is much easier to do on-the-go,” Sokka quipped.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I <em>know</em>, Sokka, but I can’t show up to the trade council with a perky ponytail. I’m the <em>Fire Lord</em>.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s a <em>wolf</em> tail. Fierce, like a wolf.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sure, Sokka.” Sokka enjoyed needling the young Fire Lord, it was his favorite pastime lately.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had been anticipating this meeting. Finally, something concrete to do, after a week of largely playing therapist to Zuko. It’s not like Sokka wasn’t happy to comfort Zuko — his <em>friend</em> Zuko — but he felt kind of helpless sometimes. He didn’t like seeing Zuko stressed out, with nothing Sokka could really do to fix anything. He just cared a lot about his friend, okay? It was only natural to feel closer after spending so much time together. And Sokka was just that kind of guy, he cared a lot about his friend. <em>All</em> his friends.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The councilmembers were waiting patiently for them when they arrived, Zuko bursting in, harried. He sat down quickly and pulled his chair in with a scrape.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry for the delay, everyone,” he apologized. His voice was deeper, different than when he was talking to Sokka over dinner or his papers, alone in his office.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“We are at your service, Lord Zuko,” the Minister of Trade intoned, bowing his head.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Regardless, I appreciate your patience.” He was so serious all of a sudden. It was like Sokka was looking at a different man, with Zuko’s spine ramrod-straight and his shoulders squared.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The meeting started with a long, dense discussion of domestic trade developments. Production volumes, disputes between provinces, job losses after the decline of military production demand. Sokka found himself losing focus, his mind drifting. The councilmembers were indistinguishable from each other, each a slight variation on a Fire Nation nobleman with everything to lose at the end of the war. Sokka and Zuko were many decades younger than even the spryest of them. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka noticed absently that they all seemed very concerned with finding a new outlet for all that metal production, now that the Fire Nation wasn’t buying up their weapons. Zuko’s brow furrowed during this discussion. He didn’t seem to appreciate them bemoaning their decline of fortune. Sokka found it distasteful, too… but Zuko was doing a good job of being imposing, Sokka thought. <em>Gotta make sure all these old windbags know who’s in charge now</em>. Zuko had donned his formal robes for the meeting, where he usually wore a more casual tunic and trousers around Sokka. They were probably pretty uncomfortable, now that Sokka considered it. Although. The shoulder pieces did make Zuko’s shoulders look very broad. Definitely — definitely helps with looking intimidating. Along with that voice Zuko was using. It made him sound… authoritative. Hmm. Probably good that the Fire Lord sounds authoritative. His voice sounded so much deeper than usual —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ambassador Sokka?” Zuko’s voice startled Sokka out of his train of thought.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ehm, yes. Sorry.” Zuko sent him a look from across the table.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“The developments in the Southern Water Tribe.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, right! I do have a few updates of interest.” This was his opportunity to pique these old geezers’ interest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka dove into his pitch, emphasizing the rate of growth of the Southern Water Tribe and its status as a novel market for trade. Maybe he could get a few of the councilmembers to send more ships down their way.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He couldn’t quite tell if he was successful, but managed to catch a few murmurs about expanding trade routes towards the South. He’d win them over with time.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">When the meeting was over, Zuko was stiff and formal until they turned the corner, out of earshot and eyesight of the councilmembers.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think it went well,” Zuko said nervously. “I don’t know, what do you think?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“We’ll just have to wait and see if they actually decide to start trading with us.” Sokka thought for a moment. “If I’m being honest, it seemed like they thought there wasn’t much we have to offer.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That’s not true!” Zuko was indignant. “The Southern Water Tribe has plenty to offer.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well <em>I</em> know that Zuko. I just don’t know if those grandpas have ever seen Water Tribe goods in their life.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko wilted slightly. “You have a point. There hasn’t been much <em>cultural exchange</em> for the last hundred years.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka glanced at him as they walked back to the residential wing of the palace, passing portraits of conquerors. The space for Zuko’s portrait hung empty.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll send a message to my father, and to the North Pole. We need to get some Water Tribe craftsmanship out here, show them what they’re missing.” Sokka smiled encouragingly at Zuko.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That’s a great idea.” Zuko paused. “Thanks for coming today.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No problem. It’s not like I had anything else to do,” Sokka brushed it off. He hoped Zuko couldn’t see his slight blush. He couldn’t really explain why his stomach clenched. It was just a meeting.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You had some really good input. I think it’s good for my people to see the value of other nations personally.” Another pause. “And it was nice to see a friendly face, for once.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t mention it.” It was really nothing. He had just tagged along.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He’d put Sokka and his crewmembers up in a nice row of rooms just down the hall from his own quarters, but Sokka spent all his time in Zuko’s apartments anyways, lounging about when Zuko was occupied and there was no reason for Sokka to be there, too. Zuko started to expect to see him there, sharpening his pretty new knife or doodling the turtleducks that wandered past the balcony. It was just nice to have someone he could trust, really. Zuko didn’t start to look forward to it, not at all.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The cherry trees were in bloom, and pink petals drifted past the balcony like snow. On windy days it was almost a blizzard, but that day the air was calm. Sokka had pulled a chair out there and Zuko sat close by, re-reading his favorite play, a tragedy with witches and ghosts. It was so much better live, but the arts had suffered during the war and there wasn’t a decent theater group in the capital to speak of. Reading would have to suffice.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko glanced up from the story. Sokka was deep in concentration, focused on his carving. He’d found a nice piece of wood in the garden, soft and pliable, and was intent on making a little trinket out of it. Sokka was biting his lip, eyes boring into the wood, the evening light catching in his hair. You know, Zuko had never noticed it before, but Sokka’s hair wasn’t truly black so much as really dark brown; it lit up amber, a halo in the low sunlight. A halo? Zuko trained his eyes on the page again. Something about ghosts. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">But he knew how that story ended. No matter how many times he re-read it, he devoured the pages, but right now it couldn’t keep his attention. He wondered what Sokka was making. Zuko looked at the wood carving. He couldn’t really tell right now, it was still a set of abstract forms, yet to be defined as anything in particular. Now that he was paying attention, the knife Sokka was using looked quite sharp, and was very close to Sokka’s fingers. They were deft and sure, the muscles moving to shift the wood in his grip. Pretty fingers — what? Zuko looked at the page again, staring at the characters but not reading.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">What an odd thought, intruding so suddenly into Zuko’s head. Pretty fingers… anyways. It was totally normal to admire Sokka’s skill.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re getting much better at that,” Zuko said.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Thanks, I’ve been working on my carving. Gotta have something to do while you’re in meetings all day.” Sokka’s eyes stayed focused on the wood.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm-hmm.” Zuko stared at his play. He stole another glance at Sokka’s hands. Just one more. Then, focus on the play.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko still suffered through late nights poring over his work, but thankfully he now had a companion when the candles burned low. He really appreciated Sokka’s input, and the work went easier when there was someone to joke around with.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He particularly appreciated when Sokka broke out the liquor, on nights when Zuko’s jaw got particularly tense from a long day of dealing with upset ministers. Sokka would pour them cups and Zuko would sip dutifully, listen to whatever subject Sokka had decided to rant about that night.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“— and I’ve designed the main city center to have dedicated space for festivals. We used to have one for the Winter Solstice, even when I was a kid, and Gran-Gran told me that when she was little, they’d throw huge celebrations —” he rambled on.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko liked the energy. His councils were stodgy, stuffy. No heart. Maybe Sokka could help bring them some heart. Sokka’s eyes would light up, the blue catching in the low candlelight. Zuko envied his blue eyes, so striking. <em>I bet the girls love that. Sokka’s always been good with girls.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko envied that, too. He thought of Sokka and Suki together and felt a twinge of jealousy. Jealous of Sokka’s people skills, of course. Even at his best, Zuko had been clumsy with Mai, never quite knowing the right thing to say, only putting together the right words on accident.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I wanna show it to you when it’s all done,” Sokka said, excited.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm?” Zuko’s thoughts had drifted.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“The Southern Water Tribe. I want it to rival the North. Love ‘em, but it’s time someone gave them a run for their money.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m sure you will, Sokka. If anyone can, it’s you.” Zuko’s head felt fuzzy and warm from the liquor. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka grinned at the compliment. “Yeah, yeah, sure.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko liked making Sokka smile. It felt good. To have a friend. A friend with those pretty blue eyes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Have you talked to Mai recently?” Sokka asked suddenly, tilting his head.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What? Why do you ask?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, I don’t know.” Sokka cleared his throat. “I just. I guess I expected her to be around, now that everything’s settled down.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko had been trying not to think about her. “Yeah. I haven’t seen her. I… honestly, I thought she would have at least written by now.” He took another gulp of liquor. “But I, uhh. I guess not.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“She didn’t come see you? After the war?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No,” Zuko snapped, bitter. He instantly regretted it when he saw Sokka’s face fall.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I didn’t mean to — I’m sorry. If I was prying,” Sokka said quickly. “We don’t have to talk about it.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No, no.” Zuko sighed. “I’m sorry I snapped. It’s just that — you know,” Zuko gestured around aimlessly, “it stings still. After the war, after she was released from prison, she said she needed space, which — I understood that. But, after all this time, and no word —” he stopped.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s like it didn’t matter?” Sokka offered.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah. Like, as if it doesn’t matter that I cared about her. I don’t know. That’s the problem, I don’t know why she hasn’t visited, or written.” Zuko stared into the golden liquid in his cup. Still a little left. He could fix that.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t think it didn’t matter.” Sokka’s eyes were soft.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“How do you know? Has she talked to you?” Zuko downed the rest of his drink.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well, if it didn’t matter, she wouldn’t have saved you at the Boiling Rock.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I guess.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“If she’s meant to come back, she will,” Sokka said, hand touching Zuko’s leg lightly. The contact was comforting, even as Zuko’s head grew fuzzier. What a good friend. Sokka was so good to him, so understanding. No one understood him like that. How was he managing before, without him? Without anyone?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Alright, Zuzu, it’s late.” Sokka patted Zuko’s leg and stood, stretching.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm, you know I don’t like that name…” Zuko murmured, tongue thick in his mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know. That’s why I call you that.” Sokka swung an arm around Zuko’s shoulders, guiding him toward the door to his bedchamber.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">When Sokka bid the Fire Lord goodnight, his head was swimming, too, which was… funny. Sokka didn’t think he’d had that much to drink. Hm. Guess he’d had more than he thought.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka liked the schedule that he and Zuko had figured out for themselves. On days when Zuko was occupied with long domestic meetings, Sokka trained with whichever unlucky guard was around and worked on his carving. He tagged along for the foreign policy meetings, and sent lots of letters back and forth to his father. From what Hakoda wrote, it seemed like Sokka’s plans were plenty detailed to keep the construction work running smoothly. And on days off, Sokka attempted to kick Zuko’s ass.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Payback for all that time chasing us,” Sokka would say when they circled each other in the small courtyard, just off of Zuko’s rooms.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not gonna go easy on you just because you can’t bend.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’d be insulted.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They learned it was better to spar in the mornings. It got Sokka’s blood moving, and with the onset of summer the air was coolest before noon. Midday was too sweaty.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">That morning the sun took longer than usual to burn off the clouds and mist. Sokka could never quite get used to the way mist clung to the humid Fire Nation earth, even after daybreak. It was never misty in the South Pole. Each of them had shed their tunics, as always, and the cool air shocked Sokka’s skin.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Fucking chilly this morning,” he noted.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko rolled his shoulders and stretched, limbering up. “I think it feels good.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s mouth went dry. Must still be from sleep.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They paced, arms at the ready. They rarely sparred with swords now, after Sokka accidentally nicked Zuko and the guards overreacted. Better to keep the sharp blades out of the equation. Instead, they drew closer, until Zuko threw the first strike.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It became familiar, this dynamic. Sokka had learned which arm Zuko favored, and tried his best to exploit it, while Zuko tried his best to throw Sokka off his balance. They moved around each other fluidly, grappling with skin on skin. It felt good to get his blood pumping, breathing hard. Get some energy out after spending so much time lounging around. Sokka was landing a few strikes here and there, but this morning Zuko had the upper hand. Sokka stepped back, leaning out of the way, but then Zuko’s hand was gripping his bicep and wresting him around, and a leg tangled around another leg and —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s back hit the smooth stones of the courtyard roughly, knocking the breath out of him, and he was staring up at Zuko’s face in shock, close to his. Zuko looked surprised, too.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You got me,” Sokka panted. He was still out of breath. From the fall.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I did.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka swallowed, his heart leaping into his throat. He was acutely aware of Zuko’s skin so close to his, hovering over him with his arms on either side, propping himself up. Sokka had never noticed how warm Zuko was; he could feel the heat rolling off of the firebender, especially with the cool misty air around them. Zuko was breathing really hard. Sokka tried to slow his own breathing down. Why was his heart racing? He felt almost like he might vomit, it was beating so fast. He tried not to look at Zuko’s mouth. Why did his eyes keep moving of their own accord? They were not listening to Sokka.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko exhaled, pulling himself away and extending a hand to help Sokka up. Sokka took the hand gratefully, but let it go quickly, clenching his fist.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry,” Zuko offered, running his hand through his loose hair sheepishly. “I didn’t mean to knock you over.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“’S okay. You won fair and square this time,” Sokka said brusquely. “I’m gonna go wash up, okay? I’ll meet back up in a few.” He was hurrying away before he’d finished his sentence, waving behind him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s heart was still racing. That mouth… the image of it stuck in his brain like glue. Sokka’s chest felt tight. He’d never — he’d sparred with Aang plenty of times. Why did he feel — this was different, by a long shot. The pink flush in Zuko’s cheeks, so close to him, he could have just reached out and — no, no. Fuck that. No, not in that way! A cold bath, a cold bath was what Sokka needed. He felt a smile pull at the corner of his mouth. His own mouth, betraying him like that. Zuko’s eyes, the hair falling into them as he looked down at Sokka… it all came in quick succession in his mind’s eye, like flash bangs. His chest heaving with exertion, that <em>mouth</em> — a cold bath. Sokka needed a cold bath, and then he would feel all better.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko was alone in that courtyard before he knew quite <em>what</em> was happening, Sokka traipsing off to get ready for the day. Like nothing had happened. Had anything happened? Had he imagined that?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko sat down, still breathing hard. From the exercise, from the exercise. But how could he have imagined that? Sokka’s tongue, licking his fucking <em>lips</em>. Who did he think he was? There was no lying to himself any more, given the way Zuko’s trousers had tented. He hoped to the sun and moon Sokka hadn’t noticed. How unbearably awkward. Zuko felt his cheeks burn, violently hot against the morning air. He groaned, flopping back in the ground. Maybe the cold stones would calm his skin.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">If Zuko didn’t know any better, he would think that Sokka had done it on purpose. Collapsing there together, sweaty skin just next to each other. How could Zuko not be affected by that? He was just a man. He’d never looked at another boy that way… he didn’t know what was so different but somehow, some way, Sokka made his stomach turn. Zuko couldn’t stop thinking about it, Sokka’s wide blue eyes, mouth parted. Fuck.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He pulled on his tunic and hoped it covered his hard-on, at least enough to get to the bath without a servant noticing. He’d have to take care of it himself.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>where this fic is going is anyone's guess, really</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Clueless</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka makes some plans, but they all fall through.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>More of these boys being idiots. I promise the next chapter will have some return on investment.</p><p>A little discussion of the Fire Nation's homophobia and how Zuko has internalized it, but no slurs.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko was appalled to find he had to start… <em>taking care of himself</em> quite frequently. After he saw Sokka eat a sticky, iced treat, after their sparring sessions, after that late night they were poring over documents and Sokka noticed Zuko’s tense shoulders and started <em>massaging </em>them and… hell, Zuko even started dreaming about him. Especially that moment he was pinned under him. It was incessant, playing on a loop when he slept. What, was Zuko thirteen again? This was getting embarrassing.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had always been the plans guy, so he was usually the one to plan out their days off, and that day Sokka was determined to drag Zuko away from the palace. He’d picked Zuko’s favorite spot on the lip of the caldera, bringing dinner along with them for a picnic.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Screw him,” Sokka said, waving a hand. Zuko had been complaining about his Minister of Military, how he’d been dragging his heels on removing troops from the occupation efforts.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I wish I could just fire him,” Zuko sighed, finishing their climb up the inside of the caldera. He sometimes even came here alone; it was so peaceful in the evenings, and his worries stayed far away in the palace. Usually.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why not?” Sokka laid out a blanket for them and sat down, cross-legged.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“My legitimacy is hanging on by a thread as it is. If I make the nobles too angry with me, I’ll just get deposed. And it would all be for nothing.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Have you ever considered,” Sokka said, opening a small box of rice, “That those cranky old ministers are why you’re on such shaky ground?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko sat next to him, picking at his nails. “What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You know,” Sokka mumbled around a mouthful of rice, “the people of the Fire Nation didn’t like the war very much. The common people, at least.” He swallowed. “It was really only good business for the rich.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko looked up at him. He had never really thought about that — <em>I guess I really only spent time with the Earth Nation people.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You know that I’ve been out exploring the city. Some people still believe all that stuff about the Fire Nation being the best — but most of them are just happy to have their children back home,” Sokka pointed out. “Before you joined the group, we traveled through a fishing village. Their livelihood had been destroyed by a military factory. Katara and Aang ended up blowing it sky high, of course,” Sokka said with a slurp. He had moved on to some noodles.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That was very brave of them.” Zuko opened a box of grilled hippo-beef. “I suppose you miss her.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah. I wish we could visit more often. But I know she’s happy, being with Aang, so it’s okay.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They paused to eat. Zuko looked out over the horizon. He used to come here with Mai. It seemed like a lifetime ago, when he was pretending to be someone he wasn’t. <em>That wasn’t her fault</em>. He looked beside him, to Sokka with his mouth full of noodles. Zuko wished he could lean up against him, the way he could with Mai. His chest ached.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A strand of hair had fallen into Sokka’s face, and Sokka kept pushing it out of the way. Zuko wanted to reach out and tuck it behind his ear, but just ate his grilled hippo-beef instead.</span>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had been thinking. He’d had a lot of time to sit around and contemplate… <em>things</em>, lately. Which is why he’d planned their picnic.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He was an analytical guy, all about logic and reason, of course. Which is why, after a cold bath had failed to keep Zuko out of his head, he’d analyzed the situation to death. He’d mentally logged it all — how Sokka looked forward to the physicality of their sparring sessions together, how he couldn’t resist reaching out to rub Zuko’s shoulders — it wasn’t just the shoulder pieces, they really were quite broad — how deeply Zuko had blushed when Sokka licked the sweet, icy treat the Water Tribe vendors had started selling. It wasn’t Sokka’s intention when he bought the thing, it had been such a hot day and he missed his people’s sweets, but he sure played it up after he saw how Zuko reacted.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The evidence was in. There was no getting around it: Sokka wanted to kiss Zuko. In a <em>non-friend</em> way. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">But Sokka couldn’t quite figure out if Zuko wanted that, too. Had he been imagining it? The way Zuko leaned into him when he threw an arm around his shoulders? Sokka couldn’t be sure. After all, Sokka was a biased source. More evidence would need to be gathered to prove his theory; Sokka needed a <em>preponderance</em>. Thus, the picnic.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He figured, if Zuko did uhm, <em>feel the same way</em>, and if Sokka gave him enough opportunities, he would eventually act on it. Right?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka looked over at Zuko, who was staring off into the distance, brooding. He did so much of that. Was the romantic picnic spot not enough? Maybe it reminded him too much of Mai. Sokka had to distract him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka scooted closer to Zuko. Not too close, just gonna reach over and — Sokka snatched a piece of hippo-beef from the box on Zuko’s lap, pinching it between his chopsticks.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hey!” Zuko protested.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka grinned. “Sorry. I didn’t want to interrupt your brooding.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not brooding.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm, whatever you say.” Sokka chewed up the morsel and swallowed. “Thinking, brooding, either way, it’s cute.” <em>That</em> earned Sokka a blush.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m not <em>cute.</em>” Zuko ducked his head, long hair falling into his eyes. His ears turned pink.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mmm, whatever you say…” Was it too much? Sokka couldn’t find it in himself to stop. “I mean, compared to past Fire Lords, you’re definitely the cutest. In comparison to like, old men.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko huffed. “Fire Lords aren’t cute.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“First time for everything.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko’s face was turned away from Sokka, but his hands were picking at the hem of his robes. Sokka left him alone, waiting for him to say something. Maybe he just thought Sokka was trying to make fun of him. Which. He was, but he really did think Zuko’s brooding was cute. Either way, Zuko didn’t take the bait. Sokka would have to do some brainstorming.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The sun was deepening into orange, slanting through the balcony curtains and lighting up Zuko’s eyes. <em>Fuck off</em>, Sokka thought. <em>No one said you were allowed to be this pretty.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka produced the spoils of his latest shopping spree, a box of herbs hand-rolled into thin little tubes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“They’re from the Earth Kingdom, near Chameleon Bay,” Sokka said, opening the box. It was really quite pungent, smelling of pine and… lemons? He couldn’t tell.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko looked skeptical. He wrinkled his nose. “Okay. What are they for, a snack?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka chuckled, “No, silly, you smoke them. It’s called dama. Apparently it’s supposed to be very relaxing. Which, I figured you’d like, since you’re so stiff and tense all the time.” He reached out to rub Zuko’s knee.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko bit his lip. “I’m not sure.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Come on, you gotta let yourself have fun every so often.” Sokka nudged him with an elbow, and Zuko considered the herbs for a moment.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Okay, fine.” <em>Success.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko held one of the rolls gingerly and held up one finger, producing a tiny flame. He lit the end, which sputtered as the flame caught and ate up the wrapped paper. Zuko exclaimed and leaned back, blowing it out quickly.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“How are you even supposed to do this?” he complained. Discouraged already, this wouldn’t do.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka took the roll from him, laughing. “Here, let me try.” He held it up to his mouth and paused. “I’ll need you to light it, though.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka put the roll between his lips and watched as Zuko lit the end, breathing in to get the burn started. He caught Zuko’s eyes; Zuko looked surprised. Surprised at what, Sokka couldn’t tell. Sokka held the eye contact, for just a beat longer than would be strictly… platonic. He was jolted out of it when a coughing fit overtook him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, spirits,” Sokka managed to get out, while Zuko covered a laugh.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Are you okay?” he asked, touching Sokka’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, I’m fine,” he hacked out, “I think I just inhaled too much. Here, you try.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Their fingers brushed when Sokka passed it to him. Zuko grimaced as he took a tentative hit, letting out a tiny puff of smoke.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well don’t be shy,” Sokka prodded.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t want to hack up a lung like you,” he retorted, but took a deeper breath, coughing a little as he let it out. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They passed it back and forth between them, Zuko relighting when necessary. It was only halfway gone when Sokka felt his brain go all syrup-y.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm, I think I’m starting to feel it,” Sokka said, letting his eyes close as he took a hit. His eyelids just wanted a rest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Me too.” Zuko was leaning back in his chair now, limbs looser.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">By the time they finished, Sokka’s fingers were growing heavy and uncoordinated, and the wooden seat of the chair was getting uncomfortable. Zuko stood, taking a deep breath and running his hands through his hair. How had Sokka never noticed how soft his hair looked?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Alright, I admit it, I do feel more relaxed,” Zuko said, lying down on a lounge and letting an arm flop onto the pillows.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m always right.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka got up from his wooden chair. Should he sit with Zuko? <em>Fuck it.</em> He settled next to Zuko’s head, leaning back into the plush couch. Much better than that damned chair. Sokka was hyper-aware of the texture of his clothes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The sun had set and neither had lit any lamps yet, but Sokka didn’t want to get up. Zuko looked up at him and it’s all Sokka could see. He was glad Zuko was feeling better, his brow relaxed instead of permanently furrowed. He said as much, and Zuko smiled softly, his eyes closing. He seemed sleepy.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka wanted to reach out, to lean down and kiss him, but his heart took off racing when he thought about it. What if Zuko hated him for it? What if he didn’t? No, he couldn’t. Sokka started to play with Zuko’s strands of hair, instead. He could pass that off as friendly, right? Sokka watched Zuko, apprehensive of his reaction, but Zuko’s eyes didn’t fly open. He just sighed, so Sokka ran his fingers against his scalp, scratching lightly. And <em>that</em>, well, Zuko almost outright purred at that, head falling against Sokka’s hand and opening his eyes. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That feels nice,” Zuko murmured, voice small like he was admitting a secret. Sokka couldn’t really see in the low light, but he could swear Zuko’s cheeks were flushing red. Sokka’s heartbeat wasn’t slowing down any time soon.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hm, I should keep going then?” Sokka said, barely keeping it together. <em>This is a disaster</em>.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko hummed his <em>yes</em>, legs shifting to get more comfortable. His hair was even softer than it looked, delightful to comb his fingers through. And Sokka loved seeing Zuko so happy, loved that it was his touch that Zuko liked so much. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think the situation in the Earth Kingdom has been improving,” Zuko said, eyes still closed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm.” Sokka liked Zuko’s voice, he decided. <em>Especially like this, all soft and raspy.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Aang said the colonists are getting used to the idea of Earth Kingdom sovereignty, and the Earth officials are making some compromises. Honestly it’s turning out better than I thought. I don’t know what I could do if Aang wasn’t helping…” Zuko rambled on, and Sokka just listened. The young Fire Lord always had a lot to talk about, and Sokka was happy to just be there, even if he felt a bit useless sometimes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They stayed that way until the room was so dark they could barely see, the light was so dim, and Zuko got up to light the lanterns. Sokka missed the touch more than he thought he would, thinking about it later that night when he was alone, in his own room, trying to go to sleep.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They had just left a foreign policy meeting when Sokka finally blurted it out.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Have you ever thought about boys?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka regretted it immediately, but tried to play it off casually, leaning against a massive stone pillar.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko looked well and truly confused. “Like, in general?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Uhm,” Sokka ran a hand against the back of his neck, “I mean, like girls. In not-friend way.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“As in enemies?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No! I mean,” Sokka huffed. <em>Damn.</em> “Like in a romantic way.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh,” Zuko’s mouth fell open in surprise. “I don’t know…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s stomach fell right through his feet and down into the catacombs beneath the palace.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Just curious,” Sokka said nonchalantly, starting to walk back toward the residences. Zuko cleared his throat, and Sokka turned back around.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I mean…” Zuko’s face was the color of his formal robes. “Maybe?” Sokka’s stomach was now in his throat. Zuko looked nervous, glancing around to spot any servants lurking within earshot. He leaned in closer to Sokka. “I just, can we go to the gardens?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka let Zuko lead him there, to a secluded corner where their voices were cloaked by the rushing of a small stream. They sat on a stone bench, and Zuko’s fingers busied themselves with a tassel on his robes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I, uhm. I didn’t expect you to ask me that.” Zuko wasn’t looking at him. Why wouldn’t he look at him?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well, you know, I just thought I’d ask, you never know really. Because, like, you’re my friend, and you haven’t really mentioned girls lately and I thought that maybe you like boys and since you’re my friend I should probably know that and it’s really not a big deal and —” Sokka could feel himself rambling, but he couldn’t stop once he started.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sokka. Sokka!” Sokka stopped. Zuko was looking straight at him now. “I get it.” He turned his eyes to the tassel again, worrying at it with his fingers. “I… I have. Thought about boys.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Now it felt like Sokka couldn’t speak even if he wanted to. He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but Zuko beat him to it.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t know. I didn’t used to. Or, maybe I did… and I just didn’t realize it. But, I think about girls… it’s confusing.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You do?” Zuko looked to Sokka, eyes lit up. <em>Holy shit</em>.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, well. You know. I think I might have, too.” <em>Understatement of the century. </em>“It is confusing.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah. I just never thought — my father always said that I would have to find a woman to bear the royal line, that men being with men was unnatural.” Zuko’s fingers were going to tear that tassel apart. “That it was disgusting.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Your father’s a piece of shit,” Sokka spat.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I <em>know </em>that, but it’s… when I was little, one of the noblemen got caught with a servant. I was so young, I never heard what happened to them, but — I didn’t see the nobleman around after that.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka placed a tentative hand over Zuko’s, stilling his fingers. Zuko sighed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know my father is wrong, so why do I still — I still feel… dirty.” He said the last word in almost a whisper.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka didn’t know what to say. Dirty… growing up, their village had been so small, he’d only ever seen Anek and Kyi, the two sweet old aunties who’d never married, but built a home together. They always brought the best five-flavor soup to holiday feasts. Who would ever see them and say it was disgusting?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well…” Sokka started. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing. “It’s hard, being raised by a man like Ozai.” Zuko’s mouth pursed. Sokka continued, “Like, sometimes you still feel like you’re not a commanding enough Fire Lord, right?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah,” Zuko mumbled.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Like you’re not mean enough.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I guess. Not <em>mean</em>, but yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think that maybe, like how it’s taking time for you to adjust to ruling differently, it’s going to take you some time to feel differently about this part of you.” Sokka said slowly, thinking through his words. He squeezed Zuko’s hand.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That makes sense.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They stood, and Sokka wrapped Zuko up in a hug. “You just have to give it some time, buddy.” Zuko was teary when he pulled back, and Sokka made sure to hug him again before parting for the night, giving him some space in his quarters. It was only when Sokka was in his room that he thought — palm smacking his forehead — <em>should he have made his damn move?</em></span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had one more plan. A last-ditch effort to see if Zuko felt the same way. It was the last bullet point on his brainstorming list, which he kept stuffed in a drawer in his room where Zuko would never see it. Sokka was firing up the old war balloon.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Most of the military’s war balloons and airships had been destroyed during the comet or retired, but Sokka had managed to convince the grizzled old homeland admiral to let him and Zuko take one for a spin. Sokka realized how much he missed flying when they lifted up, Zuko sending fire blasts into the furnace. Being up in the sky, untethered, felt exhilarating. <em>Aang’s lucky, he can just take off whenever he wants</em>. Sokka wanted to keep going, to steer the two of them away from the palace and across the sea. It didn’t matter where they’d go, as long as he had Zuko along with him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The city flowed beneath them, people going about their business and skittering through the streets like ants. The trees fell out from under them as they rose, leaves shivering in the wind, and the noise of civilization faded to leave only the rushing of wind.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“So where are we taking this thing?” Zuko asked, sending another puff of flame into the furnace.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Nowhere in particular. I just thought it’d be fun. Like old times.” Sokka rested his hands on the rim of the balloon’s basket, looking out into the volcanic mountains that surrounded the Fire Nation capital.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Old times,” Zuko muttered, absentmindedly. “Before everything got complicated.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What do you mean?” Sokka asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, nothing.” Zuko seemed a little flustered. “Just, uh… being Fire Lord. You know how it is.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sure.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Do you miss it? Old times?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I guess.” Sokka sat, pushing away a stray hair that blew into his face. “I miss all of us being together, all of our friends being able to spend time with each other.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, I miss them too.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They were quiet for a while. Sokka enjoyed it, just being together with nothing to bother them. They drifted west, toward the forested mountains.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t miss you,” Zuko said, out of the blue.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well yeah, Captain Obvious. I’m right here,” Sokka laughed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know.” Zuko was brooding again, Sokka noticed. “It’s been nice.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What, me bothering you for a month?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“So you admit that I’m a nuisance,” Sokka teased, the corner of his mouth quirking up.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You haven’t been a <em>nuisance</em>.” Zuko’s eyes were intense. “You’ve been… a welcome distraction.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s my specialty.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Being distracting? Kind of, yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka wasn’t sure if he was reading him correctly. Was he…? No. Sokka was imagining things.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well, call me whenever you need me to be the comic relief,” he laughed nervously. His mouth was very dry, and his lips felt chapped against the brisk air. Sokka felt short of breath — must be the altitude. Zuko moved closer, almost… hesitant? </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re not just comic relief,” Zuko muttered. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Well, you’re right about that. I’m the meat and sarcasm guy, remember?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, meat.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka almost choked. What was <em>that?</em> Sokka needed to get his mind out of the gutter. Was Zuko <em>smirking?</em> No, that would be ridiculous. Sokka’s knee was bouncing restlessly.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko leaned back. “This was a good idea, taking us up here, alone.” He looked at Sokka expectantly.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Thanks, ideas are really all I’ve got, you know,” Sokka felt Zuko’s eyes on him like he was under a microscope. <em>Can he tell? Does he know? He couldn’t know. Could he?</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Come on, that’s not <em>all</em> you’ve got,” Zuko said, tilting his head.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I mean. I’ve got some jokes, too.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“The girls like that about you.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I guess.” Sokka could swear he was imagining Zuko shifting closer. He felt like he was going to hyperventilate.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko turned to the edge of the basket, looking at his hands.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I like your jokes, too.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s stomach rolled over. “Thanks, man.” <em>Man? Am I dense?</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko was quiet for a bit, and Sokka was kicking himself. <em>“Man”. Could I plant my foot any further in my mouth? </em>Sokka pulled himself together enough to say something through his dry throat and clumsy tongue.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m glad you like my jokes.” <em>Evidently, yes I can. What if I just went for it — no, what if he’s grossed out — </em>Zuko smiled. <em>Fuck.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I mean, you’re a funny guy.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Thanks —” They were coming back around to the palace grounds. “— we’re almost back.” <em>Shit, shit, fuck —</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hm. I guess I’d better bring us down,” Zuko said. <em>Is he disappointed?</em> Sokka couldn’t tell. He was so hard to read sometimes; why did he have to be hard to read <em>now</em>, of all times?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They landed and clambered out of the balloon, Sokka’s cheeks burning. <em>Another disaster. </em>Sokka had to excuse himself to his room, groaning and flopping down on the bed. He buried his head in a pillow and yelled. <em>No wonder that didn’t work for Aang. I don’t feel better at all.</em></span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I that that it's established (in the comics? I haven't read them all) that the Water Tribe is homophobic, but given that in the show the North had betrothal necklaces and sexist policies on female waterbenders, while the South didn't have necklaces and we see Hama fighting in flashbacks, AND that I cannot see Hakoda being a bigot, I personally headcanon that it's really only the NWT on that "traditional values" shit. I much prefer Sokka growing up with lesbian aunties, thanks.</p><p>Comments are my lifeblood.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Kissing Zuko</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko reaches his breaking point.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I may be a lot of things, but at least I can promise that I will never call anyone's eyes "orbs". Or "pools".</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No, see, here and here,” Sokka said, pointing to two peninsulas on the map, “those were from the second wave of conquests. At the time, they weren’t even under centralized Earth Kingdom control, and hadn’t been for a long time, so when the colonists appropriated…” Zuko wasn’t following very well. He was drowsy, and they’d been at this for hours, trying to figure out separate plans for different colonies. It seemed like each one had layers of intricacies to the situation, and Zuko couldn’t keep them all straight. Which is why he’d written to Sokka in the first place; Sokka thrived on this.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">How fateful, that letter had been. Just a month or so ago, Zuko had spent these long nights alone, and now here he was, pining over Sokka like a lovestruck polar bear puppy. Thinking back, he wasn’t sure when it had all changed. Sure, he’d <em>realized</em> it that morning he’d fallen onto Sokka, but now that he knew… was it the day at the beach? Seeing him in the water? Before that? At the Boiling Rock, fighting so close alongside him? Zuko couldn’t be sure.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He knew one thing for sure — thinking of that ballon ride made him want to ram his forehead into a stone wall. Zuko let himself hope that maybe, <em>maybe</em> Sokka felt the same way… but then Zuko had put himself out there, embarrassed himself with those clumsy come-ons. <em>Could I have been any more blatant?</em> It had all been perfect, the two of them floating, alone — far from all their problems, the mountains and the cool breeze, and Sokka had confirmed his worst fears. <em>“Thanks, man.” Buddy, pal, friend. Sokka was just an affectionate friend, no need to read too much into it and embarrass myself even further — plenty of guys are affectionate with their friends.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">But that didn’t mean Zuko didn’t catch himself fantasizing, thinking about <em>what if I’d kissed him, and he’d liked it, and he’d put his arms around my neck and I’d held him up there and —</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Does that make sense?” Sokka was looking at him inquisitively. Oops.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, yeah, yeah.” Zuko tried to pretend like he hadn’t been staring at Sokka’s hands. He’d started wearing a few rings he’d picked up at the market. Zuko had noticed Sokka liked shiny things, like a magpie-raccoon.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka sighed. “Are you even listening?” Zuko smiled sheepishly. Sokka stood, moving to Zuko’s side of the desk and placing a hand on his shoulder. He bent down, pointing again to the colonies he’d been talking about. Sokka was close behind him, and Zuko could just barely feel Sokka’s breath on his ear, sending goosebumps prickling down his neck.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s easier to understand when you remember the contexts,” Sokka continued. “These areas have plenty of natural resources, so it was essential to get a foothold…”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko really was not going to be able to focus with Sokka so close to him. He was acutely aware of Sokka’s fingers pressing into his shoulder, and how if he just turned —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka’s hand squeezed. “You’re not paying attention, Zuzu,” he sing-songed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry, I just — it’s been a long day,” Zuko mumbled, turning his head to Sokka. Sokka’s palm moved to the back of Zuko’s neck, and <em>oh no</em>, he was right there, within kissing distance. Did he know how frustrating he was?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko thought about it for a beat. He should just do it, get it over with, rip the bandage off — then he’d know for sure. He could stop torturing himself with the what-ifs. Sokka’s fingers rubbed a light circle in the skin at the nape of Zuko’s neck. He could swear Sokka was doing it on purpose… waiting for something?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Is something distracting you?” Sokka said quietly. Was he just concerned?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko’s mouth was dry as the Si Wong Desert. Sokka’s other hand found Zuko’s, resting on the papers beside them, and Zuko’s fingers tangled in Sokka’s.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Just, uhm… ‘m just tired,” Zuko croaked. He couldn’t… if Sokka had wanted something, he would have told him, right? </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Okay.” Sokka pulled away slightly. “Let’s call it a day, then.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko had to take care of himself <em>again </em>that night. When he’d finished, he laid in bed, staring up at the red curtains, thoughts racing from one extreme to another. All the small touches, Sokka calling him <em>cute</em>, Sokka running away after he’d fallen on him, those fingers running through his hair, how shameful he felt thinking about Sokka while jacking off. It curled inside him, like a wounded tiger-monkey.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"><em>Something</em> had to give. The last time Zuko had felt anything like this was in Ba Sing Se. Whenever he thought about Sokka, he felt feverish, cold-sweating and sticky, mind unable to settle down on any one thought. Not nearly as bad, but. The situation was unsustainable.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It was decided, then. He had to rip the bandage off, come what may.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Moon and <em>stars</em>, it was hot. Sokka wiped at the sweat beading up on his brow. The trees shading the courtyard helped, but Zuko was putting him through his paces, so Sokka was sweating all the same. He caught a few labored breaths, then leapt back into the fray.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Skin connected with skin, Zuko’s arm blocking him. It didn’t matter that it was hot, as long as Sokka got to be so close to him. Sokka turned around Zuko, striking at a different point each time. Zuko thrust forward, and Sokka curled a hand around his forearm, letting Zuko fall past him. Zuko wasted no time kicking out, trying to knock Sokka’s legs out from under him, but Sokka was too quick, dancing out of the way. Zuko let out a growl of frustration — Sokka couldn’t let <em>that</em> get to him. Zuko struck again, trying to get a hold on him. He’d had Sokka mostly on the defense all morning, slipping just out of his grasp. Sokka was grinning; he loved how frustrated Zuko got. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko struck at his shoulder and Sokka feinted to the side, but Zuko was already turning to grab his torso, wrestling the both of them to the ground. Sokka wriggled in his grip, rolling the both of them over. He planted a knee on either side of Zuko’s hips, pinning him. Zuko struggled, hands pushing against Sokka’s ribs for a weak moment before stilling, breathing hard.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Fuck off, Sokka,” he growled. Sokka was triumphant, grinning.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I win. Again.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Rematch! You got lucky. Asshole.” Zuko balled a fist against Sokka’s bare chest. Zuko’s lips curled up in a snarl.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I don’t think so. I won, fair and square,” Sokka whispered, leaning down to needle Zuko, get him more riled up. He just couldn’t resist. And Sokka felt like he was entitled to a little gloating, after all Zuko had put him through. Keeping him up at night.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll wipe that grin off your face,” Zuko panted. Sokka couldn’t look anywhere but Zuko’s mouth, it was too pretty. If only he could kiss it… but Sokka couldn’t chance it, couldn’t chance Zuko rejecting him. He’d have to settle for teasing him, instead. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, will you? Given that <em>I </em>won and <em>you</em> lost, I don’t think you will, your princeliness —” and then Zuko’s lips were on his, and Sokka’s brain stuttered.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It felt like a hallucination, at first, delirious. But Zuko’s mouth was moving against his, and Sokka’s brain had to come back online. He fell into it, and it was <em>aggressive</em>, how Zuko was kissing him; open-mouthed, their heads tilting to find the right angles. Sokka felt high, his brain going all syrup-y again. There was nothing in the world but Zuko’s mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">But then, there <em>was </em>something suddenly, when Zuko’s hands splayed out across Sokka’s chest and coasted up to curl around the back of his neck, pulling down in a suggestion. Sokka took the suggestion — he’d been hovering over Zuko, but at Zuko’s insisting hands he lowered himself, body leaning down. He earned a moan from Zuko, and he knew he wanted more of <em>that</em>, at the very least, feeling the moan vibrate against his own chest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It was different, kissing Zuko. Not <em>so</em> different, but Zuko was kissing him like he was starving, and he had never felt someone else’s stubble on his cheeks before. It was a little rough, but he kind of liked the gentle scrape. Zuko’s teeth pulled gently on Sokka’s lower lip, and Sokka couldn’t help but roll his hips at that. He was only human. Zuko’s fingers pulled at Sokka’s wolftail, tugging the tie off. Sokka felt the strands fall around his face, into his eyes. Then Zuko was tangling his fingers in the hair at the back of Sokka’s neck, and Sokka was snaking his tongue out to run along the sharp line of Zuko’s teeth, and Zuko tugged on Sokka’s hair and <em>that</em> pulled a groan from Sokka before he could catch it.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The kiss, Zuko’s hands, the feeling of Zuko’s body fucking <em>writhing</em> against Sokka’s — it had Sokka lightheaded, and Sokka knew he was rapidly hardening, pressed against Zuko’s leg through his thin trousers. Sokka pulled his hips back, breaking the kiss to lean his forehead into Zuko’s neck, near gasping.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Damn it. Sorry,” Sokka managed to get out.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m just — <em>stars</em>,” Sokka swore. His heart was beginning to slow, but only just.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Sorry for this?” Zuko hummed, right into his ear, palming Sokka through his trousers. Sokka’s hips leaned into the touch of their own accord.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah,” Sokka breathed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t be.” It rumbled in Zuko’s chest, Sokka couldn’t help opening his mouth to kiss Zuko’s neck, slightly salty with a light sheen of sweat.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ah, but —” Sokka loved the gasps Zuko was making in response to his tongue, “maybe, mm, maybe not in the courtyard —” he groaned. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka stopped, pulling off of Zuko, and Zuko heaved right up, grabbing Sokka’s hand and pulling them into a jog across the stones. It was almost like a dream, following along behind him. When had it gotten like this? Had Sokka drank some cactus juice accidentally? </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They passed through a dense, leafy area of the gardens, and Sokka stopped, pulling Zuko back and tucking them into a corner, trees arching around them. He had to make sure Zuko was still there, that he wasn’t losing his mind. He cupped Zuko’s face to his, all tongues and teeth. He could feel Zuko’s breath on his face, hot and labored.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Not <em>here</em>,” Zuko protested, half-laughing, dragging Sokka behind him again. What? Sokka was an impatient guy.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The scrambled up the balcony stairs, Zuko turning to slam the doors shut. Sokka pushed him up against the carved wood, mouth on his neck again. He wanted to hear those damned sounds again.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko’s hands returned to Sokka’s hair, curling against his scalp. Sokka let his teeth brush against the skin of Zuko’s shoulder experimentally, and when Zuko sighed Sokka dug his teeth in lightly, earning another moan. It surprised Sokka, how those sounds set Sokka’s skin tingling.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka let Zuko push the both of them away from the door, hands hanging on tightly to Zuko’s hips. His mouth had left Zuko’s neck and he caught Zuko’s eyes — lidded, dark, determined. Sokka’s heart thrummed in his throat, and let Zuko walk the both of them over to the bed. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You want this?” Sokka breathed, afraid if he said too much he’d shatter the dream. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re a fucking idiot,” Zuko moaned into another open-mouthed kiss, and Sokka fell back, pulling Zuko down onto the bed with him. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka smiled against Zuko’s lips. It was sloppy, really — Sokka couldn’t focus on any one point of contact with Zuko, couldn’t do anything but what felt good, and that was getting as much skin on Zuko’s as possible. <em>Stars</em>, how did he smell so delicious, even after sweating outside? That campfire smell. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He rolled them over, pinning Zuko down to the bed, just like in the courtyard. Less rough on his knees. This time, Sokka didn’t hesitate to lean his body into Zuko’s, fingers brushing Zuko’s ear. Those hands — Zuko’s hands were all over again, nails curling against the skin of Sokka’s back. Zuko’s hips tilted up, and Sokka let himself grind down against him. Zuko broke the kiss to gasp. <em>Too much?</em> Sokka caught Zuko’s eyes again, hips stilling. Then, curse Zuko, because he was barely letting Sokka catch his breath before clutching his hands to Sokka’s hips and guiding them down.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Fuck,” Zuko whined, and now that Sokka was looking at him he didn’t want to stop — those eyelashes fluttering, his cheeks flushed high and red, his brow pinching. Sokka didn’t know what to do. How far did Zuko want to take this? Was he overwhelmed? Sokka felt a little overwhelmed, but it was such a <em>good</em> overwhelming, but maybe Zuko needed a breather —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Will you…” Zuko’s hands were skittering across Sokka’s back, “will you touch me?” he whispered, burying his face in the crook of Sokka’s neck. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, yeah,” Sokka couldn’t get the words out fast enough. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You don’t have to,” Zuko said softly, even as Sokka’s hands were flying to Zuko’s hips, thumb tucking under his waistband.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No, no — no, I want to. Fuck, I really want to,” the words were tumbling out of Sokka’s mouth, a confession. “Want you so damn bad.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko shut his eyes at that, a small whine escaping him. Sokka was going to do whatever it took to get more of those whines out of him. He cupped gently at Zuko through the trousers, heart slamming against his sternum. He’d never… never felt another guy’s cock before, and Sokka suddenly remembered he really had no idea what he was doing. Kissing boys turned out to be a lot like kissing girls, but this was — this was entirely uncharted territory. <em>What if I’m bad?</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">No turning back, though, not when Zuko was looking at him like that, like he might pass out. So Sokka pulled the waistband down, and then his hand was wrapping around Zuko and <em>oh, that’s different</em>. He’d felt his own cock, of course, but another person — the angle of his hand was all different, and he couldn’t feel what he was doing. Sokka ran his fingers over it, worried he’d do something wrong too quickly. He didn’t know what that could be, but who knows? He didn’t know what Zuko liked. Sokka ran his thumb over the head, smearing a small bead of precum. Zuko moaned into Sokka’s ear.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Tell me what feels good,” Sokka said, wrapping his hand around the shaft and tugging softly. As long as he had directions, he could make this work.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mmph, I don’t know, just — <em>more</em>,” Zuko gasped, hips tilting up. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka knew that he definitely didn’t have nearly enough lubrication. Sokka pulled away, and spat into his hand.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko chuckled, breathless. “There’s lotion. In the dresser.” Zuko propped himself up on his elbows, gesturing across the room. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka leapt for it, rooting through the drawers. <em>Is this it?</em> He pulled out a jar, shoved into the back of a drawer of sashes.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“That’s the one,” Zuko confirmed, laughing when Sokka pounced on him again. “You’re eager.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re one to talk,” Sokka said, voice gravelly. Zuko flushed, the dark pink bright on his pale skin. Sokka slathered his hand and worked the lotion over Zuko’s cock, and just that touch made Zuko’s head fall back, mouth parted, letting out a little gasp. He was so much more vocal than Sokka thought he’d be. He was usually so quiet —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please, yes,” Zuko breathed. Not so quiet now.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka settled in, leg slung over one of Zuko’s, hand working him over and lips at Zuko’s ear. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Feel good?” Sokka asked softly. Fuck, he hoped so.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yes, yes, fuck — please, <em>more</em>, Sokka,” Zuko was rolling his hips slightly, little grunts escaping. Sokka’s own cock strained at the fabric of his trousers, but he could bother with that later. For now, he got to see Zuko’s eyes rolling back in his head, gasping when Sokka got just the right twist of his wrist. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please, please, Sokka,” Zuko’s voice was high and desperate. Stars, Zuko was <em>begging</em>.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What do you want me to do?” Sokka watched Zuko’s face, eyelids fluttering and mouth parted, choked gasps escaping. <em>Gorgeous</em>, the word popped into Sokka’s head.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please, I just — I’m gonna —” and just like that, Zuko was coming on his stomach and Sokka’s hand was sticky with it. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, stroking Zuko through it. He looked even better, laying there before him, than those filthy dreams Sokka had woken up from sweating. Before Sokka knew what he was doing or why, he put his sticky fingers in his mouth. He was curious, and besides, when Zuko saw that he let out a deliciously choked whimper. It tasted salty, had a tang — a little bitter. Not that bad.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Fucking —” Zuko covered his face in his hands. “You’re too much.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka grinned at that. “What, this does it for you?” he teased, making a show of licking the rest of it off. When his hand was clean he put his mouth on Zuko’s stomach, kissing and licking until there was nothing left. He didn’t enjoy the taste <em>that</em> much — it was still odd, and new — but what he did enjoy was the way Zuko writhed underneath him with each pass of his tongue.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He pulled Sokka into a kiss, tongue licking into his mouth. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Tastes weird,” Zuko said into the kiss.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know, right?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shut up.” He grabbed at Sokka’s crotch. “I suppose I should repay the favor?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mmnh, only if you want to,” Sokka said, body beginning to move against Zuko’s.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You really are an idiot,” Zuko said, pushing Sokka over onto his back and settling between his legs. He worked Sokka’s trousers down. Sokka felt a flash of vulnerability — he hoped he wasn’t… disappointing.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why am I such an idiot?” Sokka was breathless, hand clutching at the sheets. He needed something, anything to hold on to. Seeing Zuko run the lotion over his hand —</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Because, idiot,” Zuko retorted, long fingers wrapping around his shaft, “I’ve wanted to get into your pants for weeks.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka shut his eyes when Zuko started stroking, slowly at first, getting a feel for the rhythm. <em>Had he done this before?</em> Wait, that wouldn’t make sense. He’d only just come out to Sokka…</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Weeks?” Sokka managed to get out. <em>So it hadn’t been all in my head. </em>Zuko’s free hand was gripping Sokka’s hip, pushing gently back when they bucked into his touch.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yes. Are you really that oblivious?” Zuko’s voice was low and soft, and now his hand was picking up speed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I guess so,” Sokka was trying not to reveal how close he already was. He knew he was failing. He didn’t want this to be over that quickly. “Slower,” he breathed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko obliged, watching Sokka carefully. “Like this?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka nodded, swallowing. “Was too close.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko’s eyebrow arched. “Too close?” He grinned wolfishly. “Already.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shut <em>up</em>.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Do you really want me to?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yes. No. I don’t know,” Sokka couldn’t concentrate on anything other than Zuko’s slick fingers.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Tell me what you want and I’ll do it,” Zuko said, “anything.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shi-it. Ah, faster again.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko followed through on his promise, and Sokka could feel him watching as he edged closer. Before long Sokka was spilling over his hand, choking out a cry.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’ll get something to clean you up,” Zuko said quickly, getting up from the bed. He chose a handtowel to ruin, dampening it in the washbasin at the side of the room. The mattress dipped as he sat beside Sokka, still laid out across the sheets, feeling awkwardly sticky.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko cleaned him gingerly, the handtowel cool on his hot skin. Sokka looked up at him; Zuko was blushing deeply, looking embarrassed, not meeting his gaze. Sokka reached a hand out to touch Zuko’s elbow, and Zuko’s eyes jumped to his and then away again.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Thanks,” Sokka said, wrapping his hand lightly around Zuko’s bicep.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No problem.” Zuko was mumbling. He continued running the cloth over Sokka’s skin.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I think I’m all clean now.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh — yeah.” Zuko crumpled up the cloth, leaving it at the side of the bed. He folded his hands in his lap, looking away. Sokka pulled his trousers up again and sat up against the pillows. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hey.” Sokka placed a hand over Zuko’s. “What is it?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Nothing.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka looked at him skeptically. Didn’t seem like that, but maybe it was best to leave it alone.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Come here,” Sokka said, pulling Zuko into him. He curled a hand around Zuko’s jaw, giving him a soft kiss, much less urgent than the others. They shifted awkwardly, Zuko turning his body to fit alongside Sokka’s, and Sokka took the opportunity to settle his arm around Zuko’s shoulders. It turns out, Zuko’s head fit perfectly in the dip between Sokka’ chest and his shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko’s fingers fiddled with themselves. <em>So agitated.</em> Sokka threaded his fingers through Zuko’s hair, scratching softly at his scalp. <em>He liked that before.</em> Zuko’s fingers stilled.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka wasn’t sure how to break the silence. “I liked that,” he offered. <em>Rough start.</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Me too.” Zuko’s voice was stilted. “Is this —” He stopped, huffing. “Did you think about this, too?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Like, before?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Mm-hmm.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko was quiet again for a while. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I had never really, uh, done stuff. With a guy. Before,” Sokka offered again. The silence was too much, too heavy to let sit for long.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Me neither.” For how vocal he was before, Zuko had really clammed up. Sokka kept combing through Zuko’s hair, a little damp at the hairline from sweat.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I thought about it a lot, though, you know. About you,” Sokka admitted. Zuko hummed. “Had you really been trying to get into my pants for weeks?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka got a disgruntled nudge for that. “Shut up.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I mean, I’m flattered,” Sokka teased. “It’s just, why didn't you go for it sooner?” He scratched at the nape of Zuko’s neck.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I… I was worried.” He seemed embarrassed, like it was like a confession. “That you wouldn’t feel the same.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I was, too.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I thought about it, making a move. I just wasn’t sure… I didn’t want to lose our friendship.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’re not gonna.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Good.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Besides, now that Minister Chao is warming up to you, I need to keep you around to stay on his good side.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka ruffled Zuko’s hair with a little laugh.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka had to hold back from stealing a kiss before the meeting. Zuko always looked so official and handsome in his formal robes, but he couldn’t. Not in front of the ministers, not yet.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The council room was filled with the murmurings of officials talking amongst themselves, shuffling around to get settled. The vast map table was spread out in front of them, little wooden figurines marking the locations of troops and official trading vessels. The map was quickly becoming outdated. Sokka noticed a little corner of the Earth Kingdom, messy with brushstrokes. It was in the middle of being repainted, following the recent withdrawal of a fledgeling colony.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Zuko had taken his place at the head of the table, shoulders stiff. Sokka watched him, hoping to catch his eye, but Zuko was distracted by a comment from the Minister of Trade to his left. The meeting started, with the Minister of Trade bringing up the drop in food product imports since the dismantling of the newest colonies. He was disgruntled. Sokka stopped himself from rolling his eyes; he found that he had to bite his tongue frequently in these meetings. Was a little less variety on your dinner plate really so bad if it meant dismantling those revolting colonies? Apparently, Minister Chao thought so. Sokka liked the old man well enough when he wasn’t prattling on about the Fire Nation’s “glorious” past, but Sokka was <em>so</em> close to telling him just what he really thought of that <em>glorious past</em>. Still, he held his tongue for diplomacy’s sake.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka chimed in to offer a few comments about the comparable efficiencies of two southern trade routes, one through the old Southern Air territory and one nearer to Kyoshi Island. Sokka wondered if any of them were really <em>listening</em> to him, honestly; a few, like Chao, always looked to him with curiosity and attention, but a fair portion of the councilmembers still seemed to brush his comments off. <em>Is it because I’m young, or because I’m Water Tribe? Or because I’m a commoner? </em>He didn’t think he’d ever really know for sure.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Sokka looked to Zuko again, watching for his reaction to Sokka’s advice. Zuko’s mouth was pressed in his resolute, Fire Lording way, so Sokka smiled — just a little. Zuko’s eyes flicked away from his quickly, back down to the map. Sokka’s smile fell. Was that — what was that?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The rest of the meeting, Sokka kept trying, sending little smiles and looks Zuko’s way, and receiving nothing in return. <em>I’m reading to much into it, </em>Sokka told himself… but then again, they hadn’t talked about <em>it</em> since leaving Zuko’s bed. <em>Did he —</em> Sokka almost didn’t let himself think it. <em>Does he regret it?</em></span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So, I hoped you enjoyed the explicit bits! They're informed by my first experiences with people of the same gender, but I'm a lady so if you have some advice for me in how to depict two guys together more accurately, it is more than welcome.</p><p>I've loved all the comments so far, each one makes my day :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Sleepless in Caldera City</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A little miscommunication, for spice.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>More vague economic discussions. I'm just writing stuff that sounds good to me. Maybe I should have sat in on an econ class in college.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Zuko was trying his absolute best to listen to what Minister Chao was saying, animated, chatting away at Zuko’s side, but his best wasn’t enough. The memory of Sokka’s face, gasping, crying out — <em>Focus.</em></p>
<p class="p1">It was an important meeting. Minister Chao was delineating the nobles’ grievances, which Zuko had spent so many exhausting hours playing catch-up with.</p>
<p class="p1">“I know Your Royal Highness is a man with many worries,” he said, words sickly sweet, falling over each other in deference. “But many of the nobles, my lord, they complain of their quality of life. Perhaps you may be able to fit, ah, repaying their loyalty, as they have said, not myself of course, into your plans. In the future, my lord.” The old man’s hands tensed nervously, folded on the table.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko steeled his face. Some loyalty theirs was, conditional upon the availability of their sweet treats.</p>
<p class="p1">“Minister Chao, I appreciate… your honest communication with me.” Zuko hoped his irritation wasn’t seeping through. He paused, choosing his words carefully. “I… understand the importance of the aristocracy’s support. Their support… hasn’t, ah, gone unnoticed.” The minister relaxed.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko honestly couldn’t be bothered to entertain the whining, at least not when Sokka was <em>right there</em> down the table and catching his eye, mischievous smile curling at the corners of his mouth.</p>
<p class="p1">“We have a lot to get through for now, Minister, so let’s note the subject in next meeting’s agenda,” Zuko said, gesturing to the young scribe seated to the side of the table. She was young, younger by Zuko by just a few years, it looked like.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko addressed the scribe, “Uhm, thank you. Your name, ma’am?” She, and all the ministers, looked surprised. Sokka didn’t seem to notice the change in the room.</p>
<p class="p1">“Oh —” she stuttered for a moment, “Uzuli, my lord.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Thank you Uzuli. What is our next order of business?”</p>
<p class="p1">She looked dazed as her eyes turned to the agenda in front of her. “Um, amending our southern trade routes. Your Highness,” she added quickly.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko led the meeting on, past the tense energy that hung in the air. The ministers bickered, debating whether the costs of changing the course of their southern trade routes was worth adding additional ports of call. Zuko found it easy to tune out, and then his mind was on Sokka again. He tried not to look at him. Sokka always looked so comfortable at these things, body relaxed in his chair. <em>Meanwhile, I couldn’t relax if I tried. Not like earlier —</em> not like when Zuko’s head was lolling back, Sokka’s breath hot and Zuko’s skin goosebumping all over, Sokka’s hand wrapped around — <em>Focus!</em></p>
<p class="p1">Zuko tried to focus on just looking pensively at the map. <em>Just gotta get through this damn meeting. </em>He couldn’t help himself, glancing up at Sokka — <em>Fuck. Fuck, they’re gonna notice. They’ve gotta know. Thank god they can’t see my lap. Think about Uncle in that hot spring, Uncle in the hot spring…</em></p>
<p class="p1">It’s a miracle that Zuko makes it to the end of the meeting at all.</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">The thought was pecking at Sokka’s brain as the meeting adjourned. He drifted out the large double doors, turning the whole thing over in his mind. <em>Is he having second thoughts? It didn’t seem like it afterwards…</em> Maybe he was just overthinking everything. Sokka tended to do that, his first instinct to assess the situation from every possible angle. <em>But… in the gardens, talking about his father… I wouldn’t blame him for feeling confused.</em> Sokka hoped he was wrong, because honestly, he wasn’t confused at all anymore. Sokka turned a corner down a small side hallway, heading for the kitchens. Maybe a little snack would do him good.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka felt a featherlight touch at the back of his arm, and he turned. <em>Zuko.</em></p>
<p class="p1">“Hey, jerkbender,” Sokka quipped, feigning nonchalance. “Awesome meeting, I thought it was very productive, and you know, all that productivity gets me hungry, so —”</p>
<p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko tried to interrupt. He looked agitated.</p>
<p class="p1">“— So, I was just on my way to grab a little snackie, I don’t know if you also wanted something, or —”</p>
<p class="p1">“Just —” Zuko pulled at Sokka’s arm, eyes flitting around them, back and forth down the hall. He dragged both of them through a recessed door, shutting it quickly. They were crammed in a small cleaning closet, completely dark but for a tiny window in the door, just at eye level, screened with latticework.</p>
<p class="p1">“Zuko, what the hell.” Sokka was pushed up awkwardly against a set of shelves behind him.</p>
<p class="p1">“Shh,” Zuko hissed, kissing Sokka roughly. Sokka exclaimed in surprise, shifting and knocking something on the shelf behind him over with a clatter.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko maneuvered them, hands resting gently on Sokka’s upper arms, so that Sokka was pressed up against the wall just next to the door instead.</p>
<p class="p1">“We gotta be quiet,” Zuko breathed into Sokka’s ear, and shivers raced down Sokka’s spine at the hot puff of air and the sound of Zuko’s voice, low and smooth.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s body was melting into his, grabbing handfuls of Sokka’s clothes aimlessly. <em>I guess I was wrong?</em> It was hard to believe Zuko was having second-thoughts when his tongue was in Sokka’s mouth.</p>
<p class="p1">The stone wall was cold and hard on Sokka’s back as he leaned against it for support; Zuko’s fingers teasing at his waistband were making him weak in the knees. He could just feel those fingertips brushing against his stomach, his hips. Zuko’s chest was pressing into Sokka’s, breath hot and heavy against his ear. Sokka gasped when Zuko bent to kiss his neck, open-mouthed and wet.</p>
<p class="p1">“This couldn’t wait for your quarters, Lord Zuko?” Sokka panted.</p>
<p class="p1">“Hm. No,” he said simply, hands dipping into Sokka’s waist band to cup at Sokka’s cock.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka turned his head to the side, and from this angle he could just barely see out of the window in the door, view obstructed by the lattice. Empty. No one. Lucky, since keeping his groans to himself was beginning to get difficult.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka felt Zuko’s fingers begin to get situated, wrapping around him, but then all of a sudden they left. Sokka made a noise of disappointment, and Zuko shushed him again.</p>
<p class="p1">“Can’t have anyone hearing you,” Zuko murmured, dropping to his knees.</p>
<p class="p1">If Sokka wasn’t fully hard before, he was now.</p>
<p class="p1">“Zuko,” Sokka whispered, “what are you doing?” Sokka knew exactly what he was doing, but he wanted to ask anyways. Just to be sure it was really happening.</p>
<p class="p1">“I wanted to do this before but…” Zuko whispered back, pulling the waistband of Sokka’s trousers down, “I was — I was too nervous, I think,” and then his hands were smoothing over the skin of Sokka’s hips and upper thighs, “I didn’t know if you… Mm, anyway. Can I?” he asked, wrapping his hand around Sokka’s length.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka was mute, just nodding quickly, mouth open. He’d thought of this before, the image of Zuko on his knees in front of him, and getting to actually see those eyes staring up at him was thrilling.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko licked his lips, taking a breath. Apprehensive? Sokka wasn’t sure. He pressed kisses to Sokka’s stomach, hip, painstakingly slow. Sokka’s hands fluttered, unsure of where to land: the wall, Zuko’s shoulder, cupping his jaw. He brushed his hands over Zuko’s hair, pulled back into the traditional topknot, but didn’t mess with it. Probably wanted to keep it neat.</p>
<p class="p1">Then Zuko’s mouth was at the base of his cock, and licking up the length of it. He was certainly taking his time, but Sokka supposed that only made sense. He couldn’t complain; he counted himself lucky for getting to feel Zuko’s mouth at all. Each breath, he was still incredulous that he was even in this position, shoved into a cramped cleaning closet with the Fire Lord himself on his knees in front of him. Incredible, really, how much those ministers didn’t know…</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka glanced out the window again, still empty. It was a little exciting, the threat of discovery… it made the encounter feel almost forbidden, even if Zuko was the Fire Lord. He could <em>technically</em> do whatever he liked.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s tongue passed over his head, and it surprised Sokka, how good just that touch felt after Zuko’s teasing. The moan he let out surprised Sokka, too.</p>
<p class="p1">“Careful, Sokka,” Zuko said furtively, and the way he said Sokka’s name made his cock twitch.</p>
<p class="p1">“No one’s around,” Sokka breathed.</p>
<p class="p1">“I know, but still.” Zuko smiled, looking pretty pleased with himself. “Try your best.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Can’t guarantee how good <em>my best</em> is gonna be.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko licked at the head again, carefully wrapping his lips around Sokka and moving, just a bit at first.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka wanted to tell him how good that felt, but he resolved to keep his mouth shut as much as possible, and resorted to resting his fingers on Zuko’s cheek, thumb rubbing soft, encouraging circles along his cheekbone. It just kept getting better, Zuko moving further and further down. The sensation itself was familiar to Sokka; maybe it was just the cold air in the dark little closet, maybe it was just the danger of being caught, but Sokka could swear Zuko’s mouth was the warmest thing he’d ever felt.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s hand moved to rest lightly at the back of Zuko’s head, and as it settled there Zuko pulled back for a moment.</p>
<p class="p1">“Oh, sorry, I won’t —” Sokka lifted his hand quickly.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko lifted his hands to pull out his hairpiece’s pin, letting his hair fall around his face.</p>
<p class="p1">“Just making that easier for you,” Zuko whispered, so softly Sokka almost couldn’t hear him.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s breath caught as Zuko’s mouth sank around him again. Sokka’s hands fell to Zuko’s hair again, just resting there at first. Slowly, experimentally, Sokka threaded his fingers into the smooth locks, gathering the strands back from Zuko’s face for him. A soft moan escaped him. Damn. Sokka was going to have to concentrate to keep quiet.</p>
<p class="p1">The sight of Zuko there wasn’t helping, his robes and finery draped around him where he’d knelt on the cold stones, the shape of his jaw and closed eyelids fuzzy in the low light. Maybe it would help if Sokka just shut his eyes, but. He didn’t want to, <em>at all.</em> So he didn’t.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka could feel it now, the familiar heat curling in his belly. His hips twitched, and Zuko hummed, not slowing his pace. The breaths were coming harder from Sokka now; now that Zuko had found his rhythm. He grew more confident, switching between taking Sokka in long strokes and pulling back to suck and tongue at the head, with a hand wrapped around the base. That was going to be Sokka’s undoing, if Zuko wasn’t careful.</p>
<p class="p1">“Fuck, that’s so good baby,” Sokka hissed, the pet name slipping out without meaning to. Sokka felt apprehensive for a moment, would he not like that, is it too much, this is only the second time — but Zuko’s eyelashes just fluttered, and now Zuko was the one moaning.</p>
<p class="p1">“Doing so fucking good,” he whispered, gut wrenching in arousal when Zuko moaned again. <em>Made such a big deal about being quiet, </em>Sokka thought wryly. Sokka’s eyes went to the window again. Nothing, good — Sokka’s hips twitched again at Zuko’s mouth sucking, hard.</p>
<p class="p1">“Baby, I’m gonna come,” Sokka warned, breathless, fingers twisting in Zuko’s hair. He was struggling to keep from thrusting into Zuko’s mouth.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko just moaned again and kept it up, his pace increasing. <em>Does he want me to —</em></p>
<p class="p1">“Zuko, please —” and then Sokka was spilling into Zuko’s mouth, a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding rushing out of him, legs tensing. It was lovely, having the warmth of that mouth on him as he came, feeling Zuko’s tongue lapping at him through it. Zuko pulled back, still licking gently at the oversensitive head.</p>
<p class="p1">“Ah, careful,” Sokka gasped. “Sorry.” He wiped a thumb at the edge of Zuko’s mouth, at a drop of saliva spilling out.</p>
<p class="p1">“I wanted to.” Zuko’s face was dimly visible below him, but Sokka could see those eyes catch the light from the window, glinting.</p>
<p class="p1">“So hot.” Sokka was beginning to catch his breath.</p>
<p class="p1">A murmur at the door. Sokka’s heart jumped, looking out the window again. Two guards sauntered around the corner, conversation growing closer. Sokka pressed himself back against the wall, putting a finger to his lips. Sokka was trying desperately to quiet his own heavy breathing. Zuko stood, peeking out the window for a moment.</p>
<p class="p1">“…just wish he’d get off my case about it. Like, who even pays attention to which shift I’m on?”</p>
<p class="p1">A snort came from the other one. “I hear ya.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Busting my balls for no reason. You know it’s just a whole…” Their voices faded down the hall.</p>
<p class="p1">The two waited, still and breathing hard against each other. Finally, the corridor was silent.</p>
<p class="p1">“I think we’re safe,” Zuko said, hand going to push the door handle. Sokka’s arm shot out between Zuko and the door.</p>
<p class="p1">“But what about you?” Sokka said softly, hand threading under Zuko’s formal robes.</p>
<p class="p1">“Later, later,” Zuko waved him off.</p>
<p class="p1">“Fine, but let me out first. Can’t have anyone seeing the Fire Lord coming out of a cleaning closet,” Sokka pushed. Zuko’s hand fell from the handle.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka slipped out the door, checking either end of the corridor. Coast clear, so Sokka cracked the door for Zuko to leave, too. Out in the bright light, Sokka could see how flushed Zuko was, cheeks patchy pink.</p>
<p class="p1">“Your topknot,” Sokka said, pointing to his hair. Zuko’s hair was an utter wreck, strands tangled around each other from Sokka’s fingers.</p>
<p class="p1">“Ah, shit.” Zuko ran his fingers through his hair quickly, trying to pet it down. Looking around furtively, he darted back through the door and retrieved his hairpiece.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka held it for him while Zuko struggled for a moment with his hair. He pulled it back, tying it up askew, then held a hand out for the hairpiece. The final product wasn’t… the most polished, but it would do. Enough to not draw questions until Zuko could find a little privacy. Sokka repressed a happy laugh. <em>My Fire Lord is a sight to see. </em>That was a surprise — <em>My? He’s not mine. That’s a weird word to use.</em></p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">Zuko didn’t think he’d ever get used to it, seeing Sokka spread out next to <em>him</em>. In <em>his </em>bed. It seemed like something from a different life, their moments alone together. Like Zuko got to take off his Fire Lord costume and pretend to be someone else, for just a second. Zuko rolled onto his side, reaching out to drag a finger over Sokka’s hot skin. Sokka’s limbs were splayed wide and loose, and he was smiling through his heavy breathing.</p>
<p class="p1">“We’re getting pretty good at this, I think,” Sokka said breathlessly.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko hummed in agreement, admiring the warm glow of the sun on Sokka’s skin. At the end like this, when they’d both finished, was a contender for Zuko’s favorite part; when they were both relaxed, bodies comfortable with each other. He liked how easily he could just reach out and touch Sokka. The rest of the time… he had to hold himself back, for fear of just slamming Sokka against whatever wall was nearest. Sokka made his stomach swirl, like he was falling off a cliff. He felt like a teenager again, not able to keep his hands to himself.</p>
<p class="p1">“Come cuddle me,” Sokka pouted, pulling Zuko in and pulling a mussed cover over their naked bodies. Zuko was happy to get more of Sokka’s skin on his, tangle their legs together, press a kiss to Sokka’s cheek.</p>
<p class="p1">It made his chest tight all over again, to be close like this. It felt more intimate, really, than the sex. Zuko didn’t know why this, just the soft feeling of Sokka’s lips on his, felt more dangerous than Sokka’s tongue down his throat.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka moaned gently and pulled back, tucking his head into Zuko’s neck.</p>
<p class="p1">“You feel so good,” Sokka said. “I love when you do that thing with your tongue, just on the underside.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko blushed. It sounded so dirty, Sokka talking about it so plainly, but Zuko smiled at the praise.</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah?” Zuko’s arm curled around Sokka’s shoulders. He was glad Sokka had his nose buried against his neck, and couldn’t see how pleased Zuko was.</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah, it’s fantastic. They should call you the Blowjob Lord.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko snorted indignantly. “<em>Sokka</em>.”</p>
<p class="p1">“What? They should.”</p>
<p class="p1">“That’s the stupidest name I’ve ever heard.”</p>
<p class="p1">“<em>You’re</em> the stupidest name I’ve ever heard.” Sokka was just being impish, now.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko sighed. “That doesn’t even make sense,” he said softly, turning to kiss Sokka’s forehead.</p>
<p class="p1">They curled around each other, quiet, Sokka’s body solid and cozy-warm against Zuko’s side. Zuko stared at the curtains that hung above them, fiery crimson in the late afternoon sunlight.</p>
<p class="p1">It made his chest tight, sure, but he couldn’t shake a feeling of… apprehensiveness? Worry? Guilt? Them, together, felt like keeping a secret. Zuko still felt some of that shame. He knew it was misplaced, but still… they were sneaking around, like children. Zuko was a grown man, now. He’d never snuck around like this with Mai. It had never felt <em>secretive</em> like this.</p>
<p class="p1">Mai. Guilt clenched in Zuko’s belly, gnawing. She hadn’t visited, hadn’t even written… but Zuko hadn’t written either. What if Mai was out there, waiting for him to say something? Was she lonely, while Zuko was busying himself with someone else?</p>
<p class="p1">But that’s not what Sokka was. <em>He’s not some fling.</em> He was a dear friend. <em>A friend? We’re not really “just friends” anymore. </em>It felt wrong to think Sokka a <em>friend</em>, but then what was he? What was it, them curled around each other’s bodies? <em>An affair? </em>That word felt wrong, too.</p>
<p class="p1">That was besides the point. Mai had done so much for him, been so much to him. She’d always been a reminder that his life in the Fire Nation, broken as it was, was not just pain and confusion. How could he do this to her? But then, were they even together? Zuko had no idea what Mai thought. Did that even matter?</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p1"> </p>
<p class="p1">The candles were low, wax spilled down the sides in hardened rivulets. Sokka had spent a little longer with Zuko than he’d meant to that night. It’s not like Sokka was <em>complaining</em>, really. Far from it. But it was late, and he still had to finish those letters if he was going to send them out the next morning as planned.</p>
<p class="p1">He smoothed his hair back into its wolftail, taking a firm breath and picking up his brush. He continued a letter to Aang, elaborating on the developments Sokka had been privy to in the Trade Council meetings. He wrote about the little animals he’d noticed around the palace, the turtleducks that had grown fonder of him, the sparrowkeets that had different feathers here.</p>
<p class="p1">Satisfied, he started a message to Katara, smoothing the blank paper out in front of him.</p>
<p class="p1">What to say?</p>
<p class="p1">He tried to think of things that had happened since arriving in the Fire Nation, but for the life of him he couldn’t think of anything. Well, there was one exception. Obviously. He couldn’t tell Katara about <em>that</em>, though. Because if he told Katara, she’d tell Aang, and then… besides, how would Sokka even phrase that? <em>Hey Katara, how’s it going, anyways, now I’m sucking Zuko off at every opportunity. </em>Please. It sounded ridiculous.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka started with the professional stuff. Complained a little about the ministers — nothing incriminating, lest someone unsavory get their hands on the letter — commented on the upswing in negotiations. His time away from home hadn’t been for nothing.</p>
<p class="p1">Home — Sokka should ask about home. Oh, but Katara hadn’t been home in a while, either. For longer, even. He could ask about the Earth Kingdom, then. <em>Maybe she’s run into Toph. Or Suki.</em></p>
<p class="p1">Sokka finished the letter, keeping Zuko his secret for another time. He’d tell her, eventually. If he told her… everything would be different. And he loved having this… <em>thing</em> with Zuko; maybe he could hang onto it for just a little bit longer. Then he’d tell her.</p>
<p class="p1">He rolled the letter and slid it into a sheath. He stared at the stack of paper, untouched. <em>Suki. </em>Sokka wanted to write to her, but if he couldn’t bring himself to tell Katara, there was no <em>way</em> he could manage to tell Suki.</p>
<p class="p1">He felt gross, sitting there, thinking about her. Sure, they hadn’t <em>said</em> they were going to be exclusive, but… that was an excuse. Sokka knew in his gut that it would hurt her to find out. How could he explain this to her? <em>Hey Suki, long time no see. I hope you’re cool with me going behind your back to hook up with Zuko, the guy who burned down your village. </em>Sokka felt nauseous. Suki had never done anything like this, always welcomed him back with open arms. She was such a force of nature… a safe port to weather any storm in. Sokka didn’t have the words to tell her what had happened.</p>
<p class="p1">So he left the paintbrush in its cup, the letter unwritten.</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s eyes creaked open, a noise prodding him awake. Ah, just a bird. <em>A loud bird. </em>Zuko closed his eyes again to go back to sleep, but it didn’t take. He sighed, looking across the bed to the window.</p>
<p class="p1">It was early morning, before the palace would stir for the day. The light was still dim through the window, enough to see the rumpled covers next to him, draped across Sokka’s back. His face was mostly obscured; Sokka slept on his stomach, face turned to Zuko. Sokka’s mouth had fallen open just a little during the night. <em>Cute of him.</em></p>
<p class="p1">Sleep still wasn’t in the cards for Zuko, so he slid his arm under the covers, brushing his palm across Sokka’s back. They’d fallen asleep with their underclothes on, having given up parting for the night at that point. It seemed futile, really.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka breathed deeply, shifting in his sleep. Zuko just trailed circles on his back. It was nice to just feel him there, to know he was close enough. The touches woke Sokka, though, and he looked to Zuko blearily.</p>
<p class="p1">“Morning,” Sokka croaked, voice thick with sleep. “Is it morning?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Kind of,” Zuko said, hushed. “I can’t fall back asleep.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka smiled. “That’s no good.”</p>
<p class="p1">He turned to his side, shifting closer to Zuko to drape an arm across his waist and pull him into a lazy kiss. Neither had the energy for aggression; it was languid, and Zuko pulled Sokka’s arm closer in around him. He liked waking up to someone else in that vast, imperious bed. The mornings could get kind of cold.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka kissed him deeper, breath hitching softly. <em>Oh — this kiss isn’t innocent. </em>Zuko’s tongue curled into Sokka’s mouth, and Sokka pulled him tight to his chest, legs angling between each other, and <em>Ah. Morning wood, it seems. </em>The evidence was pressing into Zuko’s thigh.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko chuckled. “I guess it’s a <em>good</em> morning for you.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka grinned, “Oh I don’t know, maybe. That’s up to you, really,” slipping the words out into the kiss.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko tilted his hips into Sokka’s, his own arousal simmering. <em>Now</em> he was awake. He craved more friction, Sokka’s touch… but first, he wanted to take care of Sokka.</p>
<p class="p1">He didn’t want to stop kissing him, but it was a necessary evil. Zuko pulled out of the kiss, and Sokka grinned at him, broad and happy, and Zuko’s heart did a little flip flop that Zuko was going to ignore. He was too busy to acknowledge that, sliding the covers down and moving to settle between Sokka’s legs. Zuko busied himself with pressing open-mouthed kisses to the soft skin of Sokka’s inner thighs, and Sokka murmured something happily that Zuko didn’t quite catch.</p>
<p class="p1">He took the head softly in his mouth, and Sokka’s fingers threaded through his hair. Zuko was learning that Sokka loved that, couldn’t help but tug just at the roots, and Zuko was learning that he loved that, too. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but he loved when Sokka would forget to hold back, when his attentions would earn an anguished tug at the back of his head.</p>
<p class="p1">He worked Sokka over slowly. They were both still sleepy, dreamy. It was delightful, the way Sokka was sighing above him. The length of him in his mouth, heavy and hot, and Sokka’s hips tilting up. Sokka hit the back of Zuko’s throat, and Zuko loved the noise that Sokka made at that, deep in his chest. Zuko took Sokka deeper, letting Sokka guide his movements with a hand at his cheek.</p>
<p class="p1">“So <em>good</em>, Zuko,” Sokka was saying, “your mouth feels amazing, baby.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko moaned despite himself. He’d rather tell Sokka he liked getting his hair pulled than tell him how much he liked being called <em>that</em>.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s hips were thrusting up, his brow furrowing.</p>
<p class="p1">“Fuck, just, ah — hold on a second.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko stopped, lips slick. “You okay?”</p>
<p class="p1">“I’m more than okay,” Sokka laughed. “I was gonna come if you didn’t stop.” His hand was cupping Zuko’s cheek, thumb brushing his cheekbone.</p>
<p class="p1">“Don’t you want to?” Zuko wanted him to.</p>
<p class="p1">“Well, yeah, but — I have things I wanna do first.” Then Sokka was pulling Zuko up into a kiss, smiling and dragging his teeth on Zuko’s lip. “You, for instance.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko snorted, but let Sokka roll him over, switching places. Sokka wasn’t nearly as patient as Zuko, enveloping him in his mouth immediately, and Zuko’s hips jerked of their own accord. <em>Sun and stars, that mouth, tight and wet and so —</em></p>
<p class="p1">“Fucking good, right there, it’s — fuck —” Zuko was saying all those things out loud, he realized, eyes closed with his head back. He looked down at Sokka. Those blue eyes, glittering in the morning light, cheeks hollowed out. <em>Shit.</em></p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s hand cupped gently at Zuko’s sack, massaging at them. That had Zuko’s head falling back again, it was too much — he couldn’t watch at the same time. He was glad Sokka had figured that trick out. Another new discovery about himself. Sokka’s mouth lifted off, and he ran his grip over Zuko’s length for a few strokes before sinking back onto him again. It was going to be the end of him, really.</p>
<p class="p1">Then, of all things, Sokka’s slick fingers brushed accidentally against Zuko’s hole, and a shiver ran up his body. Zuko almost didn’t realize he groaned out loud, fingers twisting in the sheets.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka pulled back again, looking interested. He traced his fingers over it again, and got a — was that a <em>whimper</em>? Zuko didn’t know if he’d ever made that sound before.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s eyes lit up. “Is that good?” Another press, another moan. “Oh, you like it, don’t you?”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko just nodded, wordless.</p>
<p class="p1">“Okay, hold on one second.” Zuko watched Sokka rummage for that bottle of lotion that had moved from his bureau to his bedside table. He took a little on the pad of his thumb, settling back between Zuko’s legs. Zuko was holding his breath. Sokka’s fingers smoothed the lotion down, mouthing at Zuko’s cock.</p>
<p class="p1">“That good?” Sokka asked, fingers just rubbing. Zuko still couldn’t do anything but nod dumbly, and try not to squirm. “Zuko — tell me what you want, baby. Wanna make you feel good.”</p>
<p class="p1">“I —” Did he <em>have</em> to say it out loud? “Sokka, please,” he whined, hips flexing. “Just —”</p>
<p class="p1">“You can tell me,” Sokka encouraged.</p>
<p class="p1">“I want — fuck, I want them in me,” Zuko managed to get out, embarrassed. The words sounded foreign, coming out of his mouth.</p>
<p class="p1">“Mm-hmm,” Sokka hummed, spreading lotion on his fingers. “Just tell me what feels good, and if you want me to stop.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Uh-huh,” Zuko breathed, feeling Sokka’s fingertips trace around the rim again. Zuko’s whole body was a live wire.</p>
<p class="p1">Then Sokka’s finger pressed <em>just</em> inside, moving gently. It was — an odd sensation, bizarre at first, having something in <em>there</em>, but then the small movements were sending warm waves through his lower body, his skin prickling. Zuko couldn’t hold it back, the moans. His legs flexed, and he tried to still his hips.</p>
<p class="p1">“Zuko,” Sokka said, “you’re so tense. Do you want me to stop?”</p>
<p class="p1">“No,” Zuko choked out, “no, no. Please don’t.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Mm. Relax for me, okay?” His free hand was dragging fingernails lightly across Zuko’s hip.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko tried, taking a steadying breath and letting his limbs relax. It felt good, the hand on his hip, trailing across his lower stomach. Then Sokka’s finger pressed inside again, and Zuko’s body was singing. It was slow, careful, easy, but for a barely perceptible burn as Sokka worked his finger inside. Then another was teasing at the rim, working in, <em>stars</em> it just kept getting more intense, whimpers coming from someone else — it just couldn’t be Zuko, the one making those sounds. It would be too embarrassing.</p>
<p class="p1">“This feel good?” How could Sokka seriously ask that?</p>
<p class="p1">“Fucking yes,” Zuko groaned, voice crumbling. “Feels amazing —”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s fingers curled upwards, brushing <em>something</em>, sending little thrills up Zuko’s spine.</p>
<p class="p1">“<em>That</em>,” Zuko gasped. Sokka looked delighted, pressing his fingers into it again until Zuko was sure he was going to fly apart at the seams.</p>
<p class="p1">With Sokka’s fingers working in and out of him, pressing up, all it took was Sokka wrapping his mouth around Zuko for a few slow strokes for Zuko to come with a broken cry, hips jerking into Sokka’s mouth.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka pulled away, swallowing and looking up at Zuko with wide eyes.</p>
<p class="p1">“Don’t look at me like that,” Zuko said, feeling exposed.</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re so fucking sexy,” Sokka rasped, crawling up over him, kissing at Zuko’s skin.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka was hard against Zuko’s thigh, barely leaking onto his skin. Zuko wrapped his fingers around him, moving to get his mouth on him again, but Sokka held him in place.</p>
<p class="p1">“No, just, just touch me. Wanna kiss you,” Sokka said, so Zuko did. It was a sloppy kiss, Zuko still breathless and lightheaded from his orgasm, Sokka saying filthy things to him, and then Sokka was tensing, groaning through his own orgasm.</p>
<p class="p1">They both stilled, finally. Sokka held up his hand, away from the covers, still slick, laughing a bit. Zuko flushed, furiously red.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka sat up. “I don’t wanna ruin your lovely silk sheets, Your Highness.” He wet a cloth and wiped his hand, pulling on his trousers and tunic carefully. He handed the cloth to Zuko, still naked on the bed, and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m gonna go wash up,” Sokka said, slipping out the door, and then Zuko was alone.</p>
<p class="p1">He wiped at the spots where Sokka’s orgasm had caught his skin, and — Zuko grimaced — between his legs, still a bit messy from Sokka’s fingers. <em>I let him do that?</em> <em>Of course I did. Felt like heaven.</em></p>
<p class="p1">Sokka returned when Zuko had pulled his underclothes back on and slipped under the covers again.</p>
<p class="p1">“Hey there,” Sokka said, shedding a layer. “That was good, yeah?” It felt right to have him close again, whispering to him in the dim morning.</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah, it was. It felt different.” Zuko’s eyelids felt heavy again, and Sokka hummed. “I liked it a lot,” Zuko confessed quietly.</p>
<p class="p1">“I guessed as much,” Sokka said lazily. “I might have to have you do the same for me sometime. Seemed fun.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah, <em>fun</em>,” Zuko murmured, eyelids closing. He’d had no idea how much <em>fun</em> he could have.</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s brow furrowed, leaning over the candidate profiles. He’d requested work ups of a few possibilities, their political careers and any behind-the-scenes intel that was available from the Minister of Intelligence. He hadn’t told him why; did he really need to know? Maybe the old spymaster had put the pieces together himself.</p>
<p class="p1">One profile on the natural successor, an official with decades on the Education council behind him. Impressive, but what did he have to show for it? If he had proven anything, it was an ability to hew to tradition. Fine for maintaining the state of things, but that wasn’t Zuko’s goal at all.</p>
<p class="p1">Another strong contender, from one of the homeland provinces. Oversaw the whole province’s education apparatus, a valuable insight when he came to visit the capital’s proceedings. Again, excellent at maintaining an efficient system, churning out loyal Fire Nation citizens. Unfortunately, that Fire Nation needed to fade into history, a true history this time.</p>
<p class="p1">As soon as Zuko had seen the third, he’d known what he <em>wanted </em>to do. A young man from the colonies, starting up schools and writing treatises. From the sound of it, he was churning out histories of parts of the world at a breakneck speed, having traveled from one end to the other. Someone to usher in a new worldview for the Fire Nation, but — Zuko wasn’t sure the rest of his officials would accept it. They appreciated the colonies, sure; but viewed their roles as understudies to the capital. Not only that, but someone so young, with so few strings to pull… it was going to be a hard sell.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko sighed. Looking at them, he knew what he was going to do. He just needed to figure out how to break the bad news to Minister Shuro.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is getting porn-ier than I intended, and the chapter I have planned next is not going to help things. It's because I'm trapped in quarantine, okay? I promise I have plot planned.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Pretty in Red</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko hosts a goodwill gala, but only has eyes for Sokka.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am not immune to the "Zuko sees Sokka in Fire Nation colors and his brain blue-screens" trope.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">The next two weeks passed in a blur: each one of them dragging the other off into side rooms between meetings, dealing with the worrying rise in unemployed troops as they returned home, trying desperately to keep their relationship to each other under wraps. It was hard for Zuko to keep a straight face when Sokka would walk around the palace in looser and thinner clothes as summer reared its head, especially when he would catch Zuko staring and say,</p><p class="p1">“Enjoying the view?” His smiles were wicked, and he’d play up the whole thing, lounging around in the statuary. “The… <em>art</em> in the palace is very distinguished,” giving Zuko one of those long, purposeful up-and-down looks that made Zuko feel pinned under a magnifying glass.</p><p class="p1">He’d play dumb, of course, trying not to let on his… crush? Was that it? …to the guards that were, frustratingly, always nearby.</p><p class="p1">“Yes, they’re historical treasures,” Zuko would ramble, “this one is two hundred or so years old, from the myth of the sky-fox…”</p><p class="p1">And if he ran on for long enough, Sokka would get close, much closer than strictly friendly, and just rest his hand on the back of Zuko’s neck. A simple touch, but then he’d pull away and look pleased with himself when Zuko was fuming.</p><p class="p1">Zuko knew that demanding to take his dinners in private with just the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador was suspicious, but then he could enjoy Sokka climbing into his lap and playing with his hair as a dessert. And Zuko also knew that sending the guards away whenever they sparred was suspicious, too, but he couldn’t have them seeing that when Zuko surprised Sokka with a kiss, Zuko always won the round. Were they picking up on it? Maybe.</p><p class="p1">Sokka appreciated the privacy. The guilt of <em>home, Suki</em> gnawed in the back of his mind, but while both of those issues were out-of-sight, out-of-mind he could focus on making sure the Fire Lord was indulging in plenty of leisure time. It was helping with the restoration efforts, okay? Can’t have the Fire Lord too stressed-out to do his job.</p><p class="p1">The both of them were always too preoccupied to notice the silent looks the royal guards exchanged each time they went on a premature “break”. The guards were used to leaving the royals up to whatever they wished to do; besides, no one was complaining about getting more time off.</p><p class="p1"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko was nervous. More nervous than he knew he should be, but his nerves still jangled at the thought of the goodwill gala rapidly approaching. The last time that many foreigners had visited had been the coronation, and since then Zuko had really only talked to his crotchety old ministers and his Sokka. <em>My? Sokka’s not </em>mine<em>, really. Anyways. </em>Dignitaries from the other nations had been invited, civil servants of the Earth Kingdom, Northern Water Tribe merchants, along with nobles from the homelands and some of the colonies. Zuko was hoping desperately that the gala would go at least a small way towards mending the bitter rifts his nation had carved.</p><p class="p1">The night came before he was ready, and before he knew it he had attendants fussing over the final touches on his celebratory regalia.</p><p class="p1">“Lai, it’s fine,” he sighed, batting gently at her hands fidgeting with the placement of one of his shoulder pieces.</p><p class="p1">“It would be improper for the Fire Lord to not look impeccable for his own party,” Lai quipped. She adjusted a clasp. “I don’t know about the others, but I overheard a few of the nobles wondering about the grandeur of it all.” She patted his shoulder to indicate she was finished. “I’m sure this will impress.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko discovered that Lai had a talent for embroidery after catching her stitching in her free time. She’d been embarrassed, sheepishly showing Zuko the little design she was creating for her son’s dress shirt, but Zuko had insisted on Lai overseeing a new set of robes for him, and an ambassadorial uniform for Sokka. It was beside the point that ambassadors didn’t have to wear a uniform.</p><p class="p1">The robes she’d created for Zuko overdelivered on his expectations: a robe made of floaty sheets of thin vermillion silk falling in layers, hems finished in gold thread, with a thick front panel Lai had embroidered with shimmering brocade dragons. She’d commissioned leather shoulder pieces, too, dyed black and finished with gold hardware, echoing the swooping lines of their nation’s armor. “To show them you mean business,” she’d said. She was exacting about the specifications.</p><p class="p1">Zuko shifted, admiring the handiwork in the mirror. “This is incredible, Lai. Thank you.”</p><p class="p1">She bowed her head. “It’s an honor to dress the Fire Lord, Your Highness.”</p><p class="p1">“You really <em>can</em> just call me Zuko,” he said.</p><p class="p1">“Lord Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">She’d run Sokka’s new set past him, too, a similarly well-crafted outfit from what Zuko could tell of the folded clothes. He’d resolved to put a generous bonus in Lai’s next pay.</p><p class="p1">Another attendant, Tumu, finally stopped fussing with Zuko’s hair, hands fragrant with some sort of floral hair product that Zuko had missed the name of.</p><p class="p1">“Would you like assistance with anything else, Lord Zuko?” He asked, stepping back.</p><p class="p1">“No, thank you. Please, take the rest of the day off.” Zuko shifted his shoulders under the weight of all the heavy fabric. “Come to the gala, if you’d like. I spent a bit too much on it, you both deserve to enjoy some of it.”</p><p class="p1">Tumu’s eyes perked up. “You have my gratitude, Your Highness.” He stepped out of the room as Lai sighed.</p><p class="p1">“I’d like to, but my son leaves school in the afternoons and I like to spend dinners with him when I can.” Zuko suddenly realized how late Lai had been staying in preparation for the gala, how many nights she must have missed.</p><p class="p1">“You’ll have to take more afternoons off then,” Zuko said.</p><p class="p1">“Oh no, my lord, I couldn’t —”</p><p class="p1">“I won’t see you stay late here anymore,” he said firmly.</p><p class="p1">She paused with a small smile. “Yes, Your Highness.”</p><p class="p1">With that, Zuko was alone in his quarters, a welcome reprieve before jumping into the diplomatic fray. He sat on an ottoman, carefully smoothing out the robes around him. Can’t have it all creased before the gala even begins. His breathing felt shallower than it should be. <em>What if a fight breaks out? What if one of the nobles offends our guests? What if the appetizers are a let down? I know I should have gone with the stuffed sparkpeppers. I shouldn’t have listened to the Minister of Finance, we spent too much on this, I know it. I’ll bankrupt the whole Fire Nation before long. They’re going to leave more pissed off than —</em></p><p class="p1">The door to his chambers creaked open, and Zuko’s eyes shot up. Sokka peeked his head in.</p><p class="p1">“Hey sparky. Just coming to say hi,” he said, sauntering through the entryway. He was still in his everyday clothes.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, why aren’t you ready?” Zuko stood, going to shoo him out the door. “I need your help with the merchants and officials from the North. It took so much cajoling to get them to even come, after the siege —”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t worry about it,” Sokka said languidly. “The chief loves me, and I got chummy with some of the guys before we left. You’re just lucky Hahn isn’t here.”</p><p class="p1">“Hahn? Who’s Hahn? You’ve never mentioned him before.” Zuko was hurrying them through the anteroom.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, don’t look so jealous,” Sokka teased, pulling back on Zuko’s hand. Zuko stopped, looking back indignantly.</p><p class="p1">“I’m not <em>jealous</em>. I don’t even know who this Hahn guy is.”</p><p class="p1">“He hates me because I stole his girlfriend,” Sokka said, sliding his arms underneath a layer of Zuko’s clothes.</p><p class="p1">“It’s good he didn’t come, then.” Zuko was almost too preoccupied to be affected by Sokka drawing closer. Almost.</p><p class="p1">“That’s what I said, you silly turtleduck,” Sokka purred, kissing at Zuko’s jaw, hands finding their way under another layer.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko complained, “You <em>need to get ready</em>. The gala’s already starting.”</p><p class="p1">“But you look so good. And smell like… is that jasmine?” Sokka said against the skin of his neck.</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know. Sokka, stop.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused. “Do you want me to?” He sounded on the verge of giggling.</p><p class="p1">Zuko hesitated before sighing, “Yes.” Sokka pulled away, licking his lips.</p><p class="p1">“Suit yourself. I’ll go put on my party dress.” He grinned and bowed deeply, throwing an arm out in a dramatic flourish. “As my liege requests.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko smacked the seat of Sokka’s pants lightly as he walked away, getting a surprised chirp from him.</p><p class="p1">He followed Sokka out the door, turning in the opposite direction towards the ballroom, rather than the rest of the residential wing. The palace was buzzing with activity, servants flitting around with trays of treats and jugs filled with various beverages; Zuko had planned on a variety, just to be safe. The servants would freeze, heads bowed, as Zuko walked past, which irked Zuko. He knew it was a force of habit, but it still felt over-dramatic no matter how many times it happened.</p><p class="p1">He breezed into the ballroom, two guards following close behind.</p><p class="p1">“Your Highness, we need to announce your arrival before—” One of them protested weakly.</p><p class="p1">“They know who I am, I invited them,” Zuko said, entering the cavernous room. It had been decorated with the colors of all four nations; Zuko had demanded the Air Nomad colors be included as well, as a point of principle. Flowers, decorative braziers, the best tsungi horn player in Caldera City — Zuko had sprung for the whole nine yards. He couldn’t have his visitors feeling like an afterthought. At his entrance, the guests turned to him expectantly.</p><p class="p1"><em>Oh. My speech. </em>“Uhmm, welcome!” he called out. He’d prepared for this, but now his heart was racing and all his practice had flown out the window. “I’m so grateful you all came.” He cleared his throat. “I, ah, it’s my hope that, over good food and drink and music, we can begin to repair the connections between our peoples. So —” Zuko raised his hand, “enjoy yourselves!”</p><p class="p1">The music started up again, and all those staring eyes turned to their companions. <em>That went okay, I guess.</em> Zuko’s shoulders relaxed. He cast his eyes around for a friendly face, spotting Intelligence Councilman Yaije talking to <em>that scribe, what was her name… Uzuli!</em></p><p class="p1">He approached them, raising a hand in greeting.</p><p class="p1">“Councilman Yaije, Madam Uzuli,” Zuko said, managing to plaster his best professional smile on.</p><p class="p1">They bowed their heads in greeting. “It’s an honor, Your Highness,” Uzuli said, surprised.</p><p class="p1">“Uhm, how are the shrimp-mussels? I ordered them from the Eastern Archipelago,” Zuko said. There was an awkward pause. Small talk had never been his strong suit.</p><p class="p1">“My lord?” Yaije looked confused.</p><p class="p1">“The, uh. The snacks.” Zuko fiddled with the hem of his sleeve.</p><p class="p1">“Oh! Delicious, Your Highness.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko tried his best to move throughout the room, clasping hands with his guests from the other nations, who were regarding some of the Fire Nation nobles with suspicion. It was awkward at first, but he thought he was having a bit of success, starting a few conversations between visitors and aristocrats. It was the easiest between the merchants, with plenty of common ground and the promise of profit greasing the wheels. Zuko was clutching his cup, a hammered bronze goblet with three legs that the servants were keeping full to the brim. It was tasty, whatever citrus-y cocktail the palace chefs had put together for the evening, but Zuko was being very careful not to have too much. Making a sloppy scene at this gala was his worst nightmare.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was in the middle of pretending to listen to a young noblewoman’s story about her pet poodle-monkey when a booming laugh snatched his attention. There was Sokka, by the buffet table — <em>as per usual</em> — clapping a hand on a surprised dignitary’s shoulders. And — <em>dear Sun in the heavens above…</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko’s head felt like it had been rung like a drum. How Lai had managed to accomplish that, Zuko couldn’t fathom; he’d seen Sokka in so many settings, in his thicker water tribe gear, in those loose tunics he liked to tease Zuko with, in his old Fire Nation disguise, in his favorite armor… but it was like seeing him for the first time. The fabric of his undershirt was wine red, made out of a gleaming silk, with a short-sleeved robe over it, the hem coming down to his knees. Sokka had left the front of the robe open — not quite the proper way to wear it — and underneath there was a black leather jerkin, lined with silver studs carved with… Zuko couldn’t see at this distance, but when Sokka moved they caught the lantern light and <em>gleamed</em>. And the matching black boots with upturned toes… Zuko couldn’t take his eyes off him. It was Lai’s fault for including so many beautiful details in the clothes. He was only admiring the craftsmanship.</p><p class="p1">The noblewoman was still rambling, “…and Taozi was absolutely <em>filthy</em> when we finally found her, I had to pay the groomer extra — such a headache for me —”</p><p class="p1">“My condolences, madam,” Zuko interrupted absently, “I’m sorry, I have a few political items to take care of —” He was barely halfway through the sentence when he turned on his heel and moved through the crowd towards Sokka, as quickly as his cumbersome robes would allow.</p><p class="p1">Sokka perked up at the sight of him. “Zuko!” One hand held a plate piled full of appetizers, so he reached his free arm around Zuko’s shoulders to give him a hug. Zuko noticed that Sokka didn’t have to lean up to fit his arm around Zuko. <em>Had Sokka gotten taller?</em></p><p class="p1">“Greetings, Ambassador Sokka,” Zuko said, trying to keep a straight face.</p><p class="p1">“So formal. Zuko, this is Pao Shuh, from the Western Earth Kingdom.”</p><p class="p1">The dignitary looked shocked for a moment before bowing stiffly.</p><p class="p1">“It is an honor to meet you, Fire Lord Zuko,” he said, voice emotionless.</p><p class="p1">“The honor is my own, Pao Shuh.”</p><p class="p1">“Many thanks. If I may say, your nation has become far more… welcoming since your ascension to the throne,” he said with a bitter edge.</p><p class="p1">“I know it is my duty to help atone for the damage my people —”</p><p class="p1">Sokka cut Zuko off with a wave. “You <em>guys</em>, this is a party! I see two empty cups,” Sokka said, pointing to the cups each man held; nevermind that Zuko’s was full.</p><p class="p1">“If you’ll excuse us, I have to make sure the Fire Lord has acquainted himself with the snack bar,” Sokka said, slipping an arm around Zuko’s waist and steering them away from Pao Shuh.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, that wasn’t very diplomatic of you,” Zuko chided.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, yeah, I know. Pao Shuh will understand. I haven’t gotten to talk to you all night.”</p><p class="p1">In close proximity, Zuko noticed the blue and silver embroidery in the fabric of Sokka’s robe, little swirling wave patterns. Sokka had left the top of his undershirt unlaced, the panels falling back and revealing the curve of his collarbones. <em>He’s gotta be doing this to me on purpose.</em></p><p class="p1">“It’s not like I’ve been avoiding you,” Zuko said, hushed. Sokka was scooping up more appetizers, a mix of savory buns and fruity sweets. “I’ve been working on diplomatic relationships. Everyone hates us.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, they’re still eating your snacks,” Sokka said, through a mouthful of honeyed goji-quats. “And drinking your punch.” He punctuated his statement with a swig of citrus cocktail to wash the goji-quats down. “All delicious, by the way.”</p><p class="p1">“I guess.” Zuko felt a little frazzled, from having to keep up his political veneer for such an extended length of time. He noticed that the carved designs on Sokka’s jerkin were water tribe symbols, and that he had leather straps crossing his body, holding an ornate scabbard tight to his hip.</p><p class="p1">“Is that a new sword?” Zuko asked, touching the pommel with his fingertips.</p><p class="p1">Sokka beamed. “Yeah, I went to the blacksmith and made a new one. Not quite space-sword, but this one is pretty, too.” His smile turned impish as he leaned in, close to Zuko’s ear. “I can show you my <em>sword</em> in private, if you like.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko hissed, “Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">“The <em>handiwork</em> is really something. So <em>long</em> and <em>hard</em>—”</p><p class="p1">Zuko pushed Sokka away lightly. “Sokka, I swear to the sun and stars, if you don’t cut it out —”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was blushing violently red, heat flashing in his stomach. Sokka leaned in close again, speaking low and soft so only Zuko could hear.</p><p class="p1">“Then what? You’ll teach me a lesson? I’m sure I have a lot to learn, <em>my lord</em>.” Sokka was nearly giggling at the pained faced Zuko was making. He pulled back, satisfied.</p><p class="p1">Zuko took a deep gulp of his drink. He figured he was going to need it.</p><p class="p1">Sokka only got a few more moments to tease him before Zuko was pulled away by another disgruntled nobleman, and Sokka drifted over to the group of watertribesmen discussing the restoration of the Southern Tribe. It was insufferable, the griping that Zuko had to field, so Zuko had made a game of it; every time a Fire Nation noble or high-ranking official complained about how the end of the war had affected them, Zuko took a drink. It didn’t take long for him to get tipsy.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was blissfully alone for a moment, enjoying the music, when Sokka looped back around to him, sidling up close to his side.</p><p class="p1">“Happy with your choice of musicians, your sparkiness?” Sokka had abandoned his plate of food at some point. He rested his hand on Zuko’s leather shoulder piece.</p><p class="p1">“Hm? Yeah, the tsungi hornist is excellent.” Zuko was feeling less tense after a couple glasses, joints pleasantly relaxed.</p><p class="p1">“I think I’d be pretty good at the tsungi horn, actually.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted. “Really.” He took a sip of his drink.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, really,” Sokka’s hand slid to the back of Zuko’s neck, leaned in close, “I’m pretty good at blowing.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko choked on the cocktail, inhaling a little of the citrus-y drink in the process.</p><p class="p1">Sokka patted his back as he coughed. “You okay, Your Highness? Something bothering you?”</p><p class="p1">“I hate you,” Zuko croaked when he caught his breath.</p><p class="p1">Sokka hummed into his ear, barely audible over the music, “You liked me just fine when my cock was in that pretty mouth of yours.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko could feel the flush prickle at his cheeks. His tongue was beginning to get loose from the cocktails, and no one was nearby, so he thought, <em>Fuck it</em>, whispering, “You’re the one who was begging for it last night.”</p><p class="p1">It was Sokka’s turn to blush, but he took the statement as a challenge. “My Lord, I think you’ve forgotten who was doing the begging. If I recall correctly, your Royal Highness requested I put my fingers —”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka!” He’d called Zuko’s bluff, and Zuko hushed him. “There are people everywhere —”</p><p class="p1">“And none of them are paying any attention.” Sokka was getting closer, as close as he could without pressing his body up against Zuko’s. “I don’t know why, you look so handsome and regal tonight.” His words were getting soft and a little slurred around the edges.</p><p class="p1">“Well, thank you.” Zuko tugged at a hem. “Lai worked really hard on it.”</p><p class="p1">“Tell her I’m…” Sokka’s were wandering freely over Zuko’s face, mouth parting. “…very grateful.”</p><p class="p1">In the lantern light, with a little liquor in Zuko’s veins, Sokka’s skin was almost glowing. Zuko wanted to kiss it like it deserved, but here… it would start an uproar, in so many ways.</p><p class="p1">And then Zuko was pulled aside by a pair of watertribesmen, who’d hatched a business idea with the help of the punch, and before Zuko knew it he turned and Sokka had disappeared into the crowd. As much as Sokka was testing the boundaries they’d set, Zuko found himself wanting them tested. He kept hoping to feel Sokka’s breath on his ear again, to exchange furtive, knowing glances, to feel those little brushes of fingertips that had his senses on high alert.</p><p class="p1">The night wore on, and by the grace of the spirits no drunken arguments broke out. The music still played, but guests began to trickle out, in various states of disarray. Zuko was seated at a table, finishing another cup, when he felt two hands at his shoulders.</p><p class="p1">“Time for the Fire Lord to retire for the night, don’t you think?”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko sighed happily, turning to look up into his face.</p><p class="p1">“I think the Fire Lord has had a <em>long, hard</em> night…”</p><p class="p1">“…and paid far too little attention to his Southern Water Tribe ambassador.” Zuko stood, hands reaching for Sokka’s hips, but Sokka twisted away. Heat curled in Zuko’s gut. He’d spent all night suffering Sokka’s dirty whispering, the <em>looks</em> Sokka gave him, like Zuko was a prize cut of meat, the way Sokka looked with that leather jerkin cut slim around his chest and waist.</p><p class="p1">“Mm, not yet. <em>Naughty </em>Fire Lord. We wouldn’t want a scandal.” Sokka turned to walk towards the entry. “Are you coming?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko caught up to Sokka, whispering, “I will be.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked at Zuko with a glint in his eye, picking up the pace of his strides. They very nearly jogged out of the ballroom, Zuko not bothering to say his goodbyes. His guests would understand.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">If the guards didn’t know before, they knew now, what with the way Zuko almost <em>pushed </em>Sokka into his chambers, tumbling into the anteroom and shutting the doors unceremoniously.</p><p class="p1">“Someone’s eager tonight —” Sokka managed to say, before Zuko had his mouth on Sokka’s and his hands were gripping at whatever part of Sokka was nearest.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was pushing them back, and then Sokka bumped roughly into a table, sending scrolls clattering to the floor. Not very regal.</p><p class="p1">“You’re making a mess,” Sokka gasped, and when he broke the kiss Zuko moved to his neck, licking at the skin. Sokka reached a hand up to hold the back of Zuko’s head.</p><p class="p1">“Looked so fucking hot tonight,” Zuko growled through his open-mouthed kisses, hands gripping Sokka’s hips.</p><p class="p1">“Who, me?” Sokka said, feigning innocence. I mean, he knew it was a nice outfit, but.</p><p class="p1">“Wanted to fuck you on that buffet table.” Zuko nipped at Sokka’s neck, and Sokka had to bite back a groan.</p><p class="p1">“On the goji-quats? Zuko,” Sokka playfully reprimanded.</p><p class="p1">“It’s not my fault,” he moaned, pushing off Sokka’s first layer, that robe with blue swirls. He fumbled with the jerkin and straps, fingers clumsy with liquor. “You were whispering all that filthy shit to me…”</p><p class="p1">“I love seeing you flustered,” Sokka admitted, hands sliding under Zuko’s layered robe. Somewhere underneath he found the underclothes, the last soft layer before Zuko’s skin. He was always so warm, always running around with that fire in him.</p><p class="p1">Sokka continued, “Thinking of making you hot and bothered, getting you hard under all this shit,” he pulled at the layers of robe, “it’s fucking hot.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was having trouble, so Sokka helped him undo the clasp on his jerkin and removed the sword from his hip, pushing it behind him on the table. Then Zuko’s mouth was on his again, and Sokka pulled aimlessly at Zuko’s billowing robes.</p><p class="p1">“They’re beautiful, but you gotta take this shit off,” Sokka panted, and Zuko obliged, barely managing to not tear the new robe. It would be such a shame if they ripped it right out of the gate.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was left in his underclothes, a simple red shift, pressing Sokka into the side of the table, hands undoing the tie in Sokka’s hair. Sokka braced his hands behind him against the table, letting Zuko touch where he liked and kiss where he liked. As much as he enjoyed showering Zuko in attention, it was nice to be fawned over, too. Zuko was beginning to undo Sokka’s undershirt, kissing at his chest as he did so. Sokka heard him mumble something against his skin.</p><p class="p1">“What’s that?” Sokka said, resting a hand on Zuko’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">The wet, hot attention of Zuko’s tongue had Sokka half-hard in his trousers, but Zuko paused as his kisses reached Sokka’s stomach and he knelt.</p><p class="p1">“Want you to fuck me,” Zuko said, leaning his head against Sokka’s thigh, mouthing at Sokka’s erection. His words were loose, and his hands were groping at Sokka’s hips and ass recklessly. <em>He certainly enjoyed the punch.</em></p><p class="p1">“Zuko, you’re drunk,” Sokka said softly, running his palm up to Zuko’s cheek. He leaned into the touch, and Sokka let Zuko take two of his fingers into his mouth. He touched the pad of his fingers to the ridge of Zuko’s teeth, holding back a groan. Zuko was rarely wanton like this, and it made Sokka feel like he was going to spontaneously combust.</p><p class="p1">“Mm, yeah,” Zuko mumbled, Sokka’s fingers falling out of his mouth to grip his chin. “Still want you to fuck me. Please.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was looking up at him with those <em>eyes</em>, burning, but Sokka knew this wasn’t how he wanted to remember it. Or rather, how he wanted Zuko to remember it.</p><p class="p1">“Another time, baby.” Zuko whined and stood, kissing Sokka hard, like he if he just kissed Sokka hard enough he could convince him. “Zuko —”</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled back slightly, holding the side’s of Zuko’s face.</p><p class="p1">“You don’t want to?” Zuko whispered. “‘M sorry, ‘m sorry, we don’t have to do that, I just —”</p><p class="p1">“I want to,” Sokka murmured. Zuko’s eyes were flicking from Sokka’s mouth to his eyes, searching his face.</p><p class="p1">“Then why not?”</p><p class="p1">“You’re drunk.”</p><p class="p1">“So?”</p><p class="p1">“So,” Sokka said, smoothing his hands over Zuko’s hair, “we’ve never done… that before, and I want to do it right.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko considered that for a moment and then huffed. “Mmph. Why are you making sense?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka laughed. “I’m always right.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko kissed him again. “Please —” he was speaking into Sokka’s mouth, words garbled, “please tell me we can still fool around.” His hands started groping aimlessly again. “Just a little. Wanted you so bad all night.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s breath hitched when Zuko’s hands slid under his shirt, nails scratching lightly at his back.</p><p class="p1">“I think we can figure something out.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko woke in his bed alone, feeling less hungover than he expected. He rolled over, hand reaching out to find an empty mess of blankets next to him. Had Sokka spent the night? Zuko remembered them falling asleep together. Maybe Sokka had left him to sleep alone.</p><p class="p1">The night before came swimming back to him, memories all still accounted for, if a little bleary around the edges. The gala had been a success, as far as Zuko could tell; no ruckuses, guests well-fed. It would be good to give them something to remember the Fire Nation for other than their military presence. A small step, along with the decolonization efforts.</p><p class="p1">He’d have to check with his ministers that nothing had happened after Zuko left. He’d left early… he remembered holding Sokka tight, tumbling into his rooms with him. Right in front of the guards. Zuko groaned. Rumors would be flying around the palace soon. They likely already were… and then Zuko recalled his drunken proposition with a wince. He <em>knew</em> he must have sounded stupid, bringing it up at such an inopportune time. Sokka letting him down gently — Zuko regretted putting Sokka on the spot like that. Why couldn’t he have just held his tongue?</p><p class="p1">Zuko yanked the covers up, resolving to stay holed up in his rooms for as long as possible. He couldn’t face the servants and aristocrats he was sure were gossiping, and he couldn’t face Sokka. At least, not for a few hours.</p><p class="p1">Sokka didn’t give him that, appearing through the door to the washroom, hair wet, wearing one of Zuko’s sleeping robes. Zuko noticed absently that it was the one patterned with fire lilies.</p><p class="p1">He hid his face in the pillows. <em>I can’t believe I acted like that.</em></p><p class="p1">“Heyy,” Sokka sing-songed. Zuko felt the mattress dip and shift as Sokka sat down on the bed, leaning over to nuzzle into the covers. “Are you hiding from me?” His voice was playful, muffled by the pillows.</p><p class="p1">“Yes,” Zuko mumbled, picking his head up. He didn’t meet Sokka’s eyes.</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked at him for a moment. “And why would <em>the</em> Fire Lord Zuko be hiding?” he asked, gentler.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh.” Zuko screwed his eyes shut, hand covering his face. “I was a dumbass last night.”</p><p class="p1">“No you weren’t.” Sokka tucked a hair behind Zuko’s ear. “You just had a little too much to drink. Happens to everyone.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko grunted and dared to look to Sokka. His hair was hanging in his face, floppy and damp, and he still had his necklace on from the night before, a silver chain with a small pendant carved with the Water Tribe insignia. <em>How does he look so good in the mornings? That’s not normal.</em></p><p class="p1">“Still feel guilty.” Zuko knew he was pouting, but he couldn’t help it.</p><p class="p1">“Besides, even if you <em>were</em> a dumbass, you’re my dumbass,” Sokka said, wrapping his arms around Zuko and pulling him into his chest.</p><p class="p1">Zuko tucked his head into its familiar place against Sokka’s shoulder and thought about that.</p><p class="p1">“I’m your dumbass?” he said, running a finger over the jut of Sokka’s collarbone.</p><p class="p1">“You’re my dumbass,” Sokka repeated.</p><p class="p1">Zuko thought a little more. “Is… are we just dumbasses?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka laughed. “I can be a dumbass sometimes, too, yeah.”</p><p class="p1">“No… like.” Zuko stopped again, chewing on his lip. “Am I just your dumbass, or —”</p><p class="p1">“Hm? Zuko, what —”</p><p class="p1">“Am I more than that?” Zuko held his breath. Sokka’s hand squeezed his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“You’re more than that.” Sokka’s voice went quiet and shaky.</p><p class="p1">“Because, you know — you’re more than that to me.” Zuko was sure Sokka could feel how fast his heart was beating.</p><p class="p1">Sokka let that hang in the air before asking, “What, uh, am I? To you.”</p><p class="p1">“I — I don’t —” Zuko’s hand drifted across Sokka’s stomach, tracing the fire lilies on the robe. “I don’t want to say the wrong thing. I’m not good at this.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s okay if this is just…” Sokka started.</p><p class="p1">“No, listen, I — I’ve never felt like this about another guy before.” Sokka was silent and still. “It’s — well, we’re friends, and you were such a good friend to me, and now we hook up, and all of that, and I thought maybe this was just going to be friends fooling around, or something, but then —” Now that he’d gotten started, it just spilled out of him. “then, then we do <em>this</em> and you sleep in my bed, and I think about you all the time. I cared about you so much even before, but — now, it’s different, I think.” Zuko dared to look up at Sokka.</p><p class="p1">“Uh,” Sokka’s voice was thick. “Zuko, I’m… you know I care about you, too.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt the “but” coming. His stomach turned.</p><p class="p1">“This is new for me, too.” Sokka’s hand drifted over Zuko’s back. “I know I haven’t said anything, but. You’re special to me. I think it’s different, too.”</p><p class="p1">Just like that, Zuko’s chest went from tight to bursting, elated.</p><p class="p1">“Thank the spirits,” Zuko sighed in relief. He let his head flop down onto Sokka’s chest again. “So… what do we call each other, then?”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Sokka thought for a moment. “Paramours?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted. Sokka tried again, “Suitors? Maybe I’m your concubine.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re not my concubine.”</p><p class="p1">“Well I’m certainly not just your<em> buddy</em> anymore.”</p><p class="p1">“We’re on the same page there.”</p><p class="p1">“What about slam piece?”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, could you try to be serious for just like, thirty seconds?”</p><p class="p1">“Okay, okay.” He paused to think again.</p><p class="p1">This time Zuko piped up. “Lovers?”</p><p class="p1">“That feels so old-fashioned. You read too many plays. What about boyfriends?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko had thought it, but hadn’t been willing to say it. He turned it over in his mind. <em>Boyfriends. </em></p><p class="p1">“That sounds nice,” Zuko said against Sokka’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Mm. Can I get a kiss from my boyfriend?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko shifted to hover above Sokka’s face. He was grinning, hands holding Zuko’s cheeks. The word Zuko wanted to say was heavy on his tongue, but he knew he couldn’t cross that line. Instead, he just kissed Sokka, his skin smelling of the fresh soaps and lotions from the royal washroom.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>As always, comments are appreciated :)  Thank you so much for reading!</p><p>Next up on the menu is some cavity-inducing fluff.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Sokka in Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka and Zuko aren't being nearly as subtle as they think they are.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Added a tag for this chapter for the mention of Ozai's treatment of Zuko growing up, but it's not graphic, just a reference. Still, added the tag in case.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">It’s never a necessity, leaving the palace; if he really wanted to, Zuko could stay behind those walls forever. But Zuko tries his best to get out into the city as much as possible, to stay grounded. And, as Sokka argues, street food just doesn’t taste the same if a courier serves it to you on a platter.</p><p class="p1">“I’ll never get tired of this stuff,” Sokka mumbles around a mouthful of fried komodo chicken. “You know they put sparkpeppers in the batter?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko takes a bite out of his wing, greasy in his fingers. It’s steaming underneath the crispy skin, with a zing of spice.</p><p class="p1">“This is pretty good,” he mumbles. He keeps a napkin close to the wing; it wouldn’t do to have the townspeople seeing their Fire Lord get grease all over himself.</p><p class="p1">“I <em>told</em> you.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I know. You’re always right, or whatever.”</p><p class="p1">They made their way slowly through the markets, peering at the different wares on offer. After spending so much time in the echoing silence of the palace, the cramped bustle of the markets was a relief to Zuko. The air was ripe with the smell of grilling foods, rich spices, and the shouts of vendors.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s “disguise” had been serving them fairly well; with his common, pragmatic clothes and a hood covering his head, the surprised looks were few and far between. Even when someone did seem to recognize Zuko, he had brushed past them before they could decide whether or not they had <em>actually</em> seen the Fire Lord at the farmer’s market. After all, maybe the Fire Lord had the scar on the other side…</p><p class="p1">Still, someone recognized him every so often, especially with Sokka yelling “Zuko!” every time he spotted an interesting trinket. Zuko thought that, out of all the gawkers, the young women probably made him the most uncomfortable.</p><p class="p1">They’d turn their heads, wondering why someone would be yelling the Fire Lord’s name, and see him, see the scar, and come up to him with doe eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko? Like <em>Fire Lord</em> Zuko?” they’d ask him, even though he’d falter under the attention and pull his hood down lower.</p><p class="p1">“Uhm, hello,” he’d say, casting his eyes desperately to Sokka, who was inevitably preoccupied with whatever bauble had drawn his eye.</p><p class="p1">“I can’t believe I’m meeting the Fire Lord in a jewelry shop,” one had sighed, and another time one had giggled, “The flowers they’re selling today are so pretty, don’t you think?”</p><p class="p1">And Zuko would agree limply, calling out for Sokka, who was endlessly amused by the situation no matter how many times it happened. He’d sidle over, grinning mischievously, putting on his mega-watt charm for them. Tell them how lovely they were, don’t you agree, Zuko? And how lonely Zuko is, up in that big palace — don’t you agree, Zuko? Zuko would only flush harder and grow more panicked, until Sokka would relent and bid the girls goodbye for now, arm around Zuko’s shoulders.</p><p class="p1">He’d cup his hand to Zuko’s ear and say, “Don’t worry, I’ll keep you company tonight,” and Zuko would dip his head, grateful that his hood concealed his face.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Signing up to be a royal guard had sounded prestigious on paper, but in practice it was mind-numblingly boring. Nothing to do but wander from post to post, counting the seconds until it was time to leave and grab a drink at the Laughing Rhino. Spirits bless that little tavern just outside the palace.</p><p class="p1">Ziu Zi had been working at the palace for almost a decade. It had been a blessing to avoid conscription, but he’d soon discovered that, after Ozai’s ascension, he might have been less stressed on the front lines. Ozai had been volatile, lashing out at ministers, guards, and servants alike with no warning. Plus, he’d let that little princess taunt the guards mercilessly. Some way to raise a child.</p><p class="p1">It was during the eclipse that Ziu Zi had decided his opinions on the royal family. Ozai had run away to his bunker, tail between his legs, leaving good, loyal guards like himself to tremble defenseless in the guardtowers, like sacrificial koala-lambs. The royal family cozied up, safe and happy, playing with their <em>lightning</em>, that made them oh so <em>special. </em>He’d relished the extended vacation he’d gotten after his “banishment” by the princess. Ozai’s komodo chickens had come home to roost.</p><p class="p1">Ziu Zi was skeptical, watching the new young Fire Lord rise, freshly crowned. Sure, that business with the Agni Kai years before had been <em>messed up</em>, but another little aristocrat pup? Was that really going to change anything? The conversations at the Laughing Rhino had devolved into heated debates. Some were still terrified of questioning the monarchy, of the vague threat of strict reprisal, while others scoffed that the new Fire Lord was a puppet of the Earth Kingdom, absolutely toothless. Ziu Zi wasn’t sure where he stood; the new Fire Lord had made lots of promises, and had yet to deliver on them. He didn’t really expect him to. After all, he was probably just like the rest of those pompous courtiers.</p><p class="p1">But while life outside the palace was slow changing, he’d noticed a shift in the air while on duty. Ziu Zi noticed that he’d stopped flinching when the Fire Lord rounded a corner; he’d stopped automatically casting his eyes to the floor. The new Fire Lord said <em>please</em>, and <em>thank you</em> — a low bar to clear, but after so many years of royals treating him like furniture, Ziu Zi found it refreshing.</p><p class="p1">Most importantly, Ziu Zi started to see familiar faces around town again; when he visited his friends, their sons and daughters were seated at the table, too. The rations for lamp oil and sugar stopped, and every so often he’d see a foreign ship pulled into the docks. One of the other guards always griped at seeing the gaudy colors of other nations; Ziu Zi thought that the variety was nice.</p><p class="p1">He was on his stool, sitting crosslegged, when Lieutenant Reijai rounded the corner with a guard he didn’t recognize. Ziu Zi jumped up. Usually he could relax while guarding the Fire Lord’s quarters, especially when the Fire Lord was away in meetings, but Lieutenant Reijai was nit-picky about appearances.</p><p class="p1">“Ziu Zi, you know I don’t like to see my guards slacking off,” he chided, the other guard trotting behind him. “This is Jiyu, she’s newly enlisted. I’m certain you can show her the <em>proper</em> protocols.” Lt. Reijai gave him a pointed look.</p><p class="p1">The new guard was <em>young</em>, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Ziu Zi forgot how old he’d gotten sometimes; she looked just out of school. Had he looked that young when he started?</p><p class="p1">“Good morning,” she said crisply, back stiff.</p><p class="p1">“Excellent, make sure she learns the rules — good luck,” the lieutenant said, leaving them.</p><p class="p1">When he turned out of sight, Ziu Zi eased back into his seat again.</p><p class="p1">“Oh — aren’t we not supposed to sit?” The new guard looked nervous, glancing at the hallway.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t worry about it,” Ziu Zi said, waving a hand. “Reijai is kind of a stickler for protocol, but while the Fire Lord’s gone we can relax. Save your energy for when he’s actually here.”</p><p class="p1">She relaxed gingerly, leaning against the wall on the other side of the Fire Lord’s carved double doors.</p><p class="p1">“So, now what?” she asked.</p><p class="p1">“Now, we sit around all day,” Ziu Zi said matter-of-factly, pulling out a bag of fire flakes from his pocket.</p><p class="p1">“Seriously?” Poor thing. They must have sold her on the prestige.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I know. Technically we’re here to protect the Fire Lord from rebels and assassins, but there’s really not that many rebels storming the doors these days.”</p><p class="p1">She slumped against the wall, but after a few light questions about her family, where she went to school, Jiyu opened up. Ziu Zi liked to chat with his fellow guards; it made the days go by faster.</p><p class="p1">They both had to snap to attention when the Fire Lord himself turned down the hall, robes billowing behind him. Ziu Zi thought that he seemed to be growing into them, finally; when he started, he’d looked like a teenager lost in his father’s clothes. Now, he was taller, shoulders broader — and had the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador following along beside him.</p><p class="p1">The ambassador was laughing, and the Fire Lord looked furious — that didn’t bode well. If Ozai had been wearing a scowl, Ziu Zi would have given the Fire Lord the widest berth he could manage; but this Fire Lord had a much smaller blast radius. Whatever it was, it couldn’t be <em>that </em>bad, if the ambassador was looking that pleased with himself.</p><p class="p1">Either way, the heavy doors slammed shut behind them. Jiyu gave him a confused look, and Ziu Zi just shrugged. They could hear murmuring behind the door, the ambassador’s voice barking in laughter, but not much else. Then, something crashing to the floor — Jiyu’s hand flew to the door handle.</p><p class="p1">Ziu Zi stopped her, holding up a finger.</p><p class="p1">“What?” she asked, frantic.</p><p class="p1">“Wait a second,” he said quietly.</p><p class="p1">Then, pressed close to the door like they were, they heard a moan, someone’s muffled voice, another lewd noise. Jiyu looked appalled, blushing violently. Ziu Zi just rolled his eyes.</p><p class="p1">“See?” Ziu Zi was exasperated. He returned to snacking.</p><p class="p1">“The Fire Lord and…?” she had a hand to her mouth.</p><p class="p1">“They’ve been at it for <em>months</em>,” Ziu Zi said around a mouthful of fire flakes. “We’ve got an hour or so to sit around.”</p><p class="p1">She slid to the floor, looking uncomfortable. The noises didn’t faze Ziu Zi at this point, but it was a little much for your first day of work.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">When Sokka had suggested a weekend away, Zuko knew just where to go.</p><p class="p1">Ember Island wasn’t the only place his family had erected vacation homes over the years; the volcanic mountains to the northwest of Caldera City were beautiful, the rich soil and rainy weather patterns nourishing a temperate rainforest. His grandfather had built a small house up there, nestled just a short hike from the Xin Niang Falls. Perfect.</p><p class="p1">Zuko hadn’t been able to convince his Captain of the Guard to let him travel alone, and Sokka had gotten a kick out of the carriage ride, sprawling his legs out across the padded bench and asking if Zuko would like some grapes fed to him. It didn’t matter how much Zuko protested that he’d really rather have just taken a pair of dragon moose.</p><p class="p1">They pulled to a stop, and Sokka leapt out. “We’re here!” he called, to no one in particular. “Right, this is it, I’m assuming?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko stepped out of the carriage, looking up at the Fire Nation insignia that blazed across the front door. He rolled his eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Yes, this is it.”</p><p class="p1">The guards shoo’d Sokka away as he tried to pull off his bags.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, they won’t let me help,” he complained.</p><p class="p1">Zuko sighed. “Please let us take it from here,” he asked, and at that his guards reluctantly set down the bags. There were only two; Zuko and Sokka could take care of it themselves.</p><p class="p1">They were reluctant to leave, too, until Zuko huffed, exasperated, “I survived almost a year as an enemy of the state, I think I can handle one weekend with my — my good friend.” He winced internally at the blatant lie.</p><p class="p1">The guards exchanged skeptical looks, but the carriage trundled away anyways.</p><p class="p1">They hauled themselves up the front steps, Sokka dropping his bag just over the threshold and running up the staircase.</p><p class="p1">“You said it was a cottage!” he called back. Zuko could hear his steps race around upstairs.</p><p class="p1">Zuko chuckled, picking up Sokka’s bag, too. He carried them to the biggest bedroom, the one that opened to the wrap-around porch. They’d have to shake out some new sheets, but it was mostly the way Zuko remembered it: sturdy wooden furniture, old painted wallpaper, air crisp from the forest. A few bad memories still stalked the place — a yelling match between his parents here, a stinging punishment from his father there — but Zuko was determined to brush out all the cobwebs. New memories, to paper over the old ones.</p><p class="p1">“You guys really have a lot of vacation homes, huh,” Sokka said, wandering into the room. Zuko was standing at the foot of the bed, and Sokka came up behind him, wrapping his arms around Zuko’s waist.</p><p class="p1">“This was where my parents would sleep,” Zuko commented. He meant for it to sound matter-of-fact, but it came out more bitter.</p><p class="p1">“We don’t have to sleep here, if you don’t want to. I mean, there’s plenty of other bedrooms. Like, <em>so many</em>. I don’t really care which one we pick.”</p><p class="p1">“No, I — I don’t want to be afraid of my own house. It’s mine now, technically.” Zuko placed his hands on Sokka’s, where they were planted on his stomach. Sokka rested his chin on Zuko’s shoulder. <em>He really has gotten a little taller.</em></p><p class="p1">“Okay,” Sokka said simply. “We should probably change the sheets, though. These look a little dusty.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, obviously.”</p><p class="p1">“Alright, my little hot pot,” Sokka said, making for the door again, “point me to the linen closet.”</p><p class="p1">“You know, I don’t actually don’t know where it is.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka barked a laugh. “You pampered little prince. Come on, let’s go figure it out. I’ll teach you how to make a bed yourself.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Even though Sokka could make do with a pot and an open fire, it was nice to be able to cook with the top-of-the-line tools he’d found stashed in the kitchen. Zuko had offered to help, but after he burned the first sea raven egg, Sokka had taken over. No need to waste perfectly good eggs. An egg, a bun, a steaming cup of tea; it wasn’t the most complicated breakfast, but when Sokka placed it in front of Zuko, he’d looked up at him like Sokka had worked magic.</p><p class="p1">“You just gotta add a few spices, that’s all,” Sokka had said, feeling oddly shy. He wasn’t <em>that</em> good of a cook, he just knew the basics. Enough to keep himself fed, anyway.</p><p class="p1">It was incredible, having nothing to do at all. They’d explored the house, finding old family trinkets, dusty boxes of clutter, half-packed up, and a small window in the attic overlooking a crevice in the roof. Zuko had been the one to notice the nest tucked into the crevice, home to a sparrowkeet. They lounged around, Sokka finding new scraps of wood to practice his whittling on, Zuko writing, some notes for later — Sokka assumed. Something Fire Lord-y. Every so often, Sokka would happen to look up at the same time as Zuko, catch his eye, that small smile Zuko let himself show, and then they’d return to their pastimes. It was a comfortable silence, each knowing that the other was just happy to feel them nearby.</p><p class="p1">Sokka had gotten restless, setting down another chunk of wood and creeping up behind Zuko to peek at what he was writing.</p><p class="p1">“Doing work, my dearest candlewick?” Sokka asked, wrapping his hands around Zuko’s shoulders. “You should put the Fire Lording business away and pay attention to me.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” he said, covering it with a hand. “I’m not doing work.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm? What are you hiding?” Sokka pulled lightly at his hand, but Zuko just crumpled up the paper. “Are you keeping secrets from me?”</p><p class="p1">“No.” Zuko said, a nervous bite to his voice. “It’s just — just a hobby. I’m not good at it.”</p><p class="p1">“A secret hobby?” Sokka was almost laughing, he was so delighted. “Will you tell me about your secret hobby?” He pressed a kiss to the top of Zuko’s head, and Zuko sighed.</p><p class="p1">He un-crumpled the paper in his hands, smoothing it out on the desk in front of them.</p><p class="p1">“It’s just some silly poetry,” Zuko mumbled. “I know it probably sounds stupid, but it helps me. Like an outlet.”</p><p class="p1">“I love poetry!” Sokka exclaimed. “I went to a poetry house back in Ba Sing Se. They were mean, but that’s besides the point.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka read over the lines,</p><p class="p1">
  <em> Softly, spring blooms fell,<br/>When on spring waves he appeared,<br/>Laugh like a sweet creek.</em>
</p><p class="p1">“That’s pretty. I like the imagery. What’s it about?” Sokka asked.</p><p class="p1">“It’s — I thought it was obvious?”</p><p class="p1">“Is it about spring?”</p><p class="p1">“It’s about you, dumbass.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh!” Sokka laughed. “It’s about me?” He planted another kiss on Zuko’s head. “I’m sorry. I get it now. Like, I first got here in the spring, I see, I see.” He looked over the lines again. “My laugh sounds like a creek?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko groaned. “It’s supposed to be, like. A metaphor? Forget it, it’s stupid.” He moved to crumple it again, but Sokka snatched it.</p><p class="p1">“No, I wanna keep it. I love it. You can’t have it anymore.” He folded it carefully, tucking it into his pocket.</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned, looking up at him with a shy look that made Sokka’s throat almost close up.</p><p class="p1">“Will you write me some more? I’d love more,” Sokka said, holding Zuko’s face in his hands.</p><p class="p1">Zuko pulled Sokka down into a kiss.</p><p class="p1">“I’ll write you some more, but only because you asked.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">They were out on the upstairs porch, sprawled across a lounge chair with Sokka’s head on Zuko’s chest. It was calming, the breeze on his face and the weight of Sokka’s body on his. The forest was whispering, and when they were quiet like this, they could hear animals chirp to each other.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was sketching a sparrowkeet when he brought it up: “Remember the gala?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko hummed.</p><p class="p1">“You looked amazing.”</p><p class="p1">“Thank you, Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">“And you asked me to fuck you?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko blushed. “Yes, I remember, Sokka. Unfortunately.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you — do you still want me to?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko paused. After the incident, and after he’d gotten over his embarrassment, he’d taken Sokka’s lead and decided he wanted to do it right. So he’d done some… research. He knew, of course, the bare mechanics of what was supposed to happen — growing up, he’d heard a lewd comment here, a bawdy joke there — and he knew he liked when Sokka touched him down <em>there</em>, but, if he was being honest with himself, he was clueless of the details of the whole thing. So he’d skulked around the library, late at night after Sokka had gone off to bed, flicking through books to find <em>something, anything</em>. Hoping to find just a little advice.</p><p class="p1">He’d almost given up, finding only fleeting mentions of non-straight men, if that, until he’d cracked open a crusty old book, shoved into the back of a shelf. It had smelled like a musty cellar and was burned around one edge, but regardless it was a godsend; an old doctor’s journal, recounting his time “treating” people who wished to be “cured” of their attractions. It made Zuko grimace, the way the author talked about his patients like an anthropologist, fascinated by their “unnatural” habits, but. He still had the information Zuko needed.</p><p class="p1">“It’s okay if you don’t want to, anymore. I know you were drunk when you said —”</p><p class="p1">“No, I — I still want you to.”</p><p class="p1">“You sure?”</p><p class="p1">“Mm-hmm.” The thought of it made Zuko’s skin prickle. “I did some uh, research. To figure out how to do it right.”</p><p class="p1">“Hmm, what did you find out?” Sokka was tracing his fingers over Zuko’s knuckles.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, um.” He felt awkward saying it out loud. “I should um… clean myself. Probably.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re supposed to take a bath?”</p><p class="p1">“No, like — ugh, I don’t really wanna say it.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, if I’m gonna fuck you we should just talk about it.”</p><p class="p1">“Like, inside me.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh! Oh. Sure.” Sokka chuckled. “You shouldn’t be embarrassed about it.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I know. Still am, though. Still feels… weird, to say it.” He took a breath. “There wasn’t much to go on, when I looked for it. I thought for a while there that they really <em>had</em> burned everything about — about us.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka threaded his fingers between Zuko’s and squeezed.</p><p class="p1">“I’m sorry. I know it’s hard.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s voice was so soft and sweet it was going to make Zuko teary, and he didn’t want to kill the mood, so he breezed past the subject.</p><p class="p1">“Anyways, I feel like I’m ready. I’ve thought about doing it for a while. Also, we should use a lot of uhm, <em>lubricant</em>. And go slowly.”</p><p class="p1">“I’ll go as slow as you want.”</p><p class="p1">“I know.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, tonight, then?” Sokka seemed so nonchalant about it.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was apprehensive the rest of the day, body tense with equal parts excitement and nervousness. He was tightly wound, picking at his dinner, a steaming fish that Sokka had caught for them. He felt like each time he caught Sokka’s eyes he would snap like a bowstring.</p><p class="p1">Finally, he had himself barricaded in the bathroom alone. He went about it methodically, following the details he’d committed to memory, cleaning himself carefully. He was sure it was clumsy and half-wrong, but he tried his best. He pulled a cotton bathrobe around himself, taking a steadying breath before peeking his head out the door.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was sprawled across the covers, and grinned when he saw Zuko poke his head out. Zuko held the cotton robe around him, padding over to the bed.</p><p class="p1">“Hey,” Zuko said, sheepishly.</p><p class="p1">“Hey,” Sokka replied, pulling Zuko down onto the bed with him. “Have I ever mentioned how hot you are?” He ran his hands over Zuko’s shoulders, pushing back the robe.</p><p class="p1">“You’ve mentioned it once or twice.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, I should let you know more often. So fucking sexy,” he murmured, pressing kisses to the skin between Zuko’s neck and shoulder. Ever since Zuko had told Sokka how much he liked Sokka talking in the bedroom, Sokka had played it up, starting to give Zuko little compliments and instructions.</p><p class="p1">“Take this off,” Sokka said, pulling at the robe, so Zuko obliged. He felt oddly exposed, laying there completely naked while Sokka was still clothed, so he pulled at the fasteners of Sokka’s shirt impatiently.</p><p class="p1">“Your turn,” he said, giving Sokka a small smile. Sokka kissed him, fingers undoing his shirt as he did. Zuko felt the tension in his body melt away a touch, sinking his hands into Sokka’s hair, letting him press the kiss deeper. Sokka shrugged his shirt off, hands then free to skate over the lines of Zuko’s sides, over his chest and down his stomach, brushing lightly over the puckered skin of his lightning scar.</p><p class="p1">“Can’t believe I’m with you,” Sokka said into the kiss, quiet, like a secret. “Get to kiss you, touch you…” His mouth moved to Zuko’s cheek, along the scar there, up to the spot just below his ear that made Zuko squirm. He treated Zuko’s scars with such tenderness, it always made Zuko’s chest tighten, made his heart shudder. At first he’d shied away, but he was slowly, slowly getting better at receiving Sokka’s gentle care. He wanted to, desperately.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s mouth was on his neck, tongue and teeth scraping over the skin in that delicious way that made Zuko’s hips twist. His breaths came faster, and he swallowed around a moan when Sokka nipped at the curve of his shoulder. Zuko fumbled with the tie to Sokka’s trousers.</p><p class="p1">“I love hearing those noises you make,” Sokka said, moving to the base of Zuko’s throat. “You have no idea how fucking hot you sound.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko palmed Sokka through his trousers, feeling the hard length of him.</p><p class="p1">“I think I have some idea,” Zuko rumbled, and Sokka laughed, but drew away and settled himself between Zuko’s thighs.</p><p class="p1">Zuko leaned up, propping himself up with his elbows. Watching Sokka would be the best part, if it wasn’t for the way his tongue felt.</p><p class="p1">Then Sokka’s mouth was kissing his thighs, and Zuko’s hips tilted, hoping for more. Sokka was looking up at him with bright eyes, and he expected that mouth on his cock, but Sokka moved lower, hands pushing Zuko’s knees up. His stomach rolled, and then he felt Sokka’s slick tongue move just there, right over his hole, a little brush at first.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Spirits</em>, Sokka,” he breathed, trying to keep his hips still, back twisting. Sokka moaned something Zuko didn’t catch, tongue far more busy licking him open. Zuko’s knees fell to rest on Sokka’s shoulders. It was toe-curling, the wet heat of Sokka’s mouth, and whatever tension was left in Zuko’s body left for good. He felt a little leak of precum against his stomach, and his hand went to tug at his cock. Sokka’s eyebrow arched, but he let him do it.</p><p class="p1">Just when Zuko thought he was well on his way to coming, Sokka stopped, placing a hand over Zuko’s to still it.</p><p class="p1">“You’re close, aren’t you?” he asked, gently pulling Zuko’s hand away. Zuko whined, and Sokka replied, “don’t want this to end too early,” tutting playfully.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s head fell back. “Ah, fuck you.” He was throbbing, skin hot all over.</p><p class="p1">“You will, baby, but first…” Sokka left the bed, crouching over their bags to rummage through. Zuko watched him impatiently. He returned with a jar of lotion, slicking up his fingers, grinning wickedly.</p><p class="p1">Then a finger was pressing inside, slow at first, and Zuko’s eyes flew shut. A gasp threaded its way out of him, and he heard Sokka chuckle.</p><p class="p1">“Be as loud as you want, Zuko. There’s no one to hear us for miles around.”</p><p class="p1">No matter how many times Sokka asked him to let loose, Zuko still had trouble not choking back his moans. It was a force of habit.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was working one finger, then a second one, inside, sending little electric zings up his spine. He couldn’t help the little gasps and moans; his legs felt weak and shaky.</p><p class="p1">“Please, more,” Zuko begged, hips tilting down onto Sokka’s fingers.</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked delighted. “You want another?” Zuko whimpered, nodding his head, eyes screwed shut. “Oh, look at you,” Sokka said, slipping another in, “so eager for me. Just begging for more to open you up.” Sokka’s words sent shivers racing up Zuko’s body to his cheeks. “You look so good, fucking down onto my fingers like this.” Sokka let out a moan, fingers picking up their pace, “This good?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko nodded furiously. His head rolled to the side, breathing heavily, wanting to touch his cock but knowing if he did he would burst. He opened his eyes, looking to Sokka. His mouth was parted, panting, eyes glazed, watching Zuko intently.</p><p class="p1">“Please, Sokka, I’m gonna — I just want you, please —”</p><p class="p1">“You feel ready?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, yeah, I’m ready, please.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka nodded, sitting up, reaching for the jar of lotion. It was a welcome respite, to lay untouched for a moment. Zuko tried to catch his breath, suddenly apprehensive again. Sokka took a breath, smoothing lotion over himself, slick fingers guiding himself to press against Zuko’s entrance. He caught Zuko’s eyes, and Zuko must have looked frantic, because Sokka paused.</p><p class="p1">“Just let me know if you want to stop, okay baby?” Sokka swallowed, chest heaving.</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm. Keep going, please Sokka.” Zuko’s hands curled in the covers.</p><p class="p1">He did, and Zuko’s eyes shut against the burn, just on the good side of painful. Sokka went agonizingly slow, taking little strokes as Zuko tried to relax.</p><p class="p1">“Okay? Like that? Feels good?” Sokka kept asking, one hand smoothing over the curve of Zuko’s waist, and Zuko kept nodding, so Sokka kept going.</p><p class="p1">Then the burn was turning to something different, a feeling deep in his pelvis that made Zuko feel delirious. His hips rolled of their own accord, and Sokka moved deeper, following Zuko’s lead, and that drew a loud moan from Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“Fucking… I can’t —” Sokka breathed, picking up his pace, leaning down on his hands, pressed into the mattress on either side of Zuko.</p><p class="p1">Zuko knew he was going to be embarrassed later, of the absolutely ridiculous sounds coming out of him, but he couldn’t find the wherewithal to care when he felt so filled, and then Sokka was tilting his hips back and fitting one of Zuko’s legs around his elbow, and Zuko’s moans shot up an octave.</p><p class="p1">“That’s right, moan for me,” Sokka panted, hips snapping into him. “Doing so good for me, so fucking good, just look at you — so hot and tight —” Every word wrung another pained whimper out of Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, please, I need…” he couldn’t find the words.</p><p class="p1">“What do you need, baby?” Sokka slowed into long, slow strokes.</p><p class="p1">“I wanna come,” he gasped. “Please, I wanna —”</p><p class="p1">“Touch you?”</p><p class="p1">“Touch myself.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka nodded, leaning back to give Zuko room. Zuko wrapped a hand around himself, sighing at the relief of having a hand there after going so long untouched. His rhythm faltered as Sokka picked up his pace again, each stroke brushing against that place inside him that made Zuko’s back arch.</p><p class="p1">Words were falling out of Zuko’s mouth out of order, a stream-of-consciousness babble. “Like that, there, huh, Sokka — make me feel — ’s so good, gonna, gonna come, love it, love y—” and Zuko’s attention snapped back just in time, “love y— your cock,” Zuko fumbled.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Fuck</em> you look amazing,” Sokka said, cheeks ruddy. “Can’t wait to see you come, all spread out on my cock —” and that sent Zuko over the edge, hips jerking, orgasm spilling onto his stomach and chest. He felt that one deep inside him, washing over him in waves of heat, rather than the sharp snap he was used to. Sokka fucked him through it, murmuring something about how good he was, how hot he looked. Zuko couldn’t focus on his words. Coming down from it left Zuko oversensitive, the stimulation from Sokka thrusting into him taking on a dull ache.</p><p class="p1">He squirmed, but didn’t say anything, couldn’t say anything when Sokka was looking down at him like that with glazed eyes.</p><p class="p1">“I’m close, Zuko, so close,” he groaned, and his thrusts got shallower, faster.</p><p class="p1">“Want you to come in me,” Zuko managed to get out. “Want it so bad —” and Sokka cut him off with a strained cry, brow furrowed, a final snap of his hips.</p><p class="p1">“I — holy shit,” Sokka said, breathless, laughing a little. He eased himself out of Zuko, leaning back. “Hold on,” he said, leaving to gather a few damp towels for them.</p><p class="p1">“Here,” he breathed, offering one to Zuko. Zuko wiped across his stomach, Sokka leaning between his legs again.</p><p class="p1">“That was — something else,” Sokka murmured, wiping at Zuko. The wet cloth was startlingly cool against his hot skin, but he found it soothing.</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm,” Zuko hummed. He felt a little dazed, honestly, being thrust down to earth again so suddenly.</p><p class="p1">“You liked it?” Sokka asked, rubbing a hand over Zuko’s inner thigh.</p><p class="p1">Zuko hummed again as Sokka finished cleaning him, tossing the soiled towel to the floor. Zuko followed suit, and Sokka flopped onto his side next to Zuko, pulling a thin blanket over them.</p><p class="p1">He propped his head up on his hand, leaning over Zuko to give his lips a soft kiss.</p><p class="p1">“That was good, yeah?” It was one of the things Zuko liked the most about being with Sokka, the incessant checking in and confirmations that yes, Zuko was happy. He loved the attention, the way Sokka would light up when Zuko confirmed it for him.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Liked it a lot,” Zuko said, sighing at the soft trace of Sokka’s fingers across his chest. He reached a hand up to cup Sokka’s jaw.</p><p class="p1">“I’m glad you liked it. It didn’t hurt?”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, a little. But,” Zuko amended when he saw Sokka’s worried look, “only at first. After that, it just felt good.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay.”</p><p class="p1">“Just needed to get used to it.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Sokka dipped down for a slow, open-mouthed kiss. “What does it feel like?” he asked, pausing.</p><p class="p1">“Oh.” Zuko thought. “Well. Kind of like fingers do, but like… more?”</p><p class="p1">“Very descriptive.”</p><p class="p1">“Shut up. It’s like… more solid. I don’t know.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Zuko pulled Sokka in for another kiss.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko was right, the walk was worth it. They’d left just before sundown, Sokka following along behind him as Zuko led him through the trees, the orange sun setting the forest on fire. It had only been a short walk, maybe ten minutes, following a shady path, before they emerged into a clearing carpeted with thick moss.</p><p class="p1">The sun had dipped below the horizon, and they were watching the stars twinkle into view, laid out next to each other on the moss. Luckily Zuko had the foresight to bring a thin blanket to lay back on.</p><p class="p1">“You know, I sometimes I miss the camping,” Sokka said, fingers twined between Zuko’s.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, just. The fresh air, having everyone together. It was good.”</p><p class="p1">“When I wasn’t trying to capture you,” Zuko grumbled.</p><p class="p1">Sokka smacked his side lightly. “How many times do we have to tell you that you’re forgiven?”</p><p class="p1">“More, I guess.” Sokka smacked him again. “I wish I’d figured myself out sooner.”</p><p class="p1">“It took as long as it needed to take,” Sokka said, gripping Zuko’s hand.</p><p class="p1">“Maybe.”</p><p class="p1">“And in the end, you figured yourself out.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was silent, pulling their clasped hands up to press a kiss to the back of Sokka’s hand.</p><p class="p1">“You know, I don’t know many of the constellations here,” Sokka said softly.</p><p class="p1">“Really?”</p><p class="p1">“Never needed to learn these ones.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you see that star, the really bright one?” Zuko pointed. “And the four smaller stars drifting down, like a tail?” Sokka nodded. “That’s the heron, see, these two stars form the beak. It points straight north.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko pointed out a few more, the crossbow, the deer, the peach blossom, tracing the connections with his fingertip. Sokka’s fingers fiddled with a trinket in his pocket.</p><p class="p1">“I have something for you,” he said, interrupting another explanation of the myth of the sky-fox.</p><p class="p1">“Oh?”</p><p class="p1">“Here.” Sokka pulled the carving out of his pocket, a little wooden bird. “It’s a sparrowkeet. Like the ones that live on the roof.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned it in his fingers.</p><p class="p1">“It’s lovely. Thank you, Sokka.” Zuko tucked the carving into a pocket, pressing a quick kiss to Sokka’s cheek. “You’re getting really good at carving, you know.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka mumbled something about practicing. His skin tickled where Zuko had kissed it, and his stomach swooped, and with a jolt it became blindingly clear to Sokka: he was in deep. Like, irreparably deep. Like, like-like. <em>Love.</em> As soon the thought appeared in his mind, it crystallized: he’d do anything to make sure Zuko was okay. Of course he would. No matter what happened after this, if they fought, if they stopped seeing each other, if Zuko cast him aside for someone else — fuck that thought — he’d have to make sure Zuko was okay. <em>Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka ran a thumb over the curve of Zuko’s wrist, knowing he was going to forget everything Zuko was teaching him. His chest was tight. The next morning, they’d have to go back. It was a shame, because for a second — just a second — Sokka had forgotten who they were, who they had to be. Zuko had to put on those robes again, Sokka had to stop holding his hand, they had to pretend they didn’t mean anything more to each other than <em>just good friends</em>.</p><p class="p1">Who were they kidding? Sokka had never felt like such a liar, spending his days faking politeness to decrepit old men, faking a platonic relationship with the Fire Lord, and faking an uneventful visit in his letters to his friends. He was lying to himself about the reason he was staying away from home for so long; he was lying to his father. It wasn’t for diplomatic purposes; it may have started that way, right at the beginning, but that ship had long since sailed. Or rather, Sokka’s ship <em>should</em> have long since sailed.</p><p class="p1">And most damning of all… he was lying to Suki. He could try to tell himself, well, we didn’t talk about being exclusive all he wanted, but he knew, deep in his gut… <em>I’m betraying her. She’s my… she was my girlfriend. I’m a liar. I left her and now I’m lying to her. I’m lying to Zuko. I still feel — you can’t just stop caring for someone. I should tell him. I should. It would break his heart. I love… I love him. I can’t tell him. He deserves to know. Suki deserves to know. I love him. </em>He didn’t want to think about what his gut was telling him: whatever this was with Zuko, it wasn’t destined to last. He was on borrowed time.</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned his head to smile at Sokka, relaxed, happy, holding tight to Sokka’s hand in his, then looked back up at the stars, pointing to another constellation. Sokka watched Zuko’s face, the stars reflected in his pupils, the pull of his smile at the corners of his eyes. If he couldn’t have him forever, at the very least, Sokka could keep that memory, tight to his heart.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>No one ~gets~ Zuko's artistry, okay?</p><p>I tried my best to explain how they would know anything about bottoming, but clearly the Fire Nation needs to institute some more inclusive sex ed. As per uzh, please correct me on any inaccuracies.</p><p>Also, there will be a few familiar faces in the next chapter!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Indiscreet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Aang and Katara come to visit Caldera City.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm sorry I haven't updated this in a while, I had to get some other WIPs out of my system first, but now I can focus on my main dudes. Anyways, here's some juicy drama, enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka’s feet couldn’t carry him across the palace flagstones fast enough. He wheeled around a corner, almost running over a guard.</p><p class="p1">“Sorry! My bad!” Sokka called over his shoulder. Could you blame him? He was just excited to see his sister.</p><p class="p1">And there they were, Aang giving Appa a phoenix-fruit treat, Katara stretching her arms after the long journey. Sokka barreled head-long toward them, calling out a greeting.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka!” He almost knocked Katara to the ground, wrapping her in a big platypus-bear hug. “You’re still here. In your last letter, you said you’d be heading home soon. I assumed you’d already left.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, uh…” Sokka feigned a casual air. “Some stuff came up. Y’know, diplomatic snags. And all that.”</p><p class="p1">“Huh.” Katara shrugged, shouldering a pack.</p><p class="p1">“Well, <em>I’m</em> happy to see you!” Aang chirped, throwing an arm around Katara’s shoulders. “It’s been so long.”</p><p class="p1">“Of course I’m happy to see you, too, Sokka,” Katara said, rolling her eyes at Aang, a small smile at her mouth.</p><p class="p1">“How have you <em>been</em>, buddy?” Aang was squeezing Sokka in a tight hug.</p><p class="p1">“Fine,” Sokka squeaked. Aang’s grip was stronger than he remembered, and — huh, Aang had gone through a bit of a growth spurt, <em>again. </em>In the years since the war ended, Aang had really shot up, and it wouldn’t be long before Aang was taller than Sokka.</p><p class="p1">Appa lowed his own greeting to Sokka, but was too pre-occupied with the sweetgrass and melons set before him by the palace servants to bother with giving Sokka one of those wet licks.</p><p class="p1">“I thought you guys were just coming for the anniversary,” Sokka said. The Fire Nation holiday season was beginning to get underway, but the anniversary itself wasn’t for another few weeks.</p><p class="p1">“Things were starting to get on the right track again in the colonies, so we thought we’d swing by a bit early,” Aang said. “Katara was getting tired of Yu Dao, anyways.” Sokka raised an eyebrow at her.</p><p class="p1">“There weren’t a lot of good spots to practice waterbending,” Katara explained. “I can make do, but like. It wasn’t <em>fun</em>.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sure you’ll find a puddle or two around here,” Sokka teased, and Katara gave him a look, but she was still smiling.</p><p class="p1">Sokka gathered up a few bundles of supplies, and the three of them walked toward the palace, Appa lumbering along behind them, a gaggle of servants flitting around nervously.</p><p class="p1">“So, how’s the diplomacy been going, <em>Ambassador? </em>You said you had some snags?” Aang elbowed Sokka lightly.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, uh…” Sokka had to think for a moment. <em>Fuck. What “snags” have I had? I didn’t think this through. </em>“I’m still in, uh, some trade negotiations! For our tribe. Minister Chao is still lowballing me, the old coot.” <em>Not a total lie. Do I have to be here for that? Not really, but.</em></p><p class="p1">“I’m sure you’ll get a good deal in the end. You’re Ambassador Sokka, after all.” Aang always had such confidence in him.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I guess.”</p><p class="p1">If he was being honest with himself, trade negotiations hadn’t been at the forefront of Sokka’s mind for… a long time. Months? He couldn’t be sure when <em>exactly</em> his primary reason for staying in Caldera City had slid from above-the-board diplomacy to kissing a certain head of state behind closed doors, but here he was anyway.</p><p class="p1">And now Aang and Katara were here, too… seeing them in person, chatting happily and teasing him just like they always did, was like a bucket of cold water dumped over Sokka’s head. He’d been holed up in that vast palace, playing pretend… <em>as if me and Zuko being together won’t change everything. </em>Sokka knew in his gut that it wouldn’t be a change for the better.</p><p class="p1">“Everything’s still good back home?” Katara asked, off-handedly. “Dad’s been writing me, but he hasn’t mentioned much. I guess the restoration is still on track?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, yep. Yeah, he’s been keeping me updated. Construction is going well. I left him with all my notes, so.”</p><p class="p1">“With <em>your</em> handwriting? Can he even read it?” Katara teased.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, you read my letters just fine, don’t you? I worked really hard on the plans, I color-coded them and everything.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I’m just giving you a hard time.” His sister grinned.</p><p class="p1">They looped around into the residential wing of the palace. A servant appeared at their side.</p><p class="p1">“This way, Avatar Aang, Master Katara. May I, uhm, take your things?” he fussed.</p><p class="p1">“We’re just fine, thank you,” Aang said politely.</p><p class="p1">“Did you hear that, Sokka? <em>Master</em> Katara.”</p><p class="p1">“Katara, you’ve been a bending master for like, years.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, it’s nice to be appreciated sometimes. Okay?”</p><p class="p1">They were led into a set of guest chambers, and Aang immediately dropped his bundles off at the doorway, leaping up and floating down onto the broad featherbed.</p><p class="p1">“Aah, it’s good to be here. So comfy…”</p><p class="p1">Katara put her hands on her hips, smirking. “So much for a simple monk.”</p><p class="p1">“Whaaat? Monks can appreciate comfort, too.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka dropped into a plush chair, resting a leg across the armrest. He realized he’d gotten used to the cushy accommodations… he really had been at the palace for a while, hadn’t he? He’d gotten so caught up in the meetings, the pampering, how broad Zuko’s shoulders had gotten… <em>fuck, I’m getting distracted again. How am I gonna keep this under wraps?</em> They hadn’t talked yet about whether or not they’d tell their friends. <em>I thought I had another couple weeks to plan this out. Shit. I gotta go find him. We gotta get our stories straight — straight, heh. Shit, Sokka, focus. </em></p><p class="p1">He leapt up, bidding his friends goodbye for the moment.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, okay. We’ll… see you at dinner, I guess?” Katara offered.</p><p class="p1">“Yep, yep. See you then. Gotta go, I have some, uh. Diplomatic stuff I forgot about. Really need to get on that.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“My Lord, I admire your optimism and faith in the colonists’ goodwill, but —”</p><p class="p1">“Would you stop with the sweet talk, for once?”</p><p class="p1">“My Lord!”</p><p class="p1">“Look, I’m sorry —” Zuko sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Forgive my outburst. What I mean is, you don’t have to sugarcoat things. You’re my Minister of Intelligence for a reason. I actually <em>want</em> to hear your opinion.”</p><p class="p1">The man on the other side of the desk looked startled. Zuko had decided to take this meeting in his study, spare himself the trouble of appearing in his formal robes, and just cut to the chase. After a few years on the throne he was getting tired of the theatrics, and would rather just get to the business of governing. He was the Fire Lord, after all — why should he have to pander to others’ vision of him?</p><p class="p1">The minister cleared his throat. “Well. To be blunt… our hold is slipping.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s kind of the point, isn’t it? To decolonize?”</p><p class="p1">“Your Highness, that’s not what I mean. There’s whispers, still just rumors… the colonial governors are discontented. They might not follow orders for much longer. The dissent is still just implied, no outright rebellion yet, but — I worry that we are losing control of the situation.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko considered the papers in front of them, the maps with scrawled notes and the ledgers of colonial coffers.</p><p class="p1">“Rebellion…” he started, then paused.</p><p class="p1">“My sources tell me that the colonists believe they are being punished for following orders. Pushed around.”</p><p class="p1">“They need an incentive,” Zuko mused. “Something to draw them back to the mainland.”</p><p class="p1">“As it stands, colonists generally fare worse after returning. They don’t like giving up their property.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm. I’ll have to discuss the issue further with the Minister of Finance.”</p><p class="p1">“If I may… propaganda usually helps.”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Propaganda?</em>”</p><p class="p1">“Think of it as… public relations. Something to convince the colonists they belong back in the homeland. Nothing like a little myth-making to sway the people’s opinion.”</p><p class="p1">“Maybe…”</p><p class="p1">“I’ll have my staff draw together some mock-ups —”</p><p class="p1">The door to the study burst open, and Zuko’s eyes snapped up to see Sokka barreling through, startled guards visible in the doorway.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka — <em>Ambassador</em>, I’m in a meeting —”</p><p class="p1">“Oh shit — ugh, excuse my language. Sorry, sorry.” The minister looked slightly disgruntled. “I thought you’d finished already, I thought — sorry. I’ll just, uhm, wait outside —”</p><p class="p1">The slim, wiry Minister of Intelligence stood, gathering a few scrolls brusquely.</p><p class="p1">“Our meeting was just adjourning. The Fire Lord was very gracious.” He stepped toward the open door. “I know better than to get in the way of the Fire Lord spending time with his ambassador,” and then he was gone down the hallway.</p><p class="p1">Sokka snorted. “Your <em>face</em>,” he snickered, and Zuko could feel his cheeks burn.</p><p class="p1">“What was <em>that </em>about?” Zuko said, gesturing at the door. “I’m not — you’re not — we’re —”</p><p class="p1">“We’re not as subtle as you think we are,” Sokka finished for him, shutting the doors. “Which, by the way, is what I wanted to talk to you about.”</p><p class="p1">“What is it? Are the guards still gossiping? It’s… it’s harmless,” Zuko said, trying to convince himself.</p><p class="p1">“No, Zuko — Aang and Katara just got here.”</p><p class="p1">“<em>What? </em>Why didn’t anyone tell me?”</p><p class="p1">“You were in a meeting —”</p><p class="p1">“That doesn’t matter!”</p><p class="p1">“Well, I’m here telling you now, aren’t I?” Sokka stepped closer, voice hushed. “Look, I know they got here earlier than expected, and we haven’t really talked about this yet —”</p><p class="p1">“I can’t believe I wasn’t there to greet them. Where are they?”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, listen to me. We gotta figure out what we’re gonna do about —” Sokka gestured between their chests, “— this.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko bristled. “What is there to do?”</p><p class="p1">“Come on, you know what I mean. They don’t — they don’t know.” Sokka paused, looking worried. “Like, should we tell them?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt the hairs on his skin rise, in hesitation or fear or anger he couldn’t quite tell.</p><p class="p1">“Everyone knows already, Sokka. Was I the only one that heard that joke? They all know what I am.”</p><p class="p1">“What you <em>are?</em>” Sokka looked surprised. “What does <em>that</em> mean?”</p><p class="p1">“I know what they must think of me! I’m not stupid. I grew up here, Sokka.” Zuko could feel his voice turning sour, and he hated it, he <em>hated</em> the rotten feeling in his stomach, but he couldn’t keep the veneer up. Not around Sokka, too. “I’ve heard all the comments about men like me. Calling them nasty, perverts, a disgrace to the <em>Fire Nation</em>.” The last words came out mocking, bitter.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s eyes were wide, and his mouth dropped open.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, I’m —”</p><p class="p1">“Like, what’s the point of even keeping it a secret, now? You, you —”</p><p class="p1">“What <em>about</em> me, Zuko?” Sokka snapped, and <em>that</em> stung worse than any of the jokes. “I’m ‘men like you’, too.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s not what I meant.”</p><p class="p1">“Then, what do you mean?”</p><p class="p1">“I’m not talking about <em>you!</em> I <em>love </em>you.” Zuko clapped a hand over his mouth. <em>Shit, shit, I’ve ruined it. I’ve ruined the whole thing.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka was speechless for a second, and then he huffed, “Well, yeah, I love you, too,” like they’d already talked about it a million times, like it was a fact you could look up in an encyclopedia.</p><p class="p1">Zuko reached out and grabbed Sokka’s hand on an impulse, before he could think about it, and just that touch made him feel tethered again.</p><p class="p1">“Of course I’m not talking about you,” he said, and Sokka closed the distance between them, tucking his chin over Zuko’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“I know,” Sokka murmured. “I know you’re not.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sorry. I don’t know how I’m supposed to do this. There’s no rulebook, and there’s rulebooks for everything else about being the Fire Lord.”</p><p class="p1">“Listen, all that means is that you get to make up the rules. You get to decide how you want to do this.” Sokka squeezed him tight. “You’re the <em>Fire Lord</em>. Who’s gonna order around the Fire Lord?”</p><p class="p1">“You, sometimes.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka laughed. “Only when you ask me to.”</p><p class="p1">He pulled back, considering Zuko’s face. It made Zuko feel all squishy inside, when Sokka looked at him like that, like he was a glass goblet that Sokka was focused on not dropping.</p><p class="p1">“That still leaves us with the problem of Aang and Katara,” Sokka said gently.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah…”</p><p class="p1">“I know it might be a moot point, but I think we should try to stay on the down-low for a little longer. At least, I don’t want Aang and Katara to know yet.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s stomach twisted. <em>Is he embarrassed of me? Katara would flip…</em></p><p class="p1">“Because, I know that if they find out, they’ll tell everyone else, too, and — I want to tell Suki myself.”</p><p class="p1">Another twist in Zuko’s stomach, harder and tighter. <em>Suki. She was always so kind to me, even after what I did to her village… I’m horrible. She’ll hate me, and I’ll deserve it.</em></p><p class="p1">“I understand,” Zuko said, quietly, clutching Sokka’s hand.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Katara was finally getting used to the palace. It had taken lots of visits, over the years, but gradually she had stopped feeling like an intruder every time she entered a room. Aang was right, it just took time. Still… Katara generally avoided the receiving courtyard, that broad open place where she’d almost had to watch Zuko slip away in front of her, where Azula had cackled down at her from the rooftops and singed the tips of her hair. What was the point of going there, anyways? It’s not like Zuko ever used it for any events.</p><p class="p1">The bathhouse was Katara’s favorite part of the palace, and she made sure to stop by before dinner. She needed a good soak after spending so long on the go. She loved Aang, and she loved Appa, but there was nothing quite like a thorough pampering after a long journey.</p><p class="p1">There were a few different pools, a steaming hot one, a cool one, even a mud bath that Katara took full advantage of. She was relaxing in the hot pool, bending a rivulet lazily around her head, hair shampooed and tied up in a towel, when a female servant poked her head in through the steam.</p><p class="p1">“Master Katara, my apologies for disturbing you, but — your brother inquired when you would be arriving to dinner?”</p><p class="p1">She sat up, water splashing around her. “What time is it?”</p><p class="p1">“Half past six.”</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, I’m late. Tell them I’m on my way right now.”</p><p class="p1">The servant gave a quick nod and disappeared.</p><p class="p1">Katara dressed quickly, hair damp on her back as she rushed to the Fire Lord’s apartments. With just the four of them, they’d decided not to bother with the formal dining room. The dishes were already set out, waiting on the little dining table, when Katara walked through the door.</p><p class="p1">“Finally,” Sokka sighed, immediately digging into his meal.</p><p class="p1">“Did you have a nice bath?” Aang asked, pressing a light kiss to her cheek as she sat, pulling in her chair.</p><p class="p1">“It was lovely. Sorry I lost track of time.”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t apologize. I’m glad you got a chance to relax,” Zuko said. He tucked in as well, and then Katara turned her attention to her own meal, which smelled divine.</p><p class="p1">“This looks amazing, Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">“The cooks really outdid themselves tonight. I think it’s because I told them Aang was here; I asked them to be sure to make something vegetarian for you.”</p><p class="p1">“Aw thanks! It really does look good,” Aang said, popping a sauce-covered sweetpepper into his mouth. “Tastes good, too.”</p><p class="p1">They all dug in, and Katara let Aang fill the other two in on their adventures darting around the Earth Kingdom. They’d run into some hiccups, here and there, but mostly Aang just wanted to talk about riding the elephant koi again.</p><p class="p1">“You visited Kyoshi Island?” Sokka said, surprised.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, we stopped by. We said hi to Suki!” Aang chirped.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, uh. How was she?”</p><p class="p1">“Great, but she was pretty busy training a new crop of Kyoshi Warriors, so we didn’t get much time to hang out. She’ll be here for the anniversary, anyways.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka nodded.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, she said she misses you,” Aang added, mouth full of rice and sweetpeppers.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I uh… I miss her, too.” Sokka’s eyes stayed focused on his food.</p><p class="p1">Katara spotted a twitch cross Zuko’s face, a subtle look, almost… pained? <em>Sokka looks upset — I guess he just misses her. It’s been awhile. </em>They kept eating, plowing through the delicious food and on to dessert, a selection of ripe summer fruits sliced and presented on a platter.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, these moon-peaches…” Katara mumbled, mouth sticky and sweet.</p><p class="p1">“Here, try them with this,” Zuko said, offering her a slim bottle. “It’s a citrusfruit wine. Goes great with the moon-peaches.”</p><p class="p1">She poured herself a small glass and took a sip, the tartness mixing with the sweet juice in her mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, you’re right! Wow, that’s great.” Zuko smiled at that, pouring three more glasses.</p><p class="p1">As the sun set, the four of them stuffed themselves on fruit, washing it down with wine until they were happy and relaxed and laughing, Aang telling old airbender folktales they’d never heard before. Katara loved watching him, how he lit up when he got to share his favorite stories. He’d told her before, quietly at night, how much it meant to him to know that if his friends knew those stories too, then he wouldn’t have to worry so much about accidentally forgetting them. So, she always listened carefully.</p><p class="p1">The sunset dimmed into dusk, and Katara felt the wine in her joints. She hadn’t had quite enough to make her tipsy, but just enough to make her a bit sleepy… she laid back, head resting comfortably on Aang’s chest, watching her brother try to communicate wordlessly to Zuko, frustrated. They were losing the game of charades.</p><p class="p1">“Uh, an animal. It’s an animal, right?” Zuko guessed, and Sokka nodded, flapping his arms like wings.</p><p class="p1">“Turtleduck. No? Turtleducks don’t fly.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka groaned, motioning more animatedly.</p><p class="p1">“Arctic hen.”</p><p class="p1">Her brother mimed writing, then rolling up a scroll.</p><p class="p1">“Okay, now I have no idea what you’re doing.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka smacked his forehead.</p><p class="p1">“Ten seconds,” Aang said, checking the little hourglass they were using as a timer.</p><p class="p1">“Goose-heron! Uh, uh, a sparrowkeet! Fuck.” Zuko’s words were a bit fuzzy, and he dropped his head into his hands. “Damn it.” He looked up again. “Oh! Sea raven!”</p><p class="p1">“Time’s up!” Aang called.</p><p class="p1">Sokka sighed. “It was a messenger hawk.”</p><p class="p1">“Ohh…” Zuko said, flopping back across the lounge chair. “I get it now. The writing…”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, dummy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka sat on the same lounge, next to Zuko’s head, peering down at his partner.</p><p class="p1">“Who are you calling a dummy?” Zuko said, a broad smile on his face.</p><p class="p1">“You. Dummy.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re the dummy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s eyebrows arched, and he leaned a little closer to tease Zuko. “You’re the one who couldn’t guess <em>messenger hawk</em> even though you use them every day.”</p><p class="p1">“Watch it, <em>Ambassador.</em>” There was more snark, more mischief, in Zuko’s voice than Katara remembered him ever using with Sokka… she’d never seen him act like this around anyone, really.</p><p class="p1">Sokka just grinned, hand brushing Zuko’s shoulder, then fluttering away again. <em>Huh, that’s —</em></p><p class="p1">Katara was jostled slightly as Aang got up.</p><p class="p1">“Alright, time for the dream team to show you how it’s done,” Aang said, and Katara turned her attention to focus on her fiancé. <em>The dream team. He’s cute when he’s competitive.</em></p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Skin connected with skin, like always, and then Sokka ducked out of the way of Zuko’s strike. <em>Close, but not close enough.</em> He liked that the rhythm of Zuko’s movements was familiar, like a practiced dance. It was just a nice bonus that at the end of this dance, one of them was always pinned to the ground.</p><p class="p1">Sokka stopped Zuko’s forearm with a hand, and stepped in, planting a quick kiss on him, then twisting away, unable to hide his glee at Zuko’s indignant expression.</p><p class="p1">“Got you,” Sokka singsonged, striking at Zuko’s side with a fist, landing a quick tap while he was distracted.</p><p class="p1">“That’s not fair,” Zuko complained, retreating to put some distance between the two of them.</p><p class="p1">“Aw, did that catch you off-guard? Woops.”</p><p class="p1">A predatory smile grew on Zuko’s face, and Sokka’s stomach fluttered in response, but he resolved to focus on Zuko’s strikes and blocks.</p><p class="p1">Zuko dipped around, suddenly behind Sokka’s back, and Sokka felt sure hands grab his hips, body pressed in close, his mouth at Sokka’s neck for a fleeting movement before he was gone again — and then Sokka was pushed forward, stumbling.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko,” Sokka exclaimed.</p><p class="p1">“What, you can dish it out but you can’t take it?” Zuko teased.</p><p class="p1">“No, shut up.”</p><p class="p1">“Hmm…” Zuko had his fists up again, a ready stance, when he said those magic words, “make me.”</p><p class="p1"><em>Oh, so it’s like that then? </em>“Be careful what you wish for, Zuzu.” Sokka moved in to grab Zuko’s body and wrestle him to the ground, but Zuko slipped away before Sokka could even touch him.</p><p class="p1">“I told you not to call me that.” Zuko was breathing hard, striking at Sokka’s abdomen.</p><p class="p1">“Make me!” Sokka retorted, and managed to brush his lips across Zuko’s shoulder, before Zuko had twisted away again.</p><p class="p1">“It’s disrespectful —” Zuko panted, moving quickly, “— to your Fire Lord —” Sokka landed a tap, but Zuko took advantage of Sokka’s proximity and grabbed hold of his forearm, twisting it behind Sokka’s back, wrapping his other arm around Sokka’s chest to hold him flush to his skin.</p><p class="p1">“—to use silly nicknames like that,” Zuko finished, and dragged his mouth across the sweaty skin at the nape of Sokka’s neck.</p><p class="p1">Sokka tried to catch his breath, a struggle with the feeling of Zuko’s tongue running along the crest of his shoulder. He shifted, his trapped arm pressed between his back and Zuko’s heated chest, reaching back with his free arm to do <em>something</em> to wriggle free. It was hard to concentrate on exactly what.</p><p class="p1">“You’re <em>my</em> Fire Lord, then?” Sokka said, swallowing, struggling weakly at the hold. Did he want Zuko to let him go? Not really. “Mine.”</p><p class="p1">“You know I’m yours,” Zuko said, barely discernible against Sokka’s back.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hand finally found Zuko’s hip, fumbling for purchase. Zuko pressed closer, hips tilting up, his grip on Sokka’s wrist weakening — Sokka took that opening, whipping around to wrestle Zuko to the ground, his chest pressed into the flagstones, Zuko with his arm trapped behind his back this time. Zuko grunted, twisting and struggling.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, fuck you.”</p><p class="p1">“Pretty please?” Sokka breathed, right into his ear — he knew Zuko went wild for that, and he got exactly what he wanted, a garbled groan and a twist of Zuko’s hips, legs kicking back. Sokka relished taking his turn mouthing at Zuko’s skin, searing hot and a little sweaty, Zuko’s torso heaving as he breathed. He was just getting little panting moans out of Zuko when suddenly, he was flat on his back and Zuko had his legs on either side of him, leaning down and grinning.</p><p class="p1">“Maybe I <em>will</em> fuck you,” he said, and then finally, <em>finally</em> Zuko’s mouth was on his — <em>about time</em> — that lovely hot tongue and his teeth dragging at Sokka’s bottom lip, hips pressing insistently into his. Sokka could feel the grit of a little dirt from where Zuko’s chest had been pressed to the ground. <em>I’ll have to bathe after this, but fuck it,</em> he thought, in between frantic grabbing at Zuko’s hair, back, ass, anything he could get a hold on —</p><p class="p1">“Oh my god!”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s stomach felt yanked out from inside him. <em>Aang. </em>His head snapped to the direction of the voice to see him, standing at the entrance to the secluded little courtyard, hand covering an open-mouthed grin.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck,” Zuko choked out, scrambling back as fast as he could, and Sokka leapt to his feet, heart racing.</p><p class="p1">“Oh my <em>god</em>,” Aang repeated, doubling over, laughing. “You — you’re — I can’t believe this.”</p><p class="p1">“Aang, Aang please quiet down,” Sokka said frantically, running up to his friend.</p><p class="p1">“This is — I did not expect that,” Aang said, breathless, dissolving into another fit of laughter.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Aang!</em>”</p><p class="p1">“Okay, okay, calm down, I’m just surprised. Jeez.” Aang stood up, straightening his robes. “Whew. Okay. So, you two are —” He gestured between Sokka and Zuko, who was still laid on the ground covering his face. “— uh, involved?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka felt his cheeks burn. “Yes.”</p><p class="p1">Aang snorted, but managed to keep himself composed. “So is it like… buddies with benefits, or…”</p><p class="p1">“We’re — fuck.” He turned around, looking to Zuko. <em>My boyfriend.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko was shaking his head. “No, no, no. This is a disaster.”</p><p class="p1">“What? Nothing wrong with a little friendly fooling around,” Aang said, shrugging, a smug smile on his face.</p><p class="p1">Sokka caught Zuko’s eyes, and they were wide and terrified, waiting for him to say it, so Sokka did.</p><p class="p1">“We’re… we’ve been dating.”</p><p class="p1">That shut Aang up, finally, for a blissful moment, and Sokka just kept looking at Zuko. It hung in the air, and then Zuko sat up with a shaky breath, brushing the dirt off his skin.</p><p class="p1">“Ah,” Aang said carefully, breaking the silence. “So, uhm… how long?”</p><p class="p1">“I dunno — when did we —?”</p><p class="p1">“The beginning of the summer. So, a couple months,” Zuko filled in quietly, coming up to stand just behind Sokka.</p><p class="p1">“You haven’t told us for <em>months? </em>Why didn’t you say anything? Did you tell Katara and not me?” he accused, hand to his chest.</p><p class="p1">“No, no one knows. Well,” Sokka said, amending his statement, “maybe some guards. But Katara doesn’t know. None of the gang knows. We haven’t told anyone — yet.”</p><p class="p1">“Man, Toph is gonna have a <em>field day</em> with this,” Aang chuckled, running a hand across his shaved head. “Zuko, you might wanna brace for impact when Katara finds out —”</p><p class="p1">“Aang, you can’t tell anyone,” Sokka interrupted. “Please.”</p><p class="p1">“Come on, why not?” he whined. “This gossip is so juicy.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko groaned, “I’m dead,” and clutched his temples.</p><p class="p1">“Look, no one else knows yet, and I thought you guys weren’t gonna be here for a while, and I was waiting for the anniversary, because, like, Zuko and I just <em>happened</em> and I didn’t mean for it to happen but then it did, and —”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Aang prodded.</p><p class="p1">“— and, I wanna tell Suki myself.”</p><p class="p1">Aang’s smile dropped, face serious all of a sudden. Sokka could sense Zuko tensing up, next to him.</p><p class="p1">“Okay. I understand,” Aang said, nodding. “I’ll keep my mouth shut until the anniversary. What… what are you gonna tell her?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko strode away from them, shoulders tight.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko —” Aang started, turning to follow him, but Sokka stopped him with a hand on Aang’s arm.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t. It’s… just let me sort this all out. It’s my mess to clean up.”</p><p class="p1">“Alright.” Aang sighed, hands on his hips. “Good luck. You made a pretty big mess this time.”</p><p class="p1">“I know,” Sokka groaned, stomach sinking with guilt. “I think I might have fucked it all up.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you wanna talk about it?” Aang offered gently.</p><p class="p1">“Not right now. Maybe… maybe later. Just — promise me you <em>won’t</em> tell Katara. <em>Anything</em>.”</p><p class="p1">“Airbender’s honor,” Aang swore, hand on his heart.</p><p class="p1">“Is that even a thing?” Sokka asked, skeptical.</p><p class="p1">“It’s totally a thing!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Fire Nation Candles</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Fire Nation summer holidays are here, so it's time for the Gaang to get back together.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Added a little angst, for ~spice~</p><p>TW: Homophobic language from some asshole Fire Nation citizens.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Zuko had left the commotion for a few minutes; he just needed a breather. He'd fled to the upstairs balcony of the town hall, figuring that if he was going to hide he could at least keep a bird’s eye view on things.</p><p class="p1">The square was raucous, filled with vendors hawking treats and crafts, the theatre festooned with banners advertising the big show. There was a new play, a tale of misadventure and love, scheduled for the last night of the festival. Ember Island was alive with activity, packed to the brim with locals and tourists celebrating the Summer Tides Festival. It was the beginning of a grueling few weeks of touring for Zuko; though the sweet treats and bright colors were delightful, after a few weeks of back-to-back socializing the holidays were exhausting.</p><p class="p1">From his spot leaning on the balcony railing, he could still spot Aang and Katara, joining in for a dance, feet light across the cobblestones. They were grinning, laughing, bright-eyed… Zuko envied them. Their lives seemed simple, from where he was perched: he was hers, and she was his. Zuko knew, in an abstract way, that they must have their own problems — everyone does — but he couldn’t help moping sometimes.</p><p class="p1">He tried to find Sokka in the crowd, not spotting him among the people Aang and Katara danced with. <em>Where’d he go? </em>Zuko squinted at the food stalls. <em>Not there. </em>The craft stores? <em>Not there, either.</em> Zuko sighed, leaning against the wall of the building behind him and slumping to the ground, crossing his legs. <em>When did I fall this hard? I can’t even have fun without him. </em></p><p class="p1">Zuko heard a knock at the doorframe, then Sokka peered out.</p><p class="p1">“Hey. Can I join you?” he asked, leaning above Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">“Cool.” Sokka sat down next to him, bumping him lightly with his shoulder. “All partied out, huh?”</p><p class="p1">“…Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">They sat quietly, the air hanging dead between them, and then Zuko leaned against Sokka’s shoulder, and they both let out a breath they didn’t know they’d been holding. Sokka’s body relaxed into it, settling an arm around Zuko’s back, pressing his palm to Zuko’s hip.</p><p class="p1">“I miss you,” Sokka offered, cheek resting against Zuko’s head.</p><p class="p1">Zuko stayed silent, afraid that if he opened his mouth, he’d start crying out of nowhere, like a child. He cleared his throat, ignoring that prickling feeling in his nose and eyes that warned of oncoming tears.</p><p class="p1">“I miss you, too.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko didn’t want to think about the last week. Aang discovering them had woken Zuko up to the inevitable: everyone would find out eventually, or he had to stop being with — that was a horrible thought, and Zuko couldn’t let himself think it. Everyone would find out, <em>Suki</em> would have to find out, and the guilt gnawed at Zuko’s stomach, like a parasite from bad meat. What with the guilt, the desperation to keep Katara from finding out, and the veneer he had to keep up during his public appearances at these festivals, Zuko had been putting a lot of distance between himself and Sokka. <em>It’s just the way it has to be right now, </em>he’d told himself, <em>with everything going on, with Katara in the room next to Sokka’s… </em>Zuko hadn’t spent this long without Sokka’s affection in months.</p><p class="p1">“You’ve been…” Sokka trailed off, hesitant. “…quiet.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko nodded.</p><p class="p1">“I know you might not want to, but, can we talk about it? I need — this sucks.”</p><p class="p1">That damned prickling feeling again. “If I talk about it I’m gonna cry,” Zuko mumbled. “In front of all these people.” He gestured at the balcony railing.</p><p class="p1">“Do you wanna leave? You don’t look like you’re having very much fun.”</p><p class="p1">“No, I have to stay. I’m the Fire Lord, it’s my job.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, it’s late. No one will blame you for just going to bed.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko paused. “A little longer.”</p><p class="p1">“Alright.” They stood, and Sokka brushed off his clothes. “We’ll go say goodbye?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko didn’t respond; he just took a deep breath and hurried back downstairs, Sokka following behind him. He knew he was being cold, but it was the only way he could keep it together.</p><p class="p1">When they stepped out into the square, the noise of the festival enveloped them, jarring after the quiet balcony. Sokka’s fingers brushed Zuko’s, to keep his hand close in the crowd, but Zuko’s hand twitched away, and Sokka didn’t press it. They jostled through the crowd, festival goers stepping awkwardly to the side after realizing their shoulder had bumped the Fire Lord. After some uncomfortable maneuvering, they found Aang and Katara, breathless from their dancing.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka! There you are,” Katara laughed. “I can get those fire flakes now. Aang’s finally giving it a rest,” she said, pulling her hair back into a quick bun, away from her neck.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, we were just about to leave, actually —”</p><p class="p1">“Come on, you’ve been pestering me to try them all night. Let’s just grab them real quick,” she said, grabbing her brother’s arm and tugging him away. Sokka glanced back at Zuko apologetically for a fleeting moment before they’d vanished.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t look at me like that,” Zuko grumbled to Aang.</p><p class="p1">“Like what?”</p><p class="p1">“Come on, you know what I mean.” <em>Like you’re sorry for me.</em></p><p class="p1">“You just seem — a little tired today. Are you okay?”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, I’m fine,” Zuko snapped.</p><p class="p1">Aang gave him a pointed look, and Zuko sighed, pulling Aang off to the side, in a niche between a stall selling pearl trinkets and a stall selling steamed shrimp-mussels.</p><p class="p1">“It’s just been so awkward, and it’s never been like this before, and I don’t know what to do. Every time I look at him, I just feel so — so guilty.”</p><p class="p1">“Guilty.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, about Suki. I took him from her.” Zuko’s throat felt tight.</p><p class="p1">Aang paused, rubbing at the stubble on his chin.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, do you <em>own</em> Sokka?”</p><p class="p1">“What? No, that’s not what I meant.”</p><p class="p1">“Does Suki own Sokka?”</p><p class="p1">“…No.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka’s his own person, Zuko. You didn’t <em>take</em> him. You shouldn’t feel guilty for the decisions that Sokka’s made. Okay?”</p><p class="p1">“Okay. I still feel guilty, though.”</p><p class="p1">Aang sighed. “Just know you don’t need to.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka and Katara returned, Katara happily popping fire flakes into her mouth.</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know how you can eat those so easily,” Sokka grumbled.</p><p class="p1">“What are you talking about? They’re not that spicy.”</p><p class="p1">“They are to me!”</p><p class="p1">“Then you’re just a wimp.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka groaned, and caught Zuko’s eyes, then glanced at Aang. <em>He knows we were talking about it.</em></p><p class="p1">“I’m exhausted. Zuko, let’s get out of here.”</p><p class="p1">“O-okay, uh, goodnight guys —” Zuko was cut off when Sokka grabbed his wrist and guided him through the crowd, towards the path back to the beach house. “Jeez Sokka, rude much?”</p><p class="p1">“Sorry.” Sokka didn’t sound sorry.</p><p class="p1">He moved like a man on a mission until he had Zuko plopped down on the broad featherbed in front of him, both men seated cross-legged, lanterns dim.</p><p class="p1">“Okay. Let’s do the talking thing,” Sokka said. “I’ll go first. Aang told me to use <em>I feel </em>statements.” He took a breath. “I feel — um, I feel like we haven’t talked. In a while.”</p><p class="p1">“We talk.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure, in front of Aang and Katara, but not alone. <em>I feel</em> like you don’t want to — I don’t know. This feels weird.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka waited, watching Zuko’s face nervously. <em>Fuck, I’m gonna cry. I’m gonna cry if he keeps looking at me like that.</em> Zuko trained his eyes on his hands, folded in his lap.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pressed on, “<em>I feel </em>like, I told you I love you, and then you just shut me out. As if — as if you don’t believe me, or this isn’t enough, or you don’t want to be together anymore —”</p><p class="p1">“No!” It came out choked, and then the tears started burning down Zuko’s cheeks. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I <em>want </em>to be with you. I’m so sorry I’ve been like this.” He waved a hand airily, trying to feign composure, failing to keep his voice from cracking.</p><p class="p1">“Ah, fuck. Don’t cry, don’t cry.” Sokka leaned forward, grabbing at Zuko’s hands. “I didn’t wanna make you cry. I’ve fucked it up, haven’t I?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko choked out a laugh. “No, I’m just a mess. It’s not your fault.”</p><p class="p1">“<em>I feel</em> like it is.”</p><p class="p1">“Please stop with the <em>I feel </em>stuff.”</p><p class="p1">“No. It was good advice. You try it.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay.” Zuko swallowed. “Um, <em>I feel…</em> bad.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka nodded slowly. “Alright. Good start, good start.”</p><p class="p1">“Shut up. I feel, like, gross. On the inside.” Sokka stayed silent, letting Zuko get on a roll. “I feel really guilty, about having to be a secret. You deserve to have someone who’ll hold your hand.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re holding my hands right now.” Sokka squeezed his fingers, threaded between Zuko’s.</p><p class="p1">“In public. At festivals. You deserve someone who’ll kiss you all the time. And, and, I got between you and Suki. I feel so guilty.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka let out a deep breath.</p><p class="p1">“Okay. So, first of all, it doesn’t really matter what <em>you </em>think I deserve, does it? It matters what <em>I</em> want. And I want you. I’ve fallen in love with you. My turtleduck.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko blushed at the nickname, the way Sokka said it so softly, how Sokka’s hands squeezed tight when he said it, and he couldn’t help more tears leaking out.</p><p class="p1">“Shut up,” Zuko said quietly, staring at their hands.</p><p class="p1">“No, I will not. I will not be silenced.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re making me cry more,” Zuko sniffled, and then Sokka pitched forward and tackled him back onto the bed. “Sokka!”</p><p class="p1">“I love you,” Sokka said, pressing kisses to Zuko’s hair, his wet cheek, his jaw. “I love you, I love you, I love you. Do you believe me now?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko wriggled under the attention. “I always <em>believed </em>you, Sokka, that’s not what this is about.” Sokka picked his head up, and Zuko noticed his eyes were shining and his cheeks were wet. “You’re crying, too.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m a sympathetic crier.” Sokka smiled.</p><p class="p1">Zuko brushed away the tears at Sokka’s eyes, holding his face.</p><p class="p1">“I love you, too. I’m sorry I’ve been so distant. It’s just been a lot… but I miss you.”</p><p class="p1">“Stop apologizing. I’m right here, I’ll always be here.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko couldn’t help kissing him, with Sokka hovering over him, cheeks pink from crying and telling him such sweet things and looking at him with such care. He didn’t know quite what to say to make Sokka understand, <em>really</em> understand what he meant to Zuko, so Zuko just kissed him and hoped Sokka would get the message.</p><p class="p1">The kiss was salty with tears at first, but after a few moments of Zuko kissing Sokka like he was dying, the salt was washed away, and then Zuko got his hands in Sokka’s hair and clutched him close, a lifeline. He could feel Sokka’s breath puff out, warm through the kiss, and Zuko wanted to catch it all, hold him so tight he couldn’t leave — Sokka’s body sank down, leaning on his elbows, and Zuko’s whole world narrowed to just Sokka’s mouth and breath, arms bracketed around Zuko’s shoulders like a cocoon.</p><p class="p1">“I love you,” came out of Zuko, a sigh, slipping out as easy as breathing.</p><p class="p1">Sokka hummed, and Zuko felt it vibrate in Sokka’s chest. Zuko’s skin was warm, tingling, his chest fluttering more with each movement of Sokka’s lips on his. Zuko said it again, and Sokka just kept kissing him, holding his face, thumbs brushing over Zuko’s cheekbones.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s tongue slipped across Sokka’s bottom lip, and Sokka sighed, so Zuko pressed the kiss deeper, wrapping his arms tighter around Sokka’s shoulders. It felt so good, Sokka kissing him, he couldn’t help it, he wanted to keep kissing him forever, so that everything else could stay far away and never bother him again.</p><p class="p1">Before Zuko knew it, Sokka’s tongue was in his mouth, and Zuko was nipping at Sokka’s lip, and Sokka’s hands were in his hair, and Zuko’s hips were tilting up. The kiss slid from tender to rough so fast — it took Zuko’s breath away, and his body was screaming <em>yes </em>— his hands moving to grip Sokka’s hips and Sokka’s mouth on his neck felt just like before, before all the hurt about —</p><p class="p1">It came rushing back, that sick feeling in Zuko’s stomach.</p><p class="p1">“I can’t, I can’t,” Zuko gasped, and Sokka stilled, looking down at him with a furrowed brow, breathing heavily.</p><p class="p1">“I — I’m sorry —”</p><p class="p1">“It’s okay, I know I was — I want to, but I can’t. At least, not tonight.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay.” Sokka pulled away, sitting up, swallowing thickly. “Do you want me to go?”</p><p class="p1">“No, don’t go.” Zuko leaned up. “Could we just cuddle? I don’t want to sleep alone again.”</p><p class="p1">“Of course.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka had to leave to get his sleepclothes, and Zuko changed quietly, limbs aching, eyes sore. Alone for a moment, the exhaustion rushed into him, and he burrowed under the covers, ready to sleep for a million years if he could.</p><p class="p1">He heard voices out in the hall, hushed tones — Sokka, Aang’s deep voice, murmuring. Then Sokka was blowing out the lanterns and slipping into bed.</p><p class="p1">“Aang and Katara came back?” Zuko whispered.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Aang wanted to know if you were okay,” Sokka responded with a kiss to Zuko’s forehead.</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Zuko played sleepily with Sokka’s hair. “I’ve gotten used to going to sleep with you,” he confessed. “This week, I couldn’t sleep. It sucked.”</p><p class="p1">“Me too. I missed you. I missed my little hotpot.”</p><p class="p1">“I missed you, too.”</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Before Sokka was ready — like he ever would have been ready — his stomach was twisting in knots watching Suki’s boat pull into the Caldera City harbor, and she threw her arms around him, beaming like the sun.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka! You’re here!”</p><p class="p1"><em>Her hair smells like pine needles, like always. </em>“Of course I’m here, the anniversary is tomorrow.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, it’s just so good to see you.” She pulled back, hands on his shoulders, eyes crinkling around the edges as she smiled. “How have you been? It’s been so long.”</p><p class="p1">“Uhm, good!” <em>I’m gonna throw up.</em> “Just, doing ambassador stuff. Working on — diplomacy.”</p><p class="p1">“You’ll have to tell me all about it. Tomorrow’s going to be so much fun! I love when we all get back together,” she chirped, loading up a cart with her things from the boat. “It’s one of my favorite parts of the year.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah…” Sokka agreed weakly, and then Ty Lee leapt down, giving Sokka a quick hug.</p><p class="p1">“Hi, Sokka!” The two women were both in full Kyoshi Warrior garb, face paint immaculate. “Sorry we’re late, we had a bit of a rough ride.”</p><p class="p1">“What?” Sokka turned to Suki. “What happened?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, just a little summer storm. Don’t worry about it.” She waved her hand dismissively. “Are we the last ones to get here?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, Aang and Katara have been here for a couple weeks, and Toph just got in two days ago.” Sokka fiddled with the hem of his tunic.</p><p class="p1">“What about Mai?” Ty Lee asked, arms full of supplies.</p><p class="p1">“Mai? She’s not here.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh.” Ty Lee looked disappointed. “She said she was going to come this year…”</p><p class="p1">“You’ve talked to Mai?”</p><p class="p1">“Of course I’ve talked to Mai, silly,” she said, depositing her armful on the cart. “We write each other all the time, and she even visited Kyoshi for a while. She told me she felt ready —” her mouth quirked to the side, “— but, I guess not.” Ty Lee brightened. “Still, I’m excited for tomorrow!”</p><p class="p1">The cart was full, so the three of them climbed on and rumbled toward the palace.</p><p class="p1">“Five years,” Suki mused. “Can you believe it’s already been five years?”</p><p class="p1">“Not really,” Sokka said. <em>At least that much is true.</em></p><p class="p1">“Big anniversary. Does Zuko have anything special planned?”</p><p class="p1">“Uhmm…” Suki mentioning Zuko made Sokka’s brain short-circuit. “I think so — a big parade. Uh, some cultural performances. He’s been pretty busy.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh I can’t wait,” Ty Lee squealed. Suki looked at her fondly.</p><p class="p1">Sokka tried to not hyperventilate.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko took a breath, and stepped out onto the wide stone plaza. <em>Here we go. </em></p><p class="p1">“Greetings, citizens and visitors of Caldera City,” he began, focusing on projecting his voice. The crowd before him was large, and beginning to get boisterous in anticipation of the anniversary celebration. No doubt some had begun celebrating already.</p><p class="p1">“Today marks the fifth year since Sozin’s Comet last came, and the fifth year since our nation has begun to heal. As I look at the faces before me, I can see that we have indeed taken the first steps to mend the fractures in our world. I see people from every nation, coming together to celebrate peace, and harmony.</p><p class="p1">“A broken bone doesn’t always heal perfectly, and never heals quickly. I know there have been bumps in the road, but with your perseverance, your compassion, I know that we’ll arrive there, one day: in a world linked together as one. Thank you.”</p><p class="p1">He bowed deeply, the noise of the crowd billowing up around him. <em>So far, so good. </em>Aang clapped a hand on his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Great speech, Zuko, as always.”</p><p class="p1">“Thanks, Aang. I wrote it myself.”</p><p class="p1">“You don’t have speechwriters for this kind of thing?”</p><p class="p1">“Feels disingenuous.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, it was very poetic,” Katara said.</p><p class="p1">Zuko pretty much had to stay put on the stone dias, paying attention to the performers he’d scheduled and remaining available for anyone who wanted an audience with him. He was seated behind a long carved table, dishes from the feast set out along the length of it, with cushions on either side for his friends. They came and went, Aang and Katara leaping out onto the dance floor and back again, Suki running off to visit the Kyoshi Warriors’ table, Toph getting restless and sneaking off to get into trouble who knows where. Thankfully, Sokka stayed by Zuko’s side.</p><p class="p1">The dancers from the Southern Water Tribe bowed, completing their performance, and Zuko clapped along with the audience. He turned to Sokka — Zuko was surprised to see Sokka already looking at him.</p><p class="p1">“What?” Zuko asked, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Nothing.”</p><p class="p1">“Why were you staring at me?”</p><p class="p1">“You’re cute.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko chided, but couldn’t help his grin. <em>There’s no one around to overhear… </em>“Not as cute as you,” he said quietly.</p><p class="p1">It wasn’t just sweet-talk, Zuko really believed it. Sokka had a new tunic on, and he looked gorgeous in it.</p><p class="p1">Sokka rolled his eyes. “You’re ridiculous.”</p><p class="p1">Toph sidled up to the table and flopped down onto a cushion. “Aw sweet, they came around with more dumplings while I was gone.” She popped one into her mouth. “Sokka, do you know any Southern Water Tribe dances?”</p><p class="p1">“Not really… didn’t have much time for dancing during the war.”</p><p class="p1">“Twinkle toes over here seemed to make it work,” Toph said with her mouth full, pointing a thumb at Aang, who was drifting back with Katara.</p><p class="p1">“What about me?” Aang asked, settling with his head leaning on Katara’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“I was telling Sokka that you found plenty of time for dancing during the war.”</p><p class="p1">“There’s always time for dancing!”</p><p class="p1">“Katara, was your village a no-dancing zone or does Boomerang guy just have two left feet?” Toph quipped.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka can dance,” Katara said, smiling mischievously. “Although he never had many dance partners. Other than Gran-Gran.”</p><p class="p1">“Katara,” Sokka complained.</p><p class="p1">“Ooh, show us your fancy footwork, Sokka,” Toph teased. “You haven’t gotten up all night. Don’t be such a wet blanket.”</p><p class="p1">Suki and Ty Lee approached the table, out of their uniforms for the night, bare-faced.</p><p class="p1">“Why don’t you and Suki have a dance?” Katara suggested innocently. Aang’s eyes caught Zuko’s for a split second before Zuko glanced away, focusing on his food.</p><p class="p1">“Sure. Come on, Sokka,” Suki said, taking Sokka’s hand and pulling him up.</p><p class="p1">“…Okay, okay.”</p><p class="p1">Suki swept him out onto the dance floor, and Zuko just had to sit and watch. The worst part was that they looked great together. Sokka really could dance; Zuko would’ve liked watching Sokka spinning through the dance moves, if it wasn’t for the bitter knowledge that Zuko was coming in the way of something so good. He picked at his food. <em>They’re perfect for each other, </em>he thought. <em>I should just stop moping around and get over it. Maybe it’s better if I just get out of the way, let them be happy. </em>They moved fluidly in time to the music, Suki laughing and Sokka grinning. <em>She makes him so happy.</em></p><p class="p1">Aang scooted over to Zuko’s side, leaving Katara and Toph to their bickering over whether Katara or Sokka was the better dancer.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, buddy.” Aang’s voice was quiet under the music, just for Zuko’s ears.</p><p class="p1">“I’m fine, Aang. Really.”</p><p class="p1">“If you say so.”</p><p class="p1">They sat in silence for a moment, Zuko watching the dance floor, Aang watching Zuko; then, a commotion at the edge of the plaza drew everyone’s attention. Zuko rose, watching closely. A group of Fire Nation citizens had entered all of a sudden, carrying signs and looking angry.</p><p class="p1">“Death to the traitor!” one of them screamed, and then they all joined in, jeering at the guests. They started throwing epithets and swearing, spitting <em>ice-blood </em>and <em>dirt-thrower</em>.</p><p class="p1">Toph jumped up. “I’ll show them a dirt-thrower,” she growled, shifting a bare foot forward from under her dress and raising her hands to strike.</p><p class="p1">“Toph, please,” Zuko said, stretching out a hand.</p><p class="p1">She scoffed. “Are you kidding? You’re really gonna get in my way?”</p><p class="p1">“I know. Just let me handle this, please.”</p><p class="p1">Her lip curled, but she sat back down, arms crossed, muttering angrily and colorfully about exactly how she’d show them where she could throw dirt.</p><p class="p1">Zuko squared his shoulders and strode down from the dias, guards running before him with spears in hand. Aang and Katara followed close behind.</p><p class="p1">“Traitor!” a man said, and spat at Zuko. Zuko flinched, trying not to let his anger show on his face.</p><p class="p1">“If you can’t show the proper respect to our guests,” Zuko called, “You need to leave.”</p><p class="p1">“This is <em>our</em> nation!” another yelled. “<em>Ours! </em>You’re a traitor!”</p><p class="p1">“You need to leave.” Zuko’s voice was curt.</p><p class="p1">The jeers grew louder. “You’re weak! You couldn’t even hold onto your own throne if it wasn’t for the Avatar!” “Traitor!” “You’re a disgrace to the Fire Nation!” “Pervert!”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt his mouth pull up in a snarl. “Get them out of here,” he snapped to the guards.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, get real men to do your dirty work for you!” a man called. “Fire Lord Cocksucker!”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt like fists clench and grow hot at his sides, ready to light aflame, but he did his best to steel his face and let the guards jostle the small group out of the plaza. Once they’d been removed, Zuko turned on his heel to return to the dias.</p><p class="p1">Aang’s face had paled and Katara looked stunned, eyes wide at Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“What was that about?” she asked, looking from Aang to Zuko and back again. “What — Zuko?” He brushed past her, throat tight, jaw clenched. “Zuko?”</p><p class="p1">He focused on steadying his breathing as he ascended the steps to the dias, and then faced his guests with the calmest smile he could muster.</p><p class="p1">“My apologies, everyone, for the disturbance. Let’s not allow their bad attitude to get in the way of our celebration — I’m so looking forward to seeing the Makapu Lion Dancers, and I would hate if we couldn’t enjoy the routine they’ve prepared for us tonight.”</p><p class="p1">The guests looked around at each other uncertainly. Zuko sat, and the murmuring of the crowd gradually started up again.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Damn</em>, sparky,” Toph sighed. “Didn’t know you had that in you.”</p><p class="p1">“That I had what in me?” Zuko turned to see Toph smirking.</p><p class="p1">“Your Fire Lord voice,” she said, deepening her voice comically.</p><p class="p1">Zuko sighed, turning his attention to the performance starting up.</p><p class="p1">“Are you okay?” Sokka whispered at Zuko’s side.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, <em>Sokka</em>, I’m fine. Leave it.” Zuko didn’t mean for the words to come out so bitter, but they did, and Katara was sitting <em>right behind them, </em>so how was he supposed to hold Sokka’s hand like he wanted to?</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked hurt, and Zuko winced. <em>I need to apologize for that later.</em></p><p class="p1">After the performance, the last of the night, Zuko started gulping down the wine, anything to distract him from how poorly he was keeping the whole charade together. <em>I’m pretending I’m doing a good job as Fire Lord, I’m pretending I’m not breaking up two of my closest friends. </em>Before he knew it, the party was ending, and when he tried to stand up his head spun. He stumbled, and a steady hand met his arm.</p><p class="p1">“Woah there,” Sokka said.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s vision righted itself. “Hm, I’m sorry. A little lightheaded,” he said, composing himself.</p><p class="p1">“Let’s keep this party going!” Toph cheered. “Can we get this to go,” Toph said to the attendants, gesturing at the leftover feast. “Afterparty at Zuko’s place.”</p><p class="p1">“We’re already at Zuko’s place,” Katara laughed.</p><p class="p1">“They know what I mean.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko couldn’t find it in him to keep Sokka at a safe distance anymore, with Sokka wrapping an arm around his shoulders, gently guiding him back to the royal apartments, their friends in tow.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">He could almost forget, for a fleeting, glowing moment, that he wasn’t keeping a secret. There was a split second there when he had Zuko’s head resting against the outside of his leg, and Aang was doing a trick for them, and Suki was smiling at him, that it was all just <em>good </em>— but then he’d feel like he was about to throw up again. When he was sure he could taste the feast coming up, he knew he had to say something.</p><p class="p1">Suki had gotten up to refill her cup, so Sokka rose, too, to where she was retrieving more punch from the sideboard. He touched her arm lightly, voice low.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, can I talk to you for a second?” He tried to sound nonchalant.</p><p class="p1">“Sure.”</p><p class="p1">“Um, let’s go out to the balcony. It’s a little loud in here.”</p><p class="p1">They slipped out of the doors into the night, and Sokka refused to look at Zuko before they did, because he knew if he saw Zuko’s face he’d really lose his lunch right over the railing.</p><p class="p1">“What did you want to talk about?”</p><p class="p1">“Just, uh… it’s been awhile.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah,” she said, wistful. “I wish we could spend more time together.”</p><p class="p1">“Me, too.” He didn’t know how to do this, didn’t want to say the wrong thing, but he knew he had to keep going. “So. We, uh, we never talked about being… exclusive.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh,” Suki said, sighing. “I see. <em>That’s</em> what this is about.”</p><p class="p1">“I thought we’d be able to see each other more, but then you were so busy on Kyoshi, and I really wanted to write you. I know that it’s —”</p><p class="p1">“Who told you?” she said, voice resigned.</p><p class="p1">“What?” Sokka blinked.</p><p class="p1">“Who told you? Was it Mai or Katara?”</p><p class="p1">“Told me what?"</p><p class="p1">“Hold on.” Suki held up her hands. “What were you gonna say?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, I uhm —” Sokka swallowed. “Just that, I know that it doesn’t really matter that we didn’t <em>agree</em> on being exclusive, and you’re probably gonna hate me forever, but — I’ve been seeing… someone.”</p><p class="p1">“Someone?” Suki’s brow furrowed in confusion.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, it’s — um — Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">Suki barked a laugh, and Sokka jolted in surprise.</p><p class="p1">“Stars. That is <em>not</em> what I thought you were gonna say.” She leaned against the railing, shaking her head.</p><p class="p1">“What are you talking about? What did you think I was gonna say?”</p><p class="p1">“I thought you’d found out about <em>me!</em>”</p><p class="p1">“You?”</p><p class="p1">“Me and Ty Lee.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka felt his eyes go wide. “You and…? Okay, back up. <em>What?</em>”</p><p class="p1">“I thought you’d found out about me and Ty Lee. We’ve… gotten a lot closer.”</p><p class="p1">“Closer?” Sokka put that word in air quotes.</p><p class="p1">“Things happen when you’re on patrol together! You started talking about not being exclusive, and I thought someone had spilled the beans.”</p><p class="p1">“How long?”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know, it started maybe a year ago — wait, what about you? How long have <em>you</em> been keeping this a secret?”</p><p class="p1">“Like, four months — you’re dating Ty Lee now?”</p><p class="p1">“No, we’re not <em>dating</em>. We’re friends.”</p><p class="p1">“But fooling around?”</p><p class="p1">“…I <em>guess</em> you could call it that — but let’s talk about how you and Zuko are, too?”</p><p class="p1">“Well, we’re in a relationship. I guess.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh.” Suki went quiet. “Okay.” The stood side-by-side in silence, trees rustling around them. The night breeze felt a lot colder then.</p><p class="p1">“I suppose I can’t really be mad at you,” she said, “given that I’ve been with other people, too.” She laughed wryly. “Still sucks, though.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sorry,” Sokka whispered. “I didn’t plan on it, it just —”</p><p class="p1">“It just happened? That’s usually how it goes.” Suki’s voice was bitter, and she pressed her fingers into the balcony railing. “I’m — I’m not mad. I’m just a little upset.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka laid a hand gingerly across hers. “I never wanted to hurt you.” She didn’t push his hand away, so he kept it there. “I wanted to tell you sooner, but I wanted to tell you in person. No one else knows — well, Aang, he found out on accident — because I wanted to tell you, first.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.” She hadn’t been sniffling, but Sokka caught her bring a finger up to brush at the corner of her eye. “I just… I guess I thought we had more time to figure this out. I’m not blaming you for anything, but I’m still hurt.”</p><p class="p1">“It kills me, Suki. I hate seeing you hurt.”</p><p class="p1">“Honestly, I guess I thought we’d kind of just… fall into a way to make this work, long-term, but — that was silly, evidently.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m so sorry.” It was the only thing Sokka could think of to keep saying.</p><p class="p1">“Look, Sokka, I’m always gonna care about you, but I think right now I’m gonna need some space. For a while. It’s too much.”</p><p class="p1">“Of course.”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t want to throw it all away, you mean too much to me to do that, but…” She trailed off, sighing.</p><p class="p1">“I get it. Totally understandable.”</p><p class="p1">They stood in silence again.</p><p class="p1">“So, are you gonna tell everyone else?” Suki asked.</p><p class="p1">“I mean… I guess. Now that I’ve told you.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko’s alright with that?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, we’re still not — there’s not gonna be a like, formal royal announcement or anything, but we think the gang should know. At least.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay, then,” she said. “This should be good.”</p><p class="p1">They stepped back into the receiving room and Suki cleared her throat.</p><p class="p1">“Ahem! Everyone,” they turned to her, “I think Sokka has to fill you all in on something.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka caught Zuko’s eyes, and his eyebrows quirked in a question, eyes flicking to Suki, and Sokka nodded, so Zuko nodded, <em>go ahead. </em></p><p class="p1">“So basically, what it is, is that, Suki and I aren’t actually, uhm, seeing each other anymore, and we haven’t uhm — so the main point is that —”</p><p class="p1">“Spit it out, snoozles.”</p><p class="p1">“— Zuko and I are dating.”</p><p class="p1">Katara’s jaw dropped and Toph rolled to the floor, cackling.</p><p class="p1">“You and Zuzu, dating, I can’t believe —” Toph let out more peals of laughter.</p><p class="p1">“Whaaaaat?” Aang said, faking surprise — extremely poorly, in Sokka’s opinion.</p><p class="p1">Katara whipped around to Aang. “Did you know about this?”</p><p class="p1">“No, I’m just finding out now! I’m just as surprised as you!”</p><p class="p1">“Aang.”</p><p class="p1">“He’s lying, Katara,” Toph smirked.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Aang!</em>”</p><p class="p1">“Hey, I promised Sokka I wouldn’t tell.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, why didn’t you tell me?” Katara demanded, looking around. “Did everyone know but me?”</p><p class="p1">“Not me,” Toph said, raising a hand. “I think everyone else did, though.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka just told me now,” Suki offered.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, what’s the point in being your sister if you won’t tell me anything?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka sighed. “I’m sorry, I just wanted to tell Suki first —”</p><p class="p1">“Aang knew!”</p><p class="p1">“He found out by accident!”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Accident?</em>” Toph seized on the word. “What, did he walk in on you guys?”</p><p class="p1">“No!” Zuko retorted. “He didn’t <em>walk in</em> on us.”</p><p class="p1">“Liar! He totally caught you guys bumping uglies.”</p><p class="p1">“Toph, gross, he’s my brother!” Katara made a retching sound for emphasis.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, let’s not,” Suki said dryly, and Sokka grimaced.</p><p class="p1">“Can we move on, please?” Zuko complained, covering his face with the long sleeves of his robe.</p><p class="p1">“Oh no, I’m not gonna let that happen,” Toph said, leaning back with her hands behind her head, smug.</p><p class="p1">Sokka interjected, “For the record, I would also like to move on, I just thought I should notify you guys —”</p><p class="p1">“How long have you known?” Katara asked, crossing her arms at Aang.</p><p class="p1">“It was only like a week or so! I was just trying to keep my promise to your brother.”</p><p class="p1">“How long has this been going on?” Katara twisted to the Fire Lord, who was still hiding his face. “Zuko?”</p><p class="p1">“Four months,” Zuko groaned.</p><p class="p1">“Four — <em>four months?</em> And you didn’t tell me, Sokka?!”</p><p class="p1">“That explains what Sokka has been doing here this whole time. Or rather, who.” Toph teased.</p><p class="p1">“Alright, I’m going to go to bed,” Suki said, clapping her hands together. “It’s late, and I’m tired.”</p><p class="p1">She breezed out of the room and Katara gave Sokka a curious look, so he sighed, “It went about as well as it could’ve.”</p><p class="p1">“So, which one of you is the cart and which one is the driver?” Toph asked, grinning like a wolfbat.</p><p class="p1">Katara shrieked, and Zuko just hid his face further, and all Sokka wanted to do was sink into the ground and never show his face again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I couldn't resist including a little TySuki. Please leave a comment if you liked it, and if you have any suggestions or ideas I'd love to hear them!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. When Zuko Met Suki</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka and Suki start repairing their friendship, and Suki defends Zuko from an old threat.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka rounded the corner out of the library, headlong into Suki, sending the books and scrolls in his arms tumbling to the floor.</p><p class="p1">“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry, my bad, I didn’t know —” Sokka stammered, falling to his knees to pick up the materials strewn around them.</p><p class="p1">Suki placed her hands on her hips. “It’s fine, Sokka, it was an accident.” She knelt as well, picking up some scrolls. “I’m not gonna bite your head off for it.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka clutched his papers to his chest, looking at her sheepishly. “I know. Sorry.”</p><p class="p1">Suki handed him the scrolls, bound in seals and ribbon.</p><p class="p1">“What’s all this for?” she asked, gesturing at his full arms.</p><p class="p1">“It’s for the restoration efforts. The Fire Nation has a lot of diagrams of the layout of the Southern Water Tribe from decades ago, especially the military defenses.” They both rose, and Sokka cleared his throat awkwardly. “So…”</p><p class="p1">Suki rolled her eyes. “Can we just move on, please? You’ve been acting so weird the past couple weeks.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, I was just — you said you wanted space, so I thought —”</p><p class="p1">“I said I wanted space, not for you to run away every time I enter the room.” She sighed. “Thank you for giving me space. I did need it. But, I think I’m ready to try to be friends again. At least to start.” Suki looked at him hesitantly. “Do you want to? Be friends?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka heaved a sigh of relief. “Oh man, of course I do. Sorry I’ve been acting weird — I’ve never been in… this situation before.”</p><p class="p1">“…Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">After the incident at the comet’s anniversary, Suki and the Kyoshi Warriors had decided to stay in Caldera City, picking up their roles as the Fire Lord’s security once again. Suki had put on her steely commander face and insisted that it was her professional obligation — when Sokka tried to suggest that she could leave a deputy in command if staying was… too much, she’d fixed him with a piercing glare that he’d never seen before.</p><p class="p1">Sokka took a breath and continued, “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, with you having to stay here —”</p><p class="p1">“A bit late for that, isn’t it?” she said sarcastically, then relaxed. “I appreciate it, though. You caring.”</p><p class="p1">“I care a lot. About that.” Sokka shifted his books in his arms. “So, what now?”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know.” She paused. “We could have lunch, or something.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure. I’ll probably be in the library all day tomorrow, so you could just come grab me? When you go on break.”</p><p class="p1">“Sounds good.” There was a small smile on her face, and then she moved on down the corridor.</p><p class="p1">The next day, Sokka was so deep in concentration poring over the aging maps and recon reports that he jumped when Suki tapped his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Whatcha reading?” she asked, leaning against the table.</p><p class="p1">“Some of the stuff I told you about yesterday. Did you know we used to have <em>two</em> ports?” He pointed to the city planning document.</p><p class="p1">“No, I didn’t.”</p><p class="p1">“We did! And it was apparently a great idea, because it spread the Fire Nation attack forces thinner, made it harder to blockade us. I’m gonna add it to my plans.” Sokka stood, rubbing his hands together. “Let’s go get some grub. All this researching really worked up my appetite.”</p><p class="p1">The cook scoffed at them when they came in, Sokka begging for a couple bowls of his favorite noodles, but after a few well-crafted compliments Chef Gen had two steaming bowls in front of them.</p><p class="p1">Sokka slid onto the wooden bench, slurping up the rich broth.</p><p class="p1">“These are really good,” Suki mumbled through a mouthful of noodles.</p><p class="p1">“Many thanks, Commander. It’s all in the bone broth,” Chef Gen called over his shoulder, busy with preparations for dinner later that night.</p><p class="p1">“I told you. Magical.” Sokka took another gulp. “So, fill me in on Kyoshi stuff. What have I missed out on?”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Suki thought, mouth full of noodles, and then swallowed. “Well, it’s been awhile since you visited, so let me think. Oh, we just finished training a new class of Warriors. They’re back on Kyoshi right now. This year’s class was… something.”</p><p class="p1">“Something?”</p><p class="p1">“They had a lot of… drama. One of them had a crush on another one, but then there was <em>another one</em> who had a crush on the first one… it got messy when they went on training maneuvers. Eventually I had to pull Chiyo and Misaki off each other after Chiyo put glue in Misaki’s facepaint.”</p><p class="p1">“Wow.”</p><p class="p1">“We couldn’t get the faceprint off for hours. The glue was uncalled for, but — honestly now I see where she’s coming from.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka winced. “Are you gonna put glue in my noodles?”</p><p class="p1">She laughed. “No, don’t worry.” Suki smiled, small and a little bit sad. “You know, I missed talking to you. You always make me laugh.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s chest felt warm, both from the noodles and seeing Suki crack a smile at him again. They tucked into their food for a while, silent but for the slurping of broth.</p><p class="p1">“I was wondering if I could ask you something,” Suki said.</p><p class="p1">“Shoot.”</p><p class="p1">“When we were together… did you know you liked boys?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused. It always startled him a little bit, how comfortable Suki seemed with facing the elephant-koi in the room head on.</p><p class="p1">“No. Well… I don’t know. I didn’t <em>think</em> I did. But now, looking back… there were some moments that make a lot more sense.”</p><p class="p1">“I know what you mean.”</p><p class="p1">“Really?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. There was this childhood friend of mine, we were super close. We slept over at each other’s houses all the time and stayed up talking the whole night. We got in a fight when I was like — thirteen, maybe? — and we stopped being friends, and honestly? It felt like a breakup. I didn’t know why I was so upset about it at the time. Now it’s like, <em>obviously</em> I liked her, but it wasn’t obvious to thirteen-year-old me.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka smiled. “You had a crush on her.”</p><p class="p1">“Clearly.” She chuckled.</p><p class="p1">“I spent a lot of time watching the older boys train for battle. I wanted to be just like them — and, looking back, it didn’t hurt that a few of them were pretty easy on the eyes, too.”</p><p class="p1">“You didn’t have any little crushes?” Suki teased, poking his hand lightly with a chopstick.</p><p class="p1">“Not really. I wasn’t super close with anyone growing up, and I always assumed that because I liked girls that meant I didn’t like boys.”</p><p class="p1">“But you can like both.” Suki smiled at him.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I’ve figured that out now.” Sokka stuffed another glob of noodles into his mouth. “It’s nice to talk about this with you. I haven’t really been able to talk to anyone else who gets it. Aang’s great, but… figuring this stuff out about yourself, it’s confusing at first.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re telling me. For the longest time I’d just convinced myself that all girls thought about kissing other girls sometimes. Anyways. I’m glad to be here to talk to.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko heard a peal of laughter from out across the gardens, and he picked his head up from where he was bent over the newest play from Hayao Mishima. It was a retelling of a classic Fire Nation fairy tale, of a cursed prince and wolf trying to save a forest spirit, and he’d been enthralled until the bright laughter broke him out of the fantasy world.</p><p class="p1">Suki and Sokka emerged from behind a hedge, strolling along the path together, Suki giggling at something Sokka had said. Zuko couldn’t hear their conversation at such a distance, curled up in an armchair on his balcony, but Sokka was beaming, gesturing animatedly.</p><p class="p1">Zuko watched them walk together, falling into step easily with each other, Suki making a joke and getting a laugh out of Sokka in return. She was teasing him, it seemed, and Sokka was taking it good-naturedly. They followed where the path turned, looping back toward the entrance to the gardens.</p><p class="p1">He turned his eyes back down to the play, but Zuko couldn’t concentrate on the words anymore; their laughter rang in his head. <em>He’s so happy with her.</em> He shut the book and took a breath, looking out at the now-empty courtyard.</p><p class="p1"><em>They just work. Even after what happened at the anniversary, they’re getting along so well… maybe they were meant to be together. Do I just drive people apart? I drove Mai away. </em>The breeze lifted a few strands of long hair into Zuko’s face, and he brushed them back. <em>I was the one who kissed him in the first place. I made everything more confusing for him.</em></p><p class="p1">He wasn’t going to be able to focus on the play any time soon, so he set it on a side table and descended the stone balcony steps, going to the one place he knew would bring him at least a little peace.</p><p class="p1">His robes pooled around him as he sat, cross-legged at the edge of the turtleduck pond. He tugged at the blades of grass next to him, breaking some off and letting them fall on the ground. A turtleduck paddled over, quacking.</p><p class="p1">“I don’t have any snacks for you right now. Sorry,” Zuko said, but the turtleduck just quacked again and nibbled at the duckweed growing along the pond’s edge.</p><p class="p1">“What do you think I should do?” No response from the turtleduck. “He said he loved me, but… I know how much she meant to him. Still means to him. Am I just mucking everything up?”</p><p class="p1">Another turtleduck joined the first, interested in the snack the duckweed offered.</p><p class="p1">“Suki must hate my guts. She spent all that time guarding me, and this is how I repay her.” He flopped back onto the grass. “By stealing the man she loved. I don’t know why she hasn’t ripped my head off already.”</p><p class="p1">He sighed. “And at least with Suki he could be open, he didn’t have to worry about me and all my baggage… being the Fire Lord and having people talk about me behind my back. People spitting on me.” Zuko rubbed his forehead and sat back up, and the turtleducks looked up at him curiously.</p><p class="p1">“Any advice?” A quack, then more nibbling. “Hm. Didn’t think so.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Suki and Akiko, another Kyoshi Warrior, stayed close behind Zuko while he strode down the length of the dock. Suki didn’t <em>adore</em> having to spend so much time around him, but she was determined not to let her personal life get in the way of doing her job. She wasn’t some half-trained Warrior, bickering and putting glue in other girls’ facepaint. She was their Commander, and she was going to act like it.</p><p class="p1">“Sir,” Zuko intoned, dipping his head in a crisp nod to the ship’s captain, a grizzled man with a small gold hoop in each earlobe.</p><p class="p1">The captain fell to the ground, prostrating himself. “Fire Lord Zuko — they didn’t tell me you were coming personally —”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, there’s no need for all that,” Zuko said, waving a hand.</p><p class="p1">The captain looked up, confused, and Zuko waved his hand again, with more emphasis.</p><p class="p1">“Captain, we have business to take care of, don’t we?”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, yes, of course Your Highness. Let me just get the logbook —” The captain rushed on board, scrambling for the cabin.</p><p class="p1">Suki stepped next to Zuko, hands clasped behind her back. “Zuko,” she began, and he jolted. “I startled you.”</p><p class="p1">“Uh, no, Commander. It’s alright.”</p><p class="p1">“I was just curious… <em>why</em> are you inspecting this shipment yourself? Couldn’t you send your Minister of Trade? Or one of the Trade secretaries?”</p><p class="p1">“I could. But this is our first official shipment to the Southern Water Tribe; I want to be sure everything goes exactly as planned. Sokka put so much effort into this.”</p><p class="p1">The captain returned, battered notepad in hand. “Your Highness, if you’ll follow me, we can go over the cargo stores.”</p><p class="p1">The four of them trudged across the gangplank as the captain bragged about the quality of his ship and his crew, <em>the finest shipmen in the Fire Nation, your Highness, </em>ticking off names on the list in his notepad. Zuko looked up at the bulkhead, shading his eyes and squinting against the sun.</p><p class="p1">Suki watched Zuko loop around the deck, asking the captain questions about the class of ship, the engine, other ship-related things Suki couldn’t really follow. Something about breaking ice. The last time Suki had seen Zuko, she had guarded a teenager unsure of himself, thrown overboard; some five years on, he’d gained his sea legs, growing more confident, his shoulders held back and resolute.</p><p class="p1">Now that she thought about it, his shoulders had grown broader, too. <em>He’s taller than I remember… he has a sharper jaw. Maybe that was what Sokka — wait — was that —</em></p><p class="p1">The hairs on the back of Suki’s neck stood up, and then she saw it — the hood, the glint of metal — she followed her instinct and tackled Zuko to the ground, a trio of darts whizzing through the air where their bodies had been.</p><p class="p1">“Suki!” Zuko exclaimed, indignant.</p><p class="p1">“Assassins,” she hissed, and leapt up as Akiko deflected another volley of darts with her metal fans. “The other ship,” she yelled to the warrior, and then they were in hot pursuit, racing down the gangplank and onto the deck of the ship on the other side of the dock.</p><p class="p1">Suki’s feet pounded against the boards. The assassin was agile, leaping to the prow of another ship, hauling themselves up and over the railing. Suki looked to Akiko, jerking her head to the right, and they jumped back down onto the dock, flying down the side of the ship and on to the next, a large junk manned by a crew in the middle of loading their hold.</p><p class="p1">She caught another flash of them — <em>stupid, wearing black in broad daylight </em>— and followed the assassin into a mess of crates, side-stepping confused sailors and twisting around stacks of barrels. Suki was almost there, she almost had them — they’d managed to get up onto the roof of the cabin, and teetered on the edge of a jump to another ship below. Suki ascended, leaping off a crate, and the assassin took the jump, landing roughly on the other ship’s deck. Suki followed close behind, easing her jump by clinging to a sail’s rope.</p><p class="p1">The assassin stumbled for a moment before taking off again, moving towards the gangplank, but Akiko had stayed on the dock and was waiting to cut them off. The assassin swerved, back onto the deck, and that was all the time Suki needed to place a few chi-blocking blows to their shoulder, hip, and solar plexus — with that, the assassin dropped like a sack of cabbages.</p><p class="p1">This ship’s deck was empty of sailors at the moment, but a curious crowd was quickly gathering behind Akiko where she was standing in front of the gangplank. Suki was breathing hard, pulse thrumming with the thrill of the chase. She nudged the assassin’s body over so they were laid on their back, face hooded and covered from the nose down. Suki snatched the mask down, and the woman snarled at her, venom in her eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck you,” she spat. “Death to the usurper.”</p><p class="p1">Suki rose, standing over the woman. Her hand had fallen limply open, letting a few more darts tumble to the deck.</p><p class="p1">“Not today, it seems,” Suki said coldly.</p><p class="p1">A pair of royal guards pushed through the crowd, and Akiko let them past onto the deck.</p><p class="p1">“What’s going on here?”</p><p class="p1">Suki placed her hands on her hips. “This woman attempted to assassinate the Fire Lord.”</p><p class="p1">“We didn’t see —”</p><p class="p1">“Right. Well, if you don’t believe me, she’ll tell you so herself.”</p><p class="p1">The woman scowled. “The traitor took the throne from<em> our</em> rightful ruler, and you both are traitors for protecting him. Look at yourselves!”</p><p class="p1">The guards bristled. One of them leaned over her.</p><p class="p1">“Honestly, lady, I don’t give a shit who the rightful ruler is. All I know is, the old Fire Lord sent my son away to die, and this one brought my son back home.”</p><p class="p1">They hoisted her up, placing her wrists in metal cuffs and supporting her limp body as they left the deck of the ship.</p><p class="p1">Suki stepped down the gangplank, turning to Akiko.</p><p class="p1">“That was a close one,” Akiko said, sheathing her fans.</p><p class="p1">“It was.”</p><p class="p1">Suki pushed through the crowd as the commotion grew and more people ran over, asking about <em>what happened? An assassin? Is it a coup? No, the Fire Lord is fine. I saw him. When? Wait, what’s going on?</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko ran over to Suki when she emerged from the crowd.</p><p class="p1">“What —” he started, but she cut him off.</p><p class="p1">“We apprehended her, but we need to get you out of here. There could be accomplices.”</p><p class="p1">“Fine.”</p><p class="p1">Once they were in the carriage, slats on the windows snapped shut, moving at a clip back towards the palace, Suki let herself relax. Just a little.</p><p class="p1">“Are you okay?” Suki asked, reaching a hand out — she hesitated, then rested it lightly on Zuko’s knee across from her.</p><p class="p1">Zuko let out a breath. “Yeah, I’m okay. A little shaken, maybe.”</p><p class="p1">Suki sighed and sat back, hand moving to lay her sheathed sword across her lap, ready.</p><p class="p1">“I thought — I was foolish,” Zuko said, lips pressing together.</p><p class="p1">“Foolish?”</p><p class="p1">“I thought my people had begun to accept me. I thought things were changing, but, clearly they haven’t.” He turned to the side, brow tense.</p><p class="p1">“She was just a loyalist, Zuko. The people like you.”</p><p class="p1">“She’s one of the people, too!” His hands balled up in his robes. “They want me dead.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, do you know what the guard said, when he put her in cuffs?”</p><p class="p1">“…What.”</p><p class="p1">“That you brought his son home, and that’s all that mattered to him.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko stayed silent. He glanced at Suki from under his frown, and she tried to give him a comforting smile.</p><p class="p1">“The Fire Nation royal family hasn’t served their people in a long time. Things might not be perfect, but you can’t expect to undo a hundred years of history with just five.” She reached out to touch his knee again. “You have to keep trying. It matters to people.”</p><p class="p1">He huffed, but laid his hand over hers. His hand was warm, palm soft. Zuko blinked at her, eyes softening, and Suki felt her cheeks heat up. She pulled her hand back, folding it politely over her sword again. <em>Hm. That was… just a fluke. </em>Suki was grateful for the thick white facepaint.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Suki came to visit him later that night, the thick wooden door to his chambers creaking open just a sliver. Zuko saw Suki, still in her facepaint, peek her head in.</p><p class="p1">“You busy?” Suki asked softly, and Zuko nodded from across the table, so she stepped inside and shut the door quietly behind her.</p><p class="p1">“Did you have to station a whole platoon of Kyoshi Warriors at my doors?” Zuko asked, setting down his brush and leaving his memo for later. “I’m not an infant.”</p><p class="p1">A small smile broke Suki’s face. “No, you’re not. But you are the Fire Lord, and you did just survive an assassination attempt. I’d be negligent if I didn’t keep you guarded properly.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko stood from his chair as she approached the table, and then Suki just turned her face up at him and looked confused.</p><p class="p1">“What is it?” Zuko asked. His stomach twisted — <em>maybe she’s here to yell at me about Sokka. I suppose that’s long overdue —</em></p><p class="p1">“Oh. Nothing.” She blinked, then turned to the side. “I think I must be a little shaken from today, too, that’s all.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko moved around the table to sit on a floor cushion, leaning back against the leg of a chair. He rubbed his eyes, itchy from exhaustion.</p><p class="p1">“It’s weird… that wasn’t even the worst one, but I feel so frazzled.”</p><p class="p1">Suki sat on a cushion next to him, green robes pooling around her.</p><p class="p1">“It was the first one in a long time. Years, right?”</p><p class="p1">“Not since you were here last.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko pulled his hair out of it’s topknot, sighing at the feeling. If he tied it too tight, keeping it up all day long eventually started to hurt.</p><p class="p1">Suki tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, which was pink.</p><p class="p1">“Oh. Did you burn your ears in the sun?” Zuko asked. “They’re red. I have an aloe lotion that'll help,” he said, moving to stand. He wanted to be as gracious as possible, given everything that had happened.</p><p class="p1">“No no, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it,” Suki said hurriedly.</p><p class="p1">“Okay. If you say so.” Zuko paused. “How did you learn to be a commander?”</p><p class="p1">“What do you mean?”</p><p class="p1">“Like, how did you figure it all out? You’re always so calm and collected, and the Kyoshi Warriors would follow you into battle no matter what. They love you.”</p><p class="p1">Suki grinned. “Thanks for saying that. I don’t think I’m always as calm and collected as I might seem. I guess a lot of it just comes with time, learning from experience. I know my Warriors, and they know me, so we work well as a team.”</p><p class="p1"><em>A team. </em>“I wish I had a team.”</p><p class="p1">She laughed, startling Zuko, but it made his chest feel tight. In a good way. “You do have a team, stupid.”</p><p class="p1">“Who are you calling stupid?” he grumbled, letting himself have a smile, a tiny, tentative one. It felt like in that insult, Suki had told him, <em>you can tease me back now. You can be my friend again.</em></p><p class="p1">“You, the densest Fire Lord ever.” She gave his arm a soft punch. “What do you call Aang and the rest of us? Your acquaintances?”</p><p class="p1">“You’re my friends, but —”</p><p class="p1">“<em>We’re</em> your team. Now stop moping.” She’d pulled out her commander voice. “You’re the Fire Lord, and Fire Lords don’t mope.”</p><p class="p1">“I’ll try my best.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko caught himself grinning at her. <em>How does she do that? Just ten minutes ago I was so anxious, and now I feel like I could take on anything.</em></p><p class="p1">“Alright, I’ll leave you alone now.” Suki rose and stepped towards the door. “There are four Warriors at each door if you need anything.”</p><p class="p1">“I still think it’s overkill.”</p><p class="p1">“And I don’t care!” Suki said, not turning around, opening the double doors.</p><p class="p1">“Suki,” Zuko said, and she paused. “Thanks.”</p><p class="p1">She dipped out quickly, and the doors slid shut with a heavy <em>thunk</em>.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Suki stopped in her tracks, doubling back to the doorway to Zuko’s formal offices. The door was ajar, the room still lit with candles burnt low. Zuko was slumped over the desk, brush still in his limp hand.</p><p class="p1">She rushed in, fearing the worst, shaking his shoulders.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, Zuko are you alright —”</p><p class="p1">He jolted awake, flinging the paintbrush to the side, smearing ink on a set of papers.</p><p class="p1">“Huh? Who’s? I’m ready,” he mumbled, and Suki let out a sigh of relief. <em>The Fire Lord’s fine. He’s fine.</em></p><p class="p1">She chuckled, and Zuko rubbed his eyes blearily.</p><p class="p1">“I was just resting my eyes…” Zuko was grumbling into his sleeves, eyes still half-closed.</p><p class="p1">Suki smacked him lightly. “You almost gave me a heart attack! I thought you’d been assassinated!”</p><p class="p1">“No. ‘M not assassinated.”</p><p class="p1">Suki moved around to the back of his chair, fitting her hands under Zuko’s arms and nudging him into a standing position.</p><p class="p1">“Come on, get up. You’re going to sleep in your quarters, where my Warriors can do their jobs. You know, you keep passing out in deserted offices and you might actually have one of these loyalists succeed.”</p><p class="p1">“’S not a big deal,” Zuko whined, but drifted to the door at Suki’s guidance.</p><p class="p1">They were almost the whole way to Zuko’s residential quarters when Suki realized she’d had her hand at the small of his back the entire time, and she pulled it away, balling it up at her side.</p><p class="p1">“You really don’t need to worry that much,” Zuko said, pulling open the door to his rooms. “I’ll be fine if I take a nap.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you think I don’t take my job seriously?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko hung his head. “No, you take it very seriously.”</p><p class="p1">“Exactly. You might be the Fire Lord, but at least with this, you have to listen to me.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko slid into the room and the door swung shut once again.</p><p class="p1">Suki sighed and gave a nod to each pair of Warriors, standing at either side of the double doors. “Have a good shift, ladies.”</p><p class="p1">“Goodnight, Suki.”</p><p class="p1">She was still thinking about it when she was alone in her room, washing her makeup off. <em>He needs to take better care of himself. One man can only be so dedicated to his work before he burns himself out. </em>She scrubbed harder at her face. <em>He’s too hard on himself. He’s improved so much. He looked cute all sleepy like that —</em> Suki put her washcloth down, staring at herself in the mirror.</p><p class="p1">“Get it together, Suki,” she said, and shook her head a little. <em>It’s been a while, that’s all. I can just — see where Sokka’s coming from. That’s it. I get why Sokka fell for him, spending nights together working…</em></p><p class="p1">Suki tucked into bed and yanked the covers over her. <em>I just need a good night’s sleep, that’s all.</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Yes, that was a Princess Mononoke reference. And I promise the next chapter will be spicy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. It's Complicated</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka gets an idea, and makes some travel plans.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Another one! I'm on a writing kick, so I'm gonna ride this burst of motivation for all its worth.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka entered the breezeway, spotting Suki leaning against the railing at the other end. He bounded over, calling her name. She gave him a smile and waved him over.</p><p class="p1">“Hey! How’s it going?” he asked, wrapping her up in a hug.</p><p class="p1">She patted his back lightly. “Good. Just keeping an eye on the Fire Lord, like usual.” She gestured to her side, out at Zuko exchanging blows with Ty Lee in the courtyard below the breezeway.</p><p class="p1">“You’ll have to be quicker than that, Zuzu!” Ty Lee crowed, dancing around Zuko like air.</p><p class="p1">“You’ve had to do that a lot, lately, huh,” Sokka mused. “You’d tell me if you had any more scares, right?”</p><p class="p1">Suki bumped his shoulder with hers. “Of course I would. I’m just trying to be cautious.”</p><p class="p1">“Good.” Sokka leaned against the railing. “If something happened to him…”</p><p class="p1">“Nothing’s gonna happen to him. What, you don’t have any faith in me?”</p><p class="p1">Suki leaned next to him, and the pair watched Zuko and Ty Lee have at it. Without bending, Ty Lee pretty much had him beat. They were following house rules: no bending, no chi-blocking, to keep the playing field even. Well, as even as it could be when Ty Lee could twist out of the way of every strike Zuko threw at her. He was panting, frustrated, kept turning in a circle by Ty Lee’s maneuvering.</p><p class="p1">“You know, I’m beginning to see why you’re so smitten with him,” Suki states, and Sokka looks at her in surprise. She’s still leaning against the railing, casual as anything, watching the match absently.</p><p class="p1">“Excuse me?”</p><p class="p1">“I’m just saying, I get it. Dedicated, smart, self-sacrificing. He’s always staying up too late working. It’s sweet.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka was speechless. He stuttered, casting around for the words to communicate the amount of <em>huh??? </em>going through his brain.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, calm down. Stars, Sokka, you make such a big <em>deal </em>out of everything, like when I told you about Ty Lee.”</p><p class="p1">“You just called him sweet.”</p><p class="p1">“What? Don’t you agree with me?”</p><p class="p1">“Well, yes, but —” Sokka shut up. Suki was watching both combatants intently, now, both of them sweaty and panting.</p><p class="p1">“Is this what you spend all day doing, then?” Sokka teased. “Ogling my boyfriend and your — friend?”</p><p class="p1">Suki scoffed. “No! I have a very important job to do, managing the royal security.” She smirked. “How dare you insinuate I might have ulterior motives.”</p><p class="p1">“Suuuure,” Sokka wheedled. “Just like there were no ulterior motives when Zuko and I sparred, either.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s how it happened? Figures. <em>Boys</em>. Can never just say what they want.”</p><p class="p1">“And you can?”</p><p class="p1">“I’m very straightforward. In fact, <em>Sokka</em>, I pride myself on my communication skills.” Her eyes were narrowed, a wolfish smile curling at her mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Then what do you want, Suki?”</p><p class="p1">“Why don’t you get in the ring, next?” Her eyes were glittering.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s breath caught, and he realized his heart had been pounding against his chest. It felt dangerous, the way they were talking, dancing closer towards something that would violate their <em>just friends</em> agreement. Her eyes dared him to topple off that cliff, but he had to back away, he <em>had to</em>. <em>I couldn’t do that to Zuko.</em></p><p class="p1">“Very funny,” Sokka grumbled, turning away again, and Suki didn’t press it.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko tapped his knuckles on the door lightly, papers in hand. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, waiting for a response.</p><p class="p1">“Just a minute!” came Suki’s voice, high and sweet, so Zuko waited patiently, until she popped the door open.</p><p class="p1">She was clearly fresh from a bath, hair damp and just-fluffed, not a stitch of facepaint, wrapped in a fluffy bathrobe. Her eyelashes were still wet, dark and shiny — <em>she smells like pine needles, do we even have that bath scent here in the palace? </em>— Zuko pushed the thought away.</p><p class="p1">He held up his papers. “Hi.”</p><p class="p1">“Hi,” she said, bewildered but a little amused. “And these are…?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh. Yeah, I finished that letter, I was wondering if you’d, uhm, read it for me first.”</p><p class="p1">“Right, right. The governor of Gao Ling, you told me.” She reached up to grab the papers, fingers brushing Zuko’s knuckles. He didn’t <em>think</em> he was that flighty, but the touch made Zuko’s hand flinch, sending the papers fluttering to the ground.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, I’m sorry, sorry about that —” Zuko muttered, bending to pick up the scattered sheets, trying to get them back in order.</p><p class="p1">Suki bent as well, collecting a few pages, and Zuko would swear up and down that he wasn’t looking on purpose, it was just that… well, at that angle, the bathrobe fell just a little further open, and the soft curve of her chest was <em>right there</em>, and Zuko couldn’t help his mouth going dry and his cheeks going hot. It was a physical reaction, okay? He tried to keep his eyes on the ground, fussing with the sheets of paper, ordering them and re-ordering them, and then Suki handed him the pages she’d picked up.</p><p class="p1">His eyes caught at that same curve again before meeting her eyes, and he felt his face burn when she arched a brow, so he stood quickly and tried to straighten the bundle of paper.</p><p class="p1">“Here you go. Sorry about that.” Suki took the letter and didn’t say anything. “I’m gonna go now.” Zuko turned on his heel and rushed down the hall, desperate to get out from under Suki’s gaze. Sometimes, he was sure that gaze was telepathic.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">He was breathless, laid back against the bed, sure that Zuko had sucked his soul right out of him for good this time. Sokka turned to look at Zuko, wiping himself down with a washcloth shakily.</p><p class="p1">“Let me,” Sokka said, taking it from him and brushing Zuko’s fussing hands away.</p><p class="p1">“Fine,” Zuko grumbled, a word that turned into a breathy sigh when Sokka lifted Zuko’s leg up, brushing softly between his legs. Sokka knew from experience it was a little startling, the cool touch of the cloth, but never unwelcome.</p><p class="p1">“You ride me like that again, I might actually pass away, and then we’d have an international incident on our hands,” Sokka quipped, moving the cloth gently, and Zuko swatted Sokka’s head.</p><p class="p1">“You’re ridiculous,” Zuko said, quiet and happy.</p><p class="p1">“And yet, you love me.” Sokka could feel the stupid grin on his face.</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm.” Zuko relaxed, leaning his head back and closing his eyes.</p><p class="p1">Sokka took his sweet time, running the cool cloth over the skin just where Zuko’s leg met his groin, pressing soft kisses to Zuko’s inner thighs. When Zuko’s hand came to rest on Sokka’s head, he stilled.</p><p class="p1">“No more, please. ’S too much.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka gave his thigh one last kiss. “I know. Wasn’t looking for more. Just like kissing you.”</p><p class="p1">They lazed on top of the blankets, limbs hanging loosely over each other, letting their skin cool off after getting so heated and sweaty.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s fingers worried at a loose thread on the seam of a pillowcase, pulling and tugging, mouth terse.</p><p class="p1">Sokka laid a hand over Zuko’s nervous fingers. “What’s on your mind, duckie?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko looked at him, opened his mouth to say something, then stopped.</p><p class="p1">“You can tell me anything. Promise.”</p><p class="p1">He looked skeptical. “I dunno… I feel like it’s probably best if I just don’t say anything.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, now that you’ve said that I’m gonna worry about it until you tell me what it is.” Sokka pressed his forehead to Zuko’s. “I’ll never let you know peace.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko huffed. “Fine, but let the record show you asked for it.” He took a shaky breath, fingers fussing at the thread again. “So. Suki’s warmed up to me again, it’s not as awkward. You know.”</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm. I’m glad you guys are friends again.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. We’ve had to spend a lot of time around each other, so. It’s good that it’s not awkward.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko took a long pause, and Sokka looked at him expectantly. <em>Getting him to talk about stuff can be like pulling teeth, sometimes, and he’s been especially clammed up about Suki. It’s an awkward situation, after all…</em></p><p class="p1">“Are you gonna get to the point…?”</p><p class="p1">“She’s really pretty. And smart,” Zuko blurted. “Like, I see why you were into her.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka rolled his eyes. “That’s what Suki said, too.”</p><p class="p1">“Suki said she was pretty?”</p><p class="p1">“No, she said that <em>you</em> were pretty. Well, not verbatim, but. The whole ‘I see why you’re into him’ thing.”</p><p class="p1">“She did? She told you that?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, while you and Ty Lee were half-naked and sweaty.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko chuckled, surprised, but his smile fell when he saw Sokka’s mischievous grin.</p><p class="p1">“You have an idea, don’t you,” Zuko groaned, shoving his head into a pillow.</p><p class="p1">Did Sokka ever.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka sidled in the next night, locking the thick wooden doors behind him, with a dangerous grin on his face that made Zuko’s joints feel like jelly. Sokka had something planned, he knew it, but Sokka had refused to tell him what, exactly — a punishment for Zuko’s confession, surely. Teasing him until he begged, making him scream while the Kyoshi guards could hear, <em>something</em> — and the look Sokka was giving him was nothing short of devilish.</p><p class="p1">Zuko had <em>just</em> been enjoying reading his play, curled up under a blanket now that autumn was nipping at the air. He’d gotten a fire going, and the light from the flames flickered on Sokka’s face as he closed the distance between them, bringing a knee up to straddle Zuko’s hips and press him back onto the couch, still grinning like a wolfbat.</p><p class="p1">He stayed there, watching Zuko squirm. Zuko just wanted to get on with it, whatever Sokka was going to do to him, but Sokka had him pinned, and the longer Sokka waited the more worked up Zuko got himself.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pressed his hips down into Zuko’s, and chuckled when he finally got a groan out of him.</p><p class="p1">“What are you so worked up for?” Sokka asked innocently, grinding hard and deep, and Zuko barely choked back a whimper. Sokka laughed again, and Zuko felt like he was melting into the couch. <em>He’s fucking playing with me. Why am I letting him?</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko leaned up, trying to get Sokka in his lap and regain some sense of control over the situation, but Sokka pinned his shoulders back down and tutted.</p><p class="p1">“Ah, ah. Don’t you wanna know what my idea is?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was panting. He thought about saying no, just to spite Sokka, but curiosity got the best of him: “Yes.”</p><p class="p1">“Then stay still. I have something I wanna do first.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled off, tossing the blanket to the side. Zuko had put away his Fire Lording for the night, so he only had a thin set of sleeping robes on, tied loosely at his waist.</p><p class="p1">“Perfect,” Sokka murmured, “Makes my job so much easier.”</p><p class="p1">He pulled the robes back, slowly, letting Zuko feel exposed, the cool air wisping across his skin.</p><p class="p1">“Baby,” he said, reverently, tongue already on Zuko’s abdomen, starting at his scar and moving quickly south. “So ready.”</p><p class="p1">“For you, for you,” Zuko moaned, hips flexing. “Sokka, please.”</p><p class="p1">“Please, what?”</p><p class="p1">“Go down on me. Please.”</p><p class="p1">Evidently, it wasn’t begging Sokka had in mind, because then Zuko was enveloped in the slick wet heat of Sokka’s mouth. Zuko grabbed hold of the arm of the couch, fingers digging into the upholstery. Sokka was going after him quick, intense, tongue working overtime. His fingers dug into the meat of Zuko’s hips, <em>shoving</em> Zuko towards release — and then he pulled off, just as suddenly as he’d started.</p><p class="p1">Zuko whined, picking his head up to look imploringly down at his boyfriend.</p><p class="p1">“Come on, Sokka. <em>Please</em>.”</p><p class="p1">“I thought you wanted to hear about my idea.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko screwed his eyes shut and groaned, frustrated. “Yes, I wanna know.”</p><p class="p1">“I was thinking… you know, Suki’s right there. Just outside the door. I could just… go get her.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s stomach fell through the floor. “Sokka —”</p><p class="p1">“Or not. It’s just an idea, after all.” Sokka started folding Zuko’s robes back over him, tying them loosely with the sash, doing absolutely nothing to conceal the erection Sokka had left Zuko with. He felt lightheaded.</p><p class="p1">“Are you sure she even wants to?” Zuko hissed.</p><p class="p1">Sokka grinned. “So that’s a yes?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko swallowed. “I’m — yeah. If you don’t think it’ll ruin everything —”</p><p class="p1">“Suki!” Sokka called, moving to the door to unlock it. “Hey, Suki!”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Stars</em>, Sokka, you could’ve given me a little warning,” Zuko yelped, pulling the blanket over his lap, curling in on himself.</p><p class="p1">Sokka opened the door, and then Suki was there, hair down, barefaced. She looked uncharacteristically hesitant, staying close to the door, watching Zuko closely.</p><p class="p1">“You’re — you’re not on duty?” Zuko asked dumbly. She was just in her sleepclothes and slippers.</p><p class="p1">Suki shook her head.</p><p class="p1">“You were waiting outside?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka took Suki’s hand and led her over, but she stayed standing at a safe distance.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka asked me about this yesterday… I don’t know. I thought it might be fun.” Suki kept her hands clasped in front of her.</p><p class="p1">Sokka settled next to Zuko on the couch, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “I think so, too. What do you think, Zuko?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko couldn’t process; he felt dizzy and hot all over, still clutching the blanket to his lap. The shirt Suki was wearing fell lightly over her body, and the moment of her in that bathrobe flashed in his mind. <em>Not helping my lap situation.</em></p><p class="p1">“Um.” Zuko didn’t know what he wanted to say. <em>Yes, yes, yes? </em>The thought made him sweat, but then again, <em>this could go so wrong, so fast. </em></p><p class="p1">“I think it would be fun, too,” Zuko started, trying to be careful with his words given his state. “I just don’t want it to make things… more confusing than they already are.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah,” Sokka said, fingers playing with a strand of Zuko’s hair, “but, you already know that you think she’s hot, right? And she knows. And you know that she thinks you’re hot.”</p><p class="p1">Suki blushed and ran a hand through her hair. “Zuko, if you’re worried about my feelings getting hurt, it’s okay. I’m not gonna… get in the way of you two.” She smiled. “I have other stuff going on, too, you know.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, I, I wasn’t saying —”</p><p class="p1">“I know.” Suki finally approached him, standing over the two men. “So. Should I stay?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko hesitated, then licked his lips and nodded. Suki moved slowly, laying her hands on Zuko’s shoulders, tracing up the lines of his neck to cup his face. He felt like he was drunk, high, dreaming, and then Suki reached down for the blanket.</p><p class="p1">“Let’s get this out of the way,” she said, placing it to their side, and smiled when she saw how Zuko’s robes were tented. “Someone’s excited,” she smirked.</p><p class="p1">“It’s Sokka’s fault,” Zuko breathed, almost afraid to speak, unsure of what to do with his hands.</p><p class="p1">“Guilty as charged,” Sokka said, low in his throat, pressing a kiss to Zuko’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Naughty,” Suki chided, and Zuko’s skin tingled.</p><p class="p1">She straddled him, shifting into place on Zuko’s lap, cupping his face again. Suki looked at him carefully, thumbs rubbing at his cheekbones, one touching lightly at his scar. Zuko gazed up at her, her skin glowing in the firelight — he had to be dreaming.</p><p class="p1">“Kiss me,” he whispered, and she obliged with a soft press of her lips to his.</p><p class="p1">They were divine, featherlight, sweeter than honey, and then she pulled back, turning to Sokka and grinning. Zuko realized Sokka had a hand on her inner thigh, looking at them like he had just been given a present tied up with ribbon.</p><p class="p1">“Okay, you too,” Suki said, bestowing a kiss on Sokka. He had to press close to Zuko and Suki to make it work, with Suki twisting to the side, so Zuko had an up-close view of the easy fit of their mouths, their tongues sliding against each other. To his surprise, the thing that curled in his gut was a desperate heat, not jealousy.</p><p class="p1">Zuko finally, finally put his hands on Suki, and once he did he couldn’t get enough. He wanted to touch her thighs, her waist, that soft curve of her chest — he wanted to taste. Zuko slid his hands up under her shirt, coasting along the smooth expanse of her back, fingers gripping and pulling her tighter onto his lap. She moaned into Sokka’s mouth, breaking the kiss to pull her shirt up and over her head, tossing it aimlessly to the side, and then Sokka pulled her into a messy kiss again.</p><p class="p1">Zuko swore; getting to see her, all toned muscle from her training, right there in his lap, made him throb, painfully hard already. He cupped a breast, massaging, running the pad of his thumb over her nipple gently. He thought if he wasn’t careful, he was going to start drooling.</p><p class="p1">When Zuko rolled it softly between two fingers, Suki moaned, and Sokka chuckled, hand moving to explore between her legs, palm spreading over her thin trousers. His hand brushed Zuko’s erection in the process, shifting the fabric covering him and surprising a little gasp out of him.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck, you’re both —” Sokka started, then lost his train of thought in Suki’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">Zuko managed to tear his eyes away from her chest, looking down to see Sokka’s hand teasing at Suki, who’d soaked right through her trousers, and Zuko’s gut lurched. He slid a hand next to Sokka’s, wanting to feel. Their hands tangled together awkwardly in the small space, and Sokka chuckled again.</p><p class="p1">“You wanna?” Sokka asked, and Zuko moaned a <em>yes, please, </em>so Sokka left the work to him.</p><p class="p1">The fabric was slick and wet, and when Zuko cupped his palm to her, Suki choked out a moan, thighs tensing. He could feel her through the thin fabric, fingers pressing just barely between her folds, and Zuko was so hard he thought he might pass out. His hips tilted up of their own accord, pressing his fingers harder against her, and the shift forced Suki out of her kiss with Sokka. She fell forward, wrapping her arms around Zuko’s shoulders and tucking her head into the crook of his neck, panting like she’d just run a mile.</p><p class="p1">“Here, stand up,” Sokka said, tugging at Suki’s waistband. “Gotta take these off.”</p><p class="p1">She pulled back, legs a bit wobbly, and Sokka tugged her trousers down. Zuko reached forward, grabbing for her hips and waist, needing her weight in his lap.</p><p class="p1">“You want me back here?” Suki asked, settling back into position. “You wanna touch me, don’t you?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko nodded eagerly, and she gave him another kiss, messier than the first one, full of tongues and teeth. He slid his hand back between them, shoulder shifting to get the angle right, elated to feel soft, damp hair and slick folds. Zuko’s fingers dipped, teasing, and Suki sighed into his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, right — right —” she stammered, then whined when his fingers found that spot they were looking for, “right there. Stay right there.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko followed her instructions to the letter, working his fingers firmly and letting her shudder in his lap. He mouthed at her neck, listening to those beautiful sighs, getting higher and breathier, until Sokka groaned and grabbed at their legs.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t I get a turn?” he complained, and Zuko laughed against the skin of Suki’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Fine,” he said, and let Suki slide off his lap. “Let’s go to bed. This couch isn’t big enough for the three of us.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko led the way, parting the curtain to his bedchamber for them.</p><p class="p1">“Your bed is huge,” Suki said as Sokka leapt onto it, tossing his clothes to the side.</p><p class="p1">He made a <em>c’mere</em> motion with his hands, and when Suki approached he rolled her onto her back, settling between her legs. She was breathless, smiling, cheeks pink, and Zuko would never complain about getting to see Sokka from behind, <em>how does he have such a great ass… </em>Zuko went to the side table, rummaging through the drawers, and glanced back to see Sokka’s tongue laving over Suki, arms curled around her legs to grip her hips tightly. The glee in his eyes, it made Zuko have to choke down a little groan.</p><p class="p1">Zuko caught Suki’s eyes, glazed over and blissful, and her lips looked so good he wanted to bite into them. He settled for a kiss, and she moaned into it, fingers tangling in his long hair. But Zuko had plans, so he pulled away, moving behind Sokka. Suki’s head fell back, and her hand fluttered to Sokka’s head, pulling him closer.</p><p class="p1">Zuko slicked up his fingers with the lotion he’d snatched from the side table, then pressed a finger to Sokka, rubbing around the rim gently. Sokka grunted, picking his head up for a moment.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck yeah, Zuko. Want your fingers so bad,” he groaned, and Suki’s eyes lit up. She moved her hand to hold his chin.</p><p class="p1">“You want him inside you?” Suki asked, grinning. Sokka nodded, wolftail bobbing. “You like when he opens you up?”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Yes</em>, I love it. Please, I want one, Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">So he slid one in, and it was tight — usually Sokka was the one doing the opening — so Zuko rubbed his other hand over the curve of Sokka’s hip, and he sighed, limbs relaxing. Sokka bent his head back down, returning to work with enthusiasm, judging by the way Suki took a shuddering breath and the way her eyes fluttered shut.</p><p class="p1">The initial tensing fell away quickly, so Zuko worked a second finger in, thumb brushing soft against the rim, and then Sokka’s hips were moving back toward Zuko in desperate little thrusts. He was mumbling something, muffled in between Suki’s thighs, and then she pulled his head up.</p><p class="p1">“Speak clearly, honey,” she said shakily.</p><p class="p1">“More, want more,” Sokka moaned, voice cracking a little bit. “So fucking good.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah?” Zuko had one hand inside Sokka, the other tugging at himself, desperate for friction. He worked another finger inside, careful, pressing until he heard Sokka whine, hips flexing. The sight of the muscles in Sokka’s back tensing, relaxing, head bent against Suki… Zuko was close already, so he pulled his hand back from his cock, breathing hard through it. <em>Not yet.</em></p><p class="p1">When Sokka was urging back against him, whining, Zuko pulled his fingers out and untied his robe, slicking himself up. Even just the slide of his own fingers had him aching, so Zuko didn’t waste any time and lined himself up, tip pressing in gentle. He knew Sokka liked to go slow at first, to get used to the length of him.</p><p class="p1">“Shit, that’s…” Sokka had his cheek laid against Suki’s thigh, and she was petting his hair, looking between Sokka and Zuko with wide eyes. “That’s so good, baby. Your cock — I’m not gonna last long.”</p><p class="p1">“Me neither,” Zuko gasped, locking eyes with Suki as he pushed in, rocking his hips in tiny thrusts that wrung the sweetest sounds out of Sokka’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">He bottomed out, and Sokka started pushing back against him, Zuko’s cue to start in earnest.</p><p class="p1">“You think you can keep going down on me?” Suki asked Sokka, cupping his face in her hands. “It felt amazing.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka nodded, burying his face in her again, and Suki cried out, a delighted smile on her face.</p><p class="p1">It was the fantasy Zuko didn’t know he had, Sokka spread out in front of him with Suki, her eyes half-closed, Sokka’s shoulder shifting and managing to get his fingers inside her, too… the tight heat of Sokka wrapped around him, Sokka pushing back against him like his life depended on it, the delicious moans coming out of the both of them —</p><p class="p1">Zuko came almost embarrassingly fast, so hard that when he shut his eyes he saw stars. He bent over Sokka, clutching his hips and coming in stuttering thrusts.</p><p class="p1">Sokka stayed put as Zuko gingerly pulled out, the muscles in Sokka’s shoulder flexing as he worked his fingers inside Suki. Zuko didn’t know what else to do other than run his hands over the curve of Sokka’s hips and watch — Suki was close, too, from the look of it.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck,” Suki breathed, grasping at the covers, “You’re gonna make me — shit.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko moved to her side, pulling her into a kiss that was more Suki gasping into his mouth than anything else, and her hands dropped the sheets to get a handful of Zuko’s robe, still hanging off his shoulders.</p><p class="p1">“Look so beautiful,” Zuko sighed, and Suki responded with a high whine.</p><p class="p1">He pulled away to watch, Sokka’s eyes lidded and glassy, and then Suki yanked Zuko’s robe tighter and she came, her hips rolling against Sokka’s mouth. It was gorgeous, Suki’s torso flexing and Sokka moaning into her.</p><p class="p1">When they both relaxed, Zuko went to get a wet cloth for Sokka. He heard Suki laugh, and Sokka mumble something. Zuko returned, flipping Sokka over, and Suki pulled herself up into a sitting position against the pillows.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was still hard against his stomach, so Zuko wrapped a hand around him as he wiped carefully with the cloth, stroking slowly, and Sokka keened. Suki grasped his outstretched hand.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, you still haven’t come — look at you, so patient,” Suki purred, and Sokka groaned.</p><p class="p1">Zuko bent to lick up the length of him, tossing the soiled cloth to the ground. He closed his eyes, ready to lose himself in making Sokka feel good. The whole thing, having Suki there with them, had made him feel like he was pushed overboard, but at least <em>this</em> was something he knew exactly how to do.</p><p class="p1">He felt a hand at his shoulder, and pulled off of Sokka. Zuko hadn’t noticed Suki leave her spot at the head of the bed, but now she was knelt alongside Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“Let me. You boys have been doing all the work,” she said. Zuko left her to it with a quick kiss, moving to let Sokka’s head lay in his lap.</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked up at Zuko, catching Zuko’s hand in his, with glazed-over, desperate eyes. Zuko squeezed his hand, and Suki took him into her mouth, practiced and sure.</p><p class="p1">“Good?” Zuko asked, and Sokka smiled, wide and crooked, leaning his head to the side.</p><p class="p1">“Awesome,” Sokka moaned, eyes roaming over Zuko’s face. “I think if I died right now —” he gasped at a pull of Suki’s mouth, “— I’d die happy.”</p><p class="p1">“Love you,” Zuko whispered, and he could barely hear it, but Sokka whispered it back, into Zuko’s thigh, eyes falling shut.</p><p class="p1">It was clear to Zuko that Suki knew exactly what she was doing with him; she knew that twisting motion that Sokka liked, she knew that same rhythm that had Sokka’s hips tilting up, and soon Sokka was groaning and spilling into Suki’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Fucking incredible,” Sokka sighed, and Suki smiled, wiping at the corner of her mouth.</p><p class="p1">Sokka leaned up, resting on his elbows, and Suki sat back. The three of them just looked at each other, silence heavy for a moment before Suki giggled, and then the tension broke like the surface of a pond. Sokka chuckled, and Zuko found a laugh bubbled up out of him unbidden.</p><p class="p1">“So, I was right,” Sokka said. “That was fun.” He leaned back, letting his head fall into Zuko’s lap again.</p><p class="p1">Suki got up off the bed, pushing back through the curtain to the drawing room, so Zuko followed her. She picked her clothes up off the floor, pulling them on.</p><p class="p1">“I had fun,” Suki said simply, and before she could say anything else Zuko grabbed her hand.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t go.”</p><p class="p1">Suki smiled. “It’s okay, I’ll let you guys be alone. I had a good time.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka was at the doorway. “Suki, please stay,” he asked, and she looked past Zuko back at Sokka.</p><p class="p1">She sighed. “Okay. But I have to leave early in the morning, I have the first shift.”</p><p class="p1">They curled up in bed together, Sokka and Suki on either side of Zuko — maybe he was imagining it, but it seemed like Suki picked that spot on purpose, to keep a little distance between herself and Sokka. Maybe it was just chance. Either way, Zuko was pleased beyond reason to be squeezed between the two of them, Suki’s head nestled against Zuko’s arm, Sokka’s breath soft on his ear.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Suki hadn’t been lying; when Sokka woke, she was gone, and there was only Zuko to tease and kiss. He worried that Suki had gotten spooked, that they’d flown too close to the sun, but then she was greeting him that afternoon with a smile, like nothing had happened at all.</p><p class="p1">The pieces fell together after that. It was like all the tension left Sokka, leaving just an easy camaraderie with Suki, lunch chats about her day, listening to her gush over Ty Lee, tumbling into bed with her and Zuko when she happened to be on guard during one of their romps. It was easy, and Zuko didn’t seem to harbor any jealousy, just adoring eyes for them.</p><p class="p1">Sokka felt like he had been tricked, or he had tricked someone, to be so lucky. It was perfect, getting to have Suki’s friendship, and her occasional kisses, and have Zuko loving him at the same time.</p><p class="p1">And yet, a nagging feeling remained. An ache. The trees turned flaming orange, then a deep red, and when Sokka could smell winter coming in the new chill breeze, he realized: home. He’d been so caught up in the planning and the kissing that he hadn’t noticed how much he missed the water, the twinkling snow, the smell of seal jerky in the smokehouse.</p><p class="p1">He bought it up when they were sprawled on the balcony, sun sinking into dusk, Sokka’s head resting against Zuko’s chest.</p><p class="p1">“I’ve been thinking,” Sokka started, nervous. He knew it would make Zuko upset, knowing Sokka had to leave. It upset Sokka too, but it was a fact that couldn’t be danced around.</p><p class="p1">“Mm, you’re always thinking, love,” Zuko said absently, turning a page of his book.</p><p class="p1">“The restoration back home is going well, from what my dad has said.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s good.”</p><p class="p1">“They’re breaking new ground on the next section of my plans.”</p><p class="p1">“Exciting.”</p><p class="p1">“So, I think I have to go back.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was silent, then marked his page and set the book to the side. He wrapped his arms around Sokka’s body.</p><p class="p1">“Okay. When you do you want to leave?”</p><p class="p1">“In a week or so, maybe? So I have enough time to get there before construction begins.”</p><p class="p1">“Alright, I think I can make that work. I’ll have to reschedule some meetings sooner, but most of it I’ll be able to do by messenger hawk.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka turned his head to look up at Zuko. “You want to come?”</p><p class="p1">“Well, yeah. Do you not want me to come?” Zuko’s brow tensed in worry.</p><p class="p1">“No no, I want you to come. That would be amazing.” Sokka pressed a kiss to Zuko’s arm, and Zuko squeezed him tighter. “I just thought, since you’re the Fire Lord —”</p><p class="p1">“I can take a break, just like you did for me. Besides, it’ll be nice to get away from the city for a while. The whispering is getting old.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.” Sokka paused. “Won’t coming with me just make it worse?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s lips pressed together. “Ugh, whatever, I don’t care. I’ll pass it off as a diplomatic mission, or something. Doesn’t matter. I’m coming with you.” His voice softened. “I couldn’t stand not being with you.”</p><p class="p1">“So it’s decided, then. We leave in a couple of weeks.”</p><p class="p1">“Good.” Zuko kissed the top of Sokka’s head, and Sokka’s chest went all squishy inside.</p><p class="p1">“I’m so excited for you to see the work we’ve done. It’s gonna be great. I’ve gotta write my dad and let him know we’re coming.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka sat up, and twisted to look at Zuko, who looked hesitant.</p><p class="p1">“Are you gonna tell him? About us?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka chewed on his bottom lip. “I think so. Well, not yet. This feels like something I should say in person.”</p><p class="p1">“Whatever you want,” Zuko said, and Sokka had to kiss him for that, sweet and soft.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you don't mind the Suzukka detour, I couldn't resist throwing a little of my OT3 in there. Rest assured, Zukka is still endgame, and Suki will soon be very happy with her acrobat gf. I may or may not write a TySuki spin off one-shot.</p><p>I want you guys to know that each comment gives me instant serotonin. I live for the validation.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Moonstruck</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>On their way to the Southern Water Tribe, Sokka consults an old friend and spends some alone time with Zuko.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>*DJ Khaled voice* anotha one</p><p>I arrive bearing fluff and filth.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">That taste of salt, the wind whipping color into Sokka’s cheeks… it was exhilarating to be at sea again. The small Water Tribe vessel was sleek and fast, even though it only fit seven passengers, including Sokka and Zuko. Zuko had initially suggested a royal vessel, but that left too much room for guards and attendants, in Sokka’s opinion, and he wanted to keep Zuko all to himself for a while. So Sokka had insisted on joining one of the merchant ships docked in the harbor; “to show trust and solidarity”, went the flimsy excuse. Nevermind that he picked one with a smaller, separate cabin that Sokka and Zuko could have all to themselves.</p><p class="p1">The sun was setting brilliantly behind the volcano behind them as they left, and soon the ship was surrounded only by rushing waves and the night sky. Sokka finally had a use for his warmer clothes again, wrapping himself in furs against the autumn sea air, enjoying the quiet rush alone on the deck.</p><p class="p1">He pulled his cloak tighter around him, taking his fill of the moon, cycling close to full now.</p><p class="p1">“It’s been a while since we’ve talked,” Sokka started, laying hands on the railing of the ship. “I hope everything’s going okay up there.” He paused, taking a breath. “I still think about you. You never told me what it was like, being a moon spirit. Did you make some spirit friends? Maybe there are some star spirits you can hang out with.”</p><p class="p1">It didn’t hurt as much anymore, to talk to Yue, but it still ached. Just a little.</p><p class="p1">“I haven’t been home in so long. I can’t wait to see what my dad got done while I was gone. I’m gonna make the South just as magnificent as the North, you’ll see. I have plans for a statue of you. I couldn’t decide whether to make it you as a person, or the fish. I went with the person. Maybe you would have preferred the fish version?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka knew she wouldn’t answer.</p><p class="p1">“I have Zuko with me this time. I’m nervous about him seeing my dad. They met at the Boiling Rock, but… I don’t know how my dad will feel about me dating him. Specifically. After what his country, his family has done. What do you think about it? Maybe you aren’t happy, either. The Fire Nation is the reason you had to sacrifice yourself in the first place.”</p><p class="p1">He sighed, looking down at the waves skidding past the side of the ship, dark, bottomless.</p><p class="p1">“It’s just, when I’m with him… I know he’s trying to undo what his people did. He’s doing what he can. Maybe that’s not enough. But, he helped me save my father. I don’t know how to feel about his ancestry.”</p><p class="p1">He looked back up at her, shining bright in a cloudless sky.</p><p class="p1">“I know how I feel about him, though. He’s so sweet, Yue. He writes me poems and listens to my ramblings about urban planning. He’s like a cactus, all prickly on the outside and sweet on the inside. When I’m with him I feel all squishy. I wanna make him smile. He doesn’t smile enough.” He sighed again. “I wish you could respond. I know you can’t, but. It would be nice to hear your opinion, sometimes.”</p><p class="p1">“Talking to yourself?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka turned to see Zuko, approaching from the door to the cabin. He came up behind Sokka, fitting his arms around Sokka’s waist, leaning up on his toes a little to rest his chin on Sokka’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Kind of,” Sokka said. “To her.” He gestured up at the moon.</p><p class="p1">“Oh.” Zuko looked up. “Hello, Yue. You look very pretty tonight.”</p><p class="p1">“She does.”</p><p class="p1">They were quiet for a moment, Zuko resting his head in the space between Sokka’s shoulder and neck. Sokka leaned his cheek against Zuko’s head, laying his hands on top of Zuko’s where they were clasped over his abdomen.</p><p class="p1">“It’s good to get away,” Zuko said softly. “I feel better already.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. I missed sailing.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, me too. More than I thought I would. All those years wandering, I hated it, that I couldn’t go home. The sea was a reminder that my father didn’t want me. But those years made me who I am, so. I guess I should thank the sea.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka turned, pulling Zuko close, wrapping his arms around Zuko’s shoulders and neck.</p><p class="p1">“I’m excited to see the new construction,” Zuko said, pulling back so he could meet Sokka’s eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Me, too. And I can treat you to some real, authentic Water Tribe cuisine.”</p><p class="p1">“Sounds delicious.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s hair was whipping around in the breeze, so Sokka tucked the loose strands behind Zuko’s ears, holding them back with his hands cupped around Zuko’s face. His soft brown eyes looked almost black in the dim night, with only the moon and starlight to see by. It was just cold enough that their breath came out in little cloudy puffs, misting between them. Zuko’s lips parted, but he just held Sokka’s waist closely, eyes roaming over Sokka’s face.</p><p class="p1">“Why are you so handsome?” Zuko asked.</p><p class="p1">“Shush. I’m not so handsome.”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, you are. You’re gorgeous for no goddamn reason. It’s ridiculous.” Zuko’s cheek leaned into one of Sokka’s hands.</p><p class="p1">“You’ve gone soft on me, your sparkiness.”</p><p class="p1">“How could I not? With cheekbones like that.” He leaned up and pressed a kiss there, just next to Sokka’s eye.</p><p class="p1">“Duckie,” Sokka murmured.</p><p class="p1">“I love when you call me that.” Zuko’s lips were just over Sokka’s now, and he could feel the brush of Zuko’s lips as he talked. “You’re so sweet to me. Can’t believe you picked me, to be sweet to.”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know if you knew this, but you’re special,” Sokka whispered, sinking into a kiss, dragging a sigh out of Zuko. “I love you, even though you can’t seem to wake up to why.”</p><p class="p1">Pressed together, they had a little cocoon of warmth against the chilly breeze, Zuko’s breath toasty hot on Sokka’s cheeks.</p><p class="p1">“You’re so warm,” Sokka said, slipping his hands under Zuko’s cloak to burrow around his waist. “My little hotpot.”</p><p class="p1">“I <em>feel</em> freezing,” Zuko half-laughed, hunching his shoulders and tucking his chin to Sokka’s chest.</p><p class="p1">“Can’t you keep yourself warm? With that fire-breath thing?”</p><p class="p1">“I’d rather be warmed up by you.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, let’s go to bed, then. I’ll keep you cozy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka took Zuko’s hand, leading him to the cabin door, giving Yue one last look before he entered.</p><p class="p1">Their compartment was miniscule, a tiny box with a bed built into the side of the ship, just enough space for their bags and a hammock — Sokka’s “official” bed, but the hammock wouldn’t be getting any use on their journey.</p><p class="p1">They changed into sleepclothes, Zuko shivering as he did. He’d packed the only kind he had, thin breathable silk perfect for balmy Fire Nation nights, but almost useless as they moved further South and deeper into winter.</p><p class="p1">“We’ll get you something warmer when we get there,” Sokka said. “You’ll have to make do with me, for now.”</p><p class="p1">He shook out a set of sleeping furs, along with a thick blanket woven from buffalo-yak wool. It had a traditional Southern pattern, of brightly-colored interlocking diamonds. Zuko curled around Sokka’s side.</p><p class="p1">“I think you’ll be sufficient,” Zuko murmured, smiling.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah,” and then Zuko was kissing him, sinking his fingers into Sokka’s loose hair.</p><p class="p1">“Mmph, I like where you’re going with this, but let’s get in bed. I’m cold.”</p><p class="p1">The furs were thick and soft, and the woolen blanket on top provided a welcome additional layer of insulation. Sokka’s feet brushed Zuko’s icy toes, and Zuko shuffled closer.</p><p class="p1">“Your feet are cold,” Sokka grumbled, kissing Zuko, a soft brush of his lips.</p><p class="p1">“I told you, it’s freezing.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s not even that cold yet.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I’ve been to the South.”</p><p class="p1">“I remember.” Sokka pulled back, and Zuko’s face fell.</p><p class="p1">“I’m sorry.” Zuko pulled his hand back from where it was wrapped around Sokka’s neck. “I never should have threatened your tribe. I was just like the rest of them.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s —” Sokka stopped, and sighed. <em>It’s not okay.</em> “Thank you for saying that. For apologizing.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s the least I can do. I hate that I was ever that person.”</p><p class="p1">“You were just a boy, then.”</p><p class="p1">“I believed what my father had told me. I was foolish, and hateful.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka remembered. He remembered the look on Zuko’s face, all those years ago, when he strode down the lowered prow of his battleship. It was hard to believe that the man in bed with him was the same person.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s mouth twisted, and he reached out, fingertips brushing over Sokka’s cheek.</p><p class="p1">“I’m so sorry that I ever had any part in what happened to your tribe.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s throat felt tight, but he swallowed around it. “I was the only man there… I felt so small and helpless.”</p><p class="p1">“You were just a boy, then, too.”</p><p class="p1">“My Gran-Gran told me so many stories, you know. How big and beautiful the buildings were, as big as the North. Our own style of bending, thriving. The festivals. How many towns there were, all along the coasts. All vanished.” He tried to keep it in, but a tear leaked out, and Zuko brushed it away with a swipe of his thumb.</p><p class="p1">“I’m so sorry.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled Zuko in tight, hiding his face in Zuko’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“I have to bring it all back. I have to.”</p><p class="p1">“I know you can do it. If anyone can, it’s you. And I’m gonna do everything I can to make sure that happens,” Zuko said into Sokka’s hair.</p><p class="p1">“Thanks.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko kissed Sokka’s cheek.</p><p class="p1">“Of course, love.”</p><p class="p1">Their body heat had warmed up the inside of the furs, soft and cozy. Zuko’s feet weren’t cold anymore when they brushed against Sokka’s ankle, thankfully. Sokka felt the long day, busy with packing and loading and casting off, drag his eyelids low.</p><p class="p1">“Love you,” Sokka mumbled, half-asleep, nuzzling into Zuko. It was like he had a boiler in his belly, the way the heat rolled off him. Zuko slipped an arm around Sokka’s shoulders and hummed, a sound Sokka mostly felt vibrate through Zuko’s chest, rather than heard. He fell asleep to the soft pattern of Zuko rubbing small circles on his back.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko half-woke to the feeling of Sokka shifting next to him, squirming under the covers. Sokka was twisting, then tossing the furs half off of himself, and Zuko felt the cold rush of the night air. The cabin had abysmal insulation.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” he grumbled, tugging the furs back over them. “’S cold.”</p><p class="p1">“Mmm?” Sokka was half-asleep, too, legs tangled between Zuko’s. “You’re too hot.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m cold,” Zuko whined, tucking the furs tight up to his chin. The cold had shocked him awake.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, ’s too hot,” Sokka croaked, sitting up, pulling off his sleepshirt, made of a plush thick weave perfect for retaining heat — when you didn’t have a firebender to produce it.</p><p class="p1">Zuko reached his hand out from under the safe bubble of heat to grab Sokka close, fingers meeting hot skin. Sokka slid half-under the furs again, leaving a leg out.</p><p class="p1">“Sorry I woke you up,” Sokka said, voice gravelly with sleep. “You’re just so toasty. Like a fucking bonfire.”</p><p class="p1">“I forgive you,” Zuko rasped, running his palm over Sokka’s back. <em>He’s the toasty one. I don’t know how he isn’t absolutely freezing.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka met Zuko’s mouth with a lazy kiss, groggy and languid. Sokka’s tongue found its way into Zuko’s mouth, but he didn’t seem to really mean it, pulling away and settling his head back on the bed to fall asleep again.</p><p class="p1">Even though most of Zuko just wanted to go back to sleep, that kiss had struck a little match, so he tested the waters. He took advantage of Sokka’s lack of shirt, pressing his chest into Sokka’s, fingertips tracing over Sokka’s ribs and down his side. Sokka sighed, eyelids cracking open again, then fluttering shut. Zuko kept running his fingers up and down, letting his fingernails drag across the skin, and Sokka made a little happy noise, opening his eyes to catch Zuko’s in the dark room. Zuko could barely see the few inches in front of his face, but he could discern the rough shapes of Sokka’s face and the flicker of his eyes opening.</p><p class="p1">Sokka didn’t say anything, so Zuko continued, flattening his palm on Sokka’s side, massaging a muscle there, thumb rubbing. Sokka closed the short distance between them, starting up another lazy kiss, with a little more purpose this time. A small noise snuck its way out of Zuko when he felt Sokka’s tongue on his, Sokka breathing hot into his mouth, and the little match that had been lit started growing.</p><p class="p1">“Baby,” Sokka breathed, “It’s the middle of the night.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you want to go back to sleep?” Sokka had broken the kiss to mouth at Zuko’s jaw.</p><p class="p1">“No.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hands slipped under Zuko’s thin shirt, a soft touch that made Zuko’s skin light up with goosebumps that had nothing to do with the cold air. His mouth moved to lave and suck at Zuko’s neck, and Zuko tangled his fingers in Sokka’s hair, groaning. When Sokka sank his teeth in, Zuko hissed, but clutched Sokka’s head close, body flexing. His gut twisted, the pain mixing with the sweet feeling of Sokka licking over the bruise, in a messy, delicious way that had whimpers brewing in Zuko’s chest already.</p><p class="p1">“Good?” Sokka asked, mouth still moving over Zuko’s clavicle, to the spot at the base of Zuko’s throat.</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm,” Zuko responded, swallowing. He wanted more of whatever that was.</p><p class="p1">Sokka moaned, sucking and biting at that new spot on Zuko’s neck. <em>He’s definitely leaving a mark,</em> Zuko thought, at the back of his mind, but there was no way he was going to make Sokka stop. They were going to the South Pole, he could just wear a fucking scarf.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hips pressed into Zuko’s, and with their legs slotted together Zuko could feel the length of him, half-hard. He still had his mouth attached to Zuko’s neck, teeth biting and grazing, tongue swiping over his handiwork. Zuko couldn’t do anything but buck back against Sokka and try not to whine, curling his fingers in Sokka’s hair.</p><p class="p1">“Baby,” Sokka rasped, giving Zuko’s neck a break to kiss at the tender skin just below Zuko’s ear. “Those little sounds you make… Wanna hear ‘em.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka kissed at Zuko’s throat, just under the ridge of his jaw, and Zuko moaned, his hands moving to the back of Sokka’s neck.</p><p class="p1">“They’re kind of embarrassing,” Zuko whispered. He thought he sounded a bit silly, a bit overdramatic, a bit… unmasculine, especially when Sokka got him to make noises high in his throat.</p><p class="p1">“Mm, don’t say that. I fucking love them,” he said, sucking another mark into Zuko’s throat, nipping, “they get me so hard, baby. Fucking amazing.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s words were making Zuko’s breathing pick up, and Sokka asked for it, so Zuko let out the whine waiting in his chest.</p><p class="p1">“Ah, yeah,” Sokka breathed. “Stars, you’re so hot.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, I am a firebender,” Zuko panted, hands gripping Sokka’s bicep, side, hip, ass, anything he could find in the dark.</p><p class="p1">“You always make that joke,” Sokka mumbled, mouth moving to the muscle between Zuko’s neck and shoulder. Zuko rutted into Sokka, letting a whimper drift out of him, a quiet, choked noise that made Sokka sink his teeth in again.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, please,” Zuko gasped, pulling Sokka’s hips as close as he could — not that they could get any closer.</p><p class="p1">“Please what?” Sokka said, finally leaving Zuko’s neck and hovering in front of Zuko’s face. “I wanna hear exactly what you want.”</p><p class="p1">“Hnh, I don’t know,” he moaned, “Want you to fuck me, but we don’t have anything with us, anywhere to wash up…”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sure you’ll think of something, if you just put your mind to it,” Sokka teased, ghosting his lips across Zuko’s cheek.</p><p class="p1">“You’re the idea guy.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m leaving this one up to you, baby.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka waited, palming gently at Zuko’s groin, a teasing touch. Zuko squirmed.</p><p class="p1">“Go down on me?” Zuko asked, hushed, and he could just barely see Sokka’s grin curl at his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Sounds like a great idea.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka slid down, pulling at the waist of Zuko’s pants, tugging them off and tossing them unceremoniously over the edge of the cramped bed.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck, ’s cold,” Zuko complained, suddenly bereft of any covers.</p><p class="p1">Sokka rearranged the furs, getting them bunched around Zuko’s torso, draping the woolen blanket across his own shoulders as he bent between Zuko’s legs.</p><p class="p1">“Better?” Sokka asked, mouth already on Zuko’s stomach.</p><p class="p1">“A little.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, I’ll warm you up in a second.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka took his sweet time moving over Zuko’s stomach, implementing more of that sucking and biting that made Zuko want to squirm both away from and towards Sokka at the same time. He remembered what Sokka said about noises, and let himself give a few gasps, a moan or two that earned another nip from Sokka.</p><p class="p1">He moved over Zuko’s hip, down to his inner thigh, licking and grazing his teeth the whole way. Zuko’s hips tilted up, hoping for some real action, but Sokka was in a teasing mood, inching closer as slow as he could. Finally, finally, he mouthed at Zuko’s length, indulged in a long lick up the side. Zuko swore, and Sokka chuckled, open-mouthed. He moved further down, tongue on Zuko’s balls, a treat that Zuko never really asked for but loved to be surprised with.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, Sokka, <em>that</em>,” Zuko panted, and Sokka responded by paying more attention there, slow and soft.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hands moved to cup under Zuko’s thighs, gently pushing them up, hitching them over Sokka’s shoulders. Zuko moaned, sinking his fingers into the furs. It was slow, delicious, not quite enough yet, the kind of teasing that would have him seeing stars later —</p><p class="p1">He felt Sokka’s tongue drift lower, lower, prop his thighs further back, and then Zuko was gasping at the feeling of Sokka’s tongue touching that rim. Sure, he’d had Sokka’s fingers there many times before, but there was something foreign about his soft wet tongue that made Zuko’s legs want to shake.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, Sokka, oh my — fuck, Sokka,” Zuko babbled, and Sokka pressed a kiss there — a fucking <em>kiss</em> — and laughed, low in his chest.</p><p class="p1">“Do you like it?” Sokka asked, the tone of his voice making it quite clear that he knew exactly how much Zuko liked it.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Yes</em>, it’s — please keep going, please —”</p><p class="p1">Sokka continued, and Zuko couldn’t help the noises he made after that. It wasn’t his fault, it was Sokka’s, the way his slick tongue moved, the brush of his lips, how <em>dirty </em>it felt to have his knees propped up, wide apart. It drew high, choked whines out of him, a strangled whimper when Sokka gave him a long lick with the flat of his tongue, the most embarrassing gasp he’d ever heard himself make when Sokka pushed his tongue in, just barely. Zuko wrapped his hand around himself, desperate, stroking quickly.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled back just enough to moan and say, “That’s it, baby. Fucking come for me, just like that,” and then dove back in, more determined than before, dragging a long whimper out of Zuko that made him want to hide in embarrassment, but had Sokka letting out a soft moan in response.</p><p class="p1">His hips could barely move, with his legs bent back like they were, so when he came Zuko’s legs just tensed and trembled, and to his surprise he gasped out a small puff of fire. He shut his eyes against the glow of the flame and spilled onto his stomach — right onto his shirt. Zuko hadn’t realized he still had it on until it was already soiled.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled away, finally, giving Zuko merciful relief, and climbed back up to lay alongside him.</p><p class="p1">“I ruined my shirt,” Zuko said, breath still coming in short gasps.</p><p class="p1">“Hm, so you did,” Sokka sighed, touching a finger to the stain and then putting it in his mouth.</p><p class="p1">Zuko groaned, letting his head fall back against the furs.</p><p class="p1">“We can wash it later,” Sokka said, helping Zuko tug the shirt off and toss it on the floor, along with Zuko’s pants.</p><p class="p1">“Mmm, okay.”</p><p class="p1">“Did I see you breathe fire?” Sokka asked, grinning and kissing him.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, it just… came out.”</p><p class="p1">“Along with some other stuff.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, quit it.” Zuko smiled despite himself. “Hey, it’s not fair that I’m naked and you’re not.” Zuko tucked his fingers under the waist of Sokka’s trousers.</p><p class="p1">“You have a point.” Sokka shimmied out of them, and then Zuko could get his hands all over him, the soft skin and wiry muscle and the dustings of hair on his chest and stomach. Sokka was hard against Zuko’s leg, and when Zuko gave him a light squeeze Sokka groaned and grabbed at Zuko’s waist.</p><p class="p1">As much as Zuko adored the way Sokka talked and teased and joked in bed, Zuko had never been very confident returning it. Sure, he swore and begged and moaned, but Sokka had a way with words that Zuko just… didn’t think he could pull off. <em>What if I sound stupid? What if it ruins the mood for him?</em> He was sure if that happened he’d want to curl up and die. But then again, what if Sokka wanted that, and had just never asked for it? Zuko had trouble asking for things, and he hated to think that there were things that Sokka wanted that he wasn’t giving him.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko asked, hushed and quiet, so close to Sokka’s face he could feel Sokka’s hot breath. “Do you like the uhm — dirty talk? When we’re together? I just, I love it, and you said you wanted to hear me more… Do you want me to, uhm, say stuff too?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko still had a hand wrapped around Sokka, and Sokka’s hips were rolling into it in tiny, slow thrusts.</p><p class="p1">“Mmm. If you want to.” Sokka’s hands gripped Zuko’s sides. “I love how you react to it. You get so, hnh, worked up…” he trailed off, and Zuko gave him long, slow strokes. “I think it’d be hot, yeah. You’re so quiet usually… it’s a fucking crime.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko swallowed. “I… feel like I’m gonna say something stupid.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka shifted, hips still restless. “Don’t worry about that. Just start with… mmm, start with telling me about, ah, what you like.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay.” He moved closer, lips almost touching Sokka’s. “I loved what you just did, with your mouth.”</p><p class="p1">He could feel Sokka’s smile. “I’m glad you, unh, fuck — I’m glad you liked it.”</p><p class="p1">“It felt — it was like your fingers, but softer. Felt so good.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka moaned, “Keep talking, baby. What else do you like? My fingers?”</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm, you’re so good with them. I think about it all the time.”</p><p class="p1">“When do you think about it?” Sokka’s hips were moving more insistently, so Zuko picked up his pace.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, when I really shouldn’t be. When I see you working with your hands.”</p><p class="p1">“Ha, really? Naughty.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was hitting his stride. “I think about it during meetings. In the throne room. Especially when you’re there. Think about you opening me up, getting me to make those sounds you like so much, the fucking moaning and shit.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka clutched at Zuko’s arm. “Stars, you do? That’s so fucking — oh, <em>fuck</em> that’s hot. Spirits, shit.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka had tucked his head between Zuko’s and the furs, and Zuko could just feel the movement of Sokka’s lips on his cheek, and Sokka was coming apart, because of <em>his</em> words, <em>he </em>did that — it made Zuko’s gut twist in delight. He was starting to understand why Sokka talked so much.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, when you’re sitting there, right next to me? Think about you bending me over the table. Making me say your name for you. I think about you, ah, making me get on my knees and take your cock in my mouth, think about being so good for you —”</p><p class="p1">“Ah, baby, I want that. Please, need your mouth.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, yeah,” Zuko panted, scrambling down, and Sokka turned onto his back, chest heaving.</p><p class="p1">Zuko wasted no time, taking the head in and sucking lightly, and then there was the familiar feeling of Sokka’ fingers in his hair, playing with it in light little tugs. Zuko pulled off for a beat.</p><p class="p1">“Pull my hair,” Zuko said, and Sokka moaned <em>yeah</em>, and then Zuko wrapped his lips around Sokka again.</p><p class="p1">Sokka tugged experimentally, a little harder, right at the roots. The dull ache of the pull was lovely, and Zuko sank lower, wanting <em>more, more,</em> and Sokka started talking.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko,” he sighed, “that’s so good. Your tongue…” Zuko swiped his tongue around him and Sokka’s breath hitched. “Yeah, like that. <em>Spirits</em>, I don’t know how you’re so good at that —” He punctuated it with another tug at Zuko’s hair, and Zuko groaned. “You like that? Want more?” Zuko nodded, and Sokka pulled harder, wringing another groan out of Zuko. “Ah, I didn’t know you wanted that… want me to be a little rougher with you, huh? Does that sound good?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko pulled off for a breathless moment. His heart was slamming against his sternum at the thought of it.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, sounds so good,” Zuko growled, and then sank back down onto Sokka, working his mouth further down.</p><p class="p1">“You naughty, naughty Fire Lord,” Sokka moaned, hips jumping up and thrusting himself further than Zuko was strictly prepared for, but it was a welcome surprise, and Zuko grabbed Sokka’s hips, clutching them close. “Thinking about me in your meetings… does it get you hard? I bet you can’t even pay attention, sitting there with a hard-on in your royal robes.” Zuko could only give a muffled moan in response. “Your ministers have no idea how dirty you are, if they could see you now… begging me to pull your hair…”</p><p class="p1">Zuko sank lower, and Sokka bumped the back of his throat, and that along with the yank of Sokka’s hand in his hair had Zuko’s eyes rolling back into his head. He didn’t know <em>what </em>had come over him, just that he loved the way Sokka gasped, how frantically Sokka was pulling at his hair, nails running over Zuko’s scalp, how filthy Sokka’s words had gotten. Sokka’s hips bucked up, and he slid just barely further down Zuko’s throat, shocking him into gagging and pulling back.</p><p class="p1">Zuko pulled off, coughing, and Sokka’s firm grip on Zuko’s hair turned to soft petting.</p><p class="p1">“Aw fuck, I’m sorry,” Sokka said. “I’m sorry, I won’t —”</p><p class="p1">“It’s alright,” Zuko said, clearing his throat. “Just, go a little slower.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay, baby. Still want me to pull your hair?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah,” Zuko breathed, and sank his mouth back down.</p><p class="p1">After that, Sokka was careful to let Zuko set his own pace as he took Sokka deeper. Zuko was intrigued, wanted to find out what his limit was, so he moved steadily — until Sokka was brushing the back of his throat again, and Sokka had both hands in Zuko’s long hair, pulling and tugging, moaning with each curl of Zuko’s tongue.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko… fucking incredible… whatever you want, I’ll do whatever you want. Ah, fuck. That’s —”</p><p class="p1">With a slight change of angle, Zuko managed to get Sokka to slip down his throat, just a little — Zuko didn’t want to gag too hard again. Sokka groaned, and with Zuko’s hands on Sokka’s hips he could feel the muscles there strain against the urge to tilt up. Sokka encouraged him with a pull at the back of his head, and Zuko didn’t have the same knee-jerk reaction as he did before, so he tried a little more, a little more, and then he couldn’t breathe but had his nose buried in the crop of hair at the base of Sokka’s length. He pulled back, enough to be able to breathe through his nose again, and the high whine that came out of Sokka made Zuko’s skin sing.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Zuko</em>, holy shit. Fuck, fuck, fuck, that’s — I can’t believe you,” Sokka babbled, so Zuko did it again, and again, and listened to the beautiful sounds coming from Sokka in a stream of consciousness. Sokka barely held back a few stuttering thrusts, but Zuko had gotten into the rhythm of it, and relished knowing that Sokka was unable to control himself.</p><p class="p1">He had to pull back and take him shallower every so often, to be able to breathe, but that didn’t stop Sokka from yanking at Zuko’s hair all the same. Zuko lost track of how long he stayed down there, focusing on using his mouth and tongue and throat to wring every sweet moan out of his boyfriend that he could.</p><p class="p1">“Baby, baby you’re — I’m so close — right there —” Sokka choked out, so Zuko took him as deep as he could manage, and Sokka moaned through it, struggling to stay still. Zuko only noticed he was done when Sokka relaxed, limbs finally going limp. He sat back on his heels and wiped at the saliva running out of the side of his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Spirits, Zuko. Fuck,” Sokka groaned, and Zuko wriggled under the furs again, tucking himself close to Sokka’s side.</p><p class="p1">“You liked it?” Zuko asked.</p><p class="p1">“Holy shit, I loved it. You’re fucking crazy.” He hauled Zuko in for a quick, messy kiss.</p><p class="p1">“You know, I didn’t taste a thing. When you finished,” Zuko noted.</p><p class="p1">“Really?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka wrapped the furs and blanket tight around them. With both of them spent, the air felt biting cold again, and now Sokka didn’t have the advantage of thick sleepclothes.</p><p class="p1">“I’m glad you liked it,” Zuko whispered, tracing a circle on Sokka’s shoulder with his finger.</p><p class="p1">“Huh, you liked it too, though, right? Wasn’t just for me?” Sokka’s voice was already slurring with sleep.</p><p class="p1">“No, I enjoyed it, too. Wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t.”</p><p class="p1">“Good.” Sokka yawned. “Sleep-time now. You’ve exhausted me.” He gave Zuko a soft kiss.</p><p class="p1">Zuko fell asleep with the furs tucked close around them, Sokka’s arm laid across his side, with warm toes and cold cheeks.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you guys don't mind more spicy content, I wanted to write them getting more comfortable with each other and exploring the kinds of things they like. </p><p>Also, one of the things I dislike in other Zukka fics is when Zuko's history with the SWT is just... ignored? So I feel it's important to their story to incorporate Sokka feeling conflicted about that. However, I am not native, so if you're native and you have any feedback or critiques regarding how I've portrayed it, I'd love to hear it so I can be more faithful to Sokka's character.</p><p>Next chapter will be in the Southern Water Tribe!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Southern Water Tribe Holiday</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka gets to see the fruits of his labor, and Zuko enjoys a little time off.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>WARNING: cuddling and kissing ahead</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka cast an arm out to the plaza, turning to Zuko, unable to keep the grin from spreading on his face. “Didn’t my dad do such a good job — Zuko, you’re shivering.”</p><p class="p1">He had the thick, borrowed coat tugged tight around his face, and his teeth were chattering.</p><p class="p1">“I’m fine, Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka frowned. It wouldn’t do to have an icicle for a boyfriend. “I can get you a scarf, you know.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s okay, I can keep myself warm.” He let out a tiny puff of fire, and it <em>did</em> seem to help, so Sokka let it go.</p><p class="p1">“This is where I hope merchants will come set up,” Sokka said, pointing. “I can’t wait. There’s gonna be food stalls and crafts, and — and everything! And the sculpture looks so good! Dad, this is incredible.” The icy otter penguin statue gleamed, proud in the sunlight.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda chuckled. “The waterbenders did all the work. I just followed your directions, son.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka threw another hug around his dad; he couldn’t stop, now that he was within hugging distance.</p><p class="p1">“Do you wanna see the new port? We’re working on the docks right now,” Hakoda rumbled, with Sokka’s face pressed into his thick coat.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, let’s go.” Sokka rolled up his plans and almost grabbed Zuko’s hand — but that’s not quite where they’re at right then.</p><p class="p1">Nothing’s <em>wrong</em>, per se, but in the tumult of arriving and unpacking and jumping onto Hakoda to give him the biggest polar bear-dog hug that Sokka could muster, and with the grand tour, Sokka hadn’t had a chance to say anything to his dad about the real reason Zuko tagged along. Sokka hadn’t let slip yet that he’d needed to pack Zuko’s kisses along with his coats and long underwear.</p><p class="p1">There were two pairs of waterbenders working, methodically pulling up slabs of ice out of the arctic waters, crafting frozen hooks for ships to lash to.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, this looks fantastic,” Sokka gushed, “Just like on the plans!” He leaned over to show Zuko the unfurled scroll, pointing to the little dock diagram.</p><p class="p1">“This is incredible, Sokka,” Zuko said, and Sokka wanted to kiss those cheeks, all pink with cold, but he can’t, not yet. <em>Soon, I’ll tell my dad as soon as possible.</em></p><p class="p1">Hakoda had a few more sites for them to visit. The new main hall was in the first stages of construction, as well, a great hulking mass of ice that would one day hold banquets and festivals and performances — just like the hall in the north. <em>No, better than the north! We’ll be even better. </em>Sokka stared up at the unfinished arches that loomed high, casting new shadows down onto the plaza.</p><p class="p1">“It’s not finished,” Sokka explained to Zuko, gesturing to his schematic. “These are just the bare bones, of course, and then there’ll be a wrap-around balcony up there, I’ve got all these details for the spires — hold on —” He flipped through his sheaves of paper, looking for the right detail. “Ah, here. The spires.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko peered down at the diagram. “Oh, those look gorgeous. I can’t wait to see them, Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">It was all Sokka could do to keep from smooching him, with the way Zuko was smiling encouragingly at Sokka, eyes sparkling in the bright arctic sun. He had a snowflake or two caught in his eyelashes. <em>Just wanna reach out and brush them off</em>, Sokka thought, and then Zuko smiled wider and Sokka felt his cheeks flush. He ducked his head and turned back to the unfinished hall, struggling to keep the corners of his mouth from spreading into a grin.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda chimed in, “Right now we’re working on the foundation, mostly.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sure it will be a sight to behold once it’s finished, Chief Hakoda,” Zuko said, and Hakoda nodded his head slightly.</p><p class="p1">“Thank you, Your Highness.” Hakoda held his hands stiffly behind his back.</p><p class="p1">Sokka would have to work on that, he thinks, <em>Dad’s being so formal. He’s Zuko, not a stranger —</em> but then again, he kind of <em>was</em> a stranger, after so many years spent growing into a new crown. Zuko wasn’t the teenager who broke Hakoda out of that prison anymore.</p><p class="p1">They started their walk back towards the cottages and houses, a gathering of dwellings that was expanding by the week. As they drew closer, Sokka could hear the peals of children’s laughter, and could smell the plumes of cookfire smoke trailing into the sky. <em>Home. </em>Zuko stuck close to Sokka’s side, and the pair fell back a bit from Hakoda — <em>Dad’s always been a fast walker.</em> Sokka could remember having to trot along next to him to keep up, following his father around all day.</p><p class="p1">“I’m so happy for you,” Zuko said softly, and Sokka turned to give him a small smile.</p><p class="p1">“Thanks. It’s exciting to see everything coming together.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s cottage was smaller, but he’d insisted on playing host to the Fire Lord while Zuko stayed, so they wended their way through the houses toward the east end, the newer end.</p><p class="p1">“I don’t think people here like me very much,” Zuko said, hushed, a hand touching Sokka’s elbow.</p><p class="p1">“Hm?” Sokka stopped walking, turning to face Zuko. His boyfriend had his hood up, face sinking into the plush fur lining. Zuko pulled at the edge of it, pulling it past his scar. His mouth twisted.</p><p class="p1">“I think — it’s doesn’t matter. It’s not a big deal,” Zuko said, breath clouding in front of his face.</p><p class="p1">“No, what is it?”</p><p class="p1">“Some people were… glaring at me, I think. I mean, I get it.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko looked at the ground. They were tucked between two houses, out of the way of the movement of the townspeople, so Sokka took Zuko’s hands in his.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, it’s fine. I’m not — they’re right to hate me. And my nation.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka wasn’t sure what to say, so he just gripped Zuko’s hands tighter.</p><p class="p1">“I’m gonna make it right. I promise you. I’m gonna earn their trust.” Zuko squeezed Sokka’s hands back. “I’ll do everything I can.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka just nodded. Zuko glanced behind Sokka, then turned to look behind himself, and leaned forward.</p><p class="p1">“Can I kiss you?” he whispered.</p><p class="p1">That brought a smile back to Sokka’s face. “Yeah, just a little one.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s lips were icy on Sokka’s, even through the numbness. <em>I’ll have to warm them up later.</em></p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“You gotta make sure you add the dried kelp once the sea prunes start getting a little wrinkly. If you add the dried kelp too soon, it gets soggy, and then it’s no good. Then you add the seal blubber…” Sokka explained, stirring the pot of stewing sea prunes.</p><p class="p1">Zuko smiled, nodding. He was paying rapt attention — he had to. He was dead set on learning how to cook those sea prunes so he could surprise Sokka with them one day. Zuko crowded closer to the pot, hovering at Sokka’s back. The pot was suspended over a fire, flickering in the center of the room, and kept the main room of the house nice and cozy, which Zuko was endlessly thankful for. At least inside, he wasn’t afraid his toes were going to fall off.</p><p class="p1">Zuko wasn’t going to lie, the sea prunes smelled pretty interesting. When Katara had made them for the whole group, they’d tasted like the bottom of the ocean, but Sokka was so excited for Zuko to try <em>his</em> recipe that Zuko was willing to give them another shot.</p><p class="p1">“Now we have to wait a while, for it to cook down,” Sokka said, tapping off his spoon and laying it to the side. Sokka turned to face Zuko and wrapped his arms around Zuko’s waist. “They’ll be done soon.”</p><p class="p1">“Good, ‘cause I’m starving,” Zuko said, giving him a quick kiss. Sokka looked so good in the firelight, all warm and glowy, eyes catching the flames.</p><p class="p1"><em>I’m a fucking goner</em>, Zuko thought, stopping to take it in for a moment. He was warm, and Sokka had his arms around him, and he didn’t have anything to do the next morning but keep loving Sokka. No one was guarding the door; no one needed to. His hair was loose and Sokka was kissing his cheek and he felt so happy he could cry.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled back, tugging Zuko’s hand along with him as he sat on one of the floor cushions. Zuko plopped down, too, crossing his legs, wiggling his toes inside of the thick socks Sokka had lent him.</p><p class="p1">“I love you,” Zuko said, twisting his fingers between Sokka’s.</p><p class="p1">“Mmhmm. I love you, too.”</p><p class="p1">“Like, a lot.”</p><p class="p1">“I know.”</p><p class="p1">“Do you really, though?” Zuko looked at Sokka skeptically, and Sokka was rolling his eyes and grinning. “Sometimes, I feel like I don’t tell you enough.” Zuko wasn’t sure there was a <em>way</em> to communicate it, the way he felt.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it. You tell me plenty.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m not <em>pretty</em>, I’m handsome,” Zuko grumbled.</p><p class="p1">“You’re very pretty, sparky. It’s a good thing.” Sokka leaned over, supporting himself on both hands. “It’s why I give you so many kisses.” He made his point with a peck on Zuko’s cheek.</p><p class="p1">“Are you saying you’re only with me for my looks?” Zuko teased, lying down with his head in Sokka’s lap. He knew that every time he put his head there, Sokka would start running his fingers through Zuko’s hair, and this time was no different.</p><p class="p1">“No, I <em>kiss</em> you because you’re pretty. I’m <em>with</em> you for the status boost. There’s a lot of perks to being the royal slam piece.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re not a slam piece, though, you’re my boyfriend.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I’m just teasing.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko studied Sokka’s face for a moment. “You’re not… you don’t think of yourself as a… ‘slam piece’, right? I know we haven’t been public yet, and I really don’t want you to think —”</p><p class="p1">Sokka cut him off. “Duckie, I know, I know. We’ve talked about this.” He scratched Zuko’s scalp, just behind his ears. “I’m okay with it. We told our friends, and that’s all I really give a shit about. Well, them and my dad.” He sighed. “To be honest, I’m a little nervous.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko nuzzled his head into Sokka’s hand. “He won’t care. He loves you so much.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s what’s weird, is that I <em>know </em>that. I don’t know why I’m nervous.”</p><p class="p1">“Is it because of me?” The glares from the townspeople were still so fresh in his mind.</p><p class="p1">“Maybe. I’m not sure… a little. But he didn’t seem to resent you when you helped me break him out of prison, and you guys have talked a bit. He came to the anniversary, what, three years ago?”</p><p class="p1">“I think it was two.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Maybe I’m just overthinking everything.”</p><p class="p1">“But that’s one of your best qualities.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka smiled and brushed a thumb over Zuko’s forehead. He peered over at the sea prunes.</p><p class="p1">“They’re almost ready,” Sokka said, giving them a stir.</p><p class="p1">“I’ll get the bowls.” Zuko got up to pull a pair of wooden bowls and two spoons down from the shelves at the side of the room. Sokka spent a few more moments studying the bubbling pot, and then deemed the prunes ready to scoop into the bowls.</p><p class="p1">“Okay, give me your honest opinion. Don’t sugarcoat it just because I give you head.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka,” Zuko scolded. “You really think I would lie to you.”</p><p class="p1">“Absolutely yes.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko scooped up a bit of broth and a chunk of sea prune and sniffed experimentally. Sokka was expectant, so Zuko took the bite. It was richer than he remembered, a little saltier. The sea prunes were just as chewy. Not altogether unpleasant, but very different from the spicy grilled meats Zuko was used to.</p><p class="p1">“So? What do you think?”</p><p class="p1">“It’s good. The seaweed addition really made a difference.”</p><p class="p1">“I told you. Suck it, Katara.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka tucked in with a gusto that Zuko couldn’t quite muster, at least not yet. Zuko suspected the sea prunes were a bit of an acquired taste; it was the texture that he was gonna have to get used to. <em>Not the worst thing to have to get used to, having my boyfriend cook for me. I’ve suffered much worse.</em></p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka couldn’t resist, when Zuko was bent over pulling his borrowed sleepclothes on, so he gave him a playful swat on the seat of his pants. Or rather, lack of pants. Zuko made an indignant noise, pulling the pants on and straightening up.</p><p class="p1">“Hey.”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t blame me, you’re the one walking around with that cute ass of yours.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko grumbled as he pulled on his shirt, but Sokka caught him smiling.</p><p class="p1">The bed was much more spacious than the one on the ship, and with a few more layers of furs and blankets to keep them cozy throughout the night. Sokka adored flopping into it, curling up in the soft covers, the air heavy with the smell of their put-out cookfire. <em>This is all I need,</em> he thought, watching Zuko climb in. <em>Him and my home.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko blew out a small lamp, plunging the room into darkness, and then Sokka felt Zuko’s face nuzzle into the covers close to his.</p><p class="p1">“C’mere,” Zuko whispered, and Sokka obliged, slipping his limbs between Zuko’s, where they belonged. Sokka could feel the soft, humid puffs of Zuko’s breath on his ear.</p><p class="p1">“I can tell you put a lot of work into it. The plans,” Zuko said. His words tickled at Sokka’s ear.</p><p class="p1">“Aw, thanks baby.”</p><p class="p1">“I mean it.”</p><p class="p1">“I believe you. You know, you’re really such a softie.” Sokka laughed a little. “You’re so prickly on the outside, but inside you’re all squishy. You’re like an urchin.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m an urchin.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Poky, but cute.” Sokka poked Zuko’s cheek for emphasis, and Zuko shifted, turning away with his back to Sokka.</p><p class="p1">“I’m not cute, I’m the Fire Lord.” It was a game they played, and Sokka knew Zuko loved it. Sokka would tease Zuko, and Zuko would pretend to be disgruntled until Sokka kissed him.</p><p class="p1">Sokka wrapped himself around Zuko, lips at the back of Zuko’s neck. “You’re the cutest Fire Lord in history. The Fire Nation’s never been cuter.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re not taking my office very seriously. I’m the ruler of a whole <em>nation</em>, Sokka.” He could hear the mirth in Zuko’s hushed voice.</p><p class="p1">“That’s what I’m saying. You run a very cute nation.” Sokka peppered kisses across Zuko’s neck and shoulder, and Zuko wriggled.</p><p class="p1">“That tickles,” Zuko whined.</p><p class="p1">Sokka held his arms close around Zuko’s waist so he couldn’t twist away, and kept pressing light kisses to every inch of skin he could reach.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, come on,” he laughed, breathless, and turned to catch Sokka’s lips with his. <em>There we go. </em>The game had succeeded.</p><p class="p1">The kiss was soft, and slow, and make Sokka’s chest feel warm and full and perfect. There was no real urgency — there was nowhere to go, nowhere to be, nothing he had to do. It was finally feeling real, this thing they had going, <em>really real</em>, something anchored in this plane of existence. It was feeling like the kind of thing that could <em>keep</em> being real, for years and years; not a dream but a fact, the way that the sun rising in the east and setting in the west was a fact. Zuko’s lips on his were a fact, the only fact that Sokka really cared about at that particular moment.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s lips weren’t icy cold anymore — they were hot and slick, like the tongue that slipped into Sokka’s mouth. His hands were hot, too, fingers brushing at Sokka’s sides, tracing now-familiar patterns into his skin.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled away for a moment. “Not cold anymore?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko smiled, diving in for another kiss. Sokka could feel Zuko press in close, laying the line of his body right along Sokka’s.</p><p class="p1">“Nope, not cold at all,” Zuko said, into the crook of Sokka’s neck.</p><p class="p1">He laid lazy open-mouth kisses there, the kind that made Sokka’s skin tingle and his chest buzz with satisfaction. Sokka hummed at the sweet feeling and sank his fingers into Zuko’s hair. <em>So soft…</em></p><p class="p1">“Do you use hair products or something?” Sokka asked quietly, curling the long strands around his fingers. “It’s so smooth and shiny.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, some lotion or other they keep at the palace. I don’t really know what it is, but they put it in my hair and it smells like herbs. I think there might be ricewater in it.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, whatever it is, it certainly does the trick.” Sokka played with it, running his fingernails across Zuko’s scalp with each pass of his tongue on Sokka’s skin.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s mouth trailed up to Sokka’s again. That tongue ran over the ridge of Sokka’s teeth, and those hands gripped Sokka’s hips just a little harder, and Sokka knew what Zuko wanted.</p><p class="p1">“Baby,” Sokka started, and then Zuko let out a little noise and started kissing his way down to Sokka’s chest.</p><p class="p1">“I love when you call me that,” Zuko whispered, heated, pulling aside the collar of Sokka’s shirt.</p><p class="p1">“I know, but —” Sokka lost his train of thought for a moment when Zuko licked at the skin below his collarbone. “Ah, I’m a little tired tonight, duckie.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko paused and returned to Sokka’s lips with a soft kiss. “It was a big day.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm-hmm.” <em>One more kiss, then sleep.</em> Sokka caught Zuko’s lips again. “I’m all tuckered out.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay. Sleep sounds good.” Zuko settled into the furs, sighing.</p><p class="p1"><em>Okay. Last one.</em> Sokka kissed him again, and felt Zuko’s mouth curl into a smile. <em>One more.</em> Another kiss.</p><p class="p1">“You’ll never be able to fall asleep if you keep kissing me,” Zuko breathed, right into Sokka’s mouth. “Not that I’m complaining.”</p><p class="p1">“No, you’re right.” <em>This is the last one.</em> One last kiss, then Sokka laid back, curling around Zuko, chest pressed to Zuko’s back. “Need to get some sleep.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka had reluctantly trusted Zuko to watch the seal stew alone — “Just make sure it doesn’t boil over, okay?” “Yeah, I think I can handle one little pot” — so it was just Sokka and his dad, carving arrowhead after arrowhead.</p><p class="p1">Sokka kept his eyes focused on his work, careful not to carve out his own thumb’s flesh in addition to the bone arrowhead, but his mind wandered, flitting from thought to thought. <em>I hope Zuko’s okay with that stew… he was hopeless at the cabin. Wasted eggs. I wonder if anyone tried to teach him to cook on that ship. Was there a cook? Knowing Iroh, definitely. I hope he’s doing well. Zuko hasn’t mentioned him lately. Maybe there’s just nothing to report. </em>Sokka realized all of a sudden that they’d never talked about telling Iroh. <em>Zuko’s probably told him. He writes to Iroh all the time. Or maybe he hasn’t. Maybe he’s waiting for me? I need to tell Dad. </em></p><p class="p1">Sokka paused, and looked to his father. Hakoda was precision-focused on the carving, moving the knife with sure, practiced movements. <em>I should tell him. I have to tell him at some point.</em></p><p class="p1">He went back to carving, chewing on his bottom lip. <em>How should I even bring it up? How do I even start? This feels so different from when I told Suki. Maybe Katara’s told him already and I don’t need to talk about it. Ah, she’d never do that. She’d never tell him before I could. </em>The thought of breaking the news made Sokka’s heart race.</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Okay. I gotta tell him. “Hey Dad, I’m gay!” No, that’s too abrupt. “So I’ve been seeing someone new. He’s a boy.” Ugh, everything sounds weird. “Zuko’s my boyfriend.” I can’t do this. I wish Aang was here, he’d know what to say.</em>
</p><p class="p1">“We need more arrow shafts,” Hakoda said, rising. “I’ll be right back.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh — okay.” Then, Sokka was alone, a half-finished arrowhead in hand.</p><p class="p1"><em>Fuck, I gotta do this soon. He’s gotta know something’s up, I’m having the Fire Lord stay with me privately, for crying out loud. I’m sure the neighbors heard us the other night.</em> It had been loud. <em>Someone probably said something to him. Maybe he knows, but he’s too uncomfortable to say anything. What if he hates Zuko? What if he only tolerates Zuko as a visiting monarch? Oh, he’ll hate that we’re together. He’ll stop talking to me. He’ll —</em></p><p class="p1">Hakoda returned, setting a handful of arrow shafts on the ground.</p><p class="p1">“Dad —” Sokka started.</p><p class="p1">“Yes, son?”</p><p class="p1">The rest of Sokka’s words died in his throat. “Uh. Thanks for getting those.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka didn’t try again, he couldn’t — not when his thoughts were falling over each other, too garbled to be let out.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Even though it had only been a week or two, it felt like forever — in a good way. Zuko loved the crystal-clear sunsets, how he only had to worry about sending off a letter or two each day, and most of all making sure that he didn’t ruin Sokka’s cooking.</p><p class="p1">He’d even started learning how to sew, when Sokka had plopped him down with Kanna. She’d looked at him skeptically, eyes narrowing.</p><p class="p1">“I remember you,” she said, curt.</p><p class="p1">“Gran-Gran, he’s good now.” <em>Sokka shouldn’t be defending me. </em></p><p class="p1">“I know we didn’t meet on good terms the first time,” Zuko said, eyes on his hands. “Sokka’s told me so much about you.”</p><p class="p1">“Hmph.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka cut in, “I was hoping you could teach Zuko how to sew. He’s hopeless at taking care of himself —” Zuko protested with a <em>hey</em>, “— those palace nannies didn’t teach him shit.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka said you were really good at it.” Zuko looked at her, fully prepared to be shooed away.</p><p class="p1">“Well. Sokka’s right, I <em>am</em> good at it.” Kanna sighed. “Here, start with this sock. You can darn a sock, can’t you?”</p><p class="p1">She dropped a needle and thread into Zuko’s hands, but he just stared. She sighed again, and demonstrated how to thread it, and Zuko had messily attempted to darn the sock. He’d used way too much thread, but eventually he got it, and Kanna had raised an eyebrow before handing him another sock. It gave Zuko hope that he could win her over, one frayed sock at a time.</p><p class="p1">They’d spend some dinners alone, some with Hakoda and Kanna — at first it was stilted, but then Hakoda would launch into a tall tale, and before he knew it Zuko was laughing. Sokka would jump in every so often; he knew all of Hakoda’s stories by heart. It was almost too much, one night, when Hakoda had said <em>Love you, son,</em> over his shoulder, and Zuko felt his throat tighten out of nowhere, tears prickling at his nose. He’d pulled it together in time, but not before Sokka noticed. Thankfully, Sokka didn’t say anything.</p><p class="p1">Each morning, Zuko would sit with a steaming cup of tea and write his memos for the day, brushing them down messily so he could get on with the good stuff: kissing Sokka <em>good morning</em> and going into town to help with the restoration.</p><p class="p1">It was a morning like that, when he was bundled tight against the cold, clutching his packaged memos, racing down to the docks to send out a messenger hawk, when he got Suki’s letters.</p><p class="p1">“These are for you, Your Highness,” Kevruk, one of the northern waterbenders, said. “A bunch of hawks just came in. They’re lucky they got through — heard there was a bit of a storm to the northwest.”</p><p class="p1">He placed three scrolls in Zuko’s hands, all packaged in sleek red tubes with a large royal seal.</p><p class="p1">“Thanks,” Zuko said absently, unfurling the first one.</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Fire Lord Zuko,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I hope your diplomatic mission is going well. It should be productive, especially for public relations. I’m sure you’re keeping in contact with your Minister of Intelligence, but I thought I should send you a letter as well, in case the others got lost. There’s no cause for alarm — I’m sure I’ve alarmed you just by writing that — but there has been another loyalist protest in the city proper since your departure. It’s nothing to worry about, merely more of the same pro-war sentiment. However, I think it would be wise to start thinking over some public relations strategies to implement upon your return.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Give Sokka my best. I hope to see you both soon.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Commander Suki of the Kyoshi Warriors</em>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko tucked the letter under his arm, opening the next one.</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Fire Lord Zuko,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I’m not sure how long you planned to stay in the Southern Water Tribe, but I’d advise shortening the visit. Aang has been doing his best, but the situation with the Earth Kingdom and the colonies is deteriorating. I fear we may have to deal with open revolt if Aang can’t manage to turn things around. The Earth King is demanding a faster timeline, and the colonial governors are threatening armed conflict over it. I would advise writing to the governors soon to quell some of the unrest. I hope this reaches you quickly.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Commander Suki</em>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">He opened the last one, frantic.</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Zuko —</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>No time for formalities. You have to return, now. It’s clear now that you have a few loyalists among your minister’s ranks. I’m not sure who, but I’ve heard whispers. I’m sending this as soon as I can. Please, there’s not much I can do as just Commander of your guard. I’m holding down the fort, but with the colonies and the loyalists I can’t put out every fire. Come back, please, we need you.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Suki</em>
</p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko stuffed the letters into their tubes and raced back the way he came, running up to Sokka, who was standing in front of the little door with a hot cup of tea in his hands.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko?” Sokka saw Zuko’s face, and his smile fell. “Babe, what is it?”</p><p class="p1">“I just got all these letters from Suki,” Zuko said breathlessly, holding up the tubes. “The ministers — they’re loyalists. Some of them. She doesn’t know who. The colonies are revolting.” Zuko’s breathing wasn’t slowing, even though he’d stopped running. “It’s all falling apart, Sokka. It’s all ruined, I’ve let it all —”</p><p class="p1">“Hold on, just…” Sokka set down his cup, taking the letters from Zuko’s hands and setting them to the side, too. “Take a breath.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.” Zuko panted, rubbing a hand through his hair. “Suki, she sounded really worried. Like, really worried.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay,” Sokka said, taking Zuko’s hands in his. “Then we’ll go solve the problem.”</p><p class="p1">“No, I can’t make you leave again.”</p><p class="p1">“It’ll be okay.”</p><p class="p1">“No, no, I won’t. You’ve only been here for two weeks. You can’t leave already.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka sighed. Zuko was determined on one thing — Sokka wasn’t leaving.</p><p class="p1">He’d watched Sokka light up when he saw how his home had grown, seen how wide he smiled giving his grandmother a hug, heard how hard he laughed at his father’s jokes. Zuko wasn’t letting Sokka give that up just because Zuko’s broken little nation couldn’t hold itself together for two seconds.</p><p class="p1">Sokka considered Zuko. “You’re really not gonna let me come with you.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, you’re so happy here. How could I — how could I take you away from that?” Zuko felt tears brewing in his eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I love my home. I also love you.”</p><p class="p1">“I love you, too, and that’s why I can’t make you leave.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re not <em>making</em> me do anything!” Sokka was raising his voice, and it only provoked Zuko’s tears more.</p><p class="p1">“You’re gonna resent me,” Zuko said, struggling to keep hot tears from falling down his cheeks. “You spent months in the Fire Nation, and I could only give you two weeks here. It’s not fair to you!”</p><p class="p1">“You’re gonna leave me here?” Sokka said, bitter. “You’re gonna just leave?”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, I have to go fix this… I don’t want to leave you.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka let out a sharp breath, then pressed a hand to his temple. Zuko felt a tear roll down his face, searing hot in comparison to his ice-cold skin.</p><p class="p1">“I know, I know. I’m just upset,” Sokka said, sighing. There was a heavy pause, then: “I’ll miss you.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko hauled Sokka in for the tightest hug he could muster. “I’ll miss you, too.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka was crying a little, too, while Zuko packed, so Zuko kissed all the tears away before emerging from the house, wishing that he were anyone else. If he were someone else, then he could stay in there forever, kissing Sokka until he had no reason to cry anymore.</p><p class="p1">That night, in the cabin of the ship, was cold, and sleepless, and lonely.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A sad ending :( I promise they'll be back together before you know it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Love, Sokka</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Even while they're apart, Sokka finds ways to make Zuko roll his eyes. And blush. Meanwhile, in the Southern Water Tribe, Aang and Katara give Sokka a talking-to.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I had so much fun writing their letters! I hope you guys like this chapter, even though Sokka and Zuko are apart :(</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">There was a brusque knock at the great double doors, and at Zuko’s call, a timid messenger peeked his head in.</p><p class="p1">“Should I… come back later, Your Highness?” he asked, a messenger hawk tube in hand.</p><p class="p1">“No, no, come in,” Suki answered for him. She sat up from where she was laid, head in Zuko’s lap, and closed her book. It was a history of unconventional military strategies throughout the centuries; Zuko had recommended it, guessing that Suki would enjoy the author’s cheeky prose (he guessed correctly).</p><p class="p1">“Ah…” the man hesitated, glancing nervously between the two, until Zuko gave an exasperated wave. He gingerly stepped over the threshold. “From the South Pole.”</p><p class="p1">At that, Zuko perked up considerably. Another letter — each one was the highlight of Zuko’s day.</p><p class="p1">“None for me?” Suki asked, stretching.</p><p class="p1">“Erm, I didn’t know your. Ahem. Location, so I left your letter in your quarters. Commander.” The man gave a jerky, half-hearted bow, like it was a worried afterthought.</p><p class="p1">“Alright, that sounds fine. Zuko, would you like some more tea?” she asked, as the messenger scurried back out the door.</p><p class="p1">“Sure.” Zuko was thumbing open the blue tube. “Ugh, do they all have to act like I’m having an affair with you? This is getting ridiculous.” <em>I’m allowed to have friends I don’t sleep with. Or, I guess. Friends I slept with once. But they don’t know about that. Right?</em></p><p class="p1">“Just ignore it, it’s harmless. Agh, it got cold.” Suki stuck out her tongue, tea cup in hand.</p><p class="p1">“I know, but the rumors…” Zuko set the tube down for a beat, wrapping his hands around Suki’s teacup to warm it up. She smiled when it started steaming gently.</p><p class="p1">“Thanks.” Suki punctuated it with a peck on Zuko’s cheek. “You worry too much about what other people say about you.”</p><p class="p1">“I worry exactly the right amount,” Zuko grumbled, but Suki left it, sipping her tea.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>To His Royal Highness, the Fiery-est of all Lords, my dearest candlewick, the flint to my steel —</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted. He wondered how Sokka had the time to come up with all of his nicknames. He was supposed to be working on the restoration, not brainstorming ways to make Zuko roll his eyes.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>— my little hotpot, my turtleduck, Zuko:</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>How’s it hangin’, hot stuff? Get it, ‘cause you’re hot? Like a firebender, but you’re also sexy. I miss you, just as much as I missed you yesterday. Maybe more. I think more, today, because I wasn’t quite so busy. I didn’t have as much to distract me from missing you. We’re really getting a lot done on the main hall, now that the port is pretty much finished. There are a few new merchants in town! Someone from Whaletail Island moved here, can you believe that? It’s a little weird, having non-water tribe people around, but they make the tastiest bao, and they’ve been really nice so far. It’s a young couple — if Gran-Gran doesn’t stop pestering them about when they’re gonna have cute babies, I think she might drive them away.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I know I just got a letter from you the other day, but I can’t wait for the next one. I love them. I feel so official and fancy, getting all these royal missives. I would rather have the real thing, of course. I think about you all the time. I think about your eyes, your hair… by the way, could you bring back some of that royal hair stuff you use? ‘cause you always smell delicious. Like I could just eat you up. Or out. I also think about that cute ass of yours —</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko’s face went hot and he cleared his throat. He turned, tilting the page so that Suki couldn’t accidentally see Sokka’s raunchy words.</p><p class="p1">Suki raised an eyebrow. “A secret letter? What is it, threats to royal security? You know I’m the head of royal security,” she teased.</p><p class="p1">“No, it’s just private,” Zuko mumbled, holding the letter closer.</p><p class="p1">“Ooh, so it’s <em>that</em> kind of letter,” Suki sing-songed, eyes sparking with mischief. “Should I give you two some privacy?”</p><p class="p1">“Wha —” Zuko sputtered, “I’m not — It’s —”</p><p class="p1">“You know, I only tease you so much because you make it so fun,” she said, poking Zuko’s knee. He’d curled up against the arm of the couch, letter safely beyond her reach.</p><p class="p1">Zuko glowered at her, but Suki just smiled in satisfaction and cracked open her book again.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>— all the time. Your ass is pretty powerful, you know… it’s distracting, even when it’s not here. Do I distract you, I wonder? You told me once that you think about me in meetings. I hope you still do. Do I cause royal problems for you, baby? Do you think about me, under the table, with my mouth on your —</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko had to look away for a moment, to breathe through an inopportune flash of arousal. He was loathe to prove Suki right. Zuko decided to skip the next paragraph… best to save that for later.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Okay, I’ll give it a rest. I hope you’re squirming in your royal robes now, at least. Anyways. I for real miss you so much. I’ve been working more on my carving skills — I’m trying to get better at detail work. I made you something. I put it in the messenger hawk tube… I hope it doesn’t fall out. That would be super lame.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Write me back soon, please. Again. I love you so much, duckie. </em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Love, from your genius, hilarious, wildly intelligent, witty, amazing, never been seen before, super hot and sexy boyfriend,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Sokka</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko shook the messenger tube, and something small rattled around inside. He turned the tube over into his hand, and Suki looked up from her book.</p><p class="p1">Out tumbled a small carving, only an inch or so long, made out of a bleached arctic hippo tusk.</p><p class="p1">“What is it?” Suki asked, marking her page.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka made something for me,” Zuko explained, and turned it over in his hand.</p><p class="p1">Suki clapped a hand over her mouth and laughed, while Zuko rolled his eyes, cheeks burning.</p><p class="p1">It was a very small, very precisely rendered, miniature dick.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“How tall do you want this to be?” Kevruk asked, holding the bent ice over his head.</p><p class="p1">Sokka checked the plans, then looked back up at the mezzanine in progress.</p><p class="p1">“A little higher?” Sokka called, and the waterbenders pulled an icy jut out from the walls. “Hm, maybe a little higher?” One of them gave a long-suffering sigh, but they followed instructions. “Perfect!”</p><p class="p1">Sokka had to leave headspace for the fountain, okay?</p><p class="p1">Hakoda clapped a hand on Sokka’s back. “Looking good. You’re really putting those northerners to work, son. I’m proud of you.”</p><p class="p1">“Thanks, Dad.” It was exhilarating, seeing his dreams come to life, and knowing his father admired his work made it all the better.</p><p class="p1">Sokka watched the benders carefully craft the mezzanine level, bending thick slabs of ice into arches for support.</p><p class="p1">“Careful, not too thin!” Sokka called, and Kevruk huffed.</p><p class="p1">“We know what we’re doing, Sokka!”</p><p class="p1">“Okay, sorry!” Sokka winced, but he knew Kevruk, at least, didn’t begrudge him the nitpicking. They’d managed to build up some rapport, over lunches and ice-engineering debates.</p><p class="p1">“Chief, Ambassador,” came a voice from behind them, and they turned to see a sailor holding a messenger hawk tube. “Sorry to interrupt.”</p><p class="p1">As soon as he saw the royal seal, Sokka grabbed for the tube.</p><p class="p1">“There’s — ah, here. It’s from —”</p><p class="p1">“The Fire Lord, yeah.” Sokka was buzzing with excitement.</p><p class="p1">The sailor nodded respectfully to both of them, ducking out of the way of a falling shard of ice as he left. Kevruk apologized sheepishly, to which the sailor glowered, saying something about <em>careless northerners</em>. Sokka didn’t have time to deal with that; besides, the sailor knew he was entering a construction site.</p><p class="p1">“Another letter? You and Lord Zuko are getting pretty close, huh.” Hakoda’s tone was light, casual as anything, but it still made Sokka stiffen.</p><p class="p1">“Um. Yeah! We’re, uh…” It was on the tip of Sokka’s tongue, <em>right there</em>, he could just say it, it wouldn’t be a big deal — “really good friends!” Sokka laughed, hoping he didn’t sound as nervous as he was. “I mean, we fought in a war together, of course we’d be buddies, you know how that goes,” Sokka rambled, rolling up his plans.</p><p class="p1">“Hm, yeah. I think I do,” Hakoda smiled, and Sokka could <em>swear</em> he saw some mischief in his dad’s eyes, but he couldn’t be sure because Sokka was hurrying away as fast as he could.</p><p class="p1">“I gotta go, I’ll see you later Dad!” Sokka threw over his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">Sokka tried to put the whole <em>telling my dad about dating a monarch </em>issue out of his brain, focusing instead on getting into his house in record time — without slipping on the ice, of course. He’d prefer to read Zuko’s letter without a bruised tailbone.</p><p class="p1">The little cottage was a bubble of warmth, embers from the breakfast cookfire still smoldering. Smoke curled up and out of the small vent at the peak of the roof as Sokka plopped down on a mat, tearing open that pretty royal seal. Sure, he’d gotten a letter the day before, too, but that was the day before. He hadn’t gotten one yet that day.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Sokka, my beloved,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>You should give me a warning for when I need to read your letters alone. Suki nearly got an eyeful of exactly what your PRIVATE plans are for when I return. Please read that word again: </em>
  <b>
    <em>PRIVATE</em>
  </b>
  <em>. I love your letters, but if someone got ahold of these…</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I’m so glad the restoration is making such great progress. You’re an incredible leader, so of course it is. I’ll have to try this bao you like so much, when I’m down south again —</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka chuckled to himself. <em>Heh. “Down south.”</em></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>— I can almost hear you make a dirty joke, there. You’re a nuisance sometimes, but you’re my nuisance. </em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">He grinned. Zuko knew him so well.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>I’m trying my best to come back, love. It’s taking longer than I thought to find good replacements for those loyalists… it’s hard to find people that have both the experience and forward-thinking attitude that I need. Suki’s doing her best to advise me, but I can’t make my entire cabinet just her… as much as I’d like to. I’m sure she’s told you about Ty Lee. They’re going on a date tomorrow, Suki’s very excited.</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">She had written as much.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>But even though it’s been a little frustrating at times, we’re making progress. Aang and Katara were here for a bit, since the situation with the colonies has been smoothed over. It’s a little… tenuous, right now, but I think we’re getting close to the point where I’m not as direly needed in the palace. I can’t wait to be back with you. It’s agony, the meetings without you, sleeping alone. I’ll be back soon, I have to be. </em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>All my love,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Duckie</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka shook out the tube, and just like with the last letter, more scraps of fine royal paper fluttered to the ground. He picked them up: a few sketches, one of a turtleduck, mouth open in a silent <em>quack</em>; one of a leaf, filled in orange-red with quick strokes of watercolor; and a scrap with a few lines of characters scrawled down:</p><p class="p1">
  <em>My love, memory</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>The earth mourns your absence, too,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Softly, in snowfall</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka tucked the poem into the interior pocket of his coat, the one close to his chest.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">The turtleduck pond was devoid of turtleducks, disappointingly — <em>probably too cold for them. I wonder where they go in the winter. I hope they’re okay. </em>The maple leaves laid dead and brown on the ground, and the earth was beginning to get frosty and crunchy underfoot.</p><p class="p1">Zuko let out a puff of fire-breath, glad his thicker robes were finally out of storage. He pushed a little warmth into his fingers, since they’d started to go all pink and numb from the cold.</p><p class="p1">“I thought I might find you here.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned, and saw a ghost.</p><p class="p1">Or, rather, he <em>thought</em> he saw a ghost, at first: the years hadn’t changed her at all.</p><p class="p1">“Mai,” he breathed, and she crossed her arms, lips pressing into a thin line.</p><p class="p1">“That’s my name.” Her voice was as frosty as the air.</p><p class="p1">Zuko scrambled to his feet, moving to hug her, but he stopped in his tracks when she stepped back.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko,” she started, and turned to the side, silent. That silence hung in the air, and the air held its breath, too, still and cold.</p><p class="p1">“You’re here,” Zuko said, dumbly.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, here I am.”</p><p class="p1">“I — I was going to write you —”</p><p class="p1">“But you didn’t, did you.”</p><p class="p1">“I didn’t know where you were!” Zuko felt anger — no, that was the wrong word — <em>hurt</em>, and frustration, lash out in in chest. How was he supposed to address a letter to someone who didn’t want to be found?</p><p class="p1">“You could’ve — you could’ve given it to Ty Lee, or something!” Mai huffed, lip curling.</p><p class="p1">Zuko focused on his breathing. That was one thing, one tiny thing he’d managed to get better at in the intervening years: not letting his anger get the better of him.</p><p class="p1">“I’m sorry,” he said, forcing himself to relax. Breathe. <em>I was the one who hurt Mai in the first place.</em></p><p class="p1">“Hmph.”</p><p class="p1">Another pause.</p><p class="p1">“Why now?” he asked, watching her, but she kept her eyes turned away. “After all this time?”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t know,” she bit. “I think… I think I know what I want, now.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s stomach dropped, rolled, tumbled right into the frigid turtleduck pond. He thought of Sokka, and wondered if this was what he felt like when he had to tell Suki.</p><p class="p1">“Mai, I’m —” he started.</p><p class="p1">“No, let me fucking talk for a second.” Her narrowed eyes finally found his. “It was always about you, wasn’t it? It — ugh,” Mai snarled, pinching the bridge of her nose.</p><p class="p1">Zuko stayed silent.</p><p class="p1">“This isn’t how I wanted to start.” She sighed. “I’ve been… all over the place, really. I visited Ty Lee, on Kyoshi. I was in Ba Sing Se, for a while… I spent some time with my family.” Her face relaxed. “I love my brother, I really do, but — the more I watched my mother… I’ve been avoiding you, Zuko. Ty Lee kept pestering me about it, about coming for those anniversaries. I couldn’t do it.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko almost opened his mouth to say something, but thought better of it.</p><p class="p1">“I’ve been avoiding you, and I know it’s confusing, because I betrayed her for you. Azula, I mean. I haven’t been to see her yet.” She looked at the ground.</p><p class="p1">“Neither have I,” Zuko finally said, softly. He hadn’t been able to bear going to visit her, not yet. Thinking of her, wailing and chained, still made him feel as raw and broken as the day his father burned him.</p><p class="p1">“My mother… she’s. She’s no one, really,” Mai said. “I love her. But her life — her whole life is about my father. His political career. My life, too, before Azula came back into it.” Tears — a rare sight, for Mai — glistened in her eyes, but didn’t fall. “I know she was horrible to me. She didn’t care about me, not really. Not like she should have. But at least with Azula, I was my own person, a little bit. I wasn’t — I wasn’t just <em>Ukano’s daughter.</em></p><p class="p1">“I thought about joining the Kyoshi Warriors for a second there — but they weren’t quite right, either. Ba Sing Se was nice, I guess. At least no one there knew who I was, I could just — be Mai. I worked in a knife shop, you know.”</p><p class="p1">“Really?” Zuko said, before he could think about it, and the barest hint of a smile pulled at the corner of Mai’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. It was fun. Picked up a few new tricks, but it wasn’t what I wanted to do with my life. I guess I’m not sure, exactly, who I want to be, but. I know who I don’t want to be.” Mai took a deep breath. “You — I betrayed her for you. I loved you. I… I think I still love you. The way I’ll always love you, but — who would I be, with you? I’d be a <em>prop</em>,” she said, spitting out the last word.</p><p class="p1">“You’re not —”</p><p class="p1">“Let me <em>finish!</em>” she spat, fists curling at her sides, and Zuko followed orders.</p><p class="p1">“It doesn’t matter, Zuko, how much you love me, or how much I love you. You’re the <em>Fire Lord</em>, and I’d never be anything more than your wife. Ever. I’ve spent my whole life — my whole fucking life! — being someone else’s.” She laughed dryly, mirthlessly. “My father’s daughter, Azula’s henchman. I can’t… I can’t be the Fire Lady. A royal <em>womb</em>. That’s all I’d ever be, no matter how much I want that to not be true. Or you want it to not be true. I’m sorry.”</p><p class="p1">She fell silent, crossing her arms again, and eyed him carefully. Zuko took that as an okay to speak.</p><p class="p1">“So it’s over,” he said, a mess of feelings twisting in his gut. Relief, guilt, an aching sadness.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.” One tear managed to escape her. “I didn’t want to do this in a letter, so. Here I am. It’s over.”</p><p class="p1">“Mai, can I — could I hug you?” Zuko asked, softly, and she looked at him with wide, surprised eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Y—Yeah,” she stammered, and he wrapped her in a hug. He had forgotten how slim she was, like one of her knives. “You got taller,” she commented.</p><p class="p1">“That tends to happen when you’re gone for five years,” Zuko said, and she made a choked noise, something between a laugh and a sob. He heard her sniff, but when he pulled back she was still composed, one finger brushing away a rogue tear.</p><p class="p1">“So,” she said, taking a breath and pulling the edge of her robes straight. “That’s what I came here to say.”</p><p class="p1">“I understand.” Zuko really did. His position posed problems, for anyone in his life. Including himself. <em>Including Sokka. Maybe it’ll drive him away, too. </em>Zuko pushed the thought down. “I’ll always love you, too, you know. Isn’t that what they say, about your first love?”</p><p class="p1">“Maybe.”</p><p class="p1">“Mai, I have something to tell you, too.” She looked at him in surprise, then with that sharp gaze he’d grown so used to. Zuko took a steadying breath. “I’m… in a relationship. With someone else.”</p><p class="p1">She turned slightly, her eyes flitting to the tree behind Zuko. “Who is she?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, um… It’s not really. A she.”</p><p class="p1">Her gaze snapped back up to Zuko, a question on her face, so Zuko just barreled ahead. <em>Just get the whole thing over with.</em></p><p class="p1">“I’m dating a guy. For a while, now. It just kind of happened, I wasn’t planning it, or anything. It’s Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">Mai’s eyes widened, and she looked at the tree again. “Huh.”</p><p class="p1">“You and I hadn’t spoken in years, and —”</p><p class="p1">“You never told me you liked men,” she said, still looking into the distance.</p><p class="p1">“I, uh, didn’t know. Until recently. Like I said, it just kind of… happened.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Her hand drifted up to her mouth, fingers brushing her bottom lip. “I guess it’s… he’s here a lot, I suppose, being ambassador and all… there’s no harm in exploring —”</p><p class="p1">“It’s more than that,” Zuko interrupted, feeling defensive. All the guards and servants thought — all the rumors were that he was <em>fooling around</em> with that Water Tribe ambassador, and it stung to know that anyone thought Sokka was just a royal dalliance.</p><p class="p1">Mai’s eyebrows furrowed. “Okay. Sorry for trying to <em>empathize.</em>”</p><p class="p1">“Ugh.” Zuko knew he’d snapped at her. <em>It’s not her fault this is complicated.</em> “I didn’t mean for that to come out that way.”</p><p class="p1">“…Apology accepted, I guess.”</p><p class="p1">The silence was awkward, so Zuko finally broke it.</p><p class="p1">“I’d like to be friends,” he started, and Mai immediately looked skeptical, so he followed up with, “someday, at least. You’ve known me since I was little, and were with me through the most… tumultuous time in my life. I’m never going to forget what you did for me.” Mai’s face twisted — it was hard to talk about those memories. “You’re never… not going to mean a lot to me, Mai.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Someday.” Mai leaned in for a hug, which took Zuko by surprise. He didn’t know quite what she smelled like, but it was immediately familiar. It was her.</p><p class="p1">She pulled back quickly, as if wanting to gloss over the fact that she hugged Zuko at all.</p><p class="p1">“The servants put my luggage in one of the rooms, even though I told them not to,” she said, rolling her eyes.</p><p class="p1">“You can stay here, if you want. And, if you do, we don’t have to talk. If you don’t want to,” Zuko said hurriedly.</p><p class="p1">“Hm… I need a good pampering. I might as well do it on your dime.” She seemed hesitant, for a moment. “I’ll… maybe I’ll see you for dinner. Tomorrow.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure. Let me know if I can get the cooks to make something you like,” Zuko offered, and Mai smiled a little, finally. It was a smile Zuko had sorely missed.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Katara looked beyond pleased to receive a hero’s welcome: townspeople gathered to wave her and Aang down, shouting their hellos. Appa landed with a thud, rumbling, little puffs of snow billowing up around his feet and tail. He looked a little surprised when a pair of children ran right up to his snout, laughing, but let them give his fur a few clumsy pets.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, Sokka!” Aang waved brightly. He hopped over he crowd, alighting in front of Sokka, eerily unbothered by the polar air.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, man.” Sokka was wrapped up in a hug before he knew what was happening.</p><p class="p1">“It’s good to be back.” Aang glanced around. “No Zuko? I would have thought he’d be here, since Katara and I got the situation in the colonies under control.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, he’s still transitioning his new ministers.”</p><p class="p1">“He’ll be back soon, buddy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka rolled his eyes. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m fine.”</p><p class="p1">They pushed through the crowd, so that Sokka could give Katara a proper hug, too. She squeezed Sokka tight, enough to make him wheeze.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t suffocate me,” Sokka croaked, and she laughed.</p><p class="p1">“Katara, Master Katara!” a small, high voice crowed, and then a little girl was tumbling out of the crowd, with a distressed woman — presumably her mother — following close behind.</p><p class="p1">“I’m so sorry, Master Katara,” the woman said, placing a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “She’s just so excited —”</p><p class="p1">“Look, Katara! Look what I can do!” the girl chirped, holding out her hands, brow furrowing in concentration.</p><p class="p1">The snow between them shivered, then twirled up into a ball, before trembling and falling to the ground again. Katara’s eyes lit up as she dropped to kneel before the girl.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, you’re a waterbender!” Katara said, and the little girl beamed.</p><p class="p1">“Just like you! I’m gonna practice all day so I can fight like you, Master Katara.” The little girl was practically vibrating with excitement, shifting from foot to foot.</p><p class="p1">“What’s your name, sweetie?” Katara asked, grinning from ear to ear.</p><p class="p1">“Uki,” the girl replied, looking a bit shy for the first time.</p><p class="p1">“It’s so good to meet you, Uki.” Katara held out her hand, and the little girl shook it. “Did you just discover you’re a waterbender?”</p><p class="p1">“Last week,” the mother replied. “Isn’t that right, Uki?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s so exciting, Uki. You’re so good at it already, but would you like to learn how to waterbend even better?”</p><p class="p1">Uki jumped up and down, barely containing a squeak of excitement. “Yes, yes please.”</p><p class="p1">“You’ll be a master before you know it.” Katara stood, looking to her mother. “Why don’t you guys come by for dinner sometime, and we can figure out a lesson plan?”</p><p class="p1">“We’d be honored,” the mother said. “I’m Ticasuk, by the way.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s lovely to meet you, too, Ticasuk.”</p><p class="p1">“Let’s give Master Katara some space, okay Uki?”</p><p class="p1">“Okayy.” Uki pouted, but let her mother guide her away, back towards the tents and houses.</p><p class="p1">Katara looked about as excited as Uki, turning to Sokka and Aang with wide eyes, clasping her hands together.</p><p class="p1">“Guys, there’s more waterbenders! She’s — she’s a waterbender!”</p><p class="p1">“This is incredible, Katara. It’s so exciting,” Aang said, wrapping his hands around hers.</p><p class="p1">“I guess it’s <em>Sifu</em> Katara again, huh?” Sokka crossed his arms and smirked. It was good to see his little sister so excited, but he couldn’t resist being a bit of a shit. “More magic water shenanigans.”</p><p class="p1">Katara rolled her eyes. “Magic water is what’s building all those plans of yours, you know.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I know.” Sokka hugged her tight again.</p><p class="p1">Dinner that night was five-flavor soup, the cooking of which Katara tried to take over, <em>like always, she thinks I’m still a stupid boy, can’t take care of myself</em>. Aang sat back and watched the siblings bicker.</p><p class="p1">“That’s not how you’re supposed to make it,” Katara chided, but Sokka just stuck out his tongue.</p><p class="p1">“It’s how <em>I </em>like it, okay, and you’re my guests, so that’s that.”</p><p class="p1">“I knew we should have stayed with Dad. Where <em>is</em> Dad?”</p><p class="p1">“Hunting trip. He’ll be back tomorrow, and then you can go stay with him, since you hate it here so much.”</p><p class="p1">It was Katara’s turn to stick out her tongue at Sokka.</p><p class="p1">“<em>So</em>,” Aang interrupted, clearly trying to change the subject. “How did Hakoda take the news?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked up at Aang, confused. “What news?”</p><p class="p1">“Uh. About you and Zuko…?”</p><p class="p1">“Ohhh. Yeah. I, erm.” Sokka felt his shoulders bunch up. “I haven’t exactly told him yet.”</p><p class="p1">“Wh — Sokka.” Katara had <em>that tone</em> to her voice, the one that said <em>why are you like this</em>.</p><p class="p1">“I’m gonna get around to it, okay? There just… hasn’t been a good time.”</p><p class="p1">Katara pursed her lips. “You’ve been here for weeks.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s hard to bring up!”</p><p class="p1">“Are you worried about… how he’ll react?” Aang asked carefully.</p><p class="p1">“No, not really — I don’t know.”</p><p class="p1">His sister sighed, crossing her legs to sit next to Aang. “You know that Dad doesn’t care about that kind of stuff, right? No one around here does, anyway. No one ever said anything about Anek and Kyi.”</p><p class="p1">“I know, Katara!”</p><p class="p1">“Then why haven’t you told him? You told us a while ago.”</p><p class="p1">“Katara, it’s just —” Sokka huffed. <em>She doesn’t get it. Aang’s the Avatar, of course Dad is gonna be on board. </em>“I know he won’t care about boys. I just don’t know how he’s gonna feel about Zuko, specifically.”</p><p class="p1">“What, because he’s Fire Nation?” Aang said, sounding genuinely surprised.</p><p class="p1">“He’s not just Fire Nation, he’s <em>the Fire Lord.</em>”</p><p class="p1">“He also ended the war,” Aang added. He leaned into Katara’s side, letting her trace a hand over his bald head.</p><p class="p1">“I guess,” Sokka grumbled.</p><p class="p1">“You gotta tell Dad at some point, Sokka.” Katara’s voice was gentler now, at the very least.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I will. Just, can we drop this, please?” Sokka spooned the soup into three bowls. “Dinner’s ready, anyways. Let’s talk about something else.”</p><p class="p1">Katara raised a brow, looking at Sokka skeptically, but dropped the subject. <em>Thank the spirits.</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Did you catch the hint of Bakoda? Also, I teared up a little bit writing Katara meeting the little waterbender girl.... we were robbed of seeing Sifu Katara train a new generation of southern waterbenders.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. My Own Private Oasis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko returns, and adjusts to life with a few less things on his to-do list.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I couldn't have them be apart for more than a chapter :) This chapter's got a bit of everything: some spice, some fluff, a little angst to keep things interesting.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka never thought he’d be so overjoyed to see a Fire Nation icebreaker pulling in to dock in the Southern Water Tribe, but here he is, watching breathlessly. <em>If fifteen-year-old me could see me now… he’d denounce me for high treason.</em></p><p class="p1">It takes <em>forever</em>, it seems like, for the ship to pull gently in, lining up to the new docks they’d just finished constructing. Fire Nation seamen shouted, milling about, and Sokka’s eyes searched for a familiar face — <em>Wow, Zuko brought the whole palace, seems like.</em></p><p class="p1">Then, there: his face appeared over the prow, cloaked in his winter regalia, scanning the docks. Sokka threw his arm up to wave, and once Zuko caught sight of that he was grinning and waving, too. <em>He’s back, he’s back, he’s finally back.</em></p><p class="p1">Once they finally docked, Zuko was pushing past guards and sailors, and Sokka was pushing past merchants and fishermen, until they collided in a mess of arms.</p><p class="p1">“I missed you,” Sokka said, sinking his face into Zuko’s shoulder. He could feel Zuko’s head lean against his, feel Zuko’s arms squeeze tighter.</p><p class="p1">“I missed you, too.” Zuko’s voice was tender, more tender than a best-bro’s voice would be, and Sokka could feel Zuko’s breath on his cheek, and Sokka wanted nothing more than to kiss Zuko senseless, but they were <em>very much </em>standing on the docks, surrounded by curious eyes.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled away, hands on either of Zuko’s shoulders, and cleared his throat.</p><p class="p1">“Good to see you again, buddy,” Sokka said, pulling out his most nonchalant voice. If he didn’t know Zuko so well, he wouldn’t have caught the flicker of his smile dropping, for just a moment.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">Then Aang and Katara were there, all of a sudden, and Hakoda was giving Zuko a formal bow, and there was no time for Sokka to smooth over whatever had just happened. Sokka thought — <em>Zuko doesn’t want to be public yet, I didn’t… maybe I imagined it. </em></p><p class="p1">“You guys are here,” Zuko said, to Aang and Katara, and the pair grinned.</p><p class="p1">“We’re getting married!” Aang blurted, which. <em>Yeah, they’re engaged.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko repeated Sokka’s thought, and then Katara was babbling, “No, like, we’re actually making the plans now, we just talked to my dad and we think it’ll be soon —” and Hakoda was chuckling.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, congratulations, guys,” Zuko smiled, and Katara leapt into a hug.</p><p class="p1">“We’ve gotta send out the invitations soon, make sure everyone can come, it’s gonna be great we’re gonna have dancing and food and —” Aang said, quick and excited, as the five of them walked back towards the town.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was happy for his friends, he really was, but he hadn’t seen Zuko in a month and he just wanted to hold his boyfriend’s hand, but he couldn’t. And it was <em>right there,</em> tempting him, swinging gloveless — <em>his fingers must be cold, if I could hold his hand they wouldn’t be so cold, it’s freezing here why wouldn’t he wear gloves </em>— at Zuko’s side.</p><p class="p1">Once they were within striking distance of Sokka’s house, Sokka interrupted Aang’s monologue about airbender dances to give some excuse, something like “need to speak to the Fire Lord about a diplomatic issue” — doesn’t matter exactly what it was, Sokka didn’t care — and grabbed Zuko’s bare wrist. Katara rolled her eyes, but she always did that, so Sokka dragged Zuko away and had him up against the closed door of his house as fast as he could manage.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was melting between Sokka’s body and the door, mouth on Sokka’s — <em>where it belongs, </em>Sokka thought, reaching behind Zuko to click the lock shut. Sokka was glad he’d thought to install a lock; ostensibly because of the sensitive diplomatic information in the letters Sokka received as ambassador, but it was mostly useful for maintaining the Fire Lord’s dignity.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pressed into Zuko, tearing his gloves off and scrabbling at any sliver of skin Zuko had exposed — not a lot, given how voluminous his winter regalia was. It was all thick, dark red wool, layers wrapped around his neck, and a tight, long-sleeved undershirt posed an additional obstacle to Sokka’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Missed you so much,” Sokka panted into Zuko’s mouth, and felt Zuko’s hands fumbling up under Sokka’s coat, lost in his own winter clothes. <em>Too many fucking layers.</em></p><p class="p1">“I missed you more,” Zuko replied, already breathing heavily, body flexing against the press of Sokka’s.</p><p class="p1">“Thought about you… hnh, all the time,” Sokka managed to get out.</p><p class="p1">“Good.”</p><p class="p1">The kiss was messy, uncoordinated, lips and tongues mashing together like they were teenagers again. Sokka <em>felt</em> like a teenager again, his heart thumping against his sternum, thinking <em>can’t get enough, need more of him, don’t know where to put my hands next.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka grabbed Zuko’s hips, pulling him back and steering him towards the small bedroom. He wasn’t willing to stop kissing Zuko, nothing was more important than that, not even when Zuko’s heel knocked over a pot — thankfully, into some furs, so it didn’t break — or when they bumped against a set of shelves, sending whatever the hell was on those shelves tumbling to the floor.</p><p class="p1">Zuko managed to escape the kiss long enough to gasp, “Sokka —”</p><p class="p1">Sokka knew they were making a racket, but. “I don’t give a <em>shit</em>.” <em>Let them gossip.</em></p><p class="p1">They moved clumsily through the hide curtain, and Sokka got to work removing some of those damned layers they were both hidden in. He pulled off his coat, kicked off his boots — he’d have to clean up the snow they’d tracked in later — and yanked off his tunic before grabbing at Zuko’s regalia.</p><p class="p1">“All this… it’s all in my way,” Sokka mumbled, fumbling with the ornate clasp to Zuko’s thick cloak. It was a kind of clasp he hadn’t encountered before — was this Lai’s fault? Was she getting too creative? Sokka was suddenly aware that his hands were trembling, even though he had the small stove going in the corner to keep the room warm.</p><p class="p1">“Here,” Zuko said, against Sokka’s mouth, fingers drifting over Sokka’s. He had a small smile on his lips as he flicked open the clasp, shrugging off the stiff-shouldered cloak.</p><p class="p1">“Let’s get all this off,” Sokka said, pulling at the knot of Zuko’s belt, grabbing handfuls of robe and pulling them up.</p><p class="p1">Zuko laughed through it, and <em>spirits, more? </em>Underneath that robe was a layer of underclothes, that tight shirt and trousers that cinched at the ankle.</p><p class="p1">“Why do you have so many fucking clothes on?” Sokka growled, and Zuko kissed the frustration out of him.</p><p class="p1">“Because it’s cold as balls here, Sokka.”</p><p class="p1">“Not in here,” Sokka whined, “It’s warm in here.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s why I’m taking off my clothes —” Sokka dipped his hands under Zuko’s waistband, finally, <em>finally</em> getting his hands on some skin, “— stars, you’re impatient.”</p><p class="p1">“I’ve been patient for a whole month, baby,” and that name made Zuko moan a little.</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s palms were running over Sokka’s chest, and Sokka had forgotten just how <em>warm</em> Zuko was, hands like hot coals, mouth simmering on Sokka’s neck. Sokka bunched up the fabric of Zuko’s tight turtleneck in his fingers; it was startlingly soft, a thin, finely-woven knit, some sort of wool that felt like butter.</p><p class="p1">“Wow, <em>what</em> is this?” Sokka asked, looking down at the fabric tight over Zuko’s body. There was a stretch to it that Sokka had never really seen in wool before.</p><p class="p1">“Chinchilla-sheep’s wool,” Zuko said, a little brag in his voice. “Got it made just for this trip.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s fantastic, but you need to take it off. Right now.”</p><p class="p1">Off it came, fluttering to the ground, and then Sokka couldn’t resist pushing Zuko into his bed any longer. He didn’t stop to appreciate the view, he couldn’t, not when Zuko was reaching up for him with glazed eyes.</p><p class="p1">Sokka climbed over, sucking and biting at Zuko’s chest and neck, remembering the delightful noises Zuko made the last time he nipped at Zuko’s skin, and Sokka was right: Zuko groaned, writhing under the attention.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka — please, mm, oh fuck it —” Zuko growled, flipping them over, kissing him hard. The roughness startled Sokka, but it wasn’t unwelcome. In fact, it was pretty hot, having the firebender snarl into his mouth, fingernails skidding down Sokka’s sides.</p><p class="p1">Sokka breathed out a <em>yeah</em> when Zuko’s hips pressed down and tilted, rubbing up against the ache in Sokka’s trousers. He ground his hips in, giving Sokka a clumsy kind of friction, not nearly enough, not what Sokka <em>really</em> wanted.</p><p class="p1">“Baby, I want you,” Sokka panted, arching against Zuko’s chest.</p><p class="p1">“You have me,” Zuko said, settling between Sokka’s legs, charting a path to Sokka’s waist with his mouth. He tugged Sokka’s trousers down, sighing into the skin of Sokka’s stomach. “Been waiting to do this for a whole fucking month.”</p><p class="p1">There was no preamble, no teasing, just Zuko’s mouth enveloping Sokka and taking as much of him as possible, blindingly hot in the best way. Sokka let out a weird, garbled moan — it had been <em>so </em>long — and the muscles of his thighs tensed, struggling to keep his hips from jerking up.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was nothing if not enthusiastic, moaning around Sokka, tongue swiping at the underside, alternating between taking him deep into the back of his throat and pulling back to suck right at the tip, and, and, s<em>pirits he’s grinding right into the bed, those eyes rolling back, his lips, I’m — </em>and then Sokka spilled right into Zuko’s mouth before he realized what was about to happen. Sokka whined, and it was <em>so good</em>, but then it was over.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, sorry, I — came too soon,” Sokka said, breathless, a hand cupping Zuko’s cheek. His thumb swiped at the corner of Zuko’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">“’S okay,” Zuko purred, climbing back up to kiss Sokka.</p><p class="p1">“Mmph, you taste like come.”</p><p class="p1">“Whose fault is that?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka smiled, palming at Zuko’s erection, enjoying the little shudder he got.</p><p class="p1">“Your turn to defile me.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted, but let Sokka switch their places. With an orgasm to clear his head, Sokka decided to take it much slower, play with the drawstring of Zuko’s pants, mouth at anywhere but where Zuko really wanted him, until he had Zuko squirming and flushed, hips tilting in a silent beg for more.</p><p class="p1">“You’re the worst,” Zuko whined, hands brushing over Sokka’s head, giving gentle little pushes that Sokka pointedly ignored. “You fucking tease.”</p><p class="p1">“But you like being teased, don’t you baby?” Sokka knew Zuko loved that, the pet names, the excruciating wait.</p><p class="p1">“Yes,” came his answer, so quiet Sokka could barely hear it.</p><p class="p1">“Hm? I can’t hear you. You’ll have to speak up.”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Yes</em>, I like it.” Zuko’s voice was rough and deep, grating in his chest, as Sokka licked up the length of him.</p><p class="p1">“You like being teased until you’re fucking throbbing, don’t you? Does it hurt, just a little bit? So close to what you want.” Sokka pressed a kiss to the tip, and Zuko choked out a gasp.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, please…”</p><p class="p1">“I’ve been dreaming about this… hearing you beg for me again. I wanna hear you beg and plead for it, baby.”</p><p class="p1">“Please, <em>please, </em>want your mouth so fucking bad, I’m going fucking insane Sokka, I can’t — please. I need it. I’m — been so long. Just, I’m. Hunh, please —” Zuko was babbling, sentence fragments falling over each other.</p><p class="p1">Sokka enjoyed it for a moment, the way Zuko had just fallen apart for him, skin all red and flushed, words coming out in jumbled phrases, squirming underneath his tongue — and then Sokka took mercy on him, taking Zuko into his mouth.</p><p class="p1">He bucked up, hips stuttering awkwardly, and Sokka gripped Zuko’s hips, pressing them down into the furs. Sokka pulled off of Zuko, fixing him with a wicked grin. Zuko’s mouth had fallen open, lips swollen and pink, chest heaving.</p><p class="p1">“Behave.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko let out a fucking <em>whimper, stars, why is he so hot,</em> and his head fell back, so Sokka returned to his work. To Zuko’s credit, he did behave, letting Sokka keep his hips still. <em>Fuck, I missed this, </em>Sokka thought, eyes falling shut to focus on making Zuko feel good. Zuko didn’t last much longer than Sokka did, coming with a moan, bitter and salty on Sokka’s tongue. He’d never quite gotten used to the taste, but that was fine, when Zuko looked that satisfied, with his eyes half-shut and his breath coming in short pants.</p><p class="p1">“Ah, Sokka…” Zuko licked his lips, watching Sokka settle alongside Zuko’s body, head propped up in his hand.</p><p class="p1">“Mm, yes?” Sokka traced his finger in circles on Zuko’s bare chest.</p><p class="p1">Zuko heaved a sigh, shoving a hand up to brush errant strands of hair out of his face.</p><p class="p1">“That was. Hm. Was…”</p><p class="p1">“Incredible? Beyond description?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko swatted Sokka’s arm weakly. “You’re the worst.”</p><p class="p1">“You said that,” Sokka said, leaning down to kiss Zuko’s panting mouth, “but you came for me anyways, so.”</p><p class="p1">“Stop being a shit and snuggle me,” Zuko grumbled, pulling Sokka down, locking his arms around Sokka’s shoulders and neck.</p><p class="p1">Sokka laughed, throwing a leg over Zuko’s. “Fine.”</p><p class="p1">They laid there for a while, breathing against each other, letting the air cool the sweat from their skin. It was good, perfect even, to have Zuko close again, to have that campfire smell around him. It was smoky, almost sweet, mingling with the herbal hint of Zuko’s fancy hair stuff, whatever it was.</p><p class="p1">When they were together, removed from their clothes woven of different colors, alone in the dimness, it was so easy to forget that anyone else even existed. When Zuko had his hair down, puddled in a mess, eyes closed, dozing softly, he was all Sokka’s, <em>all mine. Just for me, no one else. No stupid ministers, no stupid governors. This Zuko is all mine.</em></p><p class="p1">Even quiet like that, Zuko’s body was searing hot — Sokka curled closer, seeking the heat. The air was chilly, even with that little stove. Zuko shifted in response, kissing Sokka’s neck slowly. Sokka’s knee shifted, and Zuko rolled to the side, towards Sokka.</p><p class="p1">Then Zuko whispered, shyly, into the crook of Sokka’s neck: “Think you can go again?”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko fell back into his routine easily: brewing the two of them some morning tea — he’d brought a few cases of the good stuff with him — before writing his memos for the day, and then following Sokka around like a lost puppy until dinner. Eventually Sokka would shoo him off, especially during boring construction days, so Zuko would hang out with Aang and Katara until he got nauseous, then try to find something to occupy himself. That something was usually sheepishly offering help to Kanna.</p><p class="p1">“You again,” she’d say, shaking out a rug. “Don’t you have a nation to run?”</p><p class="p1">“Not right now.” Zuko’s gloved fingers would twist nervously. “Do you need help with anything?”</p><p class="p1">She’d fix him in a skeptical gaze, then sigh and wave a hand, and Zuko would plop down wherever Kanna needed him.</p><p class="p1">He was getting better at darning, he really was. He knew it wasn’t just in his head, because Kanna started throwing bigger, more frayed rips his way. At first, she went about her business around him in silence; slowly, she started making small comments, asking small questions.</p><p class="p1">“You’re a firebender.”</p><p class="p1">“Mhm.”</p><p class="p1">“Hmph.”</p><p class="p1">Then, after a few minutes of quiet: “If you’re a firebender, that means you can get the cookfire started. Go help Sokka.” And he would.</p><p class="p1">A few days later, she asked, “How long were you banished?”</p><p class="p1">“Three years.”</p><p class="p1">“A long time, for a boy.”</p><p class="p1">“It taught me important things.”</p><p class="p1">“Maybe I should have banished Hakoda for a while. Could’ve knocked some sense into him a little earlier.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko held down a little laugh. “My family wasn’t as thoughtful as yours.”</p><p class="p1">“Well <em>that’s</em> for certain.”</p><p class="p1">Katara would circle around, tease Zuko for his clumsy stitches, or show Zuko how to get the brine for smoking meat just right.</p><p class="p1">“The salt and the heat is what preserves the tiger-seal,” she explained, pushing the slabs of meat into the tub used for soaking.</p><p class="p1">“How long do you smoke it?”</p><p class="p1">“Well, first we have to let it soak, and then dry it… we’ll be back tomorrow. The smoking takes a few hours.”</p><p class="p1">“It’s crazy that you just — know all of this.”</p><p class="p1">“Well, yeah. We don’t have palace cooks like you.” Katara scrunched her nose up, smiling and poking Zuko’s arm.</p><p class="p1">They ducked out of the smokehouse, and the cold polar air smacked Zuko in the face. He didnt think he’d ever quite get used to the constant bite of the arctic.</p><p class="p1">“Getting him whipped into shape, Katara?” Kanna called, and Katara laughed.</p><p class="p1">“Something like that. He’s like a child, he doesn’t even know how to smoke a seal!”</p><p class="p1">“Pfft.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1"><em>Zuko’s adjusting pretty well, </em>Sokka thought, catching glimpses of him learning the layout of the town, moving like he knew exactly where he was going. In between making sure the reconstruction was going according to his meticulous plans, Sokka saw how Zuko started to get more comfortable joining Katara in her daily chores, how he’d started to joke around with Kanna. It hadn’t taken long for Zuko to pack up his fine Fire Lord clothes in exchange for water tribe blues — only a few days, really. In that fur-lined coat, he didn’t look like a visiting monarch; he was just Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“Hi,” came Zuko’s voice, right behind Sokka’s ear. The main hall was almost done, just a few wings to finish, and Sokka was in the middle of poring over his plans, making sure there weren’t any details they’d missed.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, sparky.” Sokka turned, rolling up his plans.</p><p class="p1">“Kanna said she didn’t have anything left for me to do. I’m bored.” Zuko stuck out his bottom lip, trying and failing to keep a smile from his face.</p><p class="p1">“Hm.” Sokka glanced around. No waterbenders in sight. “I guess I could take a break.”</p><p class="p1">He slipped his arm around Zuko’s elbow, leading him out into the blinding brightness of the midday, sun lancing off of the winter snow. It was a beautiful day, really; not a single snow-laden cloud in sight.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled away from Zuko, turning to ball up some snow in his gloves. He jogged backward and gave the snowball a light toss, at Zuko’s chest.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, what the hell, Sokka.” Zuko said, wincing back.</p><p class="p1">“I’m just playing around. Like a snowball fight.” Zuko gave him a blank look. “What, you’ve never been in a snowball fight before?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko shook his head. “No. There’s no snow in the Fire Nation.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka laughed in delight. “There’s a first time for everything!” He balled up more snow. “Come on, I can take it. You’re talking to a snowball fight pro!”</p><p class="p1">Zuko darted out of the way of Sokka’s next snowball, yelping in surprise, but he was game; he ducked behind nearby snowbank, and Sokka launched a few more snowballs his way. <em>Better take it easy on him, since he’s a beginner. </em>A snowball from Zuko zipped past Sokka’s head, much faster than expected. <em>Okay, maybe I don’t have to take it easy on him.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka turned to run away, and felt a snowball catch him square on the back. He bunched his shoulders, yelling and grabbing more snow.</p><p class="p1">“I’m under attack!” Sokka called, laughing, throwing a few more. Zuko was running towards him, a snowball in each hand, grinning.</p><p class="p1">Sokka dodged out of the way of one of them, but that sent him tripping over a mound of snow face-first. He flipped over, and then Zuko was falling on top of him, laughing, nose red, letting the other snowball fall into the bank.</p><p class="p1">“You caught me,” Sokka said, breathless from Zuko’s weight falling on top of him. “I surrender.”</p><p class="p1">“My first snowball victory,” Zuko said, eyes flitting over Sokka’s face. His lips parted, and Sokka almost leaned up for a kiss, <em>just a little one can’t hurt, </em>but then they were both smothered in a thick wave of snow.</p><p class="p1">They scrambled, coming up from the snow sputtering. Katara stood several yards away, smirking with her hands on her hips.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, no bending!” Sokka protested. Zuko spat out a mouthful of snow.</p><p class="p1">“I’ll stop bending when you two stop being gross!” Katara called, flicking her fingers. A pellet of snow obeyed, smacking Sokka in the forehead.</p><p class="p1">“You’re one to talk!” Sokka yelled, climbing out of the snow. <em>Can’t believe she’s talking about being gross, the way she acts with Aang. Blech. </em></p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“You and Gran-Gran seem to be getting along better,” Sokka said lightly, carving the fish carefully away from the bone. He handed Zuko a plate.</p><p class="p1">“A little.” Zuko was quiet, poking at the fish.</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused while he sliced a fillet for himself, watching Zuko. He had that tension in his jaw that meant something was bothering him, and that he was working hard to keep it to himself.</p><p class="p1">“Everything going okay in the Fire Nation?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka sat cross-legged next to him, letting the silence grow for a while. He wanted to give Zuko the chance to bring whatever it was up on his own, but Zuko just picked at his fish. He took a morose bite.</p><p class="p1">“Hm. Do you not like the fish?” Sokka asked, nudging Zuko’s knee.</p><p class="p1">Zuko looked up at him, and his knotted brow relaxed a little.</p><p class="p1">“No, its good. Sorry. I’m just… I don’t know.” He poked at the fish again.</p><p class="p1">Sokka set his plate aside, placing his hand on Zuko’s knee.</p><p class="p1">“You know you can tell me anything.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko bit his lip. “Why won’t you tell your dad about us?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s stomach rolled itself into a neat, familiar knot. “Um.”</p><p class="p1">“I just, I don’t get it. He loves you, even your whole tribe loves you, none of them will care! You, you get a dad who adores you, but you won’t tell him.”</p><p class="p1">“I <em>know</em>, Zuko, you don’t think I know that?” Zuko was upset, gesturing with his hands, and it made Sokka feel like expired seal blubber.</p><p class="p1">“What are you waiting for?”</p><p class="p1">“I’m just — I haven’t been able to find the right moment, okay?”</p><p class="p1">“Have you <em>seen</em> the way people look at us?” Sokka winced. He knew Zuko was hyper-aware of it, being around Sokka in public. “It’s obvious, but I have to pretend I don’t love you. I feel like, like I’m hiding something from your family. I hate it.”</p><p class="p1">“We have to hide it in the Fire Nation!” Sokka retorted, and wanted to take it back as soon as it came out of his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“You know why!” Zuko shoved his face into his hands. “They’d — they’d hate me. It would be —”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I’m sorry.”</p><p class="p1">“We’ve told all our friends, so why not your family?” Zuko looked at him with an open, vulnerable face, and Sokka just wanted to kiss it away, but he knew that wasn’t the right thing to do at the moment.</p><p class="p1">“It’s… it’s different. It feels bigger, I don’t know why.” Sokka watched the fire pop. “I mean, have you told Iroh?”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Of course</em> I’ve told Uncle, Sokka,” Zuko huffed. “You’re too important to me not to tell him.”</p><p class="p1"><em>Oh. Is that what this is about? </em>“You’re important to me,” Sokka said, quieter.</p><p class="p1">Zuko pressed his lips together, eyes bitter. “I know, but. I still… I feel like a dirty secret.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko,” Sokka breathed, launching forward to wrap his arms around his shoulders. Zuko’s back was stiff for a moment before relaxing into the hug. Sokka felt Zuko’s hands come to rest on his sides.</p><p class="p1">“It’s stupid, I know —” Zuko started, voice muffled in Sokka’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“It’s not stupid.” Sokka squeezed Zuko tighter.</p><p class="p1">“I <em>know</em> you love me, and I know I shouldn’t rush you, I don’t <em>want</em> to rush you, but I still feel — it’s just that,” Sokka pulled away, to cup Zuko’s face in his hands, “I spend so much time in the palace worrying about what they all think of me, and I feel so <em>paranoid, </em>all the time<em>,</em> and it’s like, if we can’t be open here, where can we?”</p><p class="p1">“That’s not stupid to think.” Zuko’s face was pinched, like he was waiting for Sokka to lash out at him.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t — don’t rush it for my sake.” Zuko wrapped his hands around Sokka’s wrists gently. “I’ve just been in my own head lately. It’s my problem.”</p><p class="p1">“Stop being a fucking martyr.” Zuko cracked a weak smile at that. “Look, I’ll tell my dad and Gran-Gran soon. If Katara hasn’t already let the cat-deer out of the bag.” Zuko chuckled, and Sokka’s chest warmed to see him perking up a little. “It’s not for your sake. I don’t really know why it’s taken me so long, honestly. Katara’s been nagging me to get around to it, too.”</p><p class="p1">“You should probably listen to your sister.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled Zuko in for another hug. “Yeah, I probably should.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sokka's getting around to it, okay?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. While You Were Dreaming</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Zuko tags along for a proper Southern Water Tribe fishing trip, and Sokka finally finds the right moment to talk to his father.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Finally got this chapter written! Sorry for the delay.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">“Sokka, are you almost ready?” Hakoda called from outside, exasperated.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah! Yeah, just, finishing up —” Sokka threw another pair of socks in his pack, <em>just in case my other socks get wet, nothing worse than ice cold wet socks</em>, tightened the drawstring, and slung it over his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">Zuko was standing nervously to the side, watching Hakoda make quick work of loading up, raising a hand and then lowering it again. He’d spent all evening the night before fretting to Sokka about the trip, about what he needed to pack, about whether he needed yet another set of underclothes.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, it’s only two nights,” Sokka had said, laying a hand on Zuko’s shoulder, but there wasn’t much even Sokka could do to stop Zuko from his endless worrying.</p><p class="p1">It wasn’t like Sokka was less worried — he was just a little better at hiding it, evidently. Taking his boyfriend on a fishing trip with his father, when said father did <em>not</em> know about said boyfriend? It was courting disaster.</p><p class="p1">Sokka couldn’t refuse, though, when Hakoda had asked so casually if Zuko had ever been fishing, and insisted that Zuko come along when he heard that — surprise, surprise — the pampered prince had never been on a proper Water Tribe fishing expedition. Zuko had protested, but there was no arguing with Hakoda once he set his mind to something.</p><p class="p1">So, there Zuko was, stepping gingerly into the canoe. The boat tilted below him, and Zuko nearly fell in with a yelp. Hakoda caught his arm, steadying Zuko with a booming laugh.</p><p class="p1">“Watch yourself, Lord Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko settled in, noticing Sokka with a grateful expression.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, you’re ready,” Zuko said, clutching the sides of the boat, feet planted firmly on the bottom. <em>He spent years on a ship, you’d think he could handle a little canoe.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka tossed his waterproof pack into the footwell and stepped carefully into his seat.</p><p class="p1">“Have fun!” Katara appeared at the edge of the ice, grinning with crossed arms. “Don’t let the Fire Lord drown.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m not gonna —” Zuko started, indignant.</p><p class="p1">“I won’t, Katara.” Hakoda said warmly, giving her a wave. “We’ll be back in a few days.”</p><p class="p1">With a paddle in Hakoda and Sokka’s hands — Zuko was not trusted with steering the canoe quite yet — the canoe slid through the polar water, and it wasn’t long before Sokka turned to see the town growing small in the distance.</p><p class="p1">The wind picked up the further they paddled, whipping through the maze of icebergs. They were silent, mostly, but for the rushing wind and the splash of their paddles. Quiet enough for Sokka to overthink.</p><p class="p1">It hadn’t <em>really </em>hit him until just then that he’d be spending two nights alone with his father and the boyfriend that his father definitely did not know about. <em>Should I tell him now? Or wait until after, when we’re not all sleeping in the same fucking tent? </em>He could so vividly imagine the excruciating awkwardness if his dad reacted poorly. Sokka didn’t think his dad would be <em>angry</em>, really, but… <em>Dad’s still so formal with Zuko. Gran-Gran tolerates him. Maybe I just need to give them more time to get to know him, know him like I do, before I drop the bomb. But what if Dad figures it out on this trip? We’ll be together the whole time… what if he’s upset that I wouldn't tell him? </em>Sokka could already feel his muscles settling into a permanent tension.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was seated at the back of the canoe, Zuko in between him and his father. Zuko was hunched, pulling the hood of his coat lower against the cold. The strokes of Hakoda’s paddle were smooth, relaxed; from what Sokka could tell, he had no idea that his son was working himself into knots.</p><p class="p1">“How you doin’ back there, son?” he called.</p><p class="p1">“Fine!” It came out more distressed than Sokka intended, so he cleared his throat and tried again. “Doin’ great.”</p><p class="p1">“Alright. Let’s head to the north floe field, I think we’ll run into less polar bear-dogs.”</p><p class="p1">“Polar bear-dogs?” Zuko asked.</p><p class="p1">“Hopefully we won’t run into any at all,” Hakoda continued, “they’re quite formidable, especially when you get between them and their dinner.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh.” The sound of Zuko’s voice was smothered by the wind.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda chuckled. “Don’t worry, Your Highness, between Sokka and I and your firebending, we’ll be just fine.”</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko was really quite impressed with the ease with which Sokka and Hakoda steered the canoe, slipping between ice floes like they knew exactly where which floe was going to drift next. Zuko knew the ins and outs of running a steam ship, but after his ill-advised excursion in the Northern Water Tribe, he’d discovered that steering a canoe was much harder than it looked.</p><p class="p1">They finally stopped at an icy outcropping, the front of the canoe bumping lightly against the shore. Hakoda was the first to step out, beckoning Zuko after him.</p><p class="p1">Zuko stood, too fast, tilting the canoe and stumbling. He almost fell, but grabbed the sides of the canoe just in time.</p><p class="p1">“Careful, there. Take it slow — wouldn’t want you to fall in and get frostbite.”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, Chief. Sir.” Zuko stood again, slow, stepping carefully over the seats of the canoe.</p><p class="p1">He gingerly took Hakoda’s hand to steady himself as he exited the canoe. Sokka clambered out shortly after, coming nowhere close to falling into the freezing arctic water. Zuko felt like a bumbling fawn.</p><p class="p1">The spit they’d stopped at jutted out into the water like a knife, covered in ice but for the rocky, pebbly shore their canoe had slid onto. The rocks and ice crunched under Zuko’s boots as they hauled the canoe up and out of the water. It slid easily once it was on the ice, and the three of them dragged it to a bank of ice and snow.</p><p class="p1">“Here’s as good a place as any to camp,” Hakoda said, leaning back and looking at the wall of ice that curved over them. It was the only crumb of shelter anywhere near them on the spit; the rest of their surroundings were flat and windswept, either low fields of snow or scattered ice floes.</p><p class="p1">Sokka started hauling supplies out of the canoe, so Zuko scrambled to help, taking a pack from Sokka’s hands.</p><p class="p1">“Wanna help me set up the tent?” Sokka asked, chuckling a little. Zuko stuttered a <em>sure</em>, and Sokka took the pack back from Zuko, setting it on the ground and unfurling masses of animal skins. “Why don’t you get the tentpoles? They’re in the bottom of the canoe.”</p><p class="p1">“Okay.” The long dowels were laid along the length of the canoe, and unwieldy when Zuko tried to pick them up all at once.</p><p class="p1">“Here.” Hakoda went to support the other end of the tentpoles, and Zuko felt embarrassment twinge in his gut. <em>He must think I’m useless. </em>Sure, Zuko had some useful skills, but he desperately wanted Hakoda to see that he wasn’t just some spoiled prince. Not even being able to set up a tent surely wasn’t helping his case.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda took over the erecting of the tentpoles. Sokka stood and brushed his snowy mittens off on the front of his pants, looking to Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“We need rocks to hold down the bottom of the skins.”</p><p class="p1">“There were some at the shore,” Zuko offered.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah. Come help me?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko nodded — <em>that much I can do</em> — and they turned away from their campsite. The wind picked up a little, sending whirls of snow across the spit. It rushed in his ears, enough to mask the lapping of the sea until he and Sokka were right at the shore again.</p><p class="p1">“You seem nervous,” Sokka said simply, bending and picking up a large rock.</p><p class="p1">“Well, yeah,” Zuko said, exasperated. “Of course I’m nervous. I want your dad to like me.”</p><p class="p1">“He likes you!” Sokka collected a few rocks in his arms, squatting.</p><p class="p1">Zuko crouched down to Sokka’s level, selecting a rock he guessed would have enough weight to hold their tent down.</p><p class="p1">“Sure, enough to have me around.”</p><p class="p1">“He just needs to get to know you better. Hence, why you’re here.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko grumbled, but let the subject drop. He didn’t want to spend the whole trip whining to Sokka, and if Sokka had noticed he seemed nervous, then Hakoda surely had, too. <em>I need to do a better job of faking it, I guess.</em></p><p class="p1">Once the tent was up, Hakoda hefted an intimidating pick and a type of spear Zuko had never seen before, and set out across the spit of ice. Sokka had one of those spears, too, so Zuko grabbed the third and followed after them.</p><p class="p1">He followed in silence for a few minutes before asking, “No fishing rods?”</p><p class="p1">“No, we’re ice fishing, Your Highness. This,” Hakoda said, lifting the pick, “is to cut a hole in the ice here.”</p><p class="p1">They’d apparently come to an appropriate spot, because Hakoda brought the pick over his shoulder and slammed it into the ice, chipping away until the ice broke through to the water underneath.</p><p class="p1">“Now, we bait them,” Hakoda said, dangling a fake fish into the water, “and wait.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko sat carefully on the ice and looked at his spear. It was like a very long, skinny fork, with three serrated prongs at the end. <em>Helps keep the fish you catch, probably. </em>He peered into the water where Hakoda was jiggling their lure. <em>Nothing yet. </em>Just dark blue water.</p><p class="p1">Sokka settled next to him, watching their fishing hole intently.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t suppose you’ve done anything like this before, Your Highness.”</p><p class="p1">“No, I haven’t. No one ever taught me anything like this.” Zuko caught Hakoda’s eyes and looked away quickly again, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze.</p><p class="p1">“That’s too bad. There’s not a lot of ice in the Fire Nation, but fishing’s a useful skill.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I had to try my best when my uncle and I were on our own. I wasn’t very good at it.”</p><p class="p1">“Your uncle didn’t know how?”</p><p class="p1">“Nope. He’s good at a lot of stuff, but surviving off the land isn’t one of his strengths. In fact, he almost killed himself trying to make a tea out of a poisonous flower.”</p><p class="p1">Hakoda laughed. “Now why would he do something like that? A poisonous flower doesn’t seem like it would be very tasty.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt a smile curl at his mouth hopefully. “He thought it was, like, this special tea flower or something. I don’t know. We were both disasters.”</p><p class="p1">“I think I see one!” Sokka said, hushed, and leaned over the fishing hole. His spear hovered in the air for a moment, and then he stabbed into the water, but came up empty-speared. “Damn.”</p><p class="p1">“You’ll get the next one, son.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure,” Sokka grumbled.</p><p class="p1">He did, though, and the next one, and Zuko tried his best a couple times but they always slipped away, darting back into the gloom. It was harder than it looked, and after those first few failures Zuko left the spearing to Sokka and Hakoda. No point in scaring off the fish with his ineptitude.</p><p class="p1">When the wind started howling louder and the sun hung low, they returned to the tent, a sack of fresh fish heavy on Zuko’s shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“I can take care of the fire,” Zuko said, and got one crackling at the mouth of their tent.</p><p class="p1">“Well, that’s useful,” Hakoda quipped, pulling a few fish out of the sack and setting them out on the ice to gut. “I guess you’ve never needed a flint?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko smiled, giving the fire a little more juice. With the sun setting, the cold was getting sharper. “It’s the one thing I’m good for, I guess.”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t worry about those fish, Your Highness. They’re slippery little fellas.” Hakoda gutted the fish deftly, short knife glinting.</p><p class="p1">“I think we should cook the fish this time, Dad.” Sokka was leaning the spears down into the canoe. “Zuko’s not <em>that </em>adventurous of an eater.”</p><p class="p1">“Sure.” Hakoda leaned and pulled a pan out of one of their packs.</p><p class="p1">“What?” Zuko looked to Sokka, confused. <em>I was down for the stewed pea prunes.</em></p><p class="p1">“Usually, when we catch the fish the same day, we eat it raw,” Hakoda explained, setting the pan to rest on the rocks jutting up from the fire.</p><p class="p1">Zuko looked at the fish, then at Sokka, then back at the fish.</p><p class="p1">“I wanna try it.”</p><p class="p1">“You don’t have to.” Sokka sat next to him by the fire, his face ringed in the fur trim of his hood.</p><p class="p1">“No, I want to. If that’s what you do when you’re on a Southern Water Tribe fishing trip, that’s what I want to do.”</p><p class="p1">“Atta boy,” Hakoda said warmly, and grinned, taking the pan off the fire. Zuko’s chest filled up, warming at the comment.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda sliced Zuko a filet and held it out to Zuko with a de-mittened hand. Zuko pulled one of his own mittens off, exposing his skin to the bitter cold, and took the near-frozen fish in his fingers. It was slippery, tender, pink, very much uncooked, but Zuko wanted to have his fill of everything that was important to Sokka, so he plopped the fish into his mouth and chewed. Sokka looked at him skeptically; before he swallowed, Zuko picked a fish bone out of his teeth.</p><p class="p1">“Well, it’s definitely a fish,” Zuko said, and Hakoda chuckled. Zuko thought for a moment. “I think I liked it.”</p><p class="p1">“We’ll make a fisherman out of you yet,” Hakoda said, and handed him another piece.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Sokka couldn’t get to sleep. Somehow, Zuko had passed out immediately upon slipping into his bedroll, and Sokka could hear his father’s soft snoring even over the rushing of the wind outside. Normally, the sound of the arctic around him was a perfect lullaby, but Sokka’s head was too full.</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Is this the moment? Dad and Zuko seem to be getting along really well. Or would bringing up the conversation just ruin the trip? Maybe this is the right moment. Tomorrow, when we get up. Maybe I should just wait until we get home. I should just wait until we get home.</em>
</p><p class="p1">Sokka wasn’t sure when his swirling thoughts let him sleep, but by the ache behind his eyes when he woke, it was late. He picked up his head a little, looking around the tent; Zuko was still snoring away, but his father’s bedroll was empty.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda was standing over the canoe, bundling up the previous day’s haul of fish. The sun was still low in the sky, throwing long morning shadows across the ice, catching the sparkling snow.</p><p class="p1">“Dad,” Sokka blurted. <em>I guess my mouth has decided this is the moment, huh.</em> “I’m.”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, Sokka?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused, then approached the canoe. <em>Katara said I should just rip it off, like a bandage.</em> “I’ve been wanting to tell you something for a while.”</p><p class="p1">“You know you can tell me anything.”</p><p class="p1">He looked into his father’s face. Sokka’s growth spurt over the last few years meant that he didn’t have to look up, anymore — at least not physically. Hakoda was still everything Sokka wanted to live up to: a good man, a good father, a good leader for their people.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I know.” Sokka took a breath. “It might be kind of, uhm. A surprise, though.”</p><p class="p1">Hakoda waited patiently, a silence that only served to make Sokka more rattled. <em>“Just get it over with.” Ugh, easy for Katara to say. </em></p><p class="p1">“I think I — well, I know — I’ve figured out, recently, kind of, like. It was a little while ago but I just didn’t feel like the time was right — I like men. Romantically.”</p><p class="p1">Hakoda’s hand went to his chin. “I see. Just men?”</p><p class="p1">“No, I don’t think so. Suki — Yue and Suki, I really did love them. I just, like men too, I guess.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm. Well,” Hakoda clapped a hand on Sokka’s shoulder. “Either way, I hope you find someone that makes you happy.”</p><p class="p1">“I have.” Sokka’s heart thudded in his chest, so hard he could feel it in his throat.</p><p class="p1">Hakoda raised a brow.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko. He makes me happy.”</p><p class="p1">Hakoda pressed his lips together, something pulling at the corners of his mouth. “The Fire Lord?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked away. “I know he’s the leader of the Fire Nation, but he isn’t that to me. He fought in the war with me, and he helped Aang, and he’s trying his best to fix things, and it just <em>happened</em> —”</p><p class="p1">“Does he make you happy?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka blinked. “Yeah. Really, really happy. I’m — I love him.”</p><p class="p1">“Then I’m happy.” Hakoda’s eyes were soft, skin crinkling at the edges.</p><p class="p1">Sokka let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, let his shoulders relax, let his fingers uncurl from fists he didn’t know he’d clenched.</p><p class="p1">“Really?” Sokka asked, and Hakoda shook his head, smiling. “I thought you’d be more, I don’t know. Taken aback?”</p><p class="p1">Hakoda barked a laugh that startled Sokka. “I had a few inklings.”</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, did Katara say something?”</p><p class="p1">“No, you did.” Hakoda was still chuckling.</p><p class="p1">“What?”</p><p class="p1">“You talk about him all the time. You’re pretty clear when you have a crush, you know. I thought maybe you two were just good friends, but… it all makes sense, now.” He patted Sokka’s shoulder and turned to the canoe again. “I suppose Zuko and I will have to have a little talk, won’t we?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka groaned. “He’s already scared enough of you as it is.”</p><p class="p1">“Me? He’s the Fire Lord!”</p><p class="p1">“He wants you to like him.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m teaching him to fish, aren’t I?” Hakoda joked. Sokka huffed, and Hakoda straightened with mischief in his smile. “Don’t worry, I won’t scare him off.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko chose that moment to duck through the door of the tent.</p><p class="p1">“Speak of the devil,” Hakoda said, and Sokka clapped a hand to his forehead.</p><p class="p1">“What?” Zuko’s eyes were still bleary, and he squinted against the morning sunlight.</p><p class="p1">“You’re finally awake! Come on, lovebirds, we have fish to catch.”</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">That night in his bedroll, after finally catching a fish for them to eat (even if it was only the one), after the relief and embarrassment of Hakoda’s jokes and teasing, when he was warm and insulated against the arctic night, Zuko dreamt of the cabin.</p><p class="p1">It was the familiar royal cabin up in the mountains west of Caldera City, but cloaked in snow the way he’d only seen it once before: that time his family had gotten snowed in, much to his father’s rage. In this dream, his father was nowhere to be found — the cabin was empty, devoid of servants or anyone he knew.</p><p class="p1">Zuko smelled something cooking, followed his nose into the kitchen, but it wasn’t the kitchen, it was Sokka’s house in the Southern Water Tribe, and he was making stewed sea prunes. Sokka turned, smiling, and then they were laying in that grassy clearing, staring at the stars — but it wasn’t the grassy clearing, it was an ice floe, and they both had their hoods up against the cold. Sokka’s eyes were sparkling, and he was holding Sokka’s hand, and he wanted to stay there forever.</p><p class="p1">A minister, his Minister of Trade, Chao, came paddling toward their floe in a canoe, babbling about missives to sign and disgruntled colonists, and then suddenly Zuko’s work came fluttering down from the sky above, sheet after sheet of paper burying him until only his face poked out.</p><p class="p1">He could see Sokka, but he was getting up, <em>he’s leaving, he’s angry at me, he has better things to do than deal with all this paper, </em>and in desperation Zuko set the pile of papers aflame, hoping to get back to looking at the stars with Sokka again. But Sokka just looked scared, and then he was gone, and Zuko was alone in the hall of portraits, the eyes of his forefathers leering over him.</p><p class="p1">Zuko didn’t tell Sokka about the dream. It was just a dream, after all.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Round of applause for Sokka finally getting his act together!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Sokka's Diary</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka starts thinking about the future.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Some spice ahead! Also, just fyi, some recreational drug use (the same weed from earlier).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">“Look, I’m a whale-walrus,” Aang said, two chopsticks poking out from his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Aang, come on,” Katara said, hiding a laugh with one hand.</p><p class="p1">“Respect the tusk, Katara,” Hakoda said, chopsticks in his mouth as well.</p><p class="p1">“Didn’t I teach you not to play with your food?” Kanna chided, without bite.</p><p class="p1">Zuko smiled, slurping up some of his seaweed noodles. The cookfire was warm, the noodles were steaming, Sokka was laughing next to him. Kanna smacked Hakoda’s arm lightly, but she was smiling, and Katara was laughing through a mouthful of noodles. Zuko was so happy, not a single care — he’d taken care of the day’s letters in the morning, and there was nothing to do but enjoy the meal that Katara had made them, and laugh at Aang’s jokes, and listen to Hakoda’s stories.</p><p class="p1">It was so nice, and then the thought smacked Zuko in the face: <em>I’ll never have this with my family.</em> He didn’t mean to think about it, but it made his nose prickle with the threat of tears. Zuko tried to push the thought down. <em>Why can’t I just enjoy dinner? </em>It was frustrating, the fact that his family could ruin this for him, even from thousands of miles away. <em>I’ll mope about that later. Just enjoy dinner, Zuko, like a normal person. Don’t make Sokka deal with your bullshit.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko noticed Sokka’s eyes flick to him, a gentle question on his face. He arched an eyebrow, so Zuko summoned up his best smile — but he knew it didn’t reach his eyes, and Sokka gave him a look. Zuko laid his hand on top of Sokka’s where it was resting on the ground between them, and gave it a soft squeeze, so Sokka let it go and turned back to his noodles, but he turned his hand so that he could squeeze Zuko’s back.</p><p class="p1">Zuko let Sokka keep their fingers laced together, even though he didn’t want to worry him. Zuko wanted to pretend like everything was totally fine, just brush Sokka’s concern off completely. If Zuko was being honest with himself, he also wanted — selfishly — to drag Sokka back to his house so that Sokka could kiss him and run his fingers through his hair and listen to Zuko complain, but Zuko wasn’t going to give in to that.</p><p class="p1">So Zuko allowed himself Sokka’s hand. Familiar, skin rough in places from working and fighting, comforting when Sokka rubbed circles onto Zuko’s palm with the pad of his thumb.</p><p class="p1"><em>Stop letting them get to you,</em> Zuko told himself, and tried to focus on Hakoda’s tale of hunting a great polar leopard with Bato. <em>You have Iroh, and Sokka, and Aang and Katara and Toph. And Suki. Stop feeling so sorry for yourself.</em></p><p class="p1">He forced those thoughts away, let Sokka hold his hand, and shoved more noodles into his mouth. Zuko remembered his dream, and wished that he could just stay holed up in the Southern Water Tribe forever, and forget that the Fire Nation even existed in the first place.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>My dearest Suki, most esteemed of all commanders,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>‘Sup? Sorry I haven’t written sooner, the construction has kept me way too busy. I’m glad everything’s going well back in the Fire Nation — I’m assuming no coups? Since you haven’t written Zuko in a while. How’s Ty Lee? I hope you took my advice and took her to that noodle place I told you about. The ambience is very romantic. Zuko’s a sucker for stuff like that.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Speaking of sparky, I told my family about him. Gran-Gran is still on the fence, but the other day I saw her and Zuko doing the laundry together, so I guess it’s fine? My dad reacted a lot better than I thought he would. In fact, I wish he would shut up about it a little more. There’s plenty of material to tease Katara and Aang about, I don’t know why he gives us such a hard time! And now Bato’s back in town, and he’s insufferable too.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I can’t really complain too much. Being here with him and my family is really nice. I think Zuko appreciates the vacation, and it feels good to have everyone in one place. Well, the only thing missing is you. And the rest of the gang. Why is it that we’re all running off to different places? We should all quit our jobs. </em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I miss you. I know you don’t like the cold very much, but Zuko’s a very good space heater. Will you come visit sometime? Maybe when the Fire Nation doesn’t have so many stuffy old ministers to keep an eye on? It’s not so bad here in the summers. I suppose Zuko will have to go back to the Fire Nation again soon, so I’ll see you then. I miss your sense of humor. I love Zuko, but he’s a little grumpy sometimes. </em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>May your eyeliner always be sharp,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Sokka</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“Hey, sparky?” Sokka called from the other room.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah?”</p><p class="p1">“What’s this?” Sokka appeared in the doorway, pushing back the hide curtain, a little wooden box in hand, a shit-eating grin on his face. <em>Damn it.</em></p><p class="p1">“Were you going through my stuff?” Zuko deflected, standing up.</p><p class="p1">“I… wanted to get you some warmer socks?” Sokka had that lying glint in his eye.</p><p class="p1">“You were snooping.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re the one who packed something that smells so <em>pungent</em>.”</p><p class="p1">It was the box of dama, and Zuko could kind of tell where Sokka was coming from, at least on that point. It <em>was</em> kind of smelly.</p><p class="p1">“I just thought, since you’re working so hard on the construction and everything…” Zuko said, moving to step into Sokka’s space and letting a hand fall just above his hip, “it would be nice to relax a little. I know it helped me.”</p><p class="p1">“I love you.” Sokka kissed him, grinning through it. “Come on, let’s put that firebending of yours to good use.”</p><p class="p1">They curled up on the floor, in a puddle of cushions and furs. The cookfire was still crackling softly, making hushed popping noises. Zuko snapped, a flame flickering at his thumb, and Sokka took the first hit from one of the little paper tubes.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, still rough,” Sokka said, coughing, reaching for his cup of water.</p><p class="p1">When Zuko took his turn, he felt the rasp of the smoke, but managed to keep a lid on the coughing by focusing a little harder on his breathing. He passed the tube back to Sokka, who raised a brow.</p><p class="p1">“You’re pretty good at that. Have you been smoking it without me?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko couldn’t hold back a guilty smile. “Maybe a little bit.”</p><p class="p1">“Sneaky!” Sokka opened his mouth in fake indignation.</p><p class="p1">“What, it really does help! I was stressed out.”</p><p class="p1">They passed it back and forth, ashing it into the firepit, and with each successive pass Zuko felt his muscles get heavier, and his world narrowed further and further until the only thing he could focus on was Sokka’s fingers brushing his. That, and the way Sokka’s mouth closed around the little roll of paper. Zuko knew he was staring, but — <em>now I can! I’m allowed now… </em>so he didn’t feel guilty. Sokka was his to stare at.</p><p class="p1">“Hm, I think I’m good for now,” Sokka said, and held it out to Zuko again, but Zuko shook his head.</p><p class="p1"><em>Ugh, feels weird when I shake my head. </em>“I’m good, too. Feeling a little, uh. Loopy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka stamped out the glowing red end on the stone of the fireplace, and unceremoniously dropped the remainder of the rolled paper back in the box. “Can smoke more later.”</p><p class="p1">“Maybeee,” Zuko sighed, fingers sinking into the furs, which were — so soft. Had they been this soft twenty minutes ago?</p><p class="p1">He flopped back, shifting to get comfortable.</p><p class="p1">“Ah, these are so warm.” Zuko knew he was being ridiculous, squirming around on the floor, but what was Sokka gonna do? Judge him? <em>I’d rather he just kiss me, </em>Zuko thought.</p><p class="p1">“C’mere, you little hotpot. I’m cold,” Sokka says, making grabby hands, so Zuko shimmied around to nuzzle his head into Sokka’s lap. “Mm, you’re cute. What did I do to get a cutie like you?”</p><p class="p1">“You took your shirt off while we were sparring,” Zuko said, muffled into the fabric of Sokka’s pants.</p><p class="p1">Sokka giggled, fingers combing through Zuko’s hair. “Really? That was all it took?”</p><p class="p1">“Kinda.”</p><p class="p1">The curling of Sokka’s fingernails against Zuko’s scalp felt even better than usual, sending little shivers of satisfaction running across Zuko’s skin. When his eyes fluttered shut, Sokka gave a sigh.</p><p class="p1">“Feels nice, huh.” Sokka’s voice was quiet, a little fuzzy around the consonants.</p><p class="p1">“Mmm, yeah.” Zuko pushed his cheek against Sokka’s leg. “You know, the last time we did this, all I could think about was kissing you.”</p><p class="p1">“Me, too,” Sokka said. Zuko opened his eyes, and Sokka leaned down, smiling crookedly. “And now I can kiss you all I want.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s lips were soft, warm, slow, but with his skin feeling all sensitive and his brain feeling all gooey, just that wet slide of Sokka’s lips was enough to have Zuko’s heart stuttering. It took him a moment to realize he was the one sighing into Sokka’s mouth — it was all a mess of tongues and breath.</p><p class="p1">Sokka made a little noise, right in the back of his throat, that made Zuko lean up and turn to press Sokka back into the furs. <em>Your skin is incredible, </em>Zuko thought, or maybe he said it — either way, he was pressing his mouth to Sokka’s neck, <em>his chest, his cheek, anything.</em> <em>All of it. </em></p><p class="p1">“Baby,” Sokka breathed, hands still in Zuko’s hair, fingers curling and uncurling.</p><p class="p1">“I loooove you,” Zuko said, between passes of his lips over the stubble at Sokka’s jaw. It was the only thought still coherent in Zuko’s head: <em>I love him, I love him.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hands found Zuko’s waist, and he pulled Zuko down so that their chests were flush together.</p><p class="p1">“You’re so warm,” Sokka said, arching his neck to afford Zuko more room to lay kisses on. “Like a cookstove. Or a boiler.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, I love you,” Zuko breathed again, and Sokka’s hips pushed up, body flexing against the solid weight of Zuko’s.</p><p class="p1">Zuko needed to get his hands on Sokka, as quickly as possible. He slid his palms up under Sokka’s shirt, relishing the way Sokka groaned. He wasn’t quite sure whose limb went where after that, but then Sokka was squirming back, pulling Zuko up to his feet. Zuko felt a little woozy, clasping Sokka’s forearm tightly, throwing an arm out to balance.</p><p class="p1">“Woah. Okay, there?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko melted into Sokka, wrapping his arms around Sokka’s shoulders. He leaned against Sokka, felt Sokka’s arms settle around his waist and hold him steady. “Yeah, just a little dizzy.”</p><p class="p1">“Let’s go to bed, yeah?” Sokka said, lips a hair’s breadth from Zuko’s.</p><p class="p1">Sokka put the fire out and led Zuko through the hide curtain, and Sokka’s fingers on Zuko’s skin burned. There was one little tallow lamp still lit, enough for Zuko to see Sokka by, to know where to put his mouth. Sokka laughed a little when they tumbled to the bed, limbs knocking together clumsily.</p><p class="p1">“You’re so eager,” Sokka said, settling over Zuko, legs slotting between legs.</p><p class="p1">“But you liiiike it,” Zuko sing-songed, grinning. “You wrote me those dirty letters. You liiiike it.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka flushed, but didnt back down. “Hm, I think I remember saying something along those lines. Did you learn to read them alone, finally?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko squirmed. “Yes. You almost got me in trouble. One of them was delivered during a meeting.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s face lit up. “Zuko, you read my letters during a <em>meeting</em>? Bad Fire Lord.” He nipped at Zuko’s neck, a soft brush of his teeth that made Zuko’s spine light up. A choked little moan leaked out of Zuko’s mouth, and Sokka knew he had Zuko right where he wanted him.</p><p class="p1">“Did you get a hard-on? I made you all hot and bothered during your big, important meeting, didn’t I?”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Yes,</em>” Zuko hissed, both in response to Sokka’s question and to Sokka’s tongue, brushing over the bitten skin.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck, you’re hot,” Sokka panted, hips tilting against Zuko’s. “Why are you so fucking hot. It’s not fair.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, I don’t know,” Zuko said, near-delirious. The dama had his muscles feeling trembly, in the best way, and his skin was hyper-sensitive to each breath of air and slick pass of Sokka’s tongue.</p><p class="p1">“’S not fair…” Sokka started kissing down his neck, then shifted down to press his lips to the skin just above his waistband.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, please.” He felt like he was going to spontaneously combust. <em>I’m a firebender, you never know.</em></p><p class="p1">“Stars, I love going down on you,” Sokka mumbled, pulling his trousers down, mouth hot on the skin of Zuko’s hip.</p><p class="p1">It was all Zuko could do to just lay there, and squirm, and whine, as Sokka nudged Zuko’s knees apart and kissed at his inner thigh, teasing him until the ache was near-unbearable. Zuko’s fingers twisted in the furs, and then one hand flew to Sokka’s cheek when he wrapped his lips around Zuko.</p><p class="p1">Zuko groaned, deep, <em>too loud, the neighbors</em> — and Sokka paused to say, “Yeah, baby, let me hear you,” before returning. <em>Sokka’s getting almost too good at this,</em> Zuko thought, hips rolling in response to the slide of Sokka’s tongue, his lips, the wet heat of his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Hunh, Sokka, slower… you’re gonna…” Zuko was out of breath already — it was too much. He didn’t want it to be over <em>that </em>quickly.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled away, wrapping his hand tight around Zuko’s slick length, and stroked slowly. “Already?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, already.” Zuko tried to focus on slowing his breathing.</p><p class="p1">“Hm, lemme get something.” Sokka pulled back, pushing Zuko’s hand out of the way when he moved to replace Sokka’s. “Be patient.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko flushed at the instruction, grabbing at the furs instead. Sokka shuffled around in a chest, until he produced a small pot. He opened the lid, dipping two fingers into a kind of clearish liquid, different than what they’d used before.</p><p class="p1">“Take your pants off, baby.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko scrambled to it, and Sokka laughed lightly, settling between Zuko’s bare legs. Zuko knew exactly where Sokka was going with those fingers, so he propped his knees up, looking at Sokka expectantly. Sokka paused, a glint in his eye.</p><p class="p1">“Tell me what you want,” Sokka drawled, brushing his fingers down Zuko’s length, watching him jolt under the light touch.</p><p class="p1">“Want you,” Zuko whined. “Want your fingers.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, demanding Fire Lord. That’s not a very polite way to ask for what you want. Why don’t you try again?”</p><p class="p1">“Please, Sokka,” the brush of his fingers so close, but not <em>quite </em>where Zuko wanted, was maddening, “can I have your fingers? Inside me?”</p><p class="p1">“There we go.” Sokka tucked a finger inside, just a little, and Zuko keened, hips tilting down to meet Sokka’s hand. Sokka moaned, working the first one in with ease. The second one came soon after, and then Sokka’s fingers were curling up and sending sparks skittering up Zuko’s body.</p><p class="p1">“There?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah,” Zuko groaned. It was electric, the dama in his muscles amplifying each movement of Sokka’s fingers.</p><p class="p1">He couldn’t manage to hold on to a single thought for very long; it was really all he could do to hold himself together, what with Sokka pressing a third finger in and pushing against that spot inside of him that dragged the most undignified whines out of his chest. Zuko knew he sounded ridiculous, lewd, half-wailing into the cold evening air, but Sokka seemed to love it, and he’d said he loved it, so Zuko didn’t care. Sokka was pressing harder into him, sighing and mouthing at Zuko’s thigh, sinking his teeth in when Zuko’s hips started pushing back onto Sokka’s hand of their own accord.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, holy shit, you’re… oh, spirits,” Sokka panted, and then the rest of whatever he said was muffled into Zuko’s skin.</p><p class="p1">Sokka bent down, took Zuko right into his mouth, and the feeling of his tongue made Zuko’s stomach jolt, felt that unmistakable yank in his pelvis. It was overwhelming, it made Zuko’s head spin, it was —</p><p class="p1">“’S too much, too much,” Zuko croaked, and Sokka pulled off, hand stilling inside of him. He looked so concerned, so Zuko quickly followed with, “Too good.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, okay.” Sokka kissed Zuko, right at the crease of Zuko’s thigh and hip. “Sorry, just got… excited.”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t say sorry.” Zuko shut his eyes, took some deep breaths. He felt blown apart, dizzy, like his whole body was trembling. Maybe it was. “It’s just a lot.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s fingers twisted in Zuko, wringing a moan out of him. The initial burn was long gone, leaving just heady pleasure.</p><p class="p1">“Can we…” Zuko swallowed, trying to focus on speaking even as Sokka’s hand started moving again, “can we go a little slower? I’m just… I don’t know.” His head felt floaty, his skin felt weird and tender, he was sure that if he stopped clutching the furs, he’d fly apart at the seams.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, baby.” Sokka eased his hand out, must have wiped it off on something outside of Zuko’s view, because then he was settling his weight between Zuko’s legs, face hovering just above Zuko’s.</p><p class="p1">It was hard to see much, just by the light of that tallow lamp, but it was all Zuko needed, because it threw a flickering light over Sokka’s face; <em>his beautiful face, he’s so nice to me, why is he so nice to me?</em> Zuko’s heart was pounding so hard in his chest it almost made him nauseous. <em>But like, nauseous in a good way? Stars, I feel weird.</em></p><p class="p1">“Hey,” Sokka said, blinking slowly, voice syrup-y. “How we doin’?”</p><p class="p1">“Good, so good,” Zuko breathed, hands coming up to cup Sokka’s face, and there, that was all he needed.</p><p class="p1">He hadn’t realized he’d been so tense, holding onto the furs so hard, until he had his hands on Sokka. That was the anchor he’d needed: his breath started coming easier, his heart started to slow. Sokka sighed, rolling his hips into Zuko’s lazily, playing with a strand of Zuko’s hair between his fingertips.</p><p class="p1">“It’s… intense, like this,” Zuko groaned, shuddering at the rub of Sokka’s trousers against his erection.</p><p class="p1">“Fuck, I know. It’s so — everything’s so much.” Sokka’s face twisted in arousal, brow furrowing, and <em>at least I’m not the only one that’s a little overwhelmed.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko pulled Sokka’s face down, kissing him as deep as he could, hands around the back of Sokka’s neck. Sokka broke the kiss to lick and suck at that sensitive spot, just below Zuko’s ear, right at the back of his jaw.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka…” Sokka responded with a small grunt, “I want you to fuck me. Please.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah? Feeling good now?”</p><p class="p1">“Mhmm. Want you inside of me.”</p><p class="p1">“Hnh, spirits. Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled back, resting on his knees, reaching for that little pot again. He slicked himself up, tucked a finger back inside Zuko, which had Zuko’s spine singing all over again. He felt his heart throw itself against his ribcage; he needed Sokka, needed him back close to him. Needed that anchor again. Zuko reached out and grabbed for Sokka’s free hand, the one resting on his thigh.</p><p class="p1">“Hey, still good?” Sokka’s eyes flicked up to Zuko at the contact.</p><p class="p1">“Mhmm.” Zuko nodded, swallowing, managing a reassuring smile. He just needed Sokka close to him as soon as possible, that was all.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pressed inside, and Zuko worried for a one insane moment that he really <em>was</em> burning, that he was going to hurt Sokka or something, <em>but that doesn’t make any sense, </em>and besides, Sokka was tensing and groaning and still going, so it must be fine. Sokka thrusted slowly, settling his hands on Zuko’s legs. It was consuming, the slide of him that became easy so quickly, and Zuko’s eyelids fluttered shut.</p><p class="p1">Sokka gave a thrust, harder, deeper, that punched a breath of fire right out of Zuko before he could keep it in. It curled out of Zuko’s mouth in a little puff, and Sokka garbled a moan.</p><p class="p1">“<em>Spirits,</em>” Sokka breathed, and Zuko tried to focus on his breathing again. It had gotten away from him, when he was lost in the feeling of Sokka moving inside of him.</p><p class="p1">“Sorry,” Zuko panted, and Sokka slowed a little.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t say sorry, that’s really — really fucking hot —” He bucked into Zuko again, and another small puff of flame escaped Zuko’s mouth.</p><p class="p1">It was amazing, it really was, but then Zuko realized his hands were tingling the way they do when he bends, and he was moaning through the flames curling out of his mouth, and he was terrified he was going to burn Sokka’s whole house down. Zuko let go of the furs — <em>Oh, thank the spirits I didn’t singe them </em>— and rubbed a hand over his face, gasping. He felt delirious, on fire, maybe he really was going to catch completely aflame, and the faster Sokka bucked into him the more he felt like he was going to fly apart at the seams.</p><p class="p1">“Slow — slower, please,” Zuko begged, and Sokka obliged. “Here, c’mere.” Zuko pulled at Sokka’s wrists.</p><p class="p1">Sokka leaned over, tilting his hips up, eyes fixed on Zuko’s face.</p><p class="p1">“Here I am,” Sokka breathed, setting a slow, languid pace that put Zuko in much less danger of accidentally committing arson.</p><p class="p1">“Don’t wanna — hm, fuck. Don’t wanna burn your house down,” Zuko said, trying to smile.</p><p class="p1">The dama was still swirling in his head, weighing his muscles down, setting his skin alight, and Sokka moving inside him was so good he thought he might pass out. Sokka hooked his arm around one of Zuko’s knees, pressing him back and open, tilting Zuko’s hips up for a better angle.</p><p class="p1">“That wouldn’t, uh, wouldn’t be good.” Sokka moved long, slow, deep, groaning into Zuko’s neck. “Stars, you feel so fucking good right now. You feel good all the time, but. Ah, shit.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko let his eyes shut against it, wrapped his arms around Sokka’s shoulders, let himself drift now that he had Sokka to hold onto. There was nothing, nothing at all outside of Sokka’s gasps and moans, his mouth on Zuko’s neck, the solid weight of him filling Zuko up and making him even dizzier than he thought he could be.</p><p class="p1">Sokka was murmuring something into Zuko’s ear, but he couldn’t quite concentrate on anything other than the warm puff of Sokka’s breath on his ear and the deep, curling pleasure in his pelvis. It was a familiar feeling, but like everything else, so much <em>more</em> than usual, and Zuko’s body was shuddering against Sokka like a tree in a windstorm.</p><p class="p1">“Shh, relax, I got you,” Sokka said, kissing Zuko’s jaw.</p><p class="p1">“I’m trying, I really am, just — really good —” Zuko said, but it was all just <em>so much, </em>and —</p><p class="p1">“I know.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko was so close, and Sokka had barely even <em>touched</em> his cock, but then Sokka nipped at Zuko’s ear, mouthed at his neck, dug his fingers into the back of Zuko’s knee, and Zuko felt something inside him tumble over the edge. It was different; like the crash of a wave on the beach, rather than the snap of a bowstring. His muscles tensed, then relaxed, trembling, and he felt himself leak, just a little, onto the skin of his stomach.</p><p class="p1">“Did you just — ?” Sokka gasped, fucking him through it, sinking a hand into Zuko’s hair.</p><p class="p1">Zuko gazed up at him, that beautiful, open face, looking down at him like <em>he </em>was the beautiful one, when Zuko knew it was the other way around.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I think so,” Zuko said, shakily, hands gripping the back of Sokka’s neck.</p><p class="p1">Sokka made a broken sound, a high moan, hips grinding into Zuko.</p><p class="p1">“You’re so… I can’t believe you.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko felt like liquid, warm, like something in him had loosened, and all he wanted was more of Sokka, so he asked for it. Sokka rutted into him, and now Zuko just wanted more, <em>more</em>, and Sokka’s pace just sent him spiraling towards that precipice again, instead of making him feel like he was falling apart. Sokka was holding him together.</p><p class="p1">“Feels so fucking good,” Zuko managed to say, through it all.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hand curled into Zuko’s hair, tugging at the roots, and that was all Zuko needed to come <em>again</em> — he didn’t know he could do that — another strange wash of warmth, and when he told Sokka what was happening, Sokka groaned and bucked up into him harder.</p><p class="p1">“Really? Fucking hell,” Sokka said, gritting his teeth.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, for you, Sokka, for you,” Zuko panted into Sokka’s ear, and then Sokka gave a weak moan and his hips stuttered. He slowed, finally stopping, hand loosening its grip in Zuko’s hair.</p><p class="p1">Sokka leaned up, breathing hard, carefully pulling out. Zuko thought he was maybe a puddle of a person, joints weak and achy from being held in one position for too long.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, stars, you — you’re still hard,” Sokka breathed, fingers brushing over Zuko, and just that hint of a touch made him feel like he’d gotten shot up with lightning.</p><p class="p1">Zuko whined, “I guess, yeah,” and then Sokka’s lips were around him and just like that, he was jerking up into Sokka’s mouth, coming with a broken cry that sounded more like a wounded animal than a man.</p><p class="p1">The rest of it was a haze, Sokka fumbling to clean them both up, helping Zuko pull his sleepclothes back on, letting Sokka tuck some furs around them. Sokka was saying things, something like “didn’t know that could happen, I love you, I feel like we need more blankets…” Zuko mumbled something into the furs, woozy and sleepy. The dama still dragged at his eyelids, but a little less so; he was more tired than delirious.</p><p class="p1">Sokka curled in, tucking his head against Zuko’s chest, nosing at his collarbone.</p><p class="p1">“Hey,” Zuko croaked, wrapping his arms around Sokka, pulling him tight. “Sorry for almost burning down your house.” Sokka gave a surprised giggle, muffling it in the fabric of Zuko’s shirt.</p><p class="p1">“It’s okay. My fault for getting you all worked up like that. Hm, you’re so warm.” Sokka snuggled closer, slipping a leg between Zuko’s, and Zuko pressed his face into Sokka’s hair. He smelled musky, like the furs, and a little like the soap Zuko had made with Kanna.</p><p class="p1">“It’s not your fault. You can’t help that you’re so hot.”</p><p class="p1">“Hey, you’re the one breathing <em>fire</em>.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted. “Shut up.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused, fiddling with the loose neckline of Zuko’s shirt. “Sorry you got… overwhelmed.”</p><p class="p1">“Don’t worry about it. You listened to me, so.” Zuko kissed at Sokka’s hairline.</p><p class="p1">“Of course. I love you.”</p><p class="p1">“Mhmm. Love you, too.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">The morning was dim, the light from the main room barely catching a few dust motes. Without windows, it was so easy to pretend that it was still nighttime, and Sokka’s eyelids hung low. He rolled over, squirming, turning back toward Zuko. His boyfriend had his face shoved into the furs, his long hair an absolute mess from the night before. The night before… it came back to Sokka slowly as he drifted awake, the memory of Zuko’s moaning and whining making his skin tingle.</p><p class="p1">But that was last night, and now Zuko was just breathing quietly, warm next to Sokka, and Sokka couldn’t believe how lucky he was. If he had his way, he’d make his bed Zuko’s permanent address, so he could wake up every morning and tease Zuko about his bedhead, and go to sleep every night with a sweet kiss and an <em>I love you.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka was going to make himself sick.</p><p class="p1"><em>I’m such a fucking sap,</em> he thought, reaching out to play with a strand of Zuko’s hair. <em>Honestly, I’m getting as bad as Katara, and she’s engaged, for crying out loud.</em> Sokka thought about that for a moment, chest getting tight. <em>Maybe I should be engaged, too.</em></p><p class="p1">It was terrifying, a little, to think that, but if he was being logical — something that was rare, when it came to how he felt about Zuko — it made sense, at least to Sokka. <em>Does Zuko feel the same way? I know he loves me, but. Marriage is. We haven’t even been together for a year. I’m crazy for thinking about this. I’m crazy, right? But, we love each other. We work well together. I want to have him in my life forever. Isn’t that what marriage is for?</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka thought about seeing Zuko in full wedding regalia and his stomach flipped. <em>Okay, but, think about it for a second, Sokka. He’s the Fire Lord. Would I quit my ambassador job? The Fire Nation still has a ways to go when it comes to people like us. Maybe Zuko wouldn’t want to change anything, make things more complicated. I could be happy, just having him to myself.</em></p><p class="p1">Then again, could Sokka be happy like that? Maybe. Was the pomp and circumstance really all that important to him, as long as Sokka knew Zuko was his, as long as his friends and family knew, too? <em>What if the ministers try to marry Zuko off? He’s got a royal line to think about. </em>Watching him put on a farce with someone else… that was a step too far. <em>I wish all the royal bullshit wasn’t a thing. Ugh, why can’t someone else be the Fire Lord?</em></p><p class="p1">And if they did go public, officially… <em>Would I spend all my time in the Fire Nation? Zuko wants to do a good job as a ruler, and that takes time. Would we split our time? Maybe that could work. Or maybe it would make us resent each other. If we broke up… I’d die, probably.</em> That was a non-starter. They weren’t going to break up, Sokka was going to make sure of that.</p><p class="p1">Sokka watched Zuko shift, huffing, and reached out to cup Zuko’s face, even though he knew it would wake Zuko up. His eyelids fluttered, and Sokka kissed his cheek.</p><p class="p1">“Morning, sleepyhead.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko groaned, shoving his face into the furs. “It’s morning?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka chuckled and gave his cheek another kiss. “Yes, unfortunately.”</p><p class="p1">Another groan, but Zuko caught Sokka’s lips for a lazy kiss.</p><p class="p1">“Urgh, you have morning breath,” Sokka complained.</p><p class="p1">“So do you. Can we just stay in bed today?”</p><p class="p1">“As much as I’d like to, I think we both have work to do.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko grumbled, but leaned up, and they both started getting ready: Sokka pulling his wolftail back, Zuko brushing a comb through his hair, both pulling on their clothes. Shrugging his shirt on, Sokka turned to see Zuko massaging his scar, a jar of thick green lotion in his free hand.</p><p class="p1">Sokka frowned. “Something wrong?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s eyes flicked over to Sokka, but he just shrugged. “It’s the cold. It gets a little chapped sometimes, it’s not a big deal.” Zuko’s eyes flicked away again.</p><p class="p1">Sokka approached Zuko where he was seated, cross-legged on the floor, and knelt behind his back, wrapping his arms around Zuko’s shoulders. He didn’t say anything, just rested his chin on top of Zuko’s head. He didn’t want to make it a big deal if Zuko didn’t want it to be, but Sokka knew that look in Zuko’s eye.</p><p class="p1">“I kind of forgot it happened,” Zuko said. “I didn’t really take care of it when I was younger, on the ship, but Katara said this lotion was really moisturizing or whatever, so.”</p><p class="p1">“Can I?” Sokka asked lightly, hand touching the jar of lotion.</p><p class="p1">Zuko stopped and nodded, so Sokka shifted around to sit in front of Zuko. He dipped his fingers into the lotion — it was gooey, and smelled a little like seaweed. Sokka smeared some carefully at the edge of Zuko’s scar.</p><p class="p1">“You don’t have to be so gentle. It’s scar tissue, I can barely feel anything.” Zuko had that prickly tone in his voice.</p><p class="p1">Sokka gave Zuko a look. “I’m not babying you, I’m just being nice. Can’t I be nice to my boyfriend?”</p><p class="p1">“Yes,” Zuko said, sourly.</p><p class="p1">Zuko let him work, massaging lotion into the dry patches slowly. Zuko was funny about his scar; years ago, it had been off-limits to most anyone, like it was still a fresh wound, and then he’d gone straight to pretending that he didn’t care about it at all. He’d started joking about it a lot, in a tight, tense way that betrayed how much it still hurt him to think about.</p><p class="p1">“I used to hate it. Well, you know that. It still bothers me sometimes, but — I guess it’s, like a part of me. Or whatever. If I’d never been banished, I’d probably be even more messed up than I am.” Zuko laughed dryly. “I’d be Azula.”</p><p class="p1">“How’s she doing these days?” Sokka asked gently.</p><p class="p1">“Hm, better. I think moving her last year was a good idea. The other place wasn’t really helping her at all. She’s actually starting to buy into it, now. She’s trying.” Zuko paused. “She still won’t see me. And — I’m not gonna force her to. Y’know.”</p><p class="p1">“She’ll come around.”</p><p class="p1">“Maybe.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka worked lotion into the last of the dry patches. “There. Feel better?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, Katara was right about this stuff.” Zuko’s fingers brushed the edge of his scar. “You know, it’s useful for something. Makes me look intimidating in meetings, I guess.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka leaned forward, hovering in front of Zuko’s face. “You’re intimidating in meetings because you’re so good at your job. And because of that Fire Lord voice of yours.” He gave Zuko a peck. “You know what I think of your looks.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko gave a small smile, tilting his head. “No, I don’t.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka grinned, rolling his eyes. <em>Fishing for compliments. Well-deserved compliments, but still. </em>“Yes, you do,” he sing-songed, pecking Zuko again. “You’re the hottest man I’ve ever seen.”</p><p class="p1">“That can’t be true. There are a lot of men out there.” Zuko’s voice was soft, and his hands reached forward to pull Sokka into his lap.</p><p class="p1">Sokka settled there, holding Zuko’s face in his hands and looking down at him. He brushed his thumbs over Zuko’s cheeks, taking a moment to admire.</p><p class="p1">“That’s right, there are a lot of men out there. And somehow, I bagged the sexiest one.” Sokka kissed his forehead. “You’ve seen how the girls go wild for you. Even Suki wouldn’t let me keep you entirely to myself.” Zuko laughed a little at that. “Are you telling me you think we have bad taste?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko tried to tilt his face down into Sokka’s chest, but Sokka’s hands at his jaw wouldn’t let him. “No, I don’t think you guys have bad taste.”</p><p class="p1">“Then you just have to face it.” Sokka kissed the tip of Zuko’s nose. “I hate to break it to you, but you’re gorgeous.” <em>And mine.</em></p><p class="p1">Zuko was blushing furiously now, and Sokka loved that he could still make Zuko do that.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>To the great Suki, feared among warriors, loved across the world,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I need your advice, O Wise One. I’ve been thinking about where Zuko and I are going. Even Gran-Gran is warming up to him, and with Aang and Katara planning their wedding, I’ve been thinking about what marriage would mean for us, or if it’s even possible.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>You’ve been around those aristocrats for a while. Do you think we could make it work? I don’t need a wedding to know that Zuko loves me, but it sure would be nice to get to have a big celebration like Aang and Katara get. They get to have fun music and wedding gifts and tasty appetizers, so why shouldn’t I? I want to be with him for the rest of my life, but he’s the Fire Lord, so it’s complicated. Tell me what to do, please?</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Also, please don’t tell Zuko I’ve been thinking about this. I haven’t brought it up yet, I’ve just been doing a lot of thinking. I think you’d probably tell me I’m overthinking this. I don’t want to bring it up until I’m sure of what I want to say.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I’m not sure what I’m more afraid of: that he won’t want to get married ever, or that he will. Then I’d have to figure out how to propose! A whole new thing to overthink. You’ll probably get a lot more letters after this. </em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Enough about me. It’s so exciting that you and Ty Lee are official now! I’m really happy for you. You deserve the world. Keep me posted.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Your best friend,</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Sokka</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Starting to get into the home stretch now!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. To All the Fish I've Gutted Before</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sokka and Zuko spend some quality time discussing their future, but the road to romantic bliss is paved with miscommunication.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Some fluff, some bickering. Aang getting ahead of himself. Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">Sokka was insufferable. All the time really, but especially at that moment, mostly because he was sick, and Sokka was acting it was the end of the world.</p><p class="p1">“I’m dying, Katara.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re not dying, Sokka. You have a cold.”</p><p class="p1">“Please, save me,” Sokka croaked, reaching a trembling hand up to cup her face.</p><p class="p1">Katara batted it away, rolling her eyes. “You’re so dramatic. Just stay in bed, get some rest, and you’ll be fine.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka moaned and twisted to the side, pouting. <em>What a drama queen.</em></p><p class="p1">“I don’t understand why you can’t just hit me with more of that magic water.”</p><p class="p1">“There’s only so much it can do for colds. I brought your fever down, but your body has to do the rest of the fighting.”</p><p class="p1">He gave a wan smile and sniffled. “I’m a warrior.” Sokka’s face lit up, as much as it could with a clogged nose and watery eyes. “Baby!”</p><p class="p1">Katara turned to see Zuko standing at the curtain, a bowl of something steaming in his hands.</p><p class="p1">“I brought you soup,” he said, brow furrowed.</p><p class="p1">Katara stood, hands on her hips. “Thanks, Zuko. That’ll be great for his sore thr—” She was cut off by Zuko brushing right past her, kneeling at Sokka’s bedside. She raised a brow.</p><p class="p1">“Are you feeling better?” Zuko asked worriedly, shifting Sokka to a sitting position like he was made of porcelain.</p><p class="p1">Sokka coughed, pathetic. “A little.”</p><p class="p1">Katara rolled her eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry,” Zuko was cooing, fussing with Sokka’s blankets and pillows, bending a little more heat into Sokka’s bowl of soup. It was revolting, the saccharine tone to Zuko’s voice that Katara had never before had the misfortune to hear; Sokka ate it up, looking blearily at him like he was the best healer the world had ever seen. <em>Some appreciation I get.</em></p><p class="p1">“Do you need anything else?” he asked, hushed, kissing Sokka’s knuckles. <em>Dear spirits, they’re disgusting.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka thought for a moment. “Maybe some tea?”</p><p class="p1">“Of course. I’ll be right back,” Zuko said, peppering kisses on Sokka’s forehead and disappearing through the hide curtain again.</p><p class="p1">Katara leveled a look at Sokka. “Is that really necessary.”</p><p class="p1">“Come on, don’t act like you and Aang aren’t just as gross.” Sokka blew on his soup and took a sip.</p><p class="p1">“I know for a <em>fact</em> we are not that gross.” She shook her head, sighing. “He really loves you, you know.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka watched the curtain with sleepy eyes. “I know. Isn’t he dreamy? My prince.” </p><p class="p1">Katara made a performative gagging noise.</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko had his letters spread out in front of him on the furs and the side table next to him. Not exactly the workspace he was used to, but it did just fine. It was much more comfortable to read them by the fire, anyway. He liked to leave his personal letters for last; it provided a little more motivation to slog through his ministers’ notes and write his memos with the promise of his friends at the end of it.</p><p class="p1">More agricultural management, the slow grind of extracting their colonial presence, the incessant complaining from Minister Chao no matter what he did — finally, finally Zuko scrawled off the last letter he needed to send that day, and got to dig in to what he was actually interested in.</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>Zuzu!</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I know you don’t like that nickname but could you make an exception for me? Fire Lord Zuko is too formal. Maybe I need to make up a new nickname for you. I hope you’re taking good care of your aura for me! </em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko wondered absently what color Ty Lee would tell him it is right now. <em>Probably blue, like Sokka’s eyes. </em></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <em>The Southern Water Tribe sounds really cold. Brr. I’ve never been somewhere that snowy! Suki says its freezing all the time. Do you have any recommendations for packing for when we come down there? Oh my gosh, the other day Suki bought me the prettiest flowers, pink orchids. </em>
  <span class="s1">♡</span>
  
  <em>She’s the sweetest. You should buy Sokka some flowers! Hm, do they have flowers there? Maybe it’s too cold. That’s kind of a bummer, don’t you think? I’ll try to bring some for you.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>I’m excited to see you again! The wedding can’t come soon enough, from what Katara wrote me it’s going to be so beautiful.</em>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>See you soon! </em>
  <span class="s3">
    <em>☺</em>
  </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Ty Lee</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko smiled to himself. He didn’t think he’d miss Ty Lee’s bubbly presence quite so much. The letter he wrote back was short — he <em>would</em> see her soon — but he included a list of essential items for her trip: <em>fur-lined coat, extra socks, no crop tops. I know, lame. As many layers as you can find. </em>Surely Katara would be able to fill in any gaps in his list.</p><p class="p1">“Zukooo.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka had appeared from the bedroom, and was trudging over with his fluffiest polar leopard skin slung over his shoulders. Zuko’s calligraphy brush paused.</p><p class="p1">“Hmm? Need some more tea?”</p><p class="p1">“Nooo. Just you.” Sokka tumbled down, loose-limbed as a puppy, sniffling. “Be my hot water bottle? Pleeeease?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorted, picking the ink brick up and out of the reach of Sokka’s pawing hands. He thought about chastising Sokka for a moment, but his nose was red and his eyes were big and blue and beautiful.</p><p class="p1">“Sure.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka made a hum of contentment, wriggling into Zuko’s side. He slid his arms under Sokka’s fur, wrapping them close for maximum heat transfer. Zuko focused, bending just a smidgen of heat into Sokka’s skin.</p><p class="p1">Sokka moaned and leaned his head onto Zuko’s shoulder. “Ooh. That’s nice.”</p><p class="p1">“Feeling any better?” Zuko asked softly into Sokka’s hair.</p><p class="p1">“Ugh, no. This stuffy nose won’t go away.”</p><p class="p1">“Mm, I’m sorry.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko let the comfortable quiet between them drag on for a while; he was happy to rub warmed palms on Sokka’s sides, listen to Sokka’s breathing, press a kiss to Sokka’s feverish skin. He’d be content to stay that way forever, curled up together. The Southern Water Tribe might be freezing, but he was the warmest he’d ever been. Zuko kissed Sokka’s forehead again, and then the words were tumbling out of his mouth before he could really think too hard about them:</p><p class="p1">“I think I could do this forever.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s eyes blinked open. “Like, forever forever?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko took a breath, thought about the daydreams he didn’t let himself have. “Yeah. I think so.” He worried his bottom lip between his teeth. “Like. I’m really happy, with you.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m happy with you, too.” The words came out of Sokka with muffled, congested consonants.</p><p class="p1">“Um, and with your family.” Zuko paused again, and Sokka let him. “They’ve been so kind to me. More than I expected, or really deserved, and — I’m like, sleeping better. Here. With you. You’re good for me. You tell me when I’m being unreasonable, and you love me anyways.” <em>If I’m not careful, I’m going to start tearing up. </em>“I just. Wanted you to know. That I love you.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka hiccuped a laugh. “I know that you love me.” His voice went soft, and he ducked his head to hide his words into Zuko’s shoulder. “You think we could do this? Forever?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko just squeezed Sokka’s hand, and Sokka squeezed it back.</p><p class="p1"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Katara made a big fuss about it, but Sokka was determined to get back to work as soon as physically possible. They were down to the finishing touches, he couldn’t let someone else do that! So, although the stuffy nose still irked him, Sokka dragged himself out of bed and into the light of day to oversee the last of the waterbenders’ work.</p><p class="p1">Still, as much as Sokka pushed himself to remain upright, he was not at peak performance. <em>It’s a good thing they don’t need much hand-holding.</em> The benders were doing the fine carving work, quietly swirling patterns and murals into the ice of the main hall. It was soothing, listening to the tinkle of ice crystals being bent in and out of being. The soft whooshing of the polar breeze coming in through the front door…</p><p class="p1">“Sokka? Sokka!”</p><p class="p1">“Hm, what?”</p><p class="p1">It was Kevruk, sitting cross-legged on a step. “How’s this for a banister?” he beamed, throwing his arms out. The posts glittered.</p><p class="p1">“Looking stellar!” Sokka called. “No notes.”</p><p class="p1">He looked down at his checklist and tallied off one of the little boxes: ☑ mezzanine banisters. <em>They’ll look great for Katara’s wedding. I wonder if Aang will steal her, or she’ll steal Aang… </em>Sokka couldn’t imagine Katara letting anyone throw her onto a sled, not even Aang. Katara hadn’t mentioned that particular detail; everything Sokka had heard had been related to music, or food, or sending letters to all their friends.</p><p class="p1"><em>I think I could probably steal Zuko. I’m taller than him, now.</em> Sokka smiled dreamily, imagining Zuko’s surprise, throwing Zuko over his shoulder and taking him home. He’d always known he’d do that, one day; he’d never expected it would be Zuko, of all people.</p><p class="p1"><em>Not sure how Katara plans to incorporate Aang’s incense and flowers into the whole sled thing. Maybe they’re not even doing that at all? </em>In all honestly, Sokka had trouble paying attention to Katara’s prattling when Zuko was <em>right there</em> all the time, with pink cheeks begging to be kissed.</p><p class="p1"><em>Zuko… he’d probably have to have a big Fire Nation wedding, huh. </em>Sokka didn’t want to think about all the stuffy aristocrats they’d have to invite… the thought of Zuko in full wedding regalia <em>was</em> enticing, though. All red brocade, jewel-encrusted — <em>I’ll have to find some way to get him to wear that when I steal him…</em></p><p class="p1">“Sokka! Spirits, can you even hear me?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka jumped. “Yep! Yeah, I can hear you. Sorry.”</p><p class="p1">“Can you come over here? I can’t tell whether this looks more like a bear or a fish.”</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">The curved, barbed blade slipped through the fish easily. Zuko curled his fingers into the belly, scooping out the entrails as careful as he could; he looked closer and pulled out the kidney.</p><p class="p1">“I think I’m getting pretty okay at this,” he said, pleased with his now gut-less fish.</p><p class="p1">Sokka paused and peeked over. “Yeah, I think you are,” he smiled.</p><p class="p1">Zuko grinned under the praise, turning his attention back to the fish. Time to fillet.</p><p class="p1">“Um,” Sokka started, then clamped his mouth shut again.</p><p class="p1">Zuko frowns. “What, did I mess it up?”</p><p class="p1">“No, no, the fish looks good. I was just, uh. Thinking.”</p><p class="p1">Back to filleting. “Hm? What about?”</p><p class="p1">“You said, the other day, that you think… you think you could do this forever.” Zuko could hear the apprehension in Sokka’s voice. “I just wanted to know what you meant by that, exactly.”</p><p class="p1">“Well.” He focused on the fish, determined not to fillet his thumb on accident. “I guess I just meant that I don’t really want… anyone else. Ever, I think. Like, you’re it, for me.” Even though he’d told Sokka a million times over how desperately in love he was, this admission felt secret, vulnerable. “I don’t know, maybe it’s too soon to say something like that. I don’t want you to feel like I’m — I don’t know. You don’t need to feel the same way, yet.” The fillets were done, so Zuko just stared that them.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko.” Sokka’s hand entered his field of vision, cold fingers touching Zuko’s knuckles. “Duckie.” He looked up at that, to Sokka’s watery eyes. “I do feel the same way.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah? You’re not just saying that because I said it? Because, I promise it would be okay, we haven’t been together very long, and —”</p><p class="p1">“I mean it.” Their hands were both slick with fish innards, but that was the last thing on Zuko’s mind. “I think you’re it for me, too.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, and Sokka laughed, so Zuko laughed a little, too.</p><p class="p1">“So… do you think it’s time to tell people?” Sokka asked, haltingly. Zuko gave him a confused look. “Like, not just our friends.”</p><p class="p1">The memory of the loyalist’s spit landing at his feet flashed in Zuko’s mind. <em>Fire Lord Cocksucker!</em> “…I don’t know.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s hand retreated, and his face pinched up in that way that Zuko hated, because it meant Sokka was upset and trying not to show it. “What do you mean you don’t know? I thought — you said —”</p><p class="p1">“I know, I’m just —” Sokka snapped his mouth shut when Zuko interrupted, and Zuko winced. “I worry about — you.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka threw his fishy hands up in the air. “What the hell are you worried about me for? I’m all in, just like you.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko knew he could weather the vitriol and the name-calling just fine. What was one more name in the long list of epithets that had been hurled at him? <em>Family disgrace, traitor, pervert. </em>The thought of someone spitting at Sokka — it made Zuko angry in a way he hadn’t been in years, a vindictive kind of rage.</p><p class="p1">“If I… announce it, that I’m with you, that’ll only create problems for you,” Zuko explained, trying to keep his voice calm and reasonable. The frustration bubbling up inside of him would only spell trouble.</p><p class="p1">“Problems.”</p><p class="p1">“You saw what happened at the anniversary.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka rolled his eyes. “I can handle that. It’s not a big deal.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko grit his teeth. “Yes, it is. When it’s not just at the anniversaries, but in meetings, and dinners, and —”</p><p class="p1">“It’ll be fine —”</p><p class="p1">“It’s not fine to me!” Zuko snapped, and Sokka looked like he had just bit him. Zuko huffed, clenching his fists. “Look, I just don’t want to see you have to deal with it. Things have been getting better since the war, a little, but you didn’t grow up there. People aren’t just going to magically be okay with it, and I don’t want them to take it out on you.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m not a porcelain fucking doll.” Sokka’s voice was sharper than the gutting knives. “You think I <em>like</em> watching you have to deal with it?”</p><p class="p1">“That’s not what I’m saying.”</p><p class="p1">“The gatorcat’s out of the bag, Zuko. Our friends and family, everyone here knows. It’s pretty much common knowledge back in the Fire Nation, at this point. What is there to lose?”</p><p class="p1">“It’s <em>different.</em> Making a statement like that —”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, so it’s fine to keep me as your fucking — fucking sidepiece, but not be with me openly?” Sokka’s voice raised a little, and Zuko struggled not to rise to meet it.</p><p class="p1">“Would you stop twisting my words?” Zuko grit out, digging his fingernails into his hands. He <em>knew</em> why it made Sokka so upset, but —</p><p class="p1">Sokka scoffed. “Don’t act like I’m the bad guy, here.”</p><p class="p1">“So <em>I’m</em> the bad guy, then?” Zuko hissed. “Is that it?”</p><p class="p1">“You’re the one telling me you want to be with me forever, and then saying you’re not even willing to tell people about me!” Sokka’s hands were flying around angrily. “What’s your plan, here? Like, am I just supposed to be an open secret? I’ll just watch on the sidelines while you get married off to some…” Sokka stammered, casting around for the words. “Some, fucking, I don’t know, fertile aristocrat? ‘Cause that’s a thing, Zuko. Your <em>royal line</em>.” The last two words dripped with disdain, bracketed by Sokka’s fingers scratching air-quotes.</p><p class="p1">Zuko sputtered around his irritation. “That’s — that’s not even a concern right now, Sokka. It’s — what aristocrat? That’s not even —”</p><p class="p1">“It’s gonna be a concern at some point! Between now and forever.” Sokka stood and huffed. “I can’t — I’m gonna go. I’ve got to get these fish to Dad.” He scooped up his own fillets and Zuko’s, turning sharply.</p><p class="p1">Zuko reached after him, calling his name, but Sokka was stomping through the snow with his shoulders hunched.</p><p class="p1">
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">The hall came out perfectly, if he did say so himself, but Sokka couldn’t enjoy it — not when Zuko’s tight voice was still ringing in his ears.</p><p class="p1">“This is great! Plenty of room for all our friends.” Aang elbowed Sokka’s side, a wide grin on his face. “I guess you’ll have to teach Zuko how to dance, huh?”</p><p class="p1">“Sure,” Sokka said flatly, pressing his lips together.</p><p class="p1">Aang frowned. “Woah. Did something happen? Talk to me, bud.”</p><p class="p1">“No, nothing —” He sighed. “Yeah. Zuko and I got into a fight.”</p><p class="p1">A gasp. “Really? Your first fight.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka rubbed at his temples. “He just — he thinks I can’t handle it if we go public. Like, full Fire Lord-y <em>I’m officially courting this very male man</em> public.”</p><p class="p1">“He said that?” Sokka could <em>feel </em>Aang gearing up to put on his wisest monk voice.</p><p class="p1">“Well. Not exactly.”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, to resolve this you need to fully listen to the words he’s saying.” <em>There it is. Monk voice.</em> “He loves you, and just wants the best for you, even if he might be a little misguided.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka heaved a sigh. “Okay, but — he’s being stupid. I love him, he loves me, why shouldn’t we get married?” <em>Shit. Oops.</em></p><p class="p1">Aang’s eyes lit up. “<em>Married?</em> I thought you were just talking about going public.”</p><p class="p1">“Fuck, shh. Yes, we were just talking about going public. I haven’t told him — forget you heard that.”</p><p class="p1">“You want to get married?” Aang rubbed his hands together gleefully. “How are you gonna propose? Betrothal necklace?” He stopped, tapping a finger on his chin. “Wait, that’s just a Northern thing, right?”</p><p class="p1">“<em>Shh!</em> I haven’t made any plans, alright?” Sokka slung an arm around Aang’s shoulders, steering them out of the very open, very echoey hall and into a side hall. “I’ve just been thinking about it, what with you and Katara…”</p><p class="p1">Aang gasped. “Let’s do a double wedding! Best buds getting married together!”</p><p class="p1">“No.” Aang’s face fell. “First of all, I think Katara would super bloodbend-murder me if I hijacked her wedding, and second of all, I just had a huge fight with Zuko about even <em>telling</em> people back in the Fire Nation, so something tells me he wouldn’t say yes.”</p><p class="p1">“Aw, okay. Well, I’m sure Zuko will come around.”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah.” Sokka pouted. “We haven’t talked since yesterday. He was all quiet at dinner, and then he just went straight to bed. Early.”</p><p class="p1">Aang winced. “That bad, huh?”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t think either of us are very good at de-escalation.” Sokka rubbed a mittened hand over his face. “I’d better go see if he’s at home.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Spoiler alert, there will be no betrothal necklaces in this fic. If you love that trope, my apologies, but I'll be doing it a little different.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Wedding Crashers</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Aang and Katara get married.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ahhh sorry for the wait dear readers! I just started a new job and work has been bonkers with getting settled in and everything, but I'm back with an update finally. Thanks so much for being patient with me.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1"><em>The Southern Water Tribe. </em>Suki shivered. <em>Just as cold as I remembered.</em></p>
<p class="p1">The docks were new, though — she noticed the additions as they pulled in and disembarked, Ty Lee tucked into her side for warmth.</p>
<p class="p1">“Wow, Zuko wasn’t kidding. I really did need all my layers!”</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee’s cheeks were pink with wind, so flushed Suki could kiss them. She did, and Ty Lee batted her away, laughing.</p>
<p class="p1">“Stop, stop,” she giggled, and Suki obeyed — with a final kiss snuck in, planted right on the tip of her nose.</p>
<p class="p1">The ship lurched into port, and sailors shouted around them, ropes flying. They didn’t pay Suki and Ty Lee much mind; they’d paid their passage on a merchant’s ship that was on its way to the Southern Water Tribe anyway, so the seamen had better things to do than watch the two women gather up their luggage and trudge down the gangplank.</p>
<p class="p1">Suki was bundled in a mess of furry parka before she quite knew what was happening.</p>
<p class="p1">“Suki!” Sokka crowed, a trademark greeting. His face was bright, open, ringed with white fur.</p>
<p class="p1">She squeezed him back as hard as she could. “Sokka. It’s so good to see you again.”</p>
<p class="p1">He pulled back, grinning, a hand on either one of her shoulders, and then seemed to notice Ty Lee very suddenly when his hands jolted down to his sides.</p>
<p class="p1">“Heyy, Ty Lee —” he started in a stilted voice, and was cut off by Ty Lee throwing herself into a hug as well.</p>
<p class="p1">She rubbed his head, mussing his hair. “Hey, cutie. Where can I get one of these parkas you’ve got? I’m freezing.”</p>
<p class="p1">Suki covered a laugh at the way Sokka’s face went pink. “Oh! Uh. I’m sure we can find you a spare.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Where’s the Fire Lord?” Suki asked, leaning up on her toes to peer behind Sokka.</p>
<p class="p1">He pulled a face. “What, I’m not enough?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Oh, don’t be sour. Just thought he’d be around — you two were joined at the hip when you were last in Caldera City. Did you get tired of each other already?” she teased.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s smile faltered, and he turned his shoulder brusquely. “Not exactly.”</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee’s eyes caught Suki’s, saying a silent <em>oh brother</em> with just a twitch of her eyebrows. Suki sighed, knocking her elbow into Sokka’s side as the three of them ambled down the length of the dock.</p>
<p class="p1">“Out with it.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka looked across Suki to Ty Lee, who just looked at him with wide, intent eyes. He huffed, shoulders drawing up tighter around his ears.</p>
<p class="p1">“We got into a fight.”</p>
<p class="p1">Suki groaned; Ty Lee made a little sound of commiseration.</p>
<p class="p1">“Hey! Everyone fights sometimes, right?” Sokka looked at the both of them expectantly.</p>
<p class="p1">“I’m surprised it took Zuko this long,” Ty Lee said, head turning absently to take in the sparkling new buildings. “He’s always been such a little hothead.”</p>
<p class="p1">“What was the fight about?” Suki prodded, pulling Ty Lee a little closer into her side. She could already feel the bitter cold seeping deep into her bones — in the back of her mind, Suki was brainstorming ways for her and Ty Lee to warm up later.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka grumbled something incoherent, yelping when Suki poked him. “Stop. Ugh, it’s — he doesn’t want to be official with me yet.”</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee’s head snapped back to attention. “What are you talking about? You’re dating, right? You told all of us, and your family. You’re totally public!”</p>
<p class="p1">“I mean like — <em>royally</em> official. Or whatever that means. With like, a title or something — I don’t even know. Fire Nation customs are so <em>weird</em> — no offense.”</p>
<p class="p1">“None taken!” she chirped. “They are pretty stuffy. I ran away to the circus, remember?”</p>
<p class="p1">He laughed shallowly. “Yeah. It’s just that he <em>says </em>he wants to be with me, and then he doesn’t want to do it all the way. Like — we’re already an open secret, that’s what I don’t understand about it. Everyone already knows, what’s the point in pretending anymore?” Sokka grew more agitated as he went on, hands gesturing about wildly. “He’s not making any fucking sense. And he’s mad at <em>me! </em>He’s been sulking for the past three days like a <em>child.</em> Ugh!”</p>
<p class="p1">Suki put a hand on his shoulder. “Have you tried talking to him again? Trying to meet him where he is?”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka pouted. “No. He doesn’t <em>want</em> to talk to me, he’s being all prickly.”</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee laughed, loud enough that it startled Sokka out of his pout. “Of course he wants you to talk to him! Zuko’s just bad at saying that.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Where is he? I’ll go smack some sense into him,” Suki offers, grinning. “It’s been too long since I’ve kicked his ass, anyways.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Suki, no.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Suki, yes!”</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">Zuko stared into the small, hammered mirror. A Zuko with sullen eyes and a pursed mouth stared back. Three days of bitten-off comments and Sokka turned grumpily away in bed was three days too many. Granted, Zuko had turned grumpily away as well, but. Would it hurt him to reach out? So Zuko could feel Sokka’s warm palm on his shoulder? <em>I don’t think that’s too much to ask.</em></p>
<p class="p1"><em>Maybe he’s waiting for me to reach out.</em> Zuko knew how testy and stand-offish he could get. Mai and Iroh had informed him as much, in the past. <em>But he’s the one who bit my head off.</em> Zuko combed his hair roughly, the teeth of the pearled comb catching painfully against the snags. He sucked in a hiss. <em>Spirits, maybe I should just cut it all off. It’d be easier to deal with, at least.</em></p>
<p class="p1">“Need a hand?”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko twisted to find Sokka’s silhouette at the door. He twisted back, letting the comb clatter to the wooden table in front of him. A petulant part of him wanted to shut Sokka out, throw up some nice, comforting walls, but his uncle’s nagging voice in his head told him (correctly) that it wouldn’t make things any easier in the end. <em>Damn it.</em></p>
<p class="p1">“…Sure.”</p>
<p class="p1">The silence, as Sokka took the comb in his hand and started gently teasing out the tangles, was deafening. It felt like the summer, before they’d told their friends, when their secrecy had wriggled its way in between them and settled there, like a bullet with no exit wound. Zuko <em>hated </em>it. He felt uncomfortable in his skin, restless, simmering until he reached a boiling point. Each errant brush of Sokka’s fingers at the nape of his neck was another lit fuse.</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re just going to ignore it?” Zuko snapped, and Sokka’s hands stopped.</p>
<p class="p1">He could hear Sokka’s wavering sigh behind him. “I’m not <em>ignoring</em> anything, Zuko. I just… want to give you space.”</p>
<p class="p1">“I don’t want space! I want to <em>be</em> with you.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko was surprised to hear his own voice break, and then Sokka’s hand was cupping his cheek, and he choked on a burble of tears.</p>
<p class="p1">“Zuko…” Sokka took a sharp breath, and swallowed. “That’s what I’ve been asking for this whole time.”</p>
<p class="p1">He pushed his cheek into Sokka’s hand, barely succeeding in getting a handle on his tears. <em>How can I act like this? When he’s the one asking for more. </em></p>
<p class="p1">“I know, I’m sorry.” Zuko scrubbed his hands at his eyes, gritting his teeth. “Fuck. I’m sorry. I’m saying all this — confusing, contradictory shit — and today’s about Katara and Aang —” He could feel more tears coming up as he spoke.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka started combing again, but stayed silent. Zuko’s eyes squeezed shut.</p>
<p class="p1">“I want to tell the whole world about us. I really do, I just feel like I can’t. It’s — I wish I wasn’t the Fire Lord anymore.” Zuko swallowed, scoffing, throwing his arms out with abandon. “I should just fucking abdicate. Who gives a shit.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka leaned down to give Zuko’s forehead a kiss. “I think a lot of your citizens would give a shit. Listen, I get… you know, I don’t <em>really </em>get it. I think you’re not giving your own nation enough credit — were we not in the same council meeting, or didn’t Minister Ikeda brief us on those demonstrations?</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko remembered. He remembered the demonstrations themselves, too; he’d snuck to the edge of the palace grounds, gotten close enough to hear them. “Yes.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Even though I don’t get it, I’m not gonna drop you like a hot dumpling before we figure this out. Okay?”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko turned, tilting his face up into Sokka’s. His eyes were shining — how dare they ever be that way on Zuko’s account — so Zuko leapt up, wrapping his arms around Sokka’s shoulders.</p>
<p class="p1">“I love you,” he murmured into Sokka’s ear, and Sokka gave a little hiccuping laugh.</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah, yeah. I love you too.”</p>
<p class="p1">They got ready together, exchanging pecks between Sokka pulling Zuko’s hair up into his topknot and Zuko braiding strands of Sokka’s hair into decorative plaits. Zuko finally dug out his regalia, long forgotten at the bottom of his luggage. He shook it out — it was wrinkled in places, from being thrown in haphazardly and not folded with the usual care of royal attendants.</p>
<p class="p1">It had been weeks since he’d worn it; the undergarments were still as soft and fine-woven as he remembered, but the shoulder-pieces felt heavy and unfamiliar as he followed along behind Sokka. Tribemembers were filtering out of their homes, chattering to each other and sneaking sidelong glances at Zuko. He felt like a sore thumb, an angry red thorn surrounded by soft beige and blue. He wished he wore his parka.</p>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<hr/>
<p class="p2"> </p>
<p class="p1">The music was in full swing, and Sokka had a cup of chang in his hands — a drink with a sour twist that Aang had remembered from his people’s festivals, long ago. Sokka had finally collected himself after that miserable display at the ceremony; Toph’s punch to his arm had shocked him out of it.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka settled in his chair, watching his sister in the throes of giddy, newlywed bliss. They were by themselves, tucked behind a table, Aang festooned in colorful beads. Katara laughed at something he said, leaning back in her chair with her hand to her chest. It was good to see her with her eyes crinkled up at the edges, with her cheeks round from smiling too much.</p>
<p class="p1">He wished he could just enjoy it, simply: his sister, his best friend, even his dad — Sokka had spotted a misty-eyed Hakoda during the ceremony, but now he looked happy as a clam, serving Bato another helping of five-flavor soup. Still, that niggling thought worried at the back of his mind… Zuko. Hakoda had told him that he just needed to be patient. Did he even <em>know </em>Sokka?</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka launched up from his seat, determined not to wallow. Why wallow when Suki was right there?</p>
<p class="p1">“…with me, Suki!” Ty Lee had Suki’s hands clasped tightly between hers.</p>
<p class="p1">“Ty, you know I love you, but I’m all danced out for now.” Suki was panting near a table piled high with food.</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee gave Suki her best polar-bear-puppy eyes, to no avail.</p>
<p class="p1">Mai took a small sip from her cup. “Come on, take mercy on her.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Mai.” Sokka pulled up short — he didn’t realize it was her until she’d turned, face ringed with the plush, mottled-grey fur lining of her coat.</p>
<p class="p1">She looked at him with an unreadable expression. “Sokka.”</p>
<p class="p1">“It’s been a while.” She looked the same, but something about her was older, surer; maybe it was the set of her shoulders.</p>
<p class="p1">“It has, hasn’t it.” She peered behind him. “What, is Zuko hiding from me?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Zuzu and Sokka are having a lover’s quarrel,” Ty Lee chittered, earning a smack on the arm from Suki.</p>
<p class="p1">Mai snorted. “Let me guess, you told him his blade-sharpening technique was off. He was always so touchy —”</p>
<p class="p1">“I don’t really want to talk about it!” Sokka said brightly, plastering on a smile. Suki and Mai exchanged glances, but he breezed right past it, saying, “I’d rather talk about how fantastic Gran-Gran’s kale cookies came out.” He stuffed a couple in his mouth. “Am I right?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Alright, then. When do you think they’re gonna start having babies?” Ty Lee cooed. Sokka choked on his cookies. “Oh, they’ll have the cutest kids. Maybe some airbenders!”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka took a large swig of his chang to wash down the cookie he just aspirated. “I don’t really want to talk about that, either.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Ah, grow up, Sokka. It’s a wedding.” Suki rolled her eyes, taking a bite out of a kale cookie.</p>
<p class="p1">“She’s still my sister!”</p>
<p class="p1">Mai had a dangerous little smile on her face. “Well, if you don’t want to talk about that, should we talk about how cozy Hakoda and Bato are looking today?” She nodded across the hall, to where the two men had their heads bent close together in conversation, and shrugged. “I’m just saying.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka sputtered. “They’re lifelong friends! You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He took another drink. “I mean, you just got here!”</p>
<p class="p1">She held her hands up in surrender, one still wrapped around her drink. “I’m just saying, as an objective observer…”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka scoffed, ready to tell her exactly what he thought of that — <em>what, two grown men can’t be friends? They fought in a war together, watched each other grow up, what kind of preposterous </em>— when he felt a hand touch his elbow in greeting.</p>
<p class="p1">“So you’ve finally come out of hiding,” Mai said, with a sharp little smile.</p>
<p class="p1">“I wasn’t <em>hiding</em>.” Zuko shivered, a gloved hand slipping out to pull his cloak tighter around him. “I was giving my congratulations to Katara and Aang.”</p>
<p class="p1">Ty Lee perked up. “Will <em>you</em> dance with me, Zuko? I think I’ve worn Suki out.”</p>
<p class="p1">“I just wanted a <em>snack</em> —”</p>
<p class="p1">“That’s alright. Maybe later?” She stuck out her tongue, but Zuko wasn’t looking. He was watching Sokka, with that hopeful tilt of his brow that Sokka knew so well. It was when he didn’t want Sokka to know, that his brow knitted together and his eyes widened, just a touch, and his lips pressed tight.</p>
<p class="p1">“Hey.” It was a private greeting, just for Sokka, murmured under the hum of background conversation around them.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka turned the two of them gently away from the trio of women; he caught Suki’s questioning eyes before they drifted completely away, and shot her a little nod. “Hey, yourself.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Can we — can we go somewhere else to talk?” Zuko asked, glancing around. “I just… it feels —”</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah, sure. Of course.” Sokka hooked an arm through Zuko’s. “Come on, I know just the spot. I designed this place, remember?”</p>
<p class="p1">They ducked into a side hallway, then into another and up a short, narrow staircase. It led to one of the small balconies dotting the back of the main hall, overlooking a new canal and an unfinished section of construction: space for more houses, a new neighborhood, but for now it was a jumble of half-bent ice that sent sharp shadows across the snow, catching the moonlight around the edges.</p>
<p class="p1">“How’s this?” Sokka asked, arm slipping down to hold Zuko’s hand. <em>It’ll be even prettier when everything’s done, </em>he thought, looking at the the mess of ice and envisioning his plans projected over them.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s breath misted in front of him. “Good — great.”</p>
<p class="p1">He looked down at the ground, and Sokka took both hands in his. He looked so much older, sterner in his official robes. Zuko’s long hair fell sleek behind him, not pulled up and back into the braids that first Katara, then Kanna had spent nights by the fire plaiting for him.</p>
<p class="p1">“Sokka…” he started, unsure, and for a wild, stomach-churning moment Sokka thought <em>he’s breaking up with me</em>, but — that’s silly. “I just wanted to talk about — you know.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka hummed noncommittally. Zuko drifted in closer, hands twisting tighter in Sokka’s. The little puffs of breath were coming faster, glowing white where Yue caught them.</p>
<p class="p1">He turned his face up into Sokka’s. “I love you, so much.”</p>
<p class="p1">“I know. I really do know, Zuko.” Sokka tilted his head, eyes flickering over Zuko’s face: wide-eyed, still with that tension in his brow and mouth that Sokka wanted to kiss away. “I’ll — I’ll be patient. It’s okay. We have our families, our friends. I’ll be okay for a while.”</p>
<p class="p1">“But — I don’t want you to just be okay.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka felt his nose prickle, hot and sharp. He had to keep it together — for Katara — he dropped Zuko’s hands, turning to the railing and the canal. “Zuko. I don’t — I just don’t understand why we’re still talking about this. You don’t want to officially ‘court’ me, yet, or whatever, that’s fine. We can make it work. We’ve made it work so far.”</p>
<p class="p1">“No, Sokka, I’m —” he huffed, frustrated. “I’m trying to tell you I want that.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka choked a teary laugh. “Well, I should hope you want to make it work.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Ugh!” Zuko threw up his hands. “Why am I so bad at this? Being official, Sokka. I want to do it.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka turned back to him, too hopeful to trust himself. Zuko had both gloved hands balled up at his sides, lips pressed together in a determined line.</p>
<p class="p1">“Really?” Sokka asked, giddy, and then worry wormed its way in: “Don’t do it just for my sake —”</p>
<p class="p1">“I <em>want</em> to. I realized that Suki’s right.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s laugh bubbled its way right through his tears. “Suki?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Well. And you. She had some, uh. Words with me.”</p>
<p class="p1">“You know, I told her to leave it alone.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s mouth quirked up. “When has she ever done that?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Point taken.” Sokka reached out, across the divide between them, coaxing Zuko’s hands out of their clenched little balls.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko sighed, watching Sokka fold open his hands and grasp them again. “She’s right, because in the end, I want it just as much as you do, but I’m just — scared. I’ve never really felt right, wearing this thing —” he gestures to his headpiece, “— the one my father wore. Sleeping in my father’s bed. But it feels better with you.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka remembered the first time he woke in the middle of the night, to find Zuko wide awake next to him, staring hollow-eyed at the ceiling. He remembered how, with time, Sokka learned to slip his arms around Zuko, and run his hands through Zuko’s hair under his eyes finally fluttered shut.</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re — I can’t believe <em>you</em> picked <em>me</em>.” Sokka scoffed, trying in vain to keep a bashful smile from pulling at the corners of his mouth, vision blurring a little around the edges with unshed tears. “No, seriously. I’m — you know how I am. And you’re brilliant, and funny even when you’re making the worst jokes I’ve ever heard —”</p>
<p class="p1">“Hey!”</p>
<p class="p1">“— and you’re so loyal, you’d do anything for your family… it makes me think about — well. My point is, Suki’s right.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko pulled Sokka tight, eyes fierce, so close Sokka could feel the warmth of their humid, cloudy breath between them.</p>
<p class="p1">“What is Suki right about?” Sokka said, hushed.</p>
<p class="p1">“It’s unbecoming of the Fire Lord to act like a scaredy-cat,” Zuko whispered. “Her words.”</p>
<p class="p1">His soft brown eyes flitted over Sokka’s face, mouth to eyes and back again, lips parting as Sokka leaned closer.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko swallowed, cracking a smile. “You’re giving me butterflies.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka felt wings flutter against the inside of his own chest. “Still?”</p>
<p class="p1">The air between them held its breath, too, and then Zuko pressed in, pulling Sokka closer by the front of his parka. His lips were icy at first, chilled from the air — Sokka kissed him harder, letting his body go where Zuko pulled him. He cupped his mittened hands around the back of Zuko’s head, clutching him close. The warm slide of Zuko’s tongue curling into his mouth set his skin sparkling; Zuko, Zuko, Zuko, who made his stomach swoop and was pulling back, laughing through the kiss, wrapping his arms around Sokka’s waist.</p>
<p class="p1">“I’m yours, and I want everyone to know it,” Zuko panted, arms tightening around Sokka.</p>
<p class="p1">“And I’m yours,” Sokka said, desperate, searching out another kiss.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka’s favorite part about kissing Zuko was how responsive he was: lips opening readily when Sokka kissed him harder, sighing into Sokka’s mouth; hands shifting up to grasp Sokka’s jaw, holding him tight and close; the way Zuko’s breathing picked up, halting and frantic, when Sokka let the sharp ridge of his teeth graze along Zuko’s lower lip. They’d gotten so good at this, knowing how to push and pull each other, how to reel each other in and stoke the heat between them. Zuko knew that dragging his mouth down to kiss over Sokka’s throat would make him gasp into the icy air, and Sokka knew that raking his hands through Zuko’s hair, nails scratching lightly at the nape of his neck, would make Zuko spread his mouth wider and more insistent on Sokka’s goosebumped skin.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka thought of the courtyard, when Zuko had been pressed between his chest and the flagstones — discovering things about Zuko was exciting, sure, but knowing them was a satisfaction all its own. Sokka knew that the tugging of Zuko’s hands at the front of his parka meant that he wanted Sokka to press him up against the cold wall, so Sokka did. And he knew that Zuko loved when Sokka slipped his leg between Zuko’s and leaned in, so Sokka did. And Zuko knew that when Sokka did those things, it meant he wanted Zuko to buck up against him and pull him in tighter, so Zuko did.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko slipped off his gloves, too, tucking his fingers under Sokka’s parka and underclothes, searching for skin; they were icy cold when they found it, and Sokka flinched back.</p>
<p class="p1">“Fuck, your hands are freezing.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko smiled, open-mouthed against Sokka’s lips. “Oops. Forgot to warm them up.”</p>
<p class="p1">All of a sudden, they were simmering with heat, like rocks that had been warmed by the sun. They felt delicious, palms spread wide over Sokka’s sides.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka groaned, feeling Zuko’s toasty hands coast over his skin, and wriggled as close to Zuko as he could. He wrapped his arms around Zuko’s shoulders, tucking his head in to mouth at Zuko’s jaw.</p>
<p class="p1">“Feels nice?” Zuko murmured, hands still moving. His fingers pressed in, kneading at Sokka’s back.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka mumbled something to the affirmative into the fur lining of Zuko’s cloak, shifting to try to get even closer — which was, frustratingly, impossible. He rocked his hips into Zuko’s, once, twice, grinning when Zuko’s breath caught and his hands gripped at Sokka’s skin. Sokka couldn’t feel much through the thick layers between them, but his body searched for the friction anyway, and from Zuko’s gasp, it seemed like his body wanted that friction, too.</p>
<p class="p1">He laid his head back against the thick wall of ice, baring his neck for Sokka’s tongue. Sokka loved Zuko in Water Tribe blues, but something about the regalia — maybe it was how long it had been since he’d worn it, maybe it was all the crisp lines begging to be mussed up, maybe it was the spicy warm scent Zuko was wearing — had Sokka’s cheeks flushed and his chest tight.</p>
<p class="p1">“We should… huh, get back to the. Uh…” Zuko breathed, eyelids sliding shut as Sokka shifted from one side of his neck to the other.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka hummed against Zuko’s skin. “Yeah?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Umm… fuck.” Zuko shifted, hands still hot and grasping. “We should get back to the party. Shit. Sokka. Stop… uh.”</p>
<p class="p1">“You want me to stop?” he said, soft, right next to Zuko’s ear. He kissed him there, too.</p>
<p class="p1">“Unh-uh.” Zuko shook his head <em>no</em>, fingers curling over to scrape his nails lightly over Sokka’s back. “Don’t.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka laughed a little at that, nuzzling into Zuko’s neck. <em>Fuck. I love him so much.</em> Zuko laughed, too, breathless, sighing and curling around Sokka.</p>
<p class="p1">“Would you maybe —” Zuko dissolved into more laughter when Sokka pressed quick kisses over his cheek. “Listen! Do you know any other, um. Little spots like this?” Another kiss to Zuko’s cheek. “Maybe inside.”</p>
<p class="p1">A mischievous grin spread over Sokka’s face. “What? I thought you wanted to go back to the party…” He grazed his teeth over Zuko’s neck, relishing the choked noise that came out of him.</p>
<p class="p1">“Don’t make me go back out like this,” Zuko rasped, squirming.</p>
<p class="p1">“I think I know a spot. Come on.” He pulled back, giggling at the way Zuko’s hairpiece was listing to the side, off-kilter.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko grinned. “Look at you.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Me?” Sokka looked down at himself, then back up when Zuko brushed back Sokka’s hair, fussing with the braiding.</p>
<p class="p1">“Mm-hmm. You’re a mess.”</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re one to talk. Just — come <em>on</em>,” Sokka urged, grabbing Zuko to drag him by the hand back inside.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka knew exactly where he was going: down the staircase, a left, scurrying past an errant lost guest — one of the tribeswomen, who eyed them curiously. Sokka looked back at Zuko, snorting to see him blushing violently.</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re so cute,” Sokka confessed, dragging him in for a quick kiss. He felt loopy, stupid, giddy with knowing that Zuko was all his.</p>
<p class="p1">“Would you shut up and take me to this spot of yours already?” Zuko laughed, pushing Sokka back but keeping one hand clasped tight.</p>
<p class="p1">They raced across the building, into the library; it stood mostly empty, but for a few racks of scrolls. Soon it would fill up, with books and scrolls and maps, but for now it was just for Sokka and the man he loved. He pulled Zuko into the bare stacks, and then Zuko had him up against one of them, sinking into his mouth again.</p>
<p class="p1">“Fuck, this is —” Sokka swore, legs going a little weak when Zuko’s teeth caught at Sokka’s lip.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko panted a <em>yeah</em>, hands pulling Sokka’s parka up and over his head to toss it to the side. Sokka’s hands scrabbled at Zuko’s clothes — <em>why the fuck are there so many layers? </em>— pulling at the sash around his waist, pushing those layers to the side and tugging at the waistband of his woolen trousers.</p>
<p class="p1">“Sokka —” Zuko started, whatever he was going to say after choked off when Sokka dropped to his knees.</p>
<p class="p1">Above him, Zuko braced himself with an arm against the sturdy wooden racks, hair hanging around his flushed face. Sokka gave him a loose grin, shutting his eyes when Zuko used his free hand to pet a few errant strands of hair back from his temples. Sokka wasn’t thinking about anything other than the soft gasps Zuko made above him as he took Zuko in his mouth, hot and heavy and solid on his tongue. He started teasingly at first, wrapping his hand around the base lightly, listening to Zuko give a tremulous moan.</p>
<p class="p1">“Spirits, Sokka, you’re…” he whispered, heaving a sigh when Sokka pulled off to lick a line up the underside.</p>
<p class="p1">He teased the ridge of the head with his tongue, just the way he knew Zuko liked, smiling when it twitched in his mouth and Zuko sucked in a tight breath.</p>
<p class="p1">“Yeah?” Sokka said, and hollowed out his cheeks around Zuko, looking up him.</p>
<p class="p1">That face — Zuko’s glazed eyes, half-shut, mouth dropped open and desperate, his cheeks flushed fever-red — made Sokka’s gut curl in satisfaction. It sent a thrill of heat through him, how Zuko pressed his hips gently forward, asking for <em>more</em>, how he swallowed frantically around air.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko panted, “Yeah, like — fuck, like that —” and petered out into helpless moans, crying out softly when Sokka applied gentle suction right around the head, hand twisting up and around. It was fun, working Zuko up into a lather, so satisfying to play him like a tautirut; Sokka watched Zuko fall apart, trying not to smile too wide.</p>
<p class="p1">He pulled off — a moment Zuko took advantage of to catch his breath — and coughed a little, licking along the length of him and working the slickness over him with his hand. He needed a little lubrication to work with if he was going to really make Zuko’s knees turn to jelly.</p>
<p class="p1">“Sokka, I swear to the fucking heavens…” he hissed, breath hitching when Sokka’s thumb rubbed over the head again.</p>
<p class="p1">“That’s good?” Sokka asked sweetly, sliding his fingers up to the same spot.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko was biting down so hard on his lip, he looked like he was going to draw blood. Or pass out. “Uh-huh.”</p>
<p class="p1">“You like that, don’t you baby,” Sokka said, low and quiet. “You wanna come in my mouth, huh.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s legs trembled a little before he shifted, resetting his stance. “Please.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka let more saliva drip out of his mouth and onto his hand, and started to work up a quick pace. Zuko’s little moans grew louder, more reckless; especially broken ones would leak out, high and wavering, starting to echo off the domed ceiling of the empty library.</p>
<p class="p1">“Shhh. You don’t want someone to hear you.” Sokka took a little mercy on him, stopping to mouth along Zuko for a moment. “Can you be quiet for me, baby?”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko’s eyes widened, and he clamped his mouth shut, nodding.</p>
<p class="p1">“That’s it, be nice and quiet. What if someone heard you like this, huh?” Sokka watched Zuko’s cheeks run dark, watched his eyes roll as he started stroking him quickly again. He pressed on, a crooked grin pulling at his mouth as Zuko struggled to keep a lid on himself. “Can you imagine if someone found you, desperate to get your cock sucked? Look at you,” Sokka whispered between them.</p>
<p class="p1">At Sokka’s words Zuko clapped a hand over his mouth, head lolling forward. Sokka sped up, squeezing tighter, and a strangled moan died on it’s way out of Zuko’s chest. Sokka watched as Zuko’s legs trembled again, and his chest heaved, and he knew Zuko was right at the peak, just needed a little gust of wind to send him over the edge — or maybe a filthy word or two.</p>
<p class="p1">“Give it to me,” Sokka pleaded, not caring what came out of his mouth as long as it got Zuko there. “Want it so bad, want you to come in my mouth — baby, please — wanna taste it, fucking give it to me, come on, so fucking good for me Zuko —” and then Zuko whimpered, and Sokka opened his mouth, laying him on his tongue, and looked up at Zuko with lidded eyes as he gasped out his orgasm. He didn’t bother keeping his palm over his moans anymore, and just gripped the scrollrack behind Sokka for dear life, shuddering.</p>
<p class="p1">It was tart and bitter on Sokka’s tongue, but he didn’t mind, especially not when he wrapped his lips around Zuko again and suckled lightly, and Zuko hissed, curling in over Sokka and clutching at his head.</p>
<p class="p1">“Ah — Sokka — more is —” he choked, and then Sokka pulled off for good, smiling blearily up at his boyfriend’s delirious face. He’d gotten Zuko wild, dizzy, undone, just like Sokka wanted.</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko pulled limply at Sokka’s shoulders, so Sokka pulled Zuko’s trousers back up and stood finally, wincing at his sore knees unfolding. Zuko plastered himself onto Sokka, arms around his shoulders, kissing him messily.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka laughed, clasping his arms around Zuko’s waist and pulling back from the kiss, the better to see Zuko’s blissed-out face.</p>
<p class="p1">“You good?” Sokka asked, and Zuko smiled wide, leaning a little of his weight on Sokka, who in turn leaned back against the scrollrack. <em>I hope these things are as sturdy as that merchant claimed.</em></p>
<p class="p1">“<em>So</em> good.” Sokka grinned back at that, and in a saccharine impulse, laid a kiss on Zuko’s forehead. “Mm. I love you,” Zuko said, curling around Sokka even more.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka hummed, shifting. Zuko slid his hands over Sokka’s fur-lined shirt, fingers moving to slip under the fleeced fabric, and Sokka leaned into the touch. He’d forgotten about himself, a little bit, in the excitement of watching Zuko come apart, but at the touch of Zuko’s warmed fingers that bloodrush ripped through him anew.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka nodded eagerly when Zuko raised a brow at him, swallowing down a whine when Zuko palmed him, leaning harder against the scrollrack when Zuko kissed his neck sloppily —</p>
<p class="p1">“You two!” the voice rang out, clear as a bell in the vast space of the library, and shocked Zuko into snatching his hand right out of Sokka’s trousers. Sokka looked from left to right — <em>no one there — someone must have just come in —</em></p>
<p class="p1">“I know you’re in here.” Zuko looked at Sokka with wide eyes as they both recognized Toph’s voice, and then pulled Sokka in tight to muffle his laughter in Sokka’s shoulder. Sokka snickered — Zuko hissed a barely-contained <em>shh</em> at him, and Sokka buried his face into the plush fur lining of Zuko’s hood to keep himself from bursting into an all-out guffaw.</p>
<p class="p1">“I might be blind, but I’m not deaf.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka shook in laughter against Zuko as he pulled his head up, swallowing. In a shaky imitation of his Fire Lord voice, Zuko called back: “We’ll be back out in a minute!”</p>
<p class="p1">“Not a minute, now! Katara’s about to steal Aang and I’m pretty sure Sokka doesn’t want to miss it.” She paused a beat. “Don’t make me come get you. You know I’ll do it.”</p>
<p class="p1">“That won’t be necessary!” Sokka choked out, half-giggling. Zuko smacked his arm. “We were just — uh — I was just showing the Fire Lord some official —”</p>
<p class="p1">“I don’t want to know what you were showing him!” Toph interrupted. Zuko snorted, shoving his face into Sokka’s shoulder again. “Just pull yourselves together. I’m leaving now, but if you’re not out in five minutes I’m gonna let Katara kill you.”</p>
<p class="p1">Zuko pulled back, breathless with laughter. “Fuck off,” he said, gasping for air.</p>
<p class="p1">“Come on, we gotta get you looking presentable again.” Sokka fussed with Zuko’s hairpiece, clumsily smoothing out the strands.</p>
<p class="p1">“You’re the one that looks very much like you just got done sucking a dick.”</p>
<p class="p1">“Do I?” Sokka gave him an impish grin, “Do I look positively <em>ravished</em>, Your Fieryness?”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka slid his arms back around Zuko’s waist, leaning in for another smooch, but Zuko batted him away, scrambling to tie his gold sash around his waist again. “Focus, Sokka.”</p>
<p class="p1">“One more kiss?” he whined, and Zuko rolled his eyes. <em>It’s not my fault he got me all worked up and didn’t do anything about it.</em></p>
<p class="p1">“Do you want to miss your sister’s wedding?” he huffed, and then melted a little. “I’ll make it up to you later, okay? I promise.”</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka waggled his eyebrows. “Ooh, you <em>promise —</em>”</p>
<p class="p1">“I’m coming back there!” Toph yelled, and Sokka grabbed his parka from the floor and darted out from behind the scrollrack.</p>
<p class="p1">“Look, Toph, I’m coming, see?” Sokka said breezily, as Zuko emerged alongside him, still adjusting his shoulder-pieces.</p>
<p class="p1">“I don’t, actually. Thanks for making this place out of literally just ice.” She tapped her cane sourly on the floor.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka laughed awkwardly. “Ha, yeah. Sorry ‘bout that. Don’t have many earthbenders around here, ya know?”</p>
<p class="p1">“Sure, whatever. Let’s go.” She turned, marching back down the hallway, not waiting for either Sokka or Zuko to lead the way.</p>
<p class="p1">In the end, Sokka <em>was</em> glad Toph had come to get them; seeing Katara launch Aang into the back of her sled, blushing furiously when the tribeswomen whooped and hollered, was priceless, as was the way Aang theatrically protested, grinning all the while. Hakoda wrapped her up in a hug, quick and tight and warm, and then she was taking the reins of the polar dogs, sitting at attention with their tongues lolling.</p>
<p class="p1">They zipped off into the night — they were just going across town, to Katara’s house, but it still felt strange, seeing the two figures fade into inky black. His sister and his best friend, hopelessly in love, going off to start the next part of their life. It looked so lovely, running off into the snow with the person you loved, to a hot fire and a warm bed together.</p>
<p class="p1">Sokka felt fingers slip between his own and looked to Zuko, who was staring at him with tentative eyes and a tense mouth. Sokka squeezed Zuko’s hand, and the tension gave way to a small smile, one that Zuko ducked his head to hide.</p>
<p class="p1">Yeah. A hot fire and a warm bed sounded really nice.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! I did the best research I could into Inuit weddings in order to depict Aang and Katara's wedding well, but as always please let me know if I made any missteps.</p>
<p>Also, I changed the chapter count! During edits I decided to combine the last two chapters into one since it flowed better that way. I have a few final edits to make on the last chapter but it should be up in the next day or two. </p>
<p>I've absolutely adored all your comments, even if I didn't reply to all of them. I cherish each one :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Starlight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Who's gonna get their act together first? It's anyone's guess.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">“Okay. So then, Aang’s gonna come through on his glider — with said banner, of course —”</p><p class="p1">“This is ridiculous, Sokka.” Katara looked at him, sighing. “I love you, but this is just over the top.”</p><p class="p1">“That’s the point!”</p><p class="p1">Sokka gestured to his flowchart. The flowchart was essential. His plan had a lot of moving pieces, thank you very much, and for good reason. How else was someone supposed to ask the Fire Lord to marry them?</p><p class="p1">“Zuko’s not a really a <em>grand gestures </em>kind of guy.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka huffed. “Well, overshooting it is better than undershooting it. I don’t want him to think I half-assed it.”</p><p class="p1">“Why don’t you do something smaller, more personal, than…” Katara trailed off, wincing at the flowchart.</p><p class="p1">“But, like…” Sokka cast around for his words, then deflated. “My flowchart.”</p><p class="p1">“We’ll figure something out.”</p><p class="p1">Katara patted his shoulder softly, and Sokka started up again, morose. “How am I supposed to propose —”</p><p class="p1">“You’re proposing?” Bato chimed in from the open doorway, a fish for dinner in each hand.</p><p class="p1">Sokka groaned. <em>At this rate, Zuko’s going to know before I can even make a plan.</em> “Yes. I am.”</p><p class="p1">Bato set the fish aside to clap Sokka firmly on the back. “Well, that’s great news. How are you gonna ask him?”</p><p class="p1">“I don’t <em>know</em>,” Sokka wailed, crumpling up the flowchart. “I had all these plans, but you’re right Katara it’s too much —”</p><p class="p1">“How do they do it in the Fire Nation, anyways?” Bato asked. He took the flowchart from Sokka’s hands and unfurled it, looking over the elaborate instructions.</p><p class="p1">Sokka flopped back onto the cushions. “First of all, it’s usually a man proposing to a woman, so we’re already a little, uh, <em>unique.</em> And something tells me that Ozai wouldn’t be enthusiastic about blessing our engagement.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” Bato waved his hand dismissively. “Didn’t you say that Zuko’s uncle is like a father to him?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka perked up. “Yeah. Okay, so I’ll write to Iroh.” <em>Can’t imagine he’ll have a problem with it. </em>“But then there’s like, all these gifts I’m supposed to give? Like, <em>so much</em>. I can’t afford the dowry of a Fire Lord!”</p><p class="p1">“And again, I don’t think Zuko really cares about expensive things,” Katara said, de-scaling the fish with deft strokes of her knife. “He doesn’t even wear his Fire Lord robes anymore.”</p><p class="p1">What was Sokka going to do? Between his sister, his father, Bato, his Gran-Gran, <em>and </em>Aang — at this point, half the village had piped in with their advice — none of them had managed to cook up the winning idea. Maybe Sokka could just get Momo to do it for him?</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko was really starting to get the hang of this — he squinted, threading a bead carefully over his needle, and took another stitch on the still-unattached shirtsleeve. Kanna sat nearby, working on the main part of the dress, the star of the show; a bodice beaded with patterns that danced over the fabric.</p><p class="p1">“This okay?” he asked, holding out the sleeve to her. She glanced over it and nodded, so Zuko went back to work, focusing on making his stitching as even as possible.</p><p class="p1">After a long while, Kanna cleared her throat.</p><p class="p1">“So you boys are living together now?” she asked calmly.</p><p class="p1">They’d never really broached the subject of Sokka and Zuko, just the two of them. Zuko assumed that Sokka talked to her about it, of course, and she’d clearly known they were together from the moment Zuko set foot back in the South again, but the tenuous little companionship he’d managed to build with Kanna was quiet. He helped her, and sat with her when they worked together, and made her tea in the nighttime. The day she’d offered to braid his hair back — “To keep all of this hair out of the seal,” she’d said brusquely — he’d held his breath the whole time in disbelief.</p><p class="p1">All of which to say, Zuko and Kanna didn’t really gab together about his relationship with her grandson.</p><p class="p1">“Yes, ma’am.” Zuko snuck a peek at her out of the corner of his eye; she was still stitching.</p><p class="p1">“Hmm. Sokka, always doing things out of order. You know what it means to build a life together?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko stammered, “Uh — um — yes?”</p><p class="p1">“Sokka’s very loyal. He deserves someone that will be loyal in return.” She looks up, fixing Zuko with a stare. “Don’t you agree?”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, yes. Um.” Zuko’s hands felt a little clammy.</p><p class="p1">“Good. I’m glad we can see eye to eye.” She started stitching again. “Another wedding, so soon after Katara’s. We’ll run out of food if you kids keep getting married at this rate.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s brain skidded to a halt. <em>Married?</em> “Married? What are you —”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, just a grandmother’s intuition,” she said placidly. “Well. We don’t really have marriages here, not the way you do. Two people just start living together — as long as the family approves.” She gave him another pointed look.</p><p class="p1">“I see.” Zuko paused. “No betrothal necklace?”</p><p class="p1">Kanna sniffed. “It’s different where I grew up — the North can be a bit formal. No, no necklaces.”</p><p class="p1"><em>Marriage.</em> Zuko turned it over in his mind, the concept of proposing to Sokka. <em>Well, apparently we’re already married, by Southern standards. </em>He kind of liked the idea, having a home that was theirs, and not just his. Just building a life together. Spending the rest of his life with Sokka at his side… he couldn’t think of anyone he’d rather face the world with.</p><p class="p1">“Sooo,” Zuko started, and Kanna raised a brow. “If I were to, uhm. Hypothetically, want to do something to signify how loyal I’m going to be to Sokka…” He coughed. “Since we’re already living together, I mean.”</p><p class="p1">A small smile tugged at Kanna’s cheeks. “Hypothetically.”</p><p class="p1">“Yes.”</p><p class="p1">“Sometimes there is an exchange of gifts. Lovers’ trinkets, that sort of nonsense. Didn’t Sokka ever give you something to remember him by? Kids these days. I’ll have to talk to that boy, too.”</p><p class="p1"><em>Didn’t Sokka ever…</em> Zuko pondered that, stitching in another bead. <em>The sparrowkeet! </em>That little carved wooden bird, the one that Sokka had given him at his house in the woods. That weekend before anyone knew, when it felt like they were the only two people in the whole world. When Zuko had given Sokka those unbearable poems, and Sokka had given him the sparrowkeet. It had since been worn smooth by Zuko’s thumb brushing over it, tucked in his robes during meetings and those weeks away — a soothing reminder that Sokka loved him, even the hard, gnarled parts.</p><p class="p1">“I think I… I might have an idea.”</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">It was a pared down plan, but still a plan nonetheless. Sokka had gotten rid of the Aang-banner idea, and the trained otter penguins, <em>and </em>the serenade, but the important parts were still there. He had the canoe, and he had the wine — a silly, bubbly drink he’d paid out the nose to get shipped all the way down South — and he had the ring, carved out of bone.</p><p class="p1">He hadn’t been able to think of something better, okay? <em>But what if — does bone even go with all of Zuko’s outfits — No, don’t second-guess yourself. This is nice.</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka whipped around when Zuko called out to him. <em>He’s coming, he’s coming, I’m actually going to do this? This is insane.</em></p><p class="p1">“I’ve got lunch packed up. I’m ready to go see these cliffs you’ve been hyping up.” Zuko placed the packaged food gingerly in the canoe and looked up at Sokka, embarrassed. “Will you help me get in?”</p><p class="p1"><em>Fuck, he’s cute when he blushes. </em>“Yes, your princeliness,” Sokka teases, just to see him screw his nose up and look away.</p><p class="p1">Sokka held his hand out for Zuko to brace himself on, and impulsively plants a kiss on the back of Zuko’s hand. Zuko looks up at him quizzically, and Sokka stammers.</p><p class="p1">“Your chariot awaits,” Sokka says, trying to play it all off as more teasing. He wanted to smack himself in the face. <em>Pull it together, man.</em></p><p class="p1">It was quiet out by the cliffs, water sloshing softly as Sokka steered them. Sokka had ostensibly picked that spot to show Zuko the stunning rock formations; they arched into the sea, thin and high like herons’ legs, pummeled into twists by the wind and the water. They were beautiful, but really Sokka had brought Zuko there to get them away from any prying eyes. He wanted it to be just the two of them.</p><p class="p1">“Wow,” Zuko murmured as they slid beneath one of the arches.</p><p class="p1">Sokka paddled them gently through, watching Zuko look up, wide-eyed, lips pink with cold — Sokka felt a little nauseous, actually. <em>What are you so worked up for? You know he loves you. </em>So why did he feel like a nervous teenager again?</p><p class="p1">He tucked his oar into the canoe, letting them drift. Sokka slid his hand into his pocket, felt the ridges of the beads, took a deep breath —</p><p class="p1">“Should we have lunch soon? I’m starving.” Zuko was turning, pawing around for some blubbered seal jerky.</p><p class="p1">Sokka let out the deep breath. “Yeah, sure.”</p><p class="p1">They ate in the boat. Every few minutes, Sokka would try to gather all his resolve, just to decide <em>I can’t ask him with my mouth full, I’ll wait until after when we’re going home, then the wine… </em>Zuko would smile at him, with his wind-whipped cheeks, and Sokka would come <em>this close</em> to saying it.</p><p class="p1">“What’s up?” Zuko asked softly, nudging Sokka’s knee. “You seem a little lost in thought.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, uh. Nothing. Just zoning out.” <em>He knows me too well. </em>“About you.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko snorts fondly. “Well, good thing I’m right here.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka hummed, kissing him before he could spot anything else amiss. It was pleasantly distracting, kissing Zuko slowly, quietly — suddenly, Sokka didn’t have a worry in the world. Zuko pulled back a hair, breathing out a little laugh.</p><p class="p1">“Thanks for showing me this,” Zuko whispered. “Your whole home, really. I love it here.” He pulled back more, eyes darting over Sokka’s face. “I’d stay here forever if I could.”</p><p class="p1">“You unfortunately have a job,” Sokka whispered back, cupping his face in his hands. “The Fire Lord, remember?”</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, yeah. But I just want to stay here with you.” Zuko’s hands came up to curl around Sokka’s wrists.</p><p class="p1">Sokka smiled, kissing him again. “Okay. How about a compromise: I’ll come with you to the Fire Nation, and we’ll get Katara to bend some snow for us?”</p><p class="p1">“That sounds permissible.”</p><p class="p1">“Deal.” Sokka found his soft brown eyes, really looked at them: rich, ringed with inky black, burning brilliant gold when they caught the sun, dark and bottomless when they’re in shadow. “I’ll always be there with you, Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka found his words coming out of him somber, deadly serious, and Zuko’s brow pulled together slightly at his tone.</p><p class="p1">“…And I’ll be with you,” he responded, slowly. “Is something wrong?”</p><p class="p1"><em>Right now. I should say it right now. </em>“No, nothing’s wrong. I just want you to know.” <em>Fuck! </em></p><p class="p1">“You know you can talk to me. Even if it’s something little.” Zuko searched his eyes.</p><p class="p1">“Yeah, I know. I love you.” Sokka cleared his throat, pulling back a little. “Sorry, I’m just. Feeling a little sappy I guess.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko just hummed, still looking at him carefully.</p><p class="p1">They paddled home in quiet companionship, Sokka quietly kicking himself for not taking the tailor-made opportunity when it presented itself. <em>It just didn’t feel right — no, idiot you just chickened out — what am I even doing with this ring anyways. Wine?? What am I thinking?</em></p><p class="p1">When their canoe pulled in to the dock again, Sokka frantically waved from behind Zuko, drawing a line across his throat in silent warning to the group waiting for them: Hakoda and Katara, and Aang looking just about ready to burst into the air with excitement.</p><p class="p1">“So, how’d it go?” Hakoda asked leadingly, looking between the two of them with a smile.</p><p class="p1">“It was beautiful, Chief Hakoda.”</p><p class="p1">“…Aaaand?” Aang asks. Appa lows behind him.</p><p class="p1">Zuko looked at Aang, confused, before Sokka leapt in. “And some <em>awesome</em> ice. Really cool ice. But that was pretty much it.” Aang wilted.</p><p class="p1">“Oh, what’s this?” Zuko asked, finding the bottle of fizzy wine stowed in the bottom of the canoe.</p><p class="p1">Sokka scoffed dismissively. “Ah, nothing, just something I brought along for lunch. I guess we didn’t need it!” He grabbed the bottle, stuffing it in the bag that once held their food and clambered out of the canoe in a hurry.</p><p class="p1">“Okay…?” Sokka caught Zuko shooting Katara a questioning look and Katara rolling her eyes back. </p><p class="p1">“I give up,” Katara sighed, throwing her arms up into the air and turning on her heel.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">“Alright.” Katara slammed her fist down on the table. “It’s gametime, Sokka. You have to do this.”</p><p class="p1">“Do I really have to?” Sokka whined, looking plaintively up at his sister’s steely face, then over to Aang’s solemn one.</p><p class="p1">“Sorry, buddy. You <em>have </em>to.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka looked to Zuko, then back down at his hands. “Okay, here we go.”</p><p class="p1">He took a steadying breath, and let the little pickled eel slide down his throat.</p><p class="p1">“Eurgh,” Zuko retched, and Katara cackled, lifting her cup.</p><p class="p1">“I didn’t think you’d actually do it!” she crowed, and Aang knocked back another gulp of the liquor.</p><p class="p1">Sokka thought, tapping his finger on his chin. “You know, it actually wasn’t that bad. Just slipped right down.”</p><p class="p1">“Probably because you don’t have a gag reflex anymore,” Katara muttered into her cup. Sokka gasped, pushing her so hard she nearly keeled over.</p><p class="p1">Zuko choked on his drink. “<em>What</em> has gotten into you, Katara?”</p><p class="p1">“Oh, you think I can’t be fun?” she drawls, gesturing with her cup. “I’m fun.”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, meet Fun Katara,” Sokka says, waving between them. “Fun Katara, Zuko.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko giggled, face flushed red from the liquor. “Nice to meet you.”</p><p class="p1">Katara leaned back, settling with her head in Aang’s lap. He smiled down at her, playing with a strand of her hair. It was easy, practiced, familiar.</p><p class="p1">“I’m always Fun Katara,” she said to Aang’s downturned face. “We’ve established this. I’m <em>fun.</em>”</p><p class="p1">“You are,” Aang murmured placidly. “You’re very fun.”</p><p class="p1">Katara picked up her head to shoot a glare to her brother. “See Sokka? <em>Fun</em>.” He wasn’t listening — Zuko was saying something, and he was laughing, the kind of belly laugh that resonated through the room. “He’s not listening to me.”</p><p class="p1">“Hm. I’m glad they’re not fighting anymore, though,” Aang said softly, just to her.</p><p class="p1">Katara scoffed. “Sokka should just do it already, I don’t know what he’s waiting around for,” she hissed.</p><p class="p1">“Well, it took us a while, didn’t it?”</p><p class="p1">“That’s not the point.”</p><p class="p1">He laughed a little. “I’m sure he’ll figure something out. Or, maybe Zuko will beat him to the punch.”</p><p class="p1">Katara’s eyes widened. “Wh — how do you keep finding out about things before me?” She smacked his leg lightly.</p><p class="p1">“Oops. Sorry. He told me not to tell anyone!”</p><p class="p1">“We’re married, I don’t count anymore.” Katara pouted for a moment — but couldn’t resist smiling when Aang poked her lip. “When’s he gonna…?”</p><p class="p1">Aang shrugged. “He didn’t say. I just helped him pick some stuff out that Sokka would probably like.”</p><p class="p1">“Spirits, he should have just asked <em>me</em>. I mean, I’m his sister, right?”</p><p class="p1">“That’s what I told Zuko!”</p><p class="p1">“Told Zuko what?” Sokka asked, ears finally tuning in to the other two people in the room.</p><p class="p1">Aang deflected. “Uhhh… that Momo needs more outfits!” At the mention of his name, Momo’s head perked up from where he was curled up on a cushion, napping.</p><p class="p1">“He looks silly enough already,” Sokka said, gesturing to him. Momo tilted his head. He was, at that moment, clad in an absurd fur vest that Aang had fashioned after Momo started shivering from the arctic cold.</p><p class="p1">Katara sat up again, careful not to spill her drink as she moved. “<em>I</em> think he could stand to look sillier.”</p><p class="p1">Momo ignored them, tucking his head between his paws again.</p><p class="p2"> </p><hr/><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">Zuko had never felt quite so lovestruck.</p><p class="p1">Even in the beginning, it was different. They’d been nervous, with bated breath, and a little delirious, but he was really making a fool out of himself now. Hanging off of his boyfriend, stealing pieces of the fried food Sokka kept buying, squeezing Sokka’s fingers tight between his, seeing Sokka painted vibrant in the light of the setting sun; Zuko felt as weightless as the first time he’d flown on Appa, and a good deal more content.</p><p class="p1">They hadn’t even really started the official process yet — there was a mind-numbingly long list of formalities (and likely several meetings with indignant ministers) to get through — but just making the decision had Zuko grinning every time Sokka looked at him. The heady question of <em>more</em> was drifting at the back of his mind, and —</p><p class="p1">“Seriously, just buy your own. What else is that royal cash good for?” Sokka groused through a mouth full of seal kebab.</p><p class="p1">“I wasn’t hungry then,” Zuko whined, turning to slip his arms around Sokka’s shoulders. Sokka looked angrily down at the kebab held up between them. “Just a little?”</p><p class="p1">“Zuko, I swear to the spirits above —” Sokka started, but Zuko gave him his sweetest smile, and then Sokka sighed and held out the kebab for Zuko to snatch a bite.</p><p class="p1">The seal was rich, delicious, almost melting in Zuko’s mouth. He swallowed, and planted a kiss on Sokka’s cheek.</p><p class="p1">“Thank youuu.”</p><p class="p1">“You’re really annoying, you know that?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka took Zuko’s hand anyway.</p><p class="p1">The solstice festival was similar in some ways to the ones Zuko knew from his homeland: music, delicious food, and dancing were all important parts. But there were different bits, too: elders telling tales of spirits and heroes to kids gathered around a cookfire, people playing tug-of-war, and a few members of the tribe dressed as spirits, acting out the passage of spirits from one world to another. It played out in and among the houses, flowing between homes and communal fires as easy as water.</p><p class="p1">The two of them flowed right over to Katara’s house, finding a couple young waterbenders tumbling around outside. They sent volleys of snow sailing through the air between them, until Sokka drew close enough to be illuminated by the fire inside, and one of them stopped.</p><p class="p1">“Master Katara! Sokka’s here!” the girl cried out towards the door, only to get beaned in the temple with a glob of snow. “Hey!”</p><p class="p1">“I got you!” another girl teased, ducking behind a snow bank when the first one began stomping in her direction.</p><p class="p1">Sokka pulled Zuko to the side with him, giving the girls a wide berth. They stumbled back when another child came barreling out of the house, breathless.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka’s here?” the boy chirped, and beamed at him. “Sokka, look what I made!” He produced a little carved fishhook.</p><p class="p1">Sokka knelt, looking at the hook with wide eyes. “Wow, you made this?” The boy nodded proudly. “Those fish don’t stand a chance. But, word to the wise —” he tucked his hand around his mouth conspiratorially, “Careful with the sharp end. You don’t want to get it stuck in your thumb — speaking from experience.”</p><p class="p1">The little boy scrunched up his nose at that, but giggled anyway. “Ewww. Okay, I promise I’ll be careful.” He stuck the fishhook in his pocket and raced over to the two girls, bending a snowball into the fray.</p><p class="p1">Sokka stood, turning back to Zuko, and stopped for a confused moment. “What?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko couldn’t help stammering; he’d been caught, staring moony-eyed at Sokka. “Nothing.” He pecked Sokka’s cheek. “You’re just… really good with kids, is all.” <em>Maybe, someday —</em></p><p class="p1">Sokka grinned, pulling Zuko along with him towards the door. “You big softie.”</p><p class="p1">“I’m not a <em>softie</em>.”</p><p class="p1">“Yes, you are —”</p><p class="p1">“No. Keep this out of my house,” Katara chided, brandishing a stirring spoon at them. “Disgusting.”</p><p class="p1">Aang laughed. He was on his back, sending little gusts of air up for Momo to float on. “Come on, Katara, it’s a holiday!”</p><p class="p1">“But they’re —”</p><p class="p1">“Be nice to your brother, Katara,” Hakoda says, half-way through a bowl.</p><p class="p1">She scowled, but let the pair plop down around the fire with the rest of them. Bato and Kanna were there, too, so the little house was filled to the brim with people, people looking at Zuko with warm eyes and — Zuko felt a little too full of warmth, himself. He’d packed away those royal robes, he was leaning in to Sokka’s side and holding his hand, and Bato was passing him a platter of seared arctic hen, and everything felt right.</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned to offer some arctic hen to Sokka, too, who looked at him with such bright eyes that it was all Zuko could do to keep himself from kissing him silly, right there… but he held himself back. It wouldn’t do to have Katara throw them out before they’d even had a bite to eat.</p><p class="p1">Still, Katara shooed them out when their bowls were <em>barely</em> empty, back into the chilly night alive with laughter and the faint drift of music on the breeze.</p><p class="p1">He let Sokka guide them — <em>I’ll let Sokka take me anywhere </em>— wandering, passing between houses, snow crunching under their feet. The sun had fully set, at some point when Zuko wasn’t looking. Out at the edge of town, the lights dimmed into the distance, only the suggestion of a fire still brushing the curve of Sokka’s cheek. He smiled at Zuko in the dark, pulling them both down into the snow. Zuko stumbled, tripping onto Sokka, getting a mouthful of snow in the process.</p><p class="p1">“Ah — Sokka,” he protested, spitting it out. “You could give me a warning, you know.”</p><p class="p1">“Where’s the fun in that?” Sokka’s mouth was so close, with Zuko on top of him in the snowbank — Zuko snuck a kiss, a gentle one, quiet and warm.</p><p class="p1">“Lay next to me,” Sokka whispered.</p><p class="p1">“Why? I can’t kiss you like that.”</p><p class="p1">“Trust me.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko flipped, and saw what Sokka was talking about.</p><p class="p1">Greens, pinks, purples swayed gently above them, swirling over a thick blanket of stars. Where the mountains of ice rose up in the distance, it seemed as if the lights above them could reach down, to kiss the peaks and drift across the snow. It took Zuko’s breath away.</p><p class="p1">He turned to Sokka, eyes wide and mouth open. Sokka was grinning, holding Zuko’s hand tight.</p><p class="p1">“Pretty, right?”</p><p class="p1"><em>Pretty? </em>“It’s incredible,” Zuko breathed, casting his eyes back to the heavens. He had read about these in his scrolls, he had seen some hints of them once or twice when wandering the icy South as a boy, but he’d never seen the lights in quite so much stunning glory.</p><p class="p1">Sokka tipped his head to the side, shifting, nestling it in the space between Zuko’s head and his shoulder.</p><p class="p1">“Do you remember when I saw the palace for the first time?” Sokka murmured, out of nowhere.</p><p class="p1">“Hm? When was that?” Zuko couldn’t remember.</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s breathing was just barely audible in Zuko’s ear, a steady beat anchoring Zuko to the earth. “After the war was over, but before the coronation. Well, I guess I saw a little of the outside on the Day of Black Sun, but I mean the inside.”</p><p class="p1">“Oh. I remember.” It was the same day Zuko had seen it for the first time since turning on his father — he remembered feeling a little out of place, sure of who he’d become, but unsure of who he was supposed to be inside those walls again.</p><p class="p1">“You were — we were all in your rooms.” Sokka reached to fiddle with a tassel of fur on Zuko’s parka. “And it was full of all this fancy stuff, and you just had — you had like, one bag. And it was so funny, seeing you there, just not at all — not at all the person we thought you were. And we all started laughing.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko remembered; he remembered his friends’ laughter soothing him like a balm.</p><p class="p1">“And I started crying, a little bit.” Zuko remembered that, too. “And you — you held my hand. No one else noticed me tear up, but you held my hand for a second.” Sokka let out a breath. “I don’t know why I’m talking about this. I guess I’m just… saying thanks. For being there for me.”</p><p class="p1">“Of course,” Zuko whispered, leaning his cheek against Sokka’s head. “You’re important to me.”</p><p class="p1">They laid like that for a long time, breathing with each other, watching the spirits flow languid above them, a silent dance. Zuko could have stayed there forever, with Sokka’s hand in his, leaning into each other, absorbing the sheer vastness of the stars winking above them. It felt a little like he did have forever — time stretched on without Zuko having any sense of it passing. There was just Sokka, and the silent love between them.</p><p class="p1">“Zuko.” Sokka leaned up, sitting cross-legged, so Zuko hauled himself up too.</p><p class="p1">“Hm?”</p><p class="p1">“I — I want you to know that I — fuck.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t really know when it happened, exactly, but at some point I fell in love with you. Like, hopelessly.” The sky was bright in Sokka’s eyes, all blues and greens and purples reflected back at Zuko. “I didn’t plan on it but — here I am.”</p><p class="p1">He let out a small laugh, a shy little thing that make Zuko’s chest warm. “I love you, too. Wow, you’re sappy tonight, huh?” He leaned in for a kiss.</p><p class="p1">“Shut up,” Sokka said into Zuko’s mouth, pulling back after a beat. “No, let me finish. I gotta finish.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko sat back, folding his hands politely. “Sorry, sorry. I’ll let you finish — go on.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka took a steadying breath. “Okay, here goes. I know we <em>just</em> said we’re going public, and it’s all a little fast, but you said — we told each other that this is <em>it</em>, and you are. Even when you were gone, I thought about you every day. You support me in everything I do, and you love me for who I am. Even the hard parts.”</p><p class="p1">Sokka fumbled, reaching into his parka. “I — I talked to Iroh and he said — fuck, it’s —” He pulls out a dagger, still in its sheath. “Everything we went through — fighting by your side felt right. We’re a good team. And… I want to be by your side for the rest of my life. If you want me there.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s chest lurched — <em>he’s really </em>— and Sokka unsheathed the dagger. The blade was lean, curved toward the end, polished so mirror-bright it reflected the pinpricks of stars above them; the hilt was carved ivory, etched in the shape of a dragon. Its body curled up, maw stretched wide where the blade emerged, one claw curling into the shape of the pommel and clutching a fire opal.</p><p class="p1">He was speechless. It was too much, he didn’t — he wondered, dizzily, who he’d tricked to be where he was, sitting in front of <em>Sokka</em>, who was looking at him with spirits in his eyes and asking him if — s<em>tars, he picked </em><b><em>me</em></b> —</p><p class="p1">Zuko’s brain finally pulled together a single coherent thought, and then he remembered what was in his pocket.</p><p class="p1">He laughed, breathless, giddy, tears prickling in his eyes, and Sokka’s brow screwed up in confusion.</p><p class="p1">“What’s so funny?” he asked, an unsure smile tugging at his mouth.</p><p class="p1">“Sokka, this is… it’s gorgeous —”</p><p class="p1">“I made it for you.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko choked, coughing around a burst of tears. “Oh, don’t tell me that.”</p><p class="p1">“Wh — why not?” Sokka asked, half-laughing, sheathing the dagger and placing it on the snow between them.</p><p class="p1">“You’re gonna make me cry!” Zuko said, and swiped away a few disobedient tears.</p><p class="p1">Sokka clasped Zuko’s hands, forcing Zuko to look at him again — his smile, his pinked cheeks, the little snowflakes caught on his eyelashes — but Zuko pulled one hand back to root around in his own pockets.</p><p class="p1">“I’m <em>laughing</em>,” Zuko explained, “Because I was going to ask you the same thing.”</p><p class="p1">He held out his gift, something that felt a little anticlimactic after what Sokka had presented him: a necklace, long so that it would hang over Sokka’s chest, with strands of blue beads and dentalium shells, all coming together in the center to hold an abalone pendant.</p><p class="p1">Sokka grinned, reaching out. “You got me a betrothal necklace?”</p><p class="p1">Zuko let the necklace drop into his hands. “Not exactly — it’s not, like, supposed to be that — it’s a betrothal gift. Of many.” Why did he feel out of breath? “There’s gifts, and — and I’ll have to have Iroh come back for the engagement ceremony, and we’ll have to talk to the Fire Sages, but — I just saw this, and it was so beautiful… and Aang said you’d like it.”</p><p class="p1">He looped the necklace over his head, letting it settle on his chest, outside the parka. “I do like it. What’s this? A bird?” he asked, turning the pendant in his hands.</p><p class="p1">“A sparrowkeet.” Sokka cocked a brow. “Like the one you gave me. At the cabin?”</p><p class="p1">Sokka’s face twisted oddly, and he sniffed, eyes filling all at once. “Zuko —”</p><p class="p1">“So yes? That’s yes?” Zuko prodded.</p><p class="p1">“Fucking yeah, Zuko, what did you think —” and Sokka leapt on him, pushing him into the snowbank, kissing him breathless.</p><p class="p1">He kissed the tears out of Sokka’s mouth, didn’t care that the snow was freezing on his neck, just wanted Sokka to keep kissing him frantically. Sokka’s arms wrapped around Zuko’s shoulders, mittened hands slipping under to hold Zuko’s head off the wet snow. Zuko clutched Sokka tight to him, holding on to Sokka’s waist for dear life. His head was spinning, full of greens and purples and Sokka’s blue eyes, of Sokka looking at him in the courtyard and at the cabin and on the boat and in his cottage. Zuko was afraid he might be dreaming, or else under a spirit’s thrall, and that one wrong breath would break the spell.</p><p class="p1">He felt like that — dizzy, helplessly happy, like his heart might burst — when they sat up, and also when they burst into Hakoda’s house, Sokka crowing the news, and when Aang had sighed <em>finally</em>. He felt like that when they woke up together the next morning, sleepy and warm. He felt like that even as the days drew on, going their separate ways for daily chores, then coming together for dinner each night.</p><p class="p1">It started to temper, just enough for Zuko to bear looking at Sokka in direct sunlight without grinning dopily, when the days began starting noticeably earlier, ending later, and the ice started receding, a whisper of spring. But there was still that little fumble that happened in Zuko’s chest when Sokka would kiss him, or when he would whisper <em>I love you</em> like a it was gift, just for him.</p><p class="p1">It was still there, permanent, when they finally boarded a ship, bound for the palace. Zuko looked out over the water, the ice floes dotting their horizon, and looked back at the Southern Water Tribe.</p><p class="p1">Sokka came up behind him, wrapping his arms around Zuko’s waist. “Time to go back.”</p><p class="p1">Zuko turned — Sokka was smiling, pressing his forehead into Zuko’s. He could see a strand of dentalium shells peeking out from under Sokka’s parka.</p><p class="p1">“I guess.” Zuko fiddled with the shells. “I’m a little… nervous.”</p><p class="p1">“I know. But you’ll have me.”</p><p class="p1">A smile bloomed on Zuko’s face. “Yeah. I’ll have you. You’ll have me, too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>That's a wrap! Wow it's insane that I actually finished this. I've never written something of this magnitude before and it feels a little bittersweet for it to be done. Looking back there are some major things I would change about it, and take the characters in different directions -- but I guess that's what future fics are for!</p><p>If you made it this far, thank you SO much for reading, and being patient with my weird updating timeline, and with my authorial self-indulgences. I hope you liked it, and I hope you'll keep reading more stuff from me in the future :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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